@@orsonzedd dear god If my girlfriend had tentacles, and was mostly human, I would probably do everything she ever asked of me because you know, brain slugs
@@RKYT0 Kind of, they have a ganglia in each arm. Which, at least colloquially, counts as a brain. I'm not sure if it meets a scientific definition of a brain, but I do know that Cephlapod intelligent evolved almost completely independently from vertebrate intelligence.
Yeah same. And I think a man is sexiest when he shares his knowledge with me (I haven't had any experience of liking a girl ). I want a partner that can explore the world with me together.
@@jf5740 Do either of you two have a discord server I could meet you through? Or an alt account that I could add? (I wouldn't advise giving out a main account on here)
@@jf5740 This!! I identify with this. Someone who is curious, open minded, WANTS to understand something they don't, shares ideas and mental discoveries, explore and learn about the world through experiences. *swoon*
Gonna throw in my two cents here.. imagine thinking you have no libido until one day an intellectual debate floods your basement 😂 When I found this term I felt seen and represented. It’s not to say I’m smarter than anyone, it’s to say; I’m not a prude who doesn’t desire sex. Turns out, my body just responds sexually to intellectual stimulation.
I've though of myself this way but I don't go around bragging about it. I base this on the fact that, while I am not sexually aroused by raw intelligence, I am turned off by dumb. I have found a person attractive, until I talked to them. I have also been more attracted to people once I learn more about them. I guess I've just been thinking about the term in a wrong/different way
I have quite similar feelings. Like what you said, I could be sexually aroused by people's appearance, while the thing is being dumb would easily ruin the feeling and turn me off. I don't see sapiosexual as an sexual-orientation but more like a type of personality. It's more like being a Gemini, Libra or Leo (if you believe zodiac signs).
Damn, was looking for a video on actual Sapiosexuality but you’re just shaming people. Not everyone cares about intelligence, and it’s not just about being “smart.” It’s not being physically attracted to someone until you’ve understood their mind, getting turned on by science type or philosophical conversations, in a way that’s as exciting for other people like intimacy. You can accept a feet fetish but not a brain one? You can find the mind attractive and the body repulsive, and vice versa. I have met people I had no reason to like, other then they way they thought was sexy. You’ve really taken the time out of your day to judge what is attractive to someone else, which doesn’t seem attractive to anyone. Terms like this are important because I can let a partner know that it’s not so much body parts and identity yet, but that exploring the mind creates the physical sensations. This was just a judgmental rant on a singular case study and your personal experience. I don’t really care if people like you understand what it means, because at the end of the day someone else’s sexuality isn’t any of your business. Are we really still having this orientation conversation?
Fucking same... To be realistic where did the teacher kink come from? The lust for knowledge. I'm not necessarily physically attracted to old white women older black gentleman... But Neil deGrasse Tyson and Geena Davis (Virginia Elizabeth Davis) are two of the most attractive human beings in the world to me. I would literally do them both at the same time as long as we could have a conversation before or after. Both have IQs over 160 and are members of Mensa.
This is something that was brought up to me in conversation i was told that he thought i was a sapiosexual and i never heard of the term i don't really fit into any label type. All i know is that i am attracted to the person whom i'm talking withs brain over their visual appearance and not because i'm brainy it's quite the opposite i have a issue retaining information. It's not their IQ either it's just the knowledge they've learned throughout life that i want to hear about to feel if we even have a connection chemistry.
That's exactly what real sapiosexualism is like, not all of the misconceptions she's helping spread. Another big sapiosexual thing is when you aren't initially attracted to someone, but after taking, and learning about them you realize how smart they are (not necessarily "math smart.") I don't think intelligence is that important in a partner, it's not! It's simply attractive to me. Please do some good research and maybe 100% discard all of this garbage.
Sometimes I feel like the term “smart” carried a lot less weight when self-applied. Kind of like “nice” or “nice guy.” If you call yourself these words vs if someone else calls you them. This makes a lot of difference.
Amen to that. I'd also add, "rational", "skeptical", and "logical" to that category of words. And I can think of a few political labels that have lost their weight in the same way too, like "liberal".
Richard Head, based on your UA-cam channel, I know you're saying that as a dig against social justice, but you accidentally made a reasonable point. There have been instances of people who self-apply social justice labels (particularly with male feminists) who don't walk the walk even if they have the rhetoric down pat. That's mostly why I'm hesitant to call myself a feminist even though my political beliefs align with feminism; it feels presumptuous.
vitamindubya I find that the reverse is true too though. For example, if someone says I’m smart, I am always like, “nah, I just read a lot and am curious about the world,” because I don’t consider myself of significant intelligence, they usually think that I am being condescending.
I think it would have standards a spectrum of sorts, like how some people have a particular trait they prefer... but usually settle for less once a relationship begins to bud with that person. In other words yeah Hawking's papers may turn them on, but other traits like the robotic voice may be a turn off. Maybe Richard Dawkins? anyways there is a lot of traits that matter when describing the desires of a person, but the actual action of entering a relationship and progressing to other levels can deter from such selection; i.e. how some fawn over the appearance or sound of a particular movie star, but end up with less as they find someone who is compatible to them on a relationship level. I've known people who prefer short/tall partners, large/small [insert body part/s], a particular hair color/style, a particular skin tone, etc and up with more or less the opposite. I've even seen people who are adamant about their gender preferences and end up being with the opposite because the relationships they have is more important than just their personal desires.
I mean...in theory, even non-sapiosexuals could have considered Stephen Hawking incredibly sexy while he was alive. He was married two different times.
I use sapiosexual as a way of specifying that my sexual arousal is accessed through conversation and story telling in combination with touch while visual stimuli seems to be much less of a factor in my arousal than is common in most. Physical stimulation alone, or even with "vanilla conversation" is usually not enough to excite me. I'm a huge fan of story telling and roleplay in the bedroom and concepts I've applied to my partner are also a part of my primary sexual responses. I may experience an attraction to someone who is intelligent because of their interactions but that doesn't mean that I will find people attractive based on their IQ alone. Idk, maybe that's some sort of sapio/emosexual, maybe I have a tendency towards sapiosexuality and maybe mine is yet to be defined
Gobsmacked by your comment in a good way it made me smile from ear to ear it's the first time i've seen anyone describe it exactly how i feel,thank you for sharing :)
So you like conversations with people you connect with, and are not turned on just by looking at a Random Hot Person? That’s how a lot of humans are.. Are you straight? Gay? Bi? Are conversation and storytelling equally arousing to you no matter the gender or appearance of the person? Or could it be that you are hetero-, homo-, bi-, or pansexual like every other human and also happen to have personality preferences for potential partners....like every other human...
@@randomnessiscool I mean... That is very reductionist... I doubt a lot of people like to have conversations WHILE having sex, and the physical act being a response to it. Also, in my case I am bi, but it has nothing to do one with the other. They can be separate. I feel is not ok to gatekeep sexualities. Don't You think maybe is better for everyone involved to have a word to describe it, so there are not surprises later?
Saying you are sapiosexual is not shallow or means you think your better. If you are naturally attracted to someone who is physically fit or sexy does that mean you are thinking your more physically fit or better yourself? No.
FYI: Rebecca, sapiosexuals women do exist, although some are not even aware of the term "sapiosexuals", because it is a relatively new term. They tend to be women who are aware of their intellectual limitations and seeking men with a brain. Even older women, who cannot procreate anymore, still are attractive to these kind of men. As a man, I've been "the receiving end", and my LTR have been with ladies who are attracted to intelligent men, regardless any catchy name like "sapiosexuals".
There are abusers in every preference category.its ok to be attracted to or put more weight on a person’s intellect and ability to hold a conversation than their extremities ie penis, bra size, weight. I know MANY people both men and women who care more about how hot a person is than whether or not they can hold a conversation, ESPECIALLY with the superficiality of the social media age we’re in.
I thought sapiosexual and other things like demisexual, were labels describing sexuality and not orientations. So someone can be bisexual but also sapiosexual. Or someone can be homosexual and only really develop sexual attraction when they form emotional connections to someone of the same sex.
