This is literal for me. I just can’t wait to go home and sleep. I have hobbies yes but besides that I have a nice job that pays well but ion wanna be around these ppl and it’s draining. Ion have a gf either so it’s just me. Sleep is a comfort for me or going to the gym too. That relieves stress too
Yep. I feel a sudden rush of severe depression now understanding my predicament as a 30 year old virgin loner loser that missed out on his entire youth. It’s so much pain the realization of what the frick happened to lead to such a horrible life situation and the obstacle to overcome it feels so much larger then it did when at 18. 3 year timer for me. 33 years old and I will check out if my life hasn’t started yet
You will lose 99 percent of your friends, there is nothing tragic about this, it's normal. People will start families and focus on their kids as they should. Most guys I know who chased friendships were left behind.
"Friends" don't do much but work anyway. The ones that don't just drink and play vids :) Both are bored to death with their lives at 25 so there's no real point in talking to them anyway. People are losers.
@@devilsoffspring5519Also, friends are nice to have but they're something that happen along the way, they're not the main focus and people who make them their main focus will suffer greatly.
I acutally can´t understand this perspective. Focus on your family and your wife will get bored soon because you´re so much around her and don´t keep contact with your bros anymore. You need a group of friends that will support you when divorce happens.
@@DerCheker10 probably because you're in your twenties still. When you're a (responsible) father, your main focus becomes your work and your kids. And your wife's as well.
man i know it sounds fake but im in this exact situation..i dont have anything in common with the people my age anymore and i have become lonely cause i dont have anything to talk about with them so i just dont anymore...been like this for 3 years now..i only talk to my family and so many people judge me for it..call me im not social ,weird etc etc... this video came as a blessing ..now i know its part of the proccess and it will get better
I'm also the same. This is going to be a trend. Everyone wants peace and nobody can get it in those damn a$$ night clubs and fancy a$$ expensive lounges in them skyscrapers.
I think being lonely is a choice tbh. You don't have to drink alcohol at a bar, you can leave nightclubs at 1am instead of 4am, you can limit gaming to 1 hour. You can be decent enough to text friends back even if you're busy. People skip out on being social because of self-imposed walls
It’s a long but very rewarding journey. I’ve got about 7 classes left to graduate and also work in an investment firm on the side to make money. Make sure to take your time and prioritize your mental health and well-being. Rooting for you pal
25-30 is the most difficult age. You lose a lot of friends, you hit reality, you start to figure out what the hell you are gonna do with your life but in the end, you will become stronger and wiser. ❤
27. I moved to another city at 25 to accelerate my career and had to start over socially. I still have no friends, mostly because I work so much and spend a lot of time in the gym. Also, It’s hard to find friends you’re compatible with when you become more successful than everyone else your age. The majority of people, as well as my friends back home, just work average jobs, hangout with the same friend group at the same bars, never do anything new, etc. I never would have expected to struggle this much with loneliness but I guess it comes with the territory.
Reminds me of my situation a while back. I had a flying start to my career, moving to London at 21. But by 26, it all felt meaningless. I felt like I hadn't lived life at all, just worked and studied for all of it. The lack of freedom became unbearable. I switched to contracting recently and only worked half of this past year. It's made life more enjoyable, but it isn't really a long-term solution. I was only able to do it because I'm single with no responsibilities. I feel like this is the downside of careers. You earn well and live a good lifestyle while in the job, but the minute you leave that club, there's a timer ticking until you inevitably have to go back. You have to stay grinding at a high level for 30 years or more. I have to find an alternative because I ain't built for that.
@jawlig If you are a higher earner you can make investments so you don't have to keep going back. Easier said than done but it'll create the free time that you need
Older man here. This video and message resonates with me. Part of the issue is as we "level up," we prioritize what gave us a measure a success. As such, our standards have changed. Not that I'm better than my old friends, I've just learned to embrace this new season in my life. Today, I have maybe one or two close friends left. BUT, I've gained colleagues in my profession. Sacrifices are necessary, but the rewards are worth it.
