“Forgive and Forget”: Is It Really Possible?
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- Опубліковано 28 вер 2024
- Is it really possible to forgive and forget? No, it’s not in our power, but only with the power of the Holy Spirit can we forgive those who have hurt us. The Catechism states:
“It is not in our power not to feel or to forget an offense; but the heart that offers itself to the Holy Spirit turns injury into compassion and purifies the memory in transforming the hurt into intercession” (CCC 2843).
When we forgive, we can see the person who hurt us the way God sees them. The person who hurt you does not know how to love, and that is usually because they have never been truly loved. Forgiveness lets us see their brokenness, and gives us the grace to pray for their healing.
So it is not possible to forgive without God’s grace, but since he calls us to be free he longs for us to invite him into that hurt. If you’ve been unforgiving toward someone, God wants to free you from that unforgiveness. Leave justice to the Lord, and live with the peace of Christ:
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid” (John 14:27).
Think of our mother Mary, who watched as her son was murdered before her eyes. Pray the Rosary and let her teach you how to forgive as she and her son have, because it is in forgiving that we truly gain victory.
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A priest once told me that a good prayer is: "Forgive him, Lord because right now I can't" I found it helps very much.
TheKyPerson Thank you, I think I will use this.
A Catholic school rejected my brother as a child for his learning disability and refused to take him in. I feel much rage at this but try to pray to give forgiveness however I will never forget this and how this affected my Mother and Father, I pray that my heart will not be hardened but justice through God will prevail.
"... and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us ..."
Very powerful part of The Lord's Prayer. Definitely not always easy ... but a pretty good guide as far as what we should strive to do. Thank you, Jackie! Blessings to all.
I'm crying as I'm watching this. I have been struggling. I'm an emotional wreck. My heart was torn into a million pieces. My confidence shattered. My dreams crushed. My spirit is broken. I look alive, but in truth I am dead...I've been looking, searching for an answer, a solution, a door, but couldn't find any.
Thank you, you have saved me from me!..Thank God that I have stumbled across you..the mountain on my shoulders has just lifted!..Thank you from the deepest corners of my heart and soul..😞💖🙏
God bless you Jackie🕊🍀🙏😊.
This is amazing Jackie. I just watched your 54 days novena and my petition is for me to have a heart that is free from anger and be freed from an awful memor. I'm in my 3rd day already and God has given me a sign 😭
A great talk! The deepest wounds in my life have come from the people I least expected would cause them. Just like the flesh stripped from Christ as he was cruelly lashed, may God tear from my hardened heart, any and all unforgiveness so as to be free from the yoke of revenge and the poison of a pained-heart that wants retribution. May the balm of peace return once again. Amen.
My sister has betrayed me..she has hurt me more then anyone has ever hurt me! Our sisterhood has ended because of it! I Try to realize that this issue isn't really about me..it's about her...realizing this makes me feel sorry for her! When I think about it (because I can't forget..I tried) I still feel the pangs of hurt. After much pleading with Jesus to help with the pain..I have to say...I am moved from anger..to a place of pity! I swear He has eased it for me..He never gives us more then we can handle..and it was more then I could bare! We have a good and merciful God! ❤
I badly needed this one. I kept thinking about my ex but I should not message him for a lot of reasons. I always thought I have to forgive him every time he hurt, like how I always did. But now that we broke up, the pain just keeps coming back. Sometimes I feel at peace, knowing that God will still take care of him, and sometimes the pain comes back and it make me bitter thinking about him.
This video reminds me of God's love. I pray we both heal and just move on 🕊️🙏😔
Thank you so much for this video!!! A lot of family members have been hurt, my son and my mom to name a few... please pray for Russ and his father Mark who are both in need of healing. Godspeed!!
i really needed to hear this message today. thank you thank you thank you and God bless you.
Thank you, Jackie, for being a voice for the Holy Spirit. ❤️😢
Thank you for this beautiful message! A loved one of mine was deeply hurt by someone. Thank you for your deep message from Our Lord Jesus!