Im a Sapiosexual and im not interested in this video. We are not ONLY attracted to intelligence. Its one of the qualities we admire in others because they stimulate our minds. We cant stand boredom.
Intellect is not only how many chess games someone had. Intellect is Social intellect, emotional intellect and academic intellect. Sociopaths are intelligent too. Psychopats are extraordinary smart. Most of serial killers scored IQ higer than 140. Sooooooo....sapiosexuality are not based only on how many books someone readed in life. Not at all. I can call it more like, intimate prefference, some are romantic, some are in bdsm, some like watch movies to be on "wave"😄. Some are turned on by someones individual intelligence, aka - how that person sees and explores the world. Long conversations about history, literature, or something else, makes that "bonding sparkle" 😌😏
I'm a non apologetic Sapiosexual. Non egotistical. Non narcissistic. I find intellectual people sexy, attractive and candidates for potentially a long term relationship.
I hate chess but I do sometimes get aroused by, as you said, slightly more attractive people, who are doing math. I always thought the term "sapiosexual" is just really pretentious though and thought of it as a kink. A math kink.
I hate that I am so late to this conversation as I am trying to figure out things myself. I consider myself to be a sapiosexual, but I don't think it is necessarily more narcissistic than normal sexual attraction. It can be superficial, most times it is. No matter how much physical stimulation there is, I cannot get aroused if there is not a conversation at the same time. Yes, it is VERY weird to be engaged in a sexual activity and suddenly ask the other person about a controversial political opinion. It really doesn't matter what the topic is... If they can talk passionately about it it's enough. In my case, it is not about feeling smart. It is because I don't feel smart enough. I think is the same as feeling good when you have sex with someone who is more attractive. If there is another term for it I will gladly use it, but I kind of need a way to tell people what to expect... Before it happens.
Generally I call myself Sapiosexuals jokingly, for the reasons said in this vid, but I am extremely attracted to intelligence. I mean the mere contemplation of my ex girlfriend in and of itself would excite me. She was cute yes, but her critical thinking in and of itself was by a million miles what I was attracted to. but calling myself sapiosexual would be cringe
This is a vapid analysis of sapiosexuality and makes the very binary assumption that intelligence is the ONLY thing to which sapiosexuals are attracted. Hint: it's not. Calling yourself a sapiosexual merely means that intelligence is more important to you than it might be to other people - that you put more weight on it than other features of sexual attraction. That doesnt' seem all that narcissistic or arrogant to me, but if you want to create a false controversy because you don't have something better to vlog about, then why not interpret this form of sexuality in the most simplistic way possible and then throw everyone who subscribes to it under the bus. This is pretty bush league stuff from Rebecca to be honest because I normally love her. Also, if you're eating up this vlog without questioning it and agreeing that sapiosexuals are the spawn of satan then I'm pretty sure you aren't what sapiosexuals are looking for anyway.
people also say "everyone is demisexual" and that demisexuals just wanna feel superior. but no. i don't think being demisexual makes me superior to anyone. my sexuality is involuntary like anyone else's. so when someone says that their sexuality depends on mental stimulation, i take their word for it. maybe they're lying or mistaken, but who cares? it doesn't hurt anything to take their word, just like i want people to take my word on my sexuality (and similarly on my gender).
It's supposed to be a type and not a sexuality. Is there supposed to be a sexuality for people who prefer emo partners? Hell no. This kind of "sexuality" is exactly what hinders the acceptance of the lgbt+ community.
I doubt anyone is completely sapiosexual, with no other kinds of attraction. However, I think it's one of the ingredients that can go into who we're attracted to. Myself, I was largely asexual in my teens and early twenties when, according to pop culture you're "supposed to" be highly sexual. That's likely where the seeds of my sapiosexuality were sown. As I did experience sexual attraction, sapiosexuality was one of the things I would look for. Remember the character Dr. Brenner, played by Emily Deschanel, in the TV show Bones? I found I was very much attracted to her, who is both attractive in appearance and quite intellectual. Similarly, if someone is attractive in appearance but has a bad personality I find it a total turnoff. That's it, don't bother passing go and don't collect $200. I don't follow them at all, but supposedly the Kardashians are attractive. They don't have anything worthwhile to say and do absolutely nothing for me. I find far more attraction even in older women who are interesting such as Ruth Goodman, about 60 years old, who has been in many interesting BBC documentary shows.
You begin by saying how the phenomenon of being a sapiosexual is narcissistic and stupid. Then you go on to say “as a sapiosexual” which is 😂. I am not sure how much research was done into this phenomenon of being a sapiosexual when you had created this video, but, cherry picking a study conducted that was clearly as you say badly conducted and how it “could have been great” does not signify that the phenomenon is bollocks, it only signifies that BETTER studies need to be conducted to either prove or disprove this phenomenon. I have read a few studies recently and In conclusion having a strong sexual attraction to say a male of higher intellect had a biologically linked motive being that “intelligent men produce healthier sperm” which is a determinant of reproductive success.
Intelligence is a spectrum and mainly meaning the person and energy that is the person as whole and what you can learn about them to understand and study them as one should be it’s just marveling at them for who they are as a person and all the possibilities of your personalities and having a love to learn this isn’t all bad but I think it’s very misunderstood when I was young no one knew what is was and I wouldn’t even bother telling them back in 2006 in the south if I can’t stay up all night talking about random facts and learning more about one another out side by a fire kinda thing why are we even friends
This video has so many incorrect assumptions. Many people are turned on by those less intelligent than them and exclusively date or even marry people with a lower IQ. The video is basically saying it's okay to be a little bit of something but impossible to be a lot of something. I just don't get the logic.
I was domestically/sexually abused by someone who when we first met called them self this, in hindsight i consider its use a red flag that someone is trying to disarm me toward otherwise inappropriate sexual advances down the line and ingratiate themselves with me quickly, both behaviours when mixed together being the foundation Grooming can take place.
A real Sapiosexual wouldn't put it out there that he or she is a sapio. He or she will just be more engaged to a person who displays intellect in a number of spectrum.
Furst time hearing about that term but the way u explaned i guess i am a sapiosexual *0:40* okay no.We dont say that liking someone for appearacne is shallow and that were better and smarter and thats why we like intellegante people.The sexy part is how in a room of people he/she could OWN it by being smart and getting everyones attention.We just like it when a guy isnt like "ohh pftt im gonna study? ThAts fOr loSeRs and uGlY NERDSS" and is proud and can show the things he can do or the things hes good at.It doesnt have to be math of smt it can be the love of sport and knowing a lot about it,the love for computers or anything.Its about being different and not being ashamed about telling the world about it.We dont were better for liking intellegnet guys..it just..is sexier to us Also one can be dumb and like smart guys so it has nothing to do with being narcisistic Bruh no i can not masturbate to someone talking and looks do matter a bit but the smartness is what first catches our attention and it impresses us.I dont wantt to belive i like intellegance more i just saw that every of my previous crushes are ones that share the interest in math/physics (or being intellegante in general and has his own interests) and doesnt think of anything as too difficult and immposible.Doesnt mean i like every guy whos smart i do care about looks but if hes dumb and has no interest in things and is closed minded..he aint it
Hey No disrespect. But i think you are taking the definition too literal. The “SapioSexuals should be able to get off by watching a chess match” was a goofy analogy because i believe for SapioSexuals; intelligence is a major ELEMENT that is not required but extremely preferred when pertaining to arousal. I am attracted to women. But that doesn’t mean i can just watch ANY women undress herself and feel arousal. There are more elements that go into the act of being aroused. You can be intelligent but be a smart ass which is a turn off for me. Just how i am attracted to women but not obese women. Because that’s gross..to me. There is more to it then just intelligence. It’s almost like the female anatomy being the Cocktail. The intelligence being the perfect amount of alcohol. And the physical appearance being the salt rim + the garnish + everything else that makes the drink actually taste good. Smart ass women taste more like Ever-clear. Sure it’ll stimulate my mind but the intake will not be enjoyable and i’ll have to force myself to go through with it. But that’s me. I can drink most cocktails but only the ones made the right way can really stimulate my mind. Leaving me in a hypotonic state almost. Possibly even change my life. Might mess around and find my favorite drink that gets me every time.