Loneliness comes from thinking you're either better than or not good enough for others. It's a mind trap that both rich and poor fail to overcome. That's why it's good to get a hobby that spans across multiple levels of socio-economic classes. I recommend basketball and Warhammer
Totally disagree. If you "level up" and end up alone, maybe take a look inward. Likely it's a "you" problem, not that everyone else is just jealous or not on your level. A lot of people use "leveling up" as an excuse to neglect connections in their life and become a bit of a pretentious dickhead.
I agree, you can become extremely successful and still sympathize with your friends and understand them. Yes, you could be not benefitting a lot from them but you don't have to ditch them. You could even help them.
So true, this neglect is often not realized until it is too late. Relationship and brotherhood is vital! Instead of leveling up behind the scenes, make your friends join the gym with you or change the scenery from hanging out at bars and clubs to something positive. There is enough time to hangout and be serious about your career/health. Imagine how much less time you'll have when you got children 😅
THIS ONE Im not saying smoking and binge drinking or letting your family peer pressure you isn't a BAD thing but if you "level up" and constantly point out other peoples flaws and that they haven't leveled up like you you just become a pretentious jerkwad. Not everyone needs to min max their life Best physique Best job Best everything Like bro some people are just living life lol
I totally agree. Meeting these kinds of people where you meet up with to do a business venture, then they totally ditch you and throw you under the bus because they see you as a 'risk to their business' like they didn't invite you in the first place? Now, that's a dickhead
Being lonely is much better than being around people who never truly had your best interests at heart. Give up your need for assurance and love from other people
its really not man. You only chose loneliness because its easy, dealing with people is hard but pushing through that and finding people that understand and love you is the only way you'll ever be content in life. That feeling of lonelyness that you feel if you isolate and push people away will only ever get stronger. Dont poison yourself with this grindset shit you're really going to regret it
Dude just go out… Partying was one of the most beneficial things I ever did for my mental health. I dont understand why having a full time job all of a sudden means you can’t have fun on the weekend.
Sometimes its like they want the grind mindset and then want to double down and absolutely remove any chance of getting a dopamine hit during their "grind" and then they wonder why they're depressed.
nobody judges you. most people dont give a shit about anybody else. the reason why you get isolated is because you develop a big head from box ticking consumer goals and believing you are getting ahead. then you become salty because no one is clapping for you, like you expected. if you keep going out, socialising in real life and online, and don't expect that you will suddenly be surrounded by a list celebs coz you work out twice a week, you will realise that nothing has changed and your friends are still your friends.
"tall poppy syndrome" is why my girlfriend and I might have broken up. As our relationship went on, I started taking my future more serious and started working towards goals. Started working out etc and my ex since 2 months ago broke up because we started to "differ too much" (both of us still had the same interests as we always had) and "I laid too much pressure on her" while I was out there working overtime to make sure she could study (which she failed) with as little pressure as possible. She broke up on my 25th birthday exactly. Started dating some dude from her job 2 weeks after we broke up. Works part-time as well at 25 and is where I was when she and I met. We also met at our jobs. She's back to life exactly before we had a relationship, no improvements made to herself over 4 years realistically.
really feel that man, i broke up 2 months ago, she was falling deep in the rabbithole of video game addiction(16h/day) and i couldn't take it just watching her, started working out and eating healthy, that alienated us and she decided to pick the game over me, refused my offers of therapy and moved out , we were 3 years together and married, it ended just like that, tall poppy syndrome accompanied by addictions, i couldn't help a person who refuses help. :(
Sucks she did that on your 25th birthday. I had a similar situation not long after my 25th. She’s doing f all now in the same town, with the same loser people. You’ve surpassed her my man. Sounds like you’re doing well.
@@LukeyB777 I had a gf who knew I had a birthday coming up (my 25th) and she as on vacation at the time. I told her to at least call me on my birthday. well guess what. my birthday came and not even a single phone call. Just a pathetic 3 few word happy birthday text. I snapped and broke up with her immediately. I could already feel like it was over before anyway. But that was the nail in the coffin for me and a solid reason. Needless to say she died a year or so later. OD'd and with a guy she was with too. So 2 deaths. Crazy thing is she died on her birthday. What would be her 26th I believe.