I think Fr. Mike's video on forgiveness is on point. He explained forgiveness perfectly.
I saw that happening in my own life and realized my memories about past events have changed...or at least the emotions... praying for your offenders every time you think of them works truly! Especially if you consider their offenses (I know for some people it is horrific and traumatic) in light of your own offenses against a Good and Holy God. I know what they did to you may be bad, but they have to answer to God, and woe to them. Focus rather on your own sins. Toil so that your fear of God may be out of love rather than just fear and then the horror of you and all people, including your abuser/offender hurting such a loving God is enough to move you with shame and pity even on their behalf...It’s a detachment. A detachment to the world that allows you to think this way. Would you believe that satan could use even your heartache to keep you attached to the earth and keep you from looking up? If you live as if nothing on earth could bring you true joy anyway then you can detach yourself from the disappointment that your life is not as perfect as you planned or as perfect as other people’s who didn’t get abused/hurt/damaged. All I can say is enter into the stations of the cross with your imagination, enter into your rosary!
True indeed.....It has been my fear that i will eaten by my anger and will be moved further away from God. I dont want that.
Praise the Lord Jesus Christ 🙏 True God and True Man
God Almighty, please take my heart with Your Holy Spirit, and help me forgive and forget this recent betrayal as I cannot at this moment. Please help me, God. I need you. My family needs you!
Thanks for this, I get fairly emotional when slighted so needed your's and the Church's guidance badly on this.
Thank you. I've got serious hurt and have always battled myself whether or not I've forgiven.
This is so beautiful. Thank you ❤
Thank you very much, Jackie, for this powerful message! This does helps me understand the importance of forgiving people who have hurt me as I may also needs their forgiveness as I may have hurt them even without my knowledge, and hoping God will grant us the grace to forget it altogether, since all these will finally leads us at peace and hopefully in eternity with God in Heaven. May God bless us all. Amen.
What a beautiful video ♥️ thank you!
To Forgive is to let go & let GOD. And NEVER Forget once Trust is broken that brought you to brokeness, it needs to be earned from that person in order for that relationship to have salvation.
M.M.
Thank you so much for this...I needed this today! 🙏❤️
It doesn’t exist for immature people they have to go the extra mile to destroy your life
Beautiful ❤
To the people of Ascension Presents, just something you should probably know. At the end of this video, a certain ad started playing. Here are the opening words as closely as I can remember: "Warning! The following commercial is not for women, but for men who want women to obsess over them. Using proven psychological techniques. . ." At that point, I hit SKIP AD. It's disturbing enough that ads of this nature are playing on UA-cam at all, but they definitely have no place on this channel. I don't know how much you can control what ads are on your videos, but I thought I should let you know about this so that you can do something, if you are able. God bless.
I always think of the story of Maria and her mother when I struggle with forgiving someone so it's funny that you mention it...
In Christianity the onus is always on the victim. There’s so much more concern & compassion for bullies & abusers. Denial & injustice are called forgiveness. People need to earn forgiveness by actually repenting, fully owning their sins & the damage they’ve caused. If people aren’t held fully accountable I don’t think they repent.
I was wondering, since when we forgive, what about them learning a lesson? Because I have no problem forgiving but if someone were to hurt me or hurt someone I love, what do I do? Because I don't know if some people will take advantage of it and keep hurting because I don't do anything or if they might turn a new leaf. It's the only confusing thing for me when it comes to this. I would appreciate the help!
There are abusers that are toxic. Forgive them but it dont necessary mean that you reconcile with them. Father kyle manno once said "The person who hurt you is not the one who can heal you"..Only the holy spirit does.
@@faithfulprofessional6886 Ah, I see, makes sense. Also, there was a case where a cop went into someone else's home by accident and shot him. The brother of the victim forgave her and said he doesn't want her to be in jail or something (I can't remember much of the details). It was very popular when it happened. Could you still want that person to go to jail even after forgiving them? It was something that was on my mind for a while now.