I haven’t taken the time to identify with any particular sexuality. I appreciate your points and agree with all of them. I am hoping and expecting that sapoisexualism is a real thing. I can’t prove anything to you, and that’s not what I’m here to do, but I can say that my arousal based on things like looks and kindness is the same as when someone is lecturing about Chemistry and is really passionate about it. Now, I do know that I am immensely intelligent and intellectual (it’s a fact; I don’t need to call my self a sapiosexual or anything else to prove it), and I do know that intelligent people often feel very lonely in their perception and experience of the world, so perhaps the legitimate “sapiosexual” is more of a manifestation of they’re longing for someone like themselves, for normal camaraderie. In this case you’d be correct in saying that it shouldn’t be it’s own sexuality bc it’s not entirely independent of other sexualities. (Unless of course it is, but in the current hypothetical case it’s not.) Perhaps it’s the same as if someone really appreciated music or wilderness survival or whatever and they wanted to share that with someone; it’s just that the hobby here would be something involving “advanced intellect.” The only thing is I’m not entirely sure how the actual sexual component itself (as opposed to platonic intimacy) would play into that. I get that a lot of people wanna sound cooler or feel better about themselves in saying that they are intelligent or like intelligent people or activities or whatever, but some people are actually especially intelligent and just like people of different sports, mental illnesses, sexualities, hobbies, whatever, they too face their own set of gifts and struggles in society, with which it sounds like you agree. A lot to think about. Thanks for the good vid.
I'm an Asexual Sapioromamtic... I didn't know people got turned on... _by anything-_ I don't think I'm better than others, I don't _Value_ Intelligence, I value someone who I can be with. Tho I only feel attraction when I think someone is smart. I don't really care.
Also, I deliberately want a partner who ain't too smart because I feel like that which we humans consider "intelligence" misses something fundamental about the purposelessness of life by constructing a sort of teleological cult of constant human improvement. I'd rather keep the long, protracted ontological-epistemological debates to my friends than risk bringing them into my household.
My issue with this video is that it compartmentalizes sexual identities. Sexual orientations and attractions are muti layered. You can be gay, bi, or pan and also sapiosexual. I also would like to add that this could also describe people who need deep intellectual stimulation to be aroused. This feels like it's attraction shaming.
I know that below average intelligence in a partner causes me to lose a lot of interest. It’s a big turn off for me. Small talk and regular conversations with a partner day after day causes me to become unbelievably bored. I really need intellectual stimulation from my partner. Based on my understanding it has very little to do with sexual orientation… I’m straight and just like girls who can give me the mental stimulation I need. The most fun and interesting experiences with women in my life have been with the more intelligent women regardless of how attractive they were compared to others in my life.
Couldnt find my kind, ended up with a fallen angel who has the wisdom of the ages, now we're talking! Lol but seriously, these kind of people do exist.
Does it count as being sapiosexual if you are immediately turned off by someone you think is otherwise gorgeous, if they start talking or writing and turn out to be an idiot? That's kind of how I always viewed this term - as an attraction factor that rides alongside primary attraction to their sex or gender or whatever.
I've fallen for many girls whom I've thought of as being very smart... I wasn't sexually aroused .It was more like the attraction you get for someones face... What I mean is for example being facially attracted doesn't equate to wanting to having sex. If I find a woman attactive I want to dive deep in her mind and talk to her more about how she conceptualizes the world. Learning something new is always a where the gems are. This eventually gets me to finding her sexually attactive. When I told this one girl I have a pattern of falling for intelligent woman she told me I was a sapiosexual. But this video has made very skeptical😅
I’m Sapiophilia , I’m very attracted to the guy with highly intelligent and a guy with glasses 😂, it’s hard to explain, when the guy who has and have Highly intelligent, I’m very focusing of their words ,how they’re deep words, their brain,its kinda hard to explain, when they become sarcastic, I just cannot help it, and all of their words have meaning and how they explain. Most men I dated they asked me what kind of guy I’m looking for, and my answer is intelligent lol I know it’s weird but that’s honest 😂😂 and my favorite movie is Sherlock, puzzle movie, figuring out movie , I dated a Doctor who have highly intelligent, and a lawyer it’s kinda fun to have debate with them sometimes, and I end up marrying a guy who have high IQ .😂
Hi Rebecca! I enjoyed your video and I think you presented it very professionally! I am a sapiophile but not narcissist, just more attracted to someone that can have an intelligent conversation, can stand up for themselves, great ideas and opinions, etc... If a person lacked emotional intelligence or stimulating communication, I couldn't go to the next level, even if I was physically attracted to them. I think you are a very intelligent person due to how you presented this video. You might be a closet sapiophile, you just haven't come out yet.
Being a sapiosexual has nothing to do with feeling like you're better than someone; it's just someone attracted to intellectual people. I don't think any less of someone who I consider “dumber,” because honestly, there are a lot of people who aren't “intelligent” types, that do many things better than me, or someone who has skills that an academic doesn't have. We aren't required to like every kind of person. I would argue that your assumptions on sapiosexuality are very one-dimensional. It's incredibly shallow to think that someone who gets sexually aroused by intelligence is automatically narcissistic, because intelligence isn't the measure of someones worth.
Your videos are crack. I have work to do, yet I watch hours and hours of your videos on 3x speed, getting through an ungodly number in one night. Also, when I hear "sapiosexual," I run in the other direction. I, personally, am attracted to humility and beneficent, moderate stupidity (but not ignorance). You know, those people who insist that the world is good and don't need logic to convince them to be happy. I find this disposition to be extremely helpful because I feel that my moderately high intelligence has made me miserable. I'm not so smart that I've found life easy, but I'm also not so stupid as to be ignorant of this. I'm overly fixated on "productivity" and innovation; I can't just go to a beach to "enjoy myself" becuase, to me, the percieved purposelessness of such an act does not compute. You go to the beach for exposure that environment, to de-stress, to study something, to observe a phenomenon, et cetera; you don't just simply go. It doesn't make sense, and when a kind person who doesn't overthink things forces me to come along with them, I'm much happier as a result (though I also annoy them to death by pointing out and making observations on every last biogeochemical phenomenon I can and collecting specimens).
i must be living under a rock, never heard of this. If I heard someone saying that, i would be thinking that they have a "Nerd" fetish or something. Also, any "self reporting" study has to be taken with more than a few grains of salt.
WHAT?! That is NEVER what i mean! I experience attraction just like anyone else. But the attraction is so much stronger for me if said person is very smart; might find myself very attracted to someone that i found very unattractive at first, but as I see how crazy smart they are. Ex. fictional character Dr. Reid. IN NO WAY do I think I'm better than anyone or that Intelligence is more important, bc it's not! You can be the smartest person ever, if you are a jerk, it'd would NEVER happen.
I used to frequent a chat board community thing where members used neither their real namess nor pictures, and genders (and species) were somewhat fluid. I would develop crushes on individuals there practically daily, usually based on their wit, knowledgeability , ability to write short, humorous poetry in the correct form... *sigh* I miss that.
"Don't we all want someone is who is a bit better than us? That's just being a human." No, that's called being a woman. Women naturally select for someone who is a bit better than themselves. Women tend to date up or at their level, but not down
Dude being a sapiosexual is kinda off trend these days, but I do think I'm one. I've always thought I'm impotent. I'm 30, only had sex once and it was 10 years ago, barely felt any attraction toward it, rarely aroused, and I really had to come to terms with it. The only thing that bugs me is that all my tests came out fine, the swimmers do be swimmin, it's just me not feeling anything sexual. And then there came my now girlfriend. She studied psychology and business management, and as we talked about Jung my Junior just went up. It was pretty embarrassing and surprising as for the first time in my life I felt like I'm not broken. Really weird how Jung fix my wienie
Why is sexuality so important any way since it's only one aspect of the person. All of these different labels all to say the same thing, I like having sex with people you don't need to announce your sexual preference like it is it's own person with feelings.