This is a load of bs, you're talking about one dudes experience yet you’re acting like you have unlocked the key to life. There are always opportunities for new friends
I’m 26 but I am glad I got this wonderful message on time. I’m going to be honest with you guys. Last year, before I turned 25, I thought my circle was legit because I got promotion on my job, my money increased, my mind changed and all of it. The people in my circle were coworkers and one buddy from my high school. A year later, that one buddy from my high school stood around. Everyone else I have to end that relationships with them. Why is that? Well, the keyword I mentioned before was Coworker. Coworkers are associates. Now, Idk how certain people was able to pull off a healthy friendship with a coworker outside of their job and stick with them long term. You gotta have a connection with that person and something in common because if you don’t, you’ll end up getting the same results. You guys keep your head up. Everything will be alright. Just trust the lord and he’ll show you the way. Y’all stay strong now. Wish you all the best of Grace
Damn, man. This explains my situation almost exactly. I gave up partying and started going hard in my career and my health and fitness. Now, I'm struggling to find groups and things to do in order to meet new people and potentially find a woman to spend my time (and maybe, hopefully the rest of my life) with. I'm gonna check out your free content and maybe join socializer. Love your videos. They remind me I am not the only one going through this part of life. Thanks
What feels almost worse is being 31 almost 32 and being in the same point as I was at 25. I'm the one who never has anything going on and always wants to hang out, while all the friends around me have moved on and are doing other things.
Well that should tell you to work on self find a new skill to accomplish. Find things or goals to achieve quit smoking for a while & go to the gym instead. Gotta want better for yourself and just put in the work
@@KenGlo All this advice is so generic like your giving a 17yo advice tho just say you don't know what to say and move on. Many guys already go to the gym and work and not everyone has some career progression to move into 6 figures their just land locked based on their job unless they completely reskill into a brand new skill which would cost thousands in loans.
@@MrFrankEast that’s your perception whoever you are I was just encouraging him but whatever floats your boat….🤣 you internet warriors always got some negative shit to say get tf on with that negative shit bruh and have a good day
Been there before and I’d say try talking to older men with knowledge ask questions on things your uncertain of & apply it to your life. I’ve always felt the same way and still do but don’t let that stop me from wanting to learn or listen to people that been here longer than me & are doing well in life. Keep faith in god & be willing to listen & learn from different people on your journey god bless 🙏🏾
Find yourself a purpose that will make you enough money to live on - at a minimum. If it can make you a millionaire, even better. Having a purpose will solve 90% of your problems
A lot of the problems you are describing are unique to men in 2024. It’s tough times for us in a society where we aren’t valued as much. My number 1 recommendation to stay level headed is to be balanced in all aspects of life. Gym/cardio at lest 5 days a week. Eat well, no sugar or grease. Spend a day or two with family. Spend a day or two with friends. Don’t over invest in women, I’ve seen a lot of my friends go down from this. Don’t over invest in a job or money because it is always out of your control most the time. Just a few things.
its ironic cause , the most man are terrified cause they thinking that never ever are gonna meet girls hahaha , and one of your advice is "don't over invest in women" , i think that its about carisma , its about how you feel lonely and if you believe that you are gonna get wones, friends or warever
This hits home man I just turned 26 started earning six figures for the first time in my life and feels lonelier than ever. I put over 8 months of work with countless of sleepless nights to get where I am right now and definitely lost quite a few friends and relationships in the process. I just started hanging out with the an older group of friends over discord and they're still doing the same thing, playing video games, watching anime and it feels like I'm not able to relate any more. I still enjoy those hobbies in moderation, but focused on a lot more deadlines I've set for myself so that I don't need to grind as hard in my 50s in the future. I'm trying to balance it out with things I enjoy, but curious on everyone else's perspective.
If you are 26 and earning 6 figures, congratulations you have done very well and should be proud. If I was you, I would try to be in a room where I am the stupidest and not the smartest.