Wow. Thank you. 💖
God bless you
Thank you
Blessings . 🌷🌷🌷
Amen 🙏🙏🙏
How can I forget when doing so by keeping my mouth shut now that I finally am being allowed meaningful contact with my children and grandchildren again when doing so would mean that things might get so much worse for the next generation if I do while the same old same old lies continue to get told? Compassion should never include hiding the past to protect criminals who held children like hostages with Stolkholm syndrome while doing so would be neglecting the innocent on purpose all who would do anything to help protect the unborn and the vulnerable now that they are adults while in truth they are still being used as pawns by the same old men who believed that god cannot see thier evil deeds back then or now which they are still up to in thier manipulative ways? There is a big difference between forgiving and keeping your mouth shut while going along with the same old creepiness being desguised as love all over again while they are saying, "I was a terrible man [but now I have changed] while now in truth using my child as a go between to demand the same all over again -- Using me as his possesion for pleasure during booty calls without any respect while under his thumb.duri
💯
❤
I was recommend to come here by another viewer because I've recently started up a similar channel (Bible Breakout). Gotta say, I'm impressed. BTW, what camera are you using in this video?
Yes it is possible to forgive! But forget, you cannot forget because you learn from your mistakes. Forgetting cannot be easy because those are lessons we never went through. If these things never happened, we did not know. But forgive, we forgive because we love ourselves. We want to be loved. Love yourself. With Jesus, we are self loved. 🥺💓
Has this lady done this herself in some sense? Father forgive them...is not mentioned...Some of this sounds like an image of bargaining. ''As we forgive those....'' not ''since we forgive those'' in our forgiveness we get glimpse of God's forgiveness.
I enjoy your commentary for the lay Catholic, and maybe it’s just me, while I don’t think the make up and hair dress up is inappropriate in terms of modesty, but is not really exemplifying modesty either. Reading the lives of the saints in times past, like St. John Vianney, the holy pastors would cherish their women parishioners who strove for simplicity in all things. Beauty is to be concealed... I don’t want to see a thumbnail with a woman who has her hair made up and makeup on more than necessary for a Catholic video/commentary. Thoughts.
You're looking so pretty
The kind forgive, the fool forgets.
Fr Mike says.. Forgiveness is assessing everything the person has done to you, what it has cost you, and then saying I release you from having to pay me back, and give it to God.
Also forgive knowing their karma is going to catch up with them
Can you provide a link to a video where Father Mike said that? I'd love to hear it and share it.
@@ChevySpeedAddict I think that was one of the two videos that was shown at the end of this video, not sure tho, just guessing.
@@AP-mc5xe The only thing that gets me through the night.
I took a debt to start a business with the friend I ended up disappointed I forgave them and told them they could have everything. However they sent me a document to sign that I was paid so she could take over as I initiated the process of transfer of shares and had signed the forms for transfer then started rethinking my forgiveness and more I pay the debt I feel she should give back atleast 50% as that was what I promised her when we were starting. However now I feel what's right is her paying 50% so that the document. Dear God forgive am waiting on your voice
Thank you for this, I was abused growing up as a child and teen. Then married an abusive ex husband, and now four years later I am can say that the holy spirit really did heal me. The brokenness, PTSD, and having an annulment, now getting married to an amazing Catholic guy who has shown what love really is supposed to look like. God really is good. 🙏
Jackie you are my inspiration, I really want to be as passionate in faith as you are. You are beatiful and I don't mean just your soul. I'm so thankful for your videos. Please pray for me so I can be a good wife to my fiance and mother someday but most important to be a good catholic. God bless ❤❤❤
zuzanna - to so passionately want to be the best version of you means to me that you are already this amazing version. It just comes down to put it into practice this amazing true version of you. ❤️
@@claudiap.6838 ... Juliana is correct, Zuzanna. I have my own story but this in not about me and this isn't the place, but both Jackie and Juliana are spot on. You have the passion, now ask the Lord in prayer through "Mama Mary" to lead you to the place He has waiting for you. God Bless. I will be praying for you.