Idk, man...I got turned on by someone for several times on several hot debates he and I had. I didn't tell him tho. I got hot and thrilled (I actually did lip bite---like a reflex---several times throughout our discussion). Those were steaming debate. Is that normal? Also, I have a solid crush on two dead people: (1) Beethoven, because of his mastery in music up to his "silent years"; and our former president Ferdinand Marcos, when I learned how he 'manipulated' the law and how he shifted the Philippine government. Is this normal?
Yeah it’s 100% normal to be attracted to people who have skills or characteristics you value, like, or enjoy. It’s 100% natural to be aroused by witnessing or engaging with those characteristics. It’s not unique. It’s not its own separate sexual orientation. Why do you think characters like Sherlock Holmes and Tony Stark are so attractive to people? Wit is hot to millions of people. You’re, far as I can tell based on your comment, a heterosexual woman. A woman attracted to men. Straight women aren’t inherently attracted to All Men, so you have preferences like every other human. Those preferences don’t seem to include brilliant women from history, so I’d guess gender trumps subjectively perceived intellectual prowess when it comes to your attractions. That’s run of the mill heterosexuality. I don’t get it. I would only ever date someone I felt mentally connected to, someone I could hold conversations with, etc. Why does that need its own word? Sapiosexuality is 100% subjective; it’s constrained to whatever type of intelligence an individual specifically is attracted to and values. Chess grand champion? Hot. A biologist specializing in scatology? Less hot. It’s all relative to the beholder. Y’all don’t need microlabels to differentiate your heterosexuality from someone else’s heterosexuality, and it’s weird af that people defend the word sapiosexual so vehemently when it’s such a nebulous phrase that it communicates nothing concrete to anyone but the user. Seems like people just want to say “I’m attracted to men! But...only smart men” is its own distinct sexuality when it really isn’t at all.
Never heard the term before, but I agree, it's dumb. Most well-adjusted people would rather have a partner who they consider "smart", by whatever metric they use. And I also agree that it's narcissistic. The implication of someone calling themselves "sapiosexual" is that they have a pretty high opinion of their own intelligence. I tend to be skeptical of people who like to advertise how smart, rational and logical they are because, from my experience with the atheist movement, that usually says a lot more about that person's ego than their intellectual abilities.
Sorry you feel that way. Good luck with that. I'm a happy go lucky Sapiosexual. If you want to call people narcissistic because of what attracts them I could only say I feel terrible for you lol.
A Sapiosexual doesn't grab a loudspeaker and shouts "I'm smarter than you" it's something that as an individual you feel when you interact with a beautiful airhead compare to an intellectual person. Jesus take the wheel
Is that how it works? Like I put down that I want a 'brunette' on my form, and apparently I will accept a brunette of any age, sex or sexual orientation. I mean, that's exactly what it means right? ohwaitno! I mean it's a dumb ass term, but that's not what they mean.
Yeah but you aren't calling yourself a brunettesexual. They are trying to say their attraction to intelligence is a sexual attraction similar to heterosexuality, bisexuality etc.
@Jim - Only* Because if it is a sexual orientation it should be the only thing. If it isn't actually a sexual orientation it doesn't warrant it's own name.
Who said it's an orientation? And why the fuck not have a name for it? It's descriptive of what you're attracted to which can be helpful for people, especially online. It just means you like nerds and that phrase is too wordy. So sapiosexual it is.
Rebecca, I think you're taking this term far too literally, as though viewing it through a lens of clinical pathology. It's not a 'condition' that people are diagnosed with. Nor is it a 'sexuality' (like homo-, hetero-, or bi -sexuality). It's not a kink, or fetish', either. In common parlance, it's just shorthand for: "I find smart women/ men more interesting and therfore more attractive," which is hardly rare, unusual, or shocking. (I've never met anyone who says they prefer a mate who's dumb or stupid). Most people don't describe their preferences by looking up 'disorders' in the DSM. Is the act of identifying as 'sapiosexual' a sign of narcissism? I doubt it. So, is it the act of declaring this preference to others, a narcissistic act? It depends. When seeking a date or future partner (on a dating site, for instance) should it be considered a red flag? Or just one clue listed among several other preferences? I think to say that this term means 'sexually aroused by intelligence' (to the exclusion of all other factors) is incorrect. It's one of many factors, like height, self-condidence or a sense of humour.
I'd never even heard the word before today. Then again, I avoid 'social media' like the plague. Of course, with my massive brain, I'd be swamped with sapiosexual fans otherwise, right? Who wants _that?_ :)
I identify as bisexual/queer. I would be more accurately defined as demisexual, not "wanting to have a partner who I have an emotional connection with" but "being sexually aroused mainly by people who I have an emotional connection with". My type happens to be (surprise surprise) kind, smart and witty people, not the rarest type to be attracted to. I don't feel sexual (or any) attraction to people who are not all of that and people who are not visually attractive to me become sexually attractive when they happen to have these traits. What I'm saying is that half the video, you miss the point. Sexuality is not just about "wanting to date certain type of people". A huge part of sexuality is feelings you cannot control, sexual and emotional attraction. People identifying as sapiosexual might just sincerely get it on with intelligent (whatever the definition that may be) people and have no physical reaction to people who are not. I think that sapiosexuality might very well be an actual thing, although it's definition leaves many things to be questioned, so does any other definition of sexuality as well. Maybe some people just have more picky genitals, I know mine is picky as fuck. Also to the comment I saw about sapiosexuals getting hot and bothered for Stephen Hawkin, does that mean that everyone who are attracted to men are gonna want to bone him as well? I think not.
I’m sapiosexual. I’m only attracted to sapients. Other animals just don’t do it for me.
Curtis006 had an octopus for a boyfriend, what an ass he was, but you shoulda seen the legs on him.
@@orsonzedd dear god
If my girlfriend had tentacles, and was mostly human, I would probably do everything she ever asked of me because you know, brain slugs
Curtis006
Sapient usually means high intelligence.
@@wschippr1 dont have octopus brains in their arms? 😂
@@RKYT0
Kind of, they have a ganglia in each arm. Which, at least colloquially, counts as a brain. I'm not sure if it meets a scientific definition of a brain, but I do know that Cephlapod intelligent evolved almost completely independently from vertebrate intelligence.
All I know is Im attracted to people with deep, openminded, curious, passionate thoughts.
Yeah same. And I think a man is sexiest when he shares his knowledge with me (I haven't had any experience of liking a girl ). I want a partner that can explore the world with me together.
@@jf5740 Do either of you two have a discord server I could meet you through? Or an alt account that I could add? (I wouldn't advise giving out a main account on here)
@@jf5740 This!! I identify with this. Someone who is curious, open minded, WANTS to understand something they don't, shares ideas and mental discoveries, explore and learn about the world through experiences. *swoon*
So… the real authentic them.
Gonna throw in my two cents here.. imagine thinking you have no libido until one day an intellectual debate floods your basement 😂
When I found this term I felt seen and represented. It’s not to say I’m smarter than anyone, it’s to say; I’m not a prude who doesn’t desire sex. Turns out, my body just responds sexually to intellectual stimulation.
Wait wait. So basically it’s all in YOUR head?
I've though of myself this way but I don't go around bragging about it. I base this on the fact that, while I am not sexually aroused by raw intelligence, I am turned off by dumb. I have found a person attractive, until I talked to them. I have also been more attracted to people once I learn more about them. I guess I've just been thinking about the term in a wrong/different way
I have quite similar feelings. Like what you said, I could be sexually aroused by people's appearance, while the thing is being dumb would easily ruin the feeling and turn me off. I don't see sapiosexual as an sexual-orientation but more like a type of personality. It's more like being a Gemini, Libra or Leo (if you believe zodiac signs).
it is the same way for me.