Playing video games and watching anime is a relatively wallet friendly form of comfort and peace of mind after a long hard days work nothing wrong with it
You on the right path bro, stick with it you'll figure it out. Remember that the grind mindset can also be applied to relationships and meeting new people and making new friends, not just making money
I know exactly what this feeling is like. I had to move to a different city and start over, for my first job out of school. Had to leave friends behind but we kept in touch and I made a point to see them every 3-6 months. Now I’m back in the same city and our bond is stronger than ever. But going out on your own takes strength and courage…not easy
I can relate a little. 26, graduated college last winter with degrees in aviation. Still unemployed looking for work. I tried befriending this one guy in college that we shared a lot of common interest with, but i unfortunately had to stop communicating with him and that hurt. Long story short, he was the kind if person that was , "my girlfriend and my future career is more important than you and I j want to start a family" type of person. So I'm just in limbo rn hoping I get back on the grind working and going back to flight school after that.
Yupyupyup. You’re describing a good year and a half of my life. Wfh full time, barely saw people throughout my day, was incredibly lonely. Relied on my core friends from high school too much who didn’t enjoy going out/socializing. This was a dark weekly loop. You gotta get out. Break the cycle! Join a club and meet people through your hobbies! Social media is toxic when it comes to people because people are generally kind honestly! You’ll discover and be shocked how many people are in the same toxic loop you were once you’re out. You may even get to the point where you’re able to help others out too. Keep on growing people!
Theres a famous comic named Nick Mullen (guy from cumtown) who in his early 20s decided he'd do the second half of his 20s sober and completely pursue comedy and see where it takes him. Dudes worth millions now and one of the most respected comics alive. Im 24 and decided a couple months ago to do something similar and give up video games to completely focus on music until I'm 30. If Im nowhere after 5 years of hard work than yea sure I'll mayb quit then... But if I can get into the top .1% of players in a video game I can only imagine how good I could get and just how much more productive it would be to channel that energy to a better medium. Godspeed guys. Grind never stops. Be someone
I didn't hear from a friend for a while. I assumed he was too cool for me or didn't like me fr. Turns out he was struggling with depression, and he ended his own life at the beginning of the month. Reach out to your friends if you don't hear from them.
Wasted all of my time smoking weed as an addict , video games and isolation. This is my first year in college and i feel like a complete dullard. My critical thinking skills are severely stunted due to my past lifestyle. Compounding depression, childhood trauma , now increadibly anxious because i want to make up for all the stupidity. This is the first time in my life where i am finally dreaming . I want to be a nurse practitioner , but the stats behind my upbringing and all the turmoil leaves me believing that ill always be lonely or a shitty person. I just want to be a quality well rounded individual - that is desirable. Im about to turn 26 and havent had much experience at all. Suicidal ideation permeates through my mind almost daily after sobriety. I just want a fresh body and mind . I cant stand this i wish i had more parenting growing up - im behind in almost every aspect of my being. Its horrible.
So sorry to hear about the suicidal ideation. It struck a chord with me. Hope you find ways to get better. If you don't mind I could tell you what worked for me: Therapy No medication no drugs At least 8 hours sleep every night No sugar no alcohol Intense workouts whether it's running lifting sports whatever I joined a men's therapy group ....which is great because it cost half as much... and the sessions were 2 hours! I thought I was so weird and different.... But I found so many parallels with the other guys. Wishing you the best. It's always possible to get better.
Also I stopped watching p*** which is basically watching other people have sex. And I stopped jerking off or greatly minimized it. I only recommend cutting out above things if you find positive things to replace them with😊 like friends, activities, studying, hard work, exercise.
Thank you for your advice! For more unrequested context - i was probably an addict for an accumulated duration of 7- 8 years from the age of 14 ; now turning 26 in September. Ive been completely sober from any marijuana for almost a year now. Work out at least 3 times a week , eat healthy and dropped all indulgences to maximize recovery results. I hope to god im not long gone for a good career . Addiction runs in my family , but all of them were high functioning. Dad has a master in software engineering , he was making a great salary, grandfather was an alcoholic and worked for the CIA , aunt was on heroine and obtained her masters in chemistry. Theyve inspired me , but also im not them unfortunately. Psychology explains why theyre so smart and why im a dullard comparatively. I cant stand thinking about all the time ive wasted , its so embarrassing.