@@claudiap.6838 Thank you so much! It's silly, but I'm overwhelmed right now. It's amazing how when you don't belive in yourself there is someone who belives in you ❤ Lots of love for you!
@@coffeebreak342 Thank to you as well. I'm praying for it and I have hope!
I would also add, pray to find a man that wants to be a good husband to you too. That wants to serve his wife and family as well as you want to
I was raped as a twelve year old I'm nearly twenty now but I still find it hard to forgive and forget to this person. I even think violent thoughts towards them. (they live far away and I would never do this ) but I pray on it all the time. And I do pray for them. It really does helps
My dear Heavenly Father, In the name of Jesus Christ with the power of the Holy Spirit to be compassionate towards those that Offended me 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾❤️
I don't think I've ever seen Jackie this emotional. Thank you for this gift 🙏🏾Forgiveness is hard, but such a necessary part of reconnecting with who we are outside of our pain.
I did a lot of immoral things before becoming Catholic. When I look at my past, I find it hard to forget and forgive myself.
Now there indeed is a deep and honest comment.
No matter what you've done in the past, Jesus will forgive you if you confess your sins to Him. Trust in His Mercy. He loves you. You are His child regardless of your past.
Ullas Stephen
Excellent. All sorted now.
This means you don’t love yourself.
@@caribaez5711 I don't. The sins I committed were do to me trying to find love from other people because I lack it for myself.
Jackie you were so emotional and I just loved that about you, it’s just amazing. God bless you, remember Jesus loves you ❤️👌🏾🇰🇪☀️💕🙏🏾
Thank you,you've helped me grow spiritually. Loads of love and prayers ❤️
Mary, our blessed mother gave us an example. Imagine how she feels, the sorrows she went through, witnessing how her son was crucified because of persecutions, took it all with dignity. She has forgiven those who hurt her son and moved on.
We are called to forgive the repentant, just as the Lord forgives us when we confess our sins, ask His forgiveness and make a firm purpose of amendment.
Christ forgave so many sorrowful people in His time here... He forgave the good thief but not the other. And He actually asked the Father to forgive the unrepentant in His very last breaths. He could have said, I forgive you... but He didn’t.
So we must be clear in the words we use. Throughout Scripture, Jesus teaches repentance, not blanket or forced forgiveness. We have no power greater than His to forgive or to interfere with another’s conversion and salvation by calling him forgiven when he doesn’t demonstrate a desire for our forgiveness.
Finally, we must continue to love the unrepentant. We pray for his conversion of heart and turn his debt over to the Lord. No grudges, vengeance, gossip, hatred. That is not forgiveness, it’s love. Forgiveness from God Himself is conditional. But love has no conditions.
The Lord can and will heal our wounds even without an apology of the one who injured us. We can trust turning it all over to Him as Christ did... Father, forgive them. Help me to love.
Thank you for offering this comment. I believe this is the right approach to forgiveness. Forgive the repentant and leave forgiving the unrepentant on God, while working on loving the unrepentant. You gave exact words to what I was struggling to understand for a very long time.
Maybe not "forget" .... depending how deep a wound. But always forgive because that's what us Christians do.
Remember, forgiveness does not equal reconciliation.
this is something I've struggled with...I believe I've forgiven, but sometimes I question if I truly have because I know I would just as easily fall back into patterns of anger if I even attempt reconciliation.
William Fleming me too
Iam also for forgive but not forget which would be a naive move, because of course forgive like god forgive you but it doesn't mean you should approach somebody who abused , betrayed or harmed you without Caution.
Bulbin .... and perhaps I shouldn’t forget how something felt in order that I don’t do someone else a similar hurt
Forgiveness doesn’t require reconciliation in a physical sense. If you’ve parted ways with someone because the relationship became toxic or something happened, then no you don’t need to hang out or communicate with that person again. However, we must forgive to the best of our ability and PRAY for our enemy. Not everyone is our friend in this life, and that is okay. But they are still a child of God.