Damn, was looking for a video on actual Sapiosexuality but you’re just shaming people. Not everyone cares about intelligence, and it’s not just about being “smart.” It’s not being physically attracted to someone until you’ve understood their mind, getting turned on by science type or philosophical conversations, in a way that’s as exciting for other people like intimacy. You can accept a feet fetish but not a brain one? You can find the mind attractive and the body repulsive, and vice versa. I have met people I had no reason to like, other then they way they thought was sexy. You’ve really taken the time out of your day to judge what is attractive to someone else, which doesn’t seem attractive to anyone. Terms like this are important because I can let a partner know that it’s not so much body parts and identity yet, but that exploring the mind creates the physical sensations. This was just a judgmental rant on a singular case study and your personal experience. I don’t really care if people like you understand what it means, because at the end of the day someone else’s sexuality isn’t any of your business. Are we really still having this orientation conversation?
Fucking same... To be realistic where did the teacher kink come from? The lust for knowledge. I'm not necessarily physically attracted to old white women older black gentleman... But Neil deGrasse Tyson and Geena Davis (Virginia Elizabeth Davis) are two of the most attractive human beings in the world to me. I would literally do them both at the same time as long as we could have a conversation before or after. Both have IQs over 160 and are members of Mensa.
Agree she’s a hater
I thought zombies were turned on by brains.
Me Boo they must be sapiosexual lol
Guess what boo
This is something that was brought up to me in conversation i was told that he thought i was a sapiosexual and i never heard of the term i don't really fit into any label type.
All i know is that i am attracted to the person whom i'm talking withs brain over their visual appearance and not because i'm brainy it's quite the opposite i have a issue retaining information.
It's not their IQ either it's just the knowledge they've learned throughout life that i want to hear about to feel if we even have a connection chemistry.
That's exactly what real sapiosexualism is like, not all of the misconceptions she's helping spread. Another big sapiosexual thing is when you aren't initially attracted to someone, but after taking, and learning about them you realize how smart they are (not necessarily "math smart.") I don't think intelligence is that important in a partner, it's not! It's simply attractive to me.
Please do some good research and maybe 100% discard all of this garbage.
You mean studied knowledge or life experiences?
Sometimes I feel like the term “smart” carried a lot less weight when self-applied. Kind of like “nice” or “nice guy.”
If you call yourself these words vs if someone else calls you them. This makes a lot of difference.
Amen to that. I'd also add, "rational", "skeptical", and "logical" to that category of words. And I can think of a few political labels that have lost their weight in the same way too, like "liberal".
"Throughout my life, my two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart." - Donald Trump
Richard Head, based on your UA-cam channel, I know you're saying that as a dig against social justice, but you accidentally made a reasonable point. There have been instances of people who self-apply social justice labels (particularly with male feminists) who don't walk the walk even if they have the rhetoric down pat. That's mostly why I'm hesitant to call myself a feminist even though my political beliefs align with feminism; it feels presumptuous.
vitamindubya theres nothing wrong with me being confident about my intelligence
vitamindubya
I find that the reverse is true too though. For example, if someone says I’m smart, I am always like, “nah, I just read a lot and am curious about the world,” because I don’t consider myself of significant intelligence, they usually think that I am being condescending.
Shouldn't sapiosexuals consider Stephen Hawkings the sexist man alive?
I think it would have standards a spectrum of sorts, like how some people have a particular trait they prefer... but usually settle for less once a relationship begins to bud with that person. In other words yeah Hawking's papers may turn them on, but other traits like the robotic voice may be a turn off. Maybe Richard Dawkins? anyways there is a lot of traits that matter when describing the desires of a person, but the actual action of entering a relationship and progressing to other levels can deter from such selection; i.e. how some fawn over the appearance or sound of a particular movie star, but end up with less as they find someone who is compatible to them on a relationship level. I've known people who prefer short/tall partners, large/small [insert body part/s], a particular hair color/style, a particular skin tone, etc and up with more or less the opposite. I've even seen people who are adamant about their gender preferences and end up being with the opposite because the relationships they have is more important than just their personal desires.
Logical and mathematical isn't the only intelligence there is.
*He dead*
Nah.
I mean...in theory, even non-sapiosexuals could have considered Stephen Hawking incredibly sexy while he was alive. He was married two different times.
I use sapiosexual as a way of specifying that my sexual arousal is accessed through conversation and story telling in combination with touch while visual stimuli seems to be much less of a factor in my arousal than is common in most. Physical stimulation alone, or even with "vanilla conversation" is usually not enough to excite me. I'm a huge fan of story telling and roleplay in the bedroom and concepts I've applied to my partner are also a part of my primary sexual responses. I may experience an attraction to someone who is intelligent because of their interactions but that doesn't mean that I will find people attractive based on their IQ alone. Idk, maybe that's some sort of sapio/emosexual, maybe I have a tendency towards sapiosexuality and maybe mine is yet to be defined
Gobsmacked by your comment in a good way it made me smile from ear to ear it's the first time i've seen anyone describe it exactly how i feel,thank you for sharing :)
You like guys with social skills. That’s everyone.
So you like conversations with people you connect with, and are not turned on just by looking at a Random Hot Person? That’s how a lot of humans are..
Are you straight? Gay? Bi? Are conversation and storytelling equally arousing to you no matter the gender or appearance of the person? Or could it be that you are hetero-, homo-, bi-, or pansexual like every other human and also happen to have personality preferences for potential partners....like every other human...
@@randomnessiscool I mean... That is very reductionist... I doubt a lot of people like to have conversations WHILE having sex, and the physical act being a response to it.
Also, in my case I am bi, but it has nothing to do one with the other. They can be separate.
I feel is not ok to gatekeep sexualities. Don't You think maybe is better for everyone involved to have a word to describe it, so there are not surprises later?
I can completely relate to this.
Saying you are sapiosexual is not shallow or means you think your better. If you are naturally attracted to someone who is physically fit or sexy does that mean you are thinking your more physically fit or better yourself? No.
FYI: Rebecca, sapiosexuals women do exist, although some are not even aware of the term "sapiosexuals", because it is a relatively new term. They tend to be women who are aware of their intellectual limitations and seeking men with a brain. Even older women, who cannot procreate anymore, still are attractive to these kind of men. As a man, I've been "the receiving end", and my LTR have been with ladies who are attracted to intelligent men, regardless any catchy name like "sapiosexuals".
There are abusers in every preference category.its ok to be attracted to or put more weight on a person’s intellect and ability to hold a conversation than their extremities ie penis, bra size, weight. I know MANY people both men and women who care more about how hot a person is than whether or not they can hold a conversation, ESPECIALLY with the superficiality of the social media age we’re in.
I thought sapiosexual and other things like demisexual, were labels describing sexuality and not orientations. So someone can be bisexual but also sapiosexual. Or someone can be homosexual and only really develop sexual attraction when they form emotional connections to someone of the same sex.
yes.
So can I labeled myself as "badmintonsexual"?
Im a Sapiosexual and im not interested in this video. We are not ONLY attracted to intelligence. Its one of the qualities we admire in others because they stimulate our minds. We cant stand boredom.
But you are attracted to intelligence more than the other factors
Same..i meann looks do matter i dont want him to look like a frog but even if hes attractive the intellegance is what first catches my attention
Intellect is not only how many chess games someone had. Intellect is Social intellect, emotional intellect and academic intellect. Sociopaths are intelligent too. Psychopats are extraordinary smart. Most of serial killers scored IQ higer than 140. Sooooooo....sapiosexuality are not based only on how many books someone readed in life. Not at all. I can call it more like, intimate prefference, some are romantic, some are in bdsm, some like watch movies to be on "wave"😄. Some are turned on by someones individual intelligence, aka - how that person sees and explores the world. Long conversations about history, literature, or something else, makes that "bonding sparkle" 😌😏
I'm a non apologetic Sapiosexual. Non egotistical. Non narcissistic. I find intellectual people sexy, attractive and candidates for potentially a long term relationship.
Regardless of gender or appearance?
What is your definition of ‘intellectual’?
I'm sorry but there are so many things wrong with your video.
You hit the nail on the head.