Work out or start running lately I went Through a terrible dating situation (I’m also older than you btw) I got set back through college Just finally finished at 32 (I had 2 associates degrees by accident instead of a bachelors degree by 25) I felt so lost behind couldn’t date seriously etc. Life isn’t over. You have to just be slightly better a little per day. Set goals and don’t lack Feel bad? Still go jog or work out Don’t eat bad Sleep better Read help books or whatever (to stop anxious thoughts) I am also anxious bc of the economy and can’t find a great job after college (but I know I’m due time it will all work out)
@@JumpinFatJack thanks for sharing more of your life. You sound like you've put great things in motion. Like working out three times a week. Completely quitting marijuana use. Eating healthy, that's a big one you've done and it will have serious repercussions in your life for the better. You repeated it a couple times that it really bothers you how much time you've wasted. Listen, I'm a successful small business owner and I didn't go back to college until I was 33! Also do you know how ridiculously young you sound to me? There is so much time ahead of you. Thinking about the time you wasted..... it just gives you excuses to waste even more. There is nothing you can do about the past. Just look forward because that is in your control. Meanwhile, you look at people that seem successful ....they're married and have kids ......and then their life is wrecked due to health problems or divorce or some tragedy when they're 40 or 50. It's cliche but it's never too late to start. I'm 50 and I haven't even been married yet. Even I don't think I'm too late. I'm just focused on making one day better than the other. I wish you the same! (PS why focus so much on career? First you gotta get your head right. That's what I did. I read help self-help , went to therapy and group sessions for many years. F*** , you can work for the CIA and be miserable.)
Only 2 minutes in but this is exactly what has happened to me. I started making strong changes to my habits, to improve my mental health/levels of consistent misery; and soon realized how empty I really was. My friends did complain that I wasn't online as much, no one wanted to join me for nature walks or trying new things. My therapist (who has helped ALOT, fellow men, please join me in trying therapy, you've just got to find the right one) She said that I'm growing, and my "tribe" needs to change along with me, that a new group of people has to follow the change. These people come into your life slowly but surely, and part of the work is making sure they know you want be a part of their tribe. Make the efforts, introduce yourself to strangers, it's *hard* at first. But the people you are looking for, are looking for you too. We will find our tribe boys, I promise. 🙌
Always choosing between loneliness & bad company is a punishment in itself, but I'll always pick loneliness. I'd rather be happy by myself than sit around a bunch of assholes wasting my time
This is weird to me, I still hang out with my tight group of friends from my early 20’s sometimes multiple times a week. We are all on very different paths, and make hugely different incomes from one another. But who cares? I can’t imagine dropping one of my close friends because they made more or less money than me.
THIS is the take I was looking for. Self-improvement content is always going to have a skew to it, but this video seems to be missing any sense of what real close friends are like. The loneliness epidemic isn't exactly a story of people isolating and leveling up.
I'm 35. By 25-30 most friends from your youth will be engaged on their own lives, raising a family, kids or business. But you start meeting new and interesting people too, just don't dive into your cave, be open to new friendship, take care of yourself, and star pursuing a career (don't wait to much on this one). The sooner you figure what you want in live, more chances you have to succeed.
I had a friend group just like this up until about 25. We all had an amazing time together and partied a lot, however we were all stagnant and not really doing much with our lives. Finally cut ties when I realized we were all holding each other back and couldn’t grow together, but that was when my life really took off and found a good career and met my now fiancé. Still miss those guys, but they are still doing the same old stuff as far as I know
Dropping a huge truth bomb there, my friend. People ask me why I'm not married or why I feel lonely and I tried to put it into words... and I couldn't. But you did, and maybe now I can give a concise answer.
Good stuff here. When I was starting to get into my career around 2015/2016, I reconnected with some highschool friends. By this point we are in our early twenties. Happened to visit a taco bell that was nearly 24 hours late night - they didn't have the item they wanted so they proceeded to curse and threaten the person at the speaker in the drive through . Terrible behavior. They said things so bad upon driving by the window, the workers seemed afraid and shocked. That night I never saw them again, blocked on socials and moved on with people I felt were better. Afterwards I realized when we chatted about our ambitions they seemed to have some disdain when I answered the questions they asked me. Your circle will become you if its bad.