I just prayed twice n the second time. She mentioned of the holy spirit n to pray to it I cried. I've been in pain n anger I pray n it wont go away. But this video was so touching n inspirational. O holy spirit come to me n liberate me of this resentment n find peace n forgiveness for the people that did me wrong n find peace in Gods love n mercy. Amen.
I'll keep it short: this was one of the deepest videos I've ever seen on youtube. Thank you Jackie
I can see how my abusers were broken - but it still doesn't make it right. It just does not.
I was wondering something. Can we forgive them by words or in silence? For example, forgive the person who died or forgive the person you can't find in person like many years ago to say it? Is it all just letting go grudges? That's it? Also, God bless you, Jackie! 🙏
When my first love broke up with me, I was hurt for a long time, and bitterness was easy to pick apart everything I thought he fell short in. But eventually, one day I saw him and thought he is also the Father's, and I was honored to love him for the time I did. Remembering the true identity of all of us, Chosen and Loved by the Almighty God really is a powerful change in perspective. It doesn't mean that all the hurt goes away, but the bitterness does, and healing begins
Thank you. I will be thinking about this a lot and wondering about its timing for me personally, particularly as I only found and subbed to you just a couple of days ago 😊
Edit - actually it was only this morning I just saw this channel and subbed!
"Turn to Holy Spirit..... amazing.
It really helped me.
Thank you.
This was so powerful, thank you so much - I needed to hear this.
Thank you, Jackie! God bless.
"In 1983, Pope John Paul II visited his would-be assassin, Mehmet Ali Ağca. They had a private conversation, and emerged as friends. The pope stayed in touch with Ağca’s family during his incarceration and in 2000, requested that he be pardoned.
The request was granted. Ağca was released and deported to Turkey, where he was imprisoned for the life sentence he had fled decades prior.
He converted to Christianity while incarcerated, and was finally released in 2010.
In December 2014, he returned to Rome and laid two dozen white roses at St. John Paul's tomb." ~ Forgive*
God is great. This talk is need of time as it has happened to me now. God's amazing unexpected intervention through CCC.
No
All of you here, I don’t ask for much but please pray for my 15 year old sister. She’s battling depression and has anger in her heart. Keep her in your prayers please and thank you.
Praying
In Australia in this past few months we had an awful accident in Sydney, where a young man driving under the influence of alcohol accidentally drove through a group of children and ended the lives of 3 (I think) young children from a Catholic family.
The parents of the children (I think 2 were siblings, one was a relative) only made one public announcement, where they stated that they were suffering immensely, but that they forgive the driver, and wish no harm to come to him or his family. They mentioned that their children were now with Christ in heaven, and that they leave the judgement of the driver to the human judges judging his actions, and merciful God judging his heart. They praised the mercy of Jesus Christ and refused to be drawn into any talk regarding the trial etc.
I cannot imagine how hard this was, and all I could think was that there are amazing witnesses out there, who show us the way. I only hope I have the strength if I'm ever in that moment.
Thanks Jackie and co. for this video. I love that Jackie cries. It shows how real these videos are for the presenters. It's not a job or an obligation. It's a heartfelt and true message. I love that.
Between God and man it is; between man it is not. You should never trust anyone that much. Perhaps it shouldn't be that way, but both God's reality and the worlds reality exist and both generate cold hard truths.
Beautiful and profound, Jackie. Thank you.
Woah ! Needed this
If you already asked forgiveness, but still the other person won't or just couldn't, is it ok to just leave everything to God? Or should I persist? I was just thinking to give him more time. 💔 I'm just afraid that in this pandemic, he already found a new one... 😔
I currently believe that forgiveness is "both and"... meaning pray to God for 70x7 levels of forgiveness...I also have learned I may feel pain for trespasses. My response to that pain is my choice. As well, i care self respectfully - with boundaries- it's not wise to allow abusers, be it ones mom, etc... to be exposed to repeated damaging comments... healthy boundaries with wise interaction and assertive skills are a big part of my experience... I can learn to keep a transformational intercession...
as well I use the analogy of a blind man... Because who can blame a blind man for not seeing? Even if he hits you in the leg with his walking stick? Similar to those who have suffered great levels of abuse especially in childhood and especially in infancy where there was just absolutely no way an innocent child had protection available ...