I hate chess but I do sometimes get aroused by, as you said, slightly more attractive people, who are doing math. I always thought the term "sapiosexual" is just really pretentious though and thought of it as a kink. A math kink.
It starts with what you consider an intellect. Hell I'm sapiosexual because I love a man with good ole common sense🙂.
I hate that I am so late to this conversation as I am trying to figure out things myself. I consider myself to be a sapiosexual, but I don't think it is necessarily more narcissistic than normal sexual attraction. It can be superficial, most times it is. No matter how much physical stimulation there is, I cannot get aroused if there is not a conversation at the same time. Yes, it is VERY weird to be engaged in a sexual activity and suddenly ask the other person about a controversial political opinion. It really doesn't matter what the topic is... If they can talk passionately about it it's enough. In my case, it is not about feeling smart. It is because I don't feel smart enough. I think is the same as feeling good when you have sex with someone who is more attractive. If there is another term for it I will gladly use it, but I kind of need a way to tell people what to expect... Before it happens.
Generally I call myself Sapiosexuals jokingly, for the reasons said in this vid, but I am extremely attracted to intelligence. I mean the mere contemplation of my ex girlfriend in and of itself would excite me. She was cute yes, but her critical thinking in and of itself was by a million miles what I was attracted to. but calling myself sapiosexual would be cringe
Most people want to being in relationship with inteligent person. But, for sapiosexual, inteligence is the centre of relationship
Hell Yeah! So glad someone said this. It's the worst thing to see on a profile.
Thought it was just a type, some like emos, some suits, some bohemians, some glasses, some ravenclaws, some rebel punks etc
It is just a type..its not narcisistic one can be dumb as hell but like smart guys
This is a vapid analysis of sapiosexuality and makes the very binary assumption that intelligence is the ONLY thing to which sapiosexuals are attracted. Hint: it's not. Calling yourself a sapiosexual merely means that intelligence is more important to you than it might be to other people - that you put more weight on it than other features of sexual attraction. That doesnt' seem all that narcissistic or arrogant to me, but if you want to create a false controversy because you don't have something better to vlog about, then why not interpret this form of sexuality in the most simplistic way possible and then throw everyone who subscribes to it under the bus. This is pretty bush league stuff from Rebecca to be honest because I normally love her. Also, if you're eating up this vlog without questioning it and agreeing that sapiosexuals are the spawn of satan then I'm pretty sure you aren't what sapiosexuals are looking for anyway.
people also say
"everyone is demisexual"
and that demisexuals just wanna feel superior.
but no. i don't think being demisexual makes me superior to anyone. my sexuality is involuntary like anyone else's.
so when someone says that their sexuality depends on mental stimulation, i take their word for it. maybe they're lying or mistaken, but who cares? it doesn't hurt anything to take their word, just like i want people to take my word on my sexuality (and similarly on my gender).
I didn’t know that it was thing. Intelligent people are a turn on for me and I think the most important sexual trait.
She is very closed minded
@@jovanakostencova1813 felt the same thing. Which is absolutely the opposite of being an intellect.
It's supposed to be a type and not a sexuality. Is there supposed to be a sexuality for people who prefer emo partners? Hell no. This kind of "sexuality" is exactly what hinders the acceptance of the lgbt+ community.
I doubt anyone is completely sapiosexual, with no other kinds of attraction. However, I think it's one of the ingredients that can go into who we're attracted to. Myself, I was largely asexual in my teens and early twenties when, according to pop culture you're "supposed to" be highly sexual. That's likely where the seeds of my sapiosexuality were sown. As I did experience sexual attraction, sapiosexuality was one of the things I would look for. Remember the character Dr. Brenner, played by Emily Deschanel, in the TV show Bones? I found I was very much attracted to her, who is both attractive in appearance and quite intellectual. Similarly, if someone is attractive in appearance but has a bad personality I find it a total turnoff. That's it, don't bother passing go and don't collect $200.
I don't follow them at all, but supposedly the Kardashians are attractive. They don't have anything worthwhile to say and do absolutely nothing for me. I find far more attraction even in older women who are interesting such as Ruth Goodman, about 60 years old, who has been in many interesting BBC documentary shows.
You begin by saying how the phenomenon of being a sapiosexual is narcissistic and stupid. Then you go on to say “as a sapiosexual” which is 😂. I am not sure how much research was done into this phenomenon of being a sapiosexual when you had created this video, but, cherry picking a study conducted that was clearly as you say badly conducted and how it “could have been great” does not signify that the phenomenon is bollocks, it only signifies that BETTER studies need to be conducted to either prove or disprove this phenomenon. I have read a few studies recently and In conclusion having a strong sexual attraction to say a male of higher intellect had a biologically linked motive being that “intelligent men produce healthier sperm” which is a determinant of reproductive success.
Intelligence is a spectrum and mainly meaning the person and energy that is the person as whole and what you can learn about them to understand and study them as one should be it’s just marveling at them for who they are as a person and all the possibilities of your personalities and having a love to learn this isn’t all bad but I think it’s very misunderstood when I was young no one knew what is was and I wouldn’t even bother telling them back in 2006 in the south if I can’t stay up all night talking about random facts and learning more about one another out side by a fire kinda thing why are we even friends
intelligence is diverse and it can be for specific topics. i am sapiosexual and my form of intelligence is creativity and puzzles (game and real life)
This video has so many incorrect assumptions. Many people are turned on by those less intelligent than them and exclusively date or even marry people with a lower IQ. The video is basically saying it's okay to be a little bit of something but impossible to be a lot of something. I just don't get the logic.
I was domestically/sexually abused by someone who when we first met called them self this, in hindsight i consider its use a red flag that someone is trying to disarm me toward otherwise inappropriate sexual advances down the line and ingratiate themselves with me quickly, both behaviours when mixed together being the foundation Grooming can take place.
A real Sapiosexual wouldn't put it out there that he or she is a sapio. He or she will just be more engaged to a person who displays intellect in a number of spectrum.
Btw I hope the person who abuse you rots in hell
I think there are sapiosexuals who put it out there that they are sapiosexuals
@Richard Head For what reason? Why you gonna be a douche?
Furst time hearing about that term but the way u explaned i guess i am a sapiosexual
*0:40* okay no.We dont say that liking someone for appearacne is shallow and that were better and smarter and thats why we like intellegante people.The sexy part is how in a room of people he/she could OWN it by being smart and getting everyones attention.We just like it when a guy isnt like "ohh pftt im gonna study? ThAts fOr loSeRs and uGlY NERDSS" and is proud and can show the things he can do or the things hes good at.It doesnt have to be math of smt it can be the love of sport and knowing a lot about it,the love for computers or anything.Its about being different and not being ashamed about telling the world about it.We dont were better for liking intellegnet guys..it just..is sexier to us
Also one can be dumb and like smart guys so it has nothing to do with being narcisistic
Bruh no i can not masturbate to someone talking and looks do matter a bit but the smartness is what first catches our attention and it impresses us.I dont wantt to belive i like intellegance more i just saw that every of my previous crushes are ones that share the interest in math/physics (or being intellegante in general and has his own interests) and doesnt think of anything as too difficult and immposible.Doesnt mean i like every guy whos smart i do care about looks but if hes dumb and has no interest in things and is closed minded..he aint it
Hey No disrespect. But i think you are taking the definition too literal. The “SapioSexuals should be able to get off by watching a chess match” was a goofy analogy because i believe for SapioSexuals; intelligence is a major ELEMENT that is not required but extremely preferred when pertaining to arousal. I am attracted to women. But that doesn’t mean i can just watch ANY women undress herself and feel arousal. There are more elements that go into the act of being aroused. You can be intelligent but be a smart ass which is a turn off for me. Just how i am attracted to women but not obese women. Because that’s gross..to me. There is more to it then just intelligence. It’s almost like the female anatomy being the Cocktail. The intelligence being the perfect amount of alcohol. And the physical appearance being the salt rim + the garnish + everything else that makes the drink actually taste good. Smart ass women taste more like Ever-clear. Sure it’ll stimulate my mind but the intake will not be enjoyable and i’ll have to force myself to go through with it. But that’s me. I can drink most cocktails but only the ones made the right way can really stimulate my mind. Leaving me in a hypotonic state almost. Possibly even change my life. Might mess around and find my favorite drink that gets me every time.