0:35 let’s simmer down now. Videogames shouldn’t be compared to alcohol, first of all. That’s literally what i do as an escape from my depression and some of them are genuine masterpieces everyone should experience. I might even turn my passion for video games into a career, so easy on the negative connotation you’re associating with them. 💯🔥🐦🔥
0:35 let’s simmer down now. Alcohol shouldn’t be compared to video games, first of all. That’s literally what i do as an escape from my depression and some drinks are genuine masterpieces everyone should experience. I might even turn my passion for alcohol into a career, so easy on the negative connotation you’re associating with it.
@@GnarlieCharlie right. You can also overdose on video games and get pixel poisoning. Extremely detailed 4K graphics can lead to mental confusion, vomiting, and in extreme cases, kidney damage . . .
@@GnarlieCharlie Lololol um. Dude. Alcohol can literally kill you. Playing video games not so much unless you like ram the controller down your throat 🤦🏻♂️ which seems to be something you might need.
24. What im seeking is very very different. I try not to speak about it. I found quite confidance is so fucking powerful. I need no one to validate me.
My situation is different. I had a friend who is into everything you say, hardcore self improvement. Im a more chill dude who stills fulfill my responsibilities and have goals. But i dont make hustling my priority. In the end I got a higher paying job than him, and he started being passive aggressive towards me. I suspected it was jealousy but he never admited. We had the tough "talk" hopefully to clear things up, but he ghosted me soon after. In his mind he was so focus on "leveling up", that he left everything else behind. Even his strategies to handling his personal finances were a bit dubious from my perspective. I guess he couldnt handle the fact that I did not hustle as much as him, but i leveled up anyways. Moral of the story, dont be obsessed with something and make ur identity revolve around it. Else when something challenges ur identity, such as seeing someone "less worthy" than you doing better, you start to feel self doubt and then tear down those friendships.
I turn 25 in December of 2025 so I got a little time left but guys if u are under 20 or in your teens don’t take these years for granted cause age 25 will come fast and so will age 30.
At 25 I still was in college. I graduated late at 28. At 30 I started my current job. Now 5 years later in my job I have my family, home and really new friends. Still have some old friends but I moved from my town.
I'm 35. If you think life changes after 25, just wait until you reach my age lol. If you think that your friends will be there forever, think again. I don't mean to be negative, just telling it how it is so that people don't have unrealistic expectations about what it will be like.
I stopped smoking weed and drinking casually after I started powerlifting and training for 10k runs. At first, it was funny because my freinds would playfully offer me fast food, alcohol and weed knowing I would politely decline, but after 6 weeks they suddenly started getting annoyed, saying I was taking it too seriously. I got major whiplash and had no idea how to handle it
I came to this realization recently. I just turned 27 and over the past 3 years I have been really working on myself. I’ve been learning new skills, bought a house, and saving up some money to invest. Because of that I have not been spending too much time with my friends. Since I have not been spending as much time with them they took it as I don’t like them, which isn’t true. It’s just I only have so much time in the day and can only spend it on so many things. As a result we have drifted a part a little bit, and now that I’m kind of where I want to be at it is kind of lonely. I’ve been slowly reconnecting with my old friends and they see where I’ve gone and I think it’s motivating them a bit to do better. I think I just started a little earlier than them. I think an important point Jack noted is that communication is key. I didn’t really do that and think that why that rift between us happened. If you have good friends and communicate to them, then there shouldn’t be an issue.
Im 29 and have 2 toddlers. Of you are reading this and are a young person who one day plans to have a family just remember that you have more time now than ever. It is truly a luxury to have even an hour to "come home from work and play video games". Do not waste your time. Find yourself a good girl, marry her and make babies. You will see what life is all about. Whether you know it or not, every choice you make is in preparation for the moment you have a family of your own. All of the selfish desires of life melt away and you will get serious about creating a legacy for others (childre) rather than accomplishing frivolous goals like cars vacations mansions. Those are great but life's purpose is to serve the Lord and to create and raise good people.