not that it's necessary to keep drumming up while excuses but there is significant amounts of abuse in the world and not every situation is just a one-off extreme scenario... abuse is not a one-off extreme scenario in general is it happens to many.. So kindly, I don't try and think I'm using an excuse, per se..to justify indignation
I resonate with the idea of rational hurt feelings however there are better prayerful christ-like responses... I consider that so to speak a cross of one's life perhaps... However in humility I find the reason for the "cross" is a greater opportunity lift up my own suffering for the sake of Christ and Trust deeper into that faith...
about three months ago I started realizing that when I had thoughts of difficult people and or abusers and or just difficulty with interacting in a christ-like fashion that automatic prayer is the best antidote..
Thank you!! I needed this sooooo much....especially today. God bless your family!!🙏♥️🥰
That was beautiful Jackie!
Thank you God for speaking through her!!!!
Am still broken. Thanks for this inspiration. 😊
I'm NOT RELIGIOUS AT ALL..AND THIS HELPS...I THOUGHT I WAS IN THE WRONG .I do sometimes think of the wrong my Ex did to me because of the pain I have. But I do deep down forgive him..I think when I think of what he actually did..it's JUST A REMINDER TO ME. IS ALL😢😂.BUT IM HEALING AND NEED TO KEEP FOCUSING ON THT
The timing of this video.... wow. Thank you. 🙏🏼
Lord, take the pain that others have given me and use it for their salvation
Is it possible? Short answer, no. Longer answer is in the parable with the servant who owed a bunch of money. The guy was to be sold along with his kids, wife, house and all. He comes to the master and asks for mercy. The master forgives all the debt.
Now the guy comes to his servant and grabs him by the neck. That servant asks for time so he can repay the debt. But this one is a no-no.
Now the friends of that guy come to the master and report what has just happened. And the master REMEMBERS what he (the master did), and re-does the decision. The servant is to be in jail for as long as he doesn't pay all he owes. So, forgiving is NOT forgetting.
You have no idea how much I needed to hear this video, thank you
There are so many people - both women and men, but let's face it, more women who have gone through trauma (sexual, physical, mental, verbal) and abuse. It's awful. I don't think I can ever forgive. Yeah, I really don't think that I can.
Such an emotional video from you, Jackie. God bless you.
What is necessary for forgiveness? Did the Christ forgive the third man on the crosses? The Jews who condemned Him? No. He forgave the man who said his punishment was just. He forgave those who knew not what they do. He didn’t forgive those who knew and did nothing. It is impossible to truly will the good of another by false forgiveness, in which they continue to sin. Be careful.
How do I forgive and still cut toxic family members off? #AskAscension
That is my issue. Two people that i loved the must betrayed me. In my heart, I have forgiven them. I even pray for them. The problem is i was never able to have the same relationship with them. Is that enough?
Forgiveness is possible... It's not possible to forget!!!
What happens when it was my own sibling that hurt me. Even if I forgive her I still look at her and remember.
Jackie please forgive me for all the severe comments I've left on your channel
This was great! You're so good Jackie, thank you!!! 🙏💖
God bless you Jackie, and may HE give you the strength and wisdom you need to work with these young women.
Take care of yourself too.
Congrats on your new baby!
Thank you for this Jackie...
It's not in our power... O lord we need your help
Mary, Undoer of Knots 🙏
Turn to Holy Spirit... injury to compassion and intercede....
Great.Sp. direction.
Thank you Jackie Angel. I appreciate your beautiful and heartfelt perspective. Just an aside - you're already a beautiful woman. Have you started wearing more makeup? You DO NOT need it! You already have much natural beauty!
Anna Eric haha I was so deeply moved by her talk I didn’t notice any make up whatsoever and with all due respect, why does this even matter?
🌹
Thanks Jackie.
A prayer that was taught to me:
“Jesus Christ, you and I together forgive [insert name]. Amen.”
Forgiveness is the hardest thing to do.