Oh my god this comment is gold. ✔🌹🌹
This is total BS, what the hell ?
Excellent analysis, I too believe that studying more of the biological factors on this would give it more support. GREAT POST.
I haven’t taken the time to identify with any particular sexuality. I appreciate your points and agree with all of them. I am hoping and expecting that sapoisexualism is a real thing. I can’t prove anything to you, and that’s not what I’m here to do, but I can say that my arousal based on things like looks and kindness is the same as when someone is lecturing about Chemistry and is really passionate about it. Now, I do know that I am immensely intelligent and intellectual (it’s a fact; I don’t need to call my self a sapiosexual or anything else to prove it), and I do know that intelligent people often feel very lonely in their perception and experience of the world, so perhaps the legitimate “sapiosexual” is more of a manifestation of they’re longing for someone like themselves, for normal camaraderie. In this case you’d be correct in saying that it shouldn’t be it’s own sexuality bc it’s not entirely independent of other sexualities. (Unless of course it is, but in the current hypothetical case it’s not.) Perhaps it’s the same as if someone really appreciated music or wilderness survival or whatever and they wanted to share that with someone; it’s just that the hobby here would be something involving “advanced intellect.” The only thing is I’m not entirely sure how the actual sexual component itself (as opposed to platonic intimacy) would play into that. I get that a lot of people wanna sound cooler or feel better about themselves in saying that they are intelligent or like intelligent people or activities or whatever, but some people are actually especially intelligent and just like people of different sports, mental illnesses, sexualities, hobbies, whatever, they too face their own set of gifts and struggles in society, with which it sounds like you agree. A lot to think about. Thanks for the good vid.
I'm an Asexual Sapioromamtic...
I didn't know people got turned on... _by anything-_
I don't think I'm better than others, I don't _Value_ Intelligence, I value someone who I can be with. Tho I only feel attraction when I think someone is smart. I don't really care.
They are usually just ableist and classists who don't want to be critical of their own attitudes.
And the reward for the stupidest comment of this century goes to....
Insecure much?
...goes to Jim Beam
Also, I deliberately want a partner who ain't too smart because I feel like that which we humans consider "intelligence" misses something fundamental about the purposelessness of life by constructing a sort of teleological cult of constant human improvement. I'd rather keep the long, protracted ontological-epistemological debates to my friends than risk bringing them into my household.
My issue with this video is that it compartmentalizes sexual identities. Sexual orientations and attractions are muti layered. You can be gay, bi, or pan and also sapiosexual. I also would like to add that this could also describe people who need deep intellectual stimulation to be aroused. This feels like it's attraction shaming.
Not to be confused by people turned on by Zombies.
I know that below average intelligence in a partner causes me to lose a lot of interest. It’s a big turn off for me.
Small talk and regular conversations with a partner day after day causes me to become unbelievably bored. I really need intellectual stimulation from my partner. Based on my understanding it has very little to do with sexual orientation… I’m straight and just like girls who can give me the mental stimulation I need. The most fun and interesting experiences with women in my life have been with the more intelligent women regardless of how attractive they were compared to others in my life.
Couldnt find my kind, ended up with a fallen angel who has the wisdom of the ages, now we're talking! Lol but seriously, these kind of people do exist.
Does it count as being sapiosexual if you are immediately turned off by someone you think is otherwise gorgeous, if they start talking or writing and turn out to be an idiot? That's kind of how I always viewed this term - as an attraction factor that rides alongside primary attraction to their sex or gender or whatever.
I've fallen for many girls whom I've thought of as being very smart...
I wasn't sexually aroused .It was more like the attraction you get for someones face...
What I mean is for example being facially attracted doesn't equate to wanting to having sex.
If I find a woman attactive I want to dive deep in her mind and talk to her more about how she conceptualizes the world.
Learning something new is always a where the gems are.
This eventually gets me to finding her sexually attactive.
When I told this one girl I have a pattern of falling for intelligent woman she told me I was a sapiosexual.
But this video has made very skeptical😅
I’m Sapiophilia , I’m very attracted to the guy with highly intelligent and a guy with glasses 😂, it’s hard to explain, when the guy who has and have Highly intelligent, I’m very focusing of their words ,how they’re deep words, their brain,its kinda hard to explain, when they become sarcastic, I just cannot help it, and all of their words have meaning and how they explain. Most men I dated they asked me what kind of guy I’m looking for, and my answer is intelligent lol I know it’s weird but that’s honest 😂😂 and my favorite movie is Sherlock, puzzle movie, figuring out movie , I dated a Doctor who have highly intelligent, and a lawyer it’s kinda fun to have debate with them sometimes, and I end up marrying a guy who have high IQ .😂
Hi Rebecca! I enjoyed your video and I think you presented it very professionally! I am a sapiophile but not narcissist, just more attracted to someone that can have an intelligent conversation, can stand up for themselves, great ideas and opinions, etc... If a person lacked emotional intelligence or stimulating communication, I couldn't go to the next level, even if I was physically attracted to them. I think you are a very intelligent person due to how you presented this video. You might be a closet sapiophile, you just haven't come out yet.
Being a sapiosexual has nothing to do with feeling like you're better than someone; it's just someone attracted to intellectual people. I don't think any less of someone who I consider “dumber,” because honestly, there are a lot of people who aren't “intelligent” types, that do many things better than me, or someone who has skills that an academic doesn't have. We aren't required to like every kind of person. I would argue that your assumptions on sapiosexuality are very one-dimensional. It's incredibly shallow to think that someone who gets sexually aroused by intelligence is automatically narcissistic, because intelligence isn't the measure of someones worth.
I have to be attracted to the person not just physically but, mentally:)
Your videos are crack. I have work to do, yet I watch hours and hours of your videos on 3x speed, getting through an ungodly number in one night.
Also, when I hear "sapiosexual," I run in the other direction. I, personally, am attracted to humility and beneficent, moderate stupidity (but not ignorance). You know, those people who insist that the world is good and don't need logic to convince them to be happy. I find this disposition to be extremely helpful because I feel that my moderately high intelligence has made me miserable. I'm not so smart that I've found life easy, but I'm also not so stupid as to be ignorant of this. I'm overly fixated on "productivity" and innovation; I can't just go to a beach to "enjoy myself" becuase, to me, the percieved purposelessness of such an act does not compute. You go to the beach for exposure that environment, to de-stress, to study something, to observe a phenomenon, et cetera; you don't just simply go. It doesn't make sense, and when a kind person who doesn't overthink things forces me to come along with them, I'm much happier as a result (though I also annoy them to death by pointing out and making observations on every last biogeochemical phenomenon I can and collecting specimens).
Oh, and let's not forget....r/gatekeeping
i must be living under a rock, never heard of this. If I heard someone saying that, i would be thinking that they have a "Nerd" fetish or something. Also, any "self reporting" study has to be taken with more than a few grains of salt.
Me, neither. But then, I _have_ been living under a rock - every since the 2016 election, in fact. It's nice and peaceful down here. :)
Bill Garthright sometimes I wish I was a complete ascetic tbh haha. May be an extreme thought, but can't help it sometimes.
Being a nerd and being intellegent are two very dufferent things
WHAT?! That is NEVER what i mean! I experience attraction just like anyone else. But the attraction is so much stronger for me if said person is very smart; might find myself very attracted to someone that i found very unattractive at first, but as I see how crazy smart they are. Ex. fictional character Dr. Reid.
IN NO WAY do I think I'm better than anyone or that Intelligence is more important, bc it's not! You can be the smartest person ever, if you are a jerk, it'd would NEVER happen.
Yeah, I always got the sense that “sapiosexuality” is more about trying to look superior to others than anything else.
Yes, just like elitism/ableism
"I love you Rebecca.." Newgrounds! xD XD
I recently met someone whose brain and every word was so sexy to me that it is like he turned on a light somewhere in the depths of my soul.