In Soul, my favorite part was where he started to appreciate the little things, like the leaves blowing in the wind 🍂 , because that’s when he found happiness
Okay, update. As I promised. I Went to a school today and met girl already sort of talking with her and have a locker with her. I guess that is progress? I want to meet everyone but I guess tomorrow.
I had an exchange with my therapist a while ago (paraphrasing): "What's your greatest resource?" "Uh, time?" "No. Your greatest resource is self-efficacy." "I don't understand." "Most of the men I work with don't believe they're capable of building self-efficacy. They believe they're incapable of working on problems, so they give up."
It’s really important to surround yourself with like-minded people. I don’t necessarily have to constantly communicate this with my friends because we’re all grinding, we get it 💯
1:18 he makes a good point people make it seem like the worse thing in the world is being alone. Being alone kept me out of so much bs and I lost so many so called friends but I gained much more peace and self happiness which I felt like I lost years ago. Being alone is not bad as long you use that time to work on yourself and love yourself properly
Exactly my dude. Truth is, soceity never cared about men because men doesn't have any inherit value when men is born. Men, if without sufficient value, shall be socially casted, shall be forever lonely, shall never reach the goalpost that soceity consider a proper men should reach. Truth is, human society is almost always at odds with the average men, for aeons, only a small percentage of men are lucky and blessed enough to benefit from society. However, just because the above is true, doesn't mean that men have to feel sad, or be miserable. Happiness and sadness are just reactions we choose to embrace, and even if we shall never reach the hallmarks of being a man, that's not the end of it all. There is still beauty out there, there is still nature, music, art, passions, self discovery for us to enjoy. There are still hobbies, passion, and goals for us to reach. We just have to stop trying to desire the things that we may never receive, appreciate the things that we currently still have, and invest in ourselves, as the person we always wanted to be. I see many men in the comments who are more successful than me, men that have everything together, yet they're still claim that they're not fufilled. That's because they choose to dwell in the thought that they will forever be lonely, dwell with the things they were never meant to have. Such desires are bound to make them suffer in despair. We can never change our circumstances, but we can always change our mindset and our reactions to it.
You naturally grow as you age and gain more responsibility But aging doesn’t mean you HAVE to leave things behind. Just because you’re 26 doesn’t mean you have to completely 100% cut out alcohol and video games. Just moderate yourself.
I have a salaried job, coach boxing/kickboxing part-time, serve in the National Reserves, I'm writing a bunch of stories and poems and I'm even making my own tabletop game. My inner circle has shrunk down to my girlfriend and little brother. I feel incredibly lonely.
@@crimson_acd565 the secret is I don't. Focusing on any one aspect diminishes the time and energy I have for the others. I just set goals and cycle through my interests for varying periods of time until I complete them or run out time/energy.
^and women have to make the second. I'm all for making the first move, but I expect a response if the other person is interested. No man should waste his time with the "chase" unless she makes it clear she's interested.
Reality: I had the "honest conversation" with most of my friends and all but one are no longer my friend. The guys I find in my social/financial group are all busy with their family, career, etc. I am too. That's just life. Your family is your priority and most of your friends will only be around during certain seasons of your life.
Video games in moderation can actually help improve cognition and problem solving skills. As long as you’re balancing a life outside of games you’re fine.
It is lonely but don't give up. With time you can meet more people that are very motivated and mature enough to tolerate you're absence when you are of on an adventure. The hard part is looking for these friends because they also have been rejected by most of their social groups. If I where looking for such friend I would probably try meeting young entrepreneurs or people in freelance. I find they usually are the people most likely to have the same mindset. Also read books about social interactions. you may not know it but without practice you forget how to be likable to other people.
This is so true. I’m 26 and have so many friends I never see anymore. I feel like I don’t have any friends, even though I know if we hung out it would be like nothing changed. But what I’ve realized is some of us have become professionals in what we do, while others are still living the same as they did in college.
When I was making upwards of £15k a month at 25 I felt this loneliness, no one tells you financial success is lonely and comes with the territory. This often proceeds a season of self sabotage. Chasing girls, going out to drink more and putting off work you need to get done. Trust me just get use to the pain of loneliness for a season and avoid doing the dumb shit.