1:04 uh no. Everyone is different. You are a very judgmental woman.
does that turn you on
@RebeccaWatson does what turn me on? Was that meant to be a burn..or..
I used to frequent a chat board community thing where members used neither their real namess nor pictures, and genders (and species) were somewhat fluid. I would develop crushes on individuals there practically daily, usually based on their wit, knowledgeability , ability to write short, humorous poetry in the correct form...
*sigh* I miss that.
"Don't we all want someone is who is a bit better than us? That's just being a human."
No, that's called being a woman. Women naturally select for someone who is a bit better than themselves. Women tend to date up or at their level, but not down
Thank youuuuuuuu
I guess it just means being attracted by girls with glasses.
Welma
If your moon sign is air in your natural chart, you express your emotional needs through intellect.🙄No one thinks their better ma’am.
Dude being a sapiosexual is kinda off trend these days, but I do think I'm one. I've always thought I'm impotent. I'm 30, only had sex once and it was 10 years ago, barely felt any attraction toward it, rarely aroused, and I really had to come to terms with it. The only thing that bugs me is that all my tests came out fine, the swimmers do be swimmin, it's just me not feeling anything sexual. And then there came my now girlfriend. She studied psychology and business management, and as we talked about Jung my Junior just went up. It was pretty embarrassing and surprising as for the first time in my life I felt like I'm not broken. Really weird how Jung fix my wienie
All the time on tinder
I think you’re confused and projecting 😅
I’m hoping this turns around 🤣 that first half was a little rough 🙏 but I’m enjoying this 🥲🌹
Why is sexuality so important any way since it's only one aspect of the person. All of these different labels all to say the same thing, I like having sex with people you don't need to announce your sexual preference like it is it's own person with feelings.
I / e .... If you cant figure that out i am
I learned a new word. Rest of video comes across as negative and closed minded.
Darrell Blake Very closed minded
Idk, man...I got turned on by someone for several times on several hot debates he and I had. I didn't tell him tho. I got hot and thrilled (I actually did lip bite---like a reflex---several times throughout our discussion). Those were steaming debate. Is that normal?
Also, I have a solid crush on two dead people: (1) Beethoven, because of his mastery in music up to his "silent years"; and our former president Ferdinand Marcos, when I learned how he 'manipulated' the law and how he shifted the Philippine government. Is this normal?
Yeah it’s 100% normal to be attracted to people who have skills or characteristics you value, like, or enjoy. It’s 100% natural to be aroused by witnessing or engaging with those characteristics. It’s not unique. It’s not its own separate sexual orientation. Why do you think characters like Sherlock Holmes and Tony Stark are so attractive to people? Wit is hot to millions of people. You’re, far as I can tell based on your comment, a heterosexual woman. A woman attracted to men. Straight women aren’t inherently attracted to All Men, so you have preferences like every other human. Those preferences don’t seem to include brilliant women from history, so I’d guess gender trumps subjectively perceived intellectual prowess when it comes to your attractions. That’s run of the mill heterosexuality.
I don’t get it. I would only ever date someone I felt mentally connected to, someone I could hold conversations with, etc. Why does that need its own word? Sapiosexuality is 100% subjective; it’s constrained to whatever type of intelligence an individual specifically is attracted to and values. Chess grand champion? Hot. A biologist specializing in scatology? Less hot. It’s all relative to the beholder. Y’all don’t need microlabels to differentiate your heterosexuality from someone else’s heterosexuality, and it’s weird af that people defend the word sapiosexual so vehemently when it’s such a nebulous phrase that it communicates nothing concrete to anyone but the user. Seems like people just want to say “I’m attracted to men! But...only smart men” is its own distinct sexuality when it really isn’t at all.
oops, focus
Your entitled to your opinion.
Your rhetoric is lacking.
Never heard the term before, but I agree, it's dumb. Most well-adjusted people would rather have a partner who they consider "smart", by whatever metric they use.
And I also agree that it's narcissistic. The implication of someone calling themselves "sapiosexual" is that they have a pretty high opinion of their own intelligence. I tend to be skeptical of people who like to advertise how smart, rational and logical they are because, from my experience with the atheist movement, that usually says a lot more about that person's ego than their intellectual abilities.
Sorry you feel that way. Good luck with that. I'm a happy go lucky Sapiosexual. If you want to call people narcissistic because of what attracts them I could only say I feel terrible for you lol.
A Sapiosexual doesn't grab a loudspeaker and shouts "I'm smarter than you" it's something that as an individual you feel when you interact with a beautiful airhead compare to an intellectual person. Jesus take the wheel
Is that how it works? Like I put down that I want a 'brunette' on my form, and apparently I will accept a brunette of any age, sex or sexual orientation. I mean, that's exactly what it means right? ohwaitno!
I mean it's a dumb ass term, but that's not what they mean.
Yeah but you aren't calling yourself a brunettesexual. They are trying to say their attraction to intelligence is a sexual attraction similar to heterosexuality, bisexuality etc.
Umm...no. That's NOT what they're saying. It just means that intelligence is the most attractive feature for them.
@Jim - Only*
Because if it is a sexual orientation it should be the only thing. If it isn't actually a sexual orientation it doesn't warrant it's own name.
Who said it's an orientation? And why the fuck not have a name for it? It's descriptive of what you're attracted to which can be helpful for people, especially online. It just means you like nerds and that phrase is too wordy. So sapiosexual it is.
I haven’t heard of this before. It’s fucking hilarious! 😂
Rebecca, I think you're taking this term far too literally, as though viewing it through a lens of clinical pathology. It's not a 'condition' that people are diagnosed with. Nor is it a 'sexuality' (like homo-, hetero-, or bi -sexuality). It's not a kink, or fetish', either.
In common parlance, it's just shorthand for: "I find smart women/ men more interesting and therfore more attractive," which is hardly rare, unusual, or shocking. (I've never met anyone who says they prefer a mate who's dumb or stupid).
Most people don't describe their preferences by looking up 'disorders' in the DSM.
Is the act of identifying as 'sapiosexual' a sign of narcissism? I doubt it. So, is it the act of declaring this preference to others, a narcissistic act? It depends. When seeking a date or future partner (on a dating site, for instance) should it be considered a red flag?
Or just one clue listed among several other preferences?
I think to say that this term means 'sexually aroused by intelligence' (to the exclusion of all other factors) is incorrect. It's one of many factors, like height, self-condidence or a sense of humour.
I am amuse
I'd never even heard the word before today. Then again, I avoid 'social media' like the plague.
Of course, with my massive brain, I'd be swamped with sapiosexual fans otherwise, right? Who wants _that?_ :)
Next vilify the attraction to sense of humour, and I can rightly resign myself from the gene pool.
I identify as bisexual/queer. I would be more accurately defined as demisexual, not "wanting to have a partner who I have an emotional connection with" but "being sexually aroused mainly by people who I have an emotional connection with". My type happens to be (surprise surprise) kind, smart and witty people, not the rarest type to be attracted to. I don't feel sexual (or any) attraction to people who are not all of that and people who are not visually attractive to me become sexually attractive when they happen to have these traits.
What I'm saying is that half the video, you miss the point. Sexuality is not just about "wanting to date certain type of people". A huge part of sexuality is feelings you cannot control, sexual and emotional attraction. People identifying as sapiosexual might just sincerely get it on with intelligent (whatever the definition that may be) people and have no physical reaction to people who are not.
I think that sapiosexuality might very well be an actual thing, although it's definition leaves many things to be questioned, so does any other definition of sexuality as well. Maybe some people just have more picky genitals, I know mine is picky as fuck.
Also to the comment I saw about sapiosexuals getting hot and bothered for Stephen Hawkin, does that mean that everyone who are attracted to men are gonna want to bone him as well? I think not.
You’re so condescending wow
Your opinion may be correct, but it wasn't pursuasive. I assume this video was made sort of off the cuff without a lot of thought.
Ll
wow a Rebecca Watson vid that is actually smart! Ironically refreshing.