I broke up with a girl that I had been playing games with for 4 years when i turned 28. I had told myself the entire time that the relationship was important and blah blah blah. In less than a year since i was able to close a place. Get a new place. Get a government job. Have a handful of MMA fights. Become a personal trainer..etc. It has been horrifyingly lonely at times. Especially when before i was used to coming home to a spouse pretty much every single day. But man the growth. I barely recognize myself from before. I'm trying to build longer lasting, deep connections with things now. It takes a lot more effort and a lot less comfort than that relationship. But it all feels so much more real than that did too.
I’ve never related to a video more in my entire life. This described my situation word for word literally. It wasn’t until recently (28) where I just analyzed everything for quite some time and came to the same exact conclusion. It’s pretty scary to realize, if I’m being honest. Mind boggling that I’ve been anchored down by the people you’ve been trying to pull up for years, when in fact I’m no where close to where I would prefer to be. Excellent video
The truth is you just need to level up with friends who are on the same page. As I age and do better and better in life, I started focusing on levelling my existing friends as well. It has gotten to a point we are all meeting weekly to review our quarterly objectives. They are gaining traction in their career and businesses
I'm in my 30's. My two best mates are aged 58 and 19. Why? Because they're on their game, like me. They're hustling and making money. We're literally generations apart but we're united in our desire to become the best. The older guy is a millionaire, the younger guy just starting. Wealth and success doesn't give a damn how old you are.
I just turned 25 and this problem couldn't be more relevant to me. I never want to estrange them, I love them, they have been more a family to me than my real family. It's so hard to pull away but I've recently realised it's impossible to grow when I'm at the bar 3-4 times a week, I just dont know what to do, the video has helped me realise it's natural and not as existential as it feels
its not existencial bro , its anxiety , are big decisions that you have to make it , keep going men , if you are little bit social , you are gonna get friends , sometimes the human being complicate his own life , its so simple the life men , good bles you
you just described my life, I'm finishing school this year and from 5nd grade I barely talked with class mates, as I was busy at home all day so was doing work in school and just had different interests and nothing in common. This is what I needed
After watching the video, this feels like a wake up call to me after 4 years of wasting shit doing nothing. Fr, i had anxiety questiioning my life choices with full of regrets and doubts cause im aint doing something that im afraid off.
Most of my best friends from my early to late 20’s….are not still a big part of my life. Some faded out. Some fell out. Some hung around until my early 40’s. I still have 3 friends out of the 20 or so….that I knew in my late teens to early 20’s. My 2 or 3 good friends today…are from my Church. Without God….nothing means anything.
I’m 23, hopefully transitioning to a fire fighting job which is a level up for me, I never partied or went out to bars as much, had a girl for 3 years and we split up, I’m at peace but lonely ash but that’s also because I’m still growing and learning to appreciate what I have, I also just stopped talking to a ton of people in my life due to so much noise, I take tons of time to spend out doors and work out and I love it, may be super lonely to some but it’s peaceful, no drama and no bs
Friends are temporary, family is forever. It's a harsh reality, but if your friends are aren't "levelling up" with you, you have to leave them 🤷♂️ make new friends that align with your goals/interests, which I know is easier said than done but there's ways of meeting new people, especially through networking. If you feel like your friends aren't holding you back, that's fine! It's always nice to have a squad to fall back on that you can still have classic fun with.. but if you feel like they are holding you back, ditch em.
The problem for modern society is that "staying in our comfort zone" is somehow a bad thing. Going to the gym or starting a business has to be the end-all-be-all goal for some reason. There's seriously nothing wrong with having fun with your boys on Xbox.
I really recommend you rewatch this video and really listen to yourself. You say your friends are distant yet you admit to ignoring their texts. You openly say that you are on a higher level than your friends because of your job.(highly egotistical) You also condemn people for listening to content about complaining when it is extremely obvious your mindset is shaped by videos you’ve seen online. I know this because you reference online videos as something you learn a lot from. This entire video is an ego trip and a logical excuse to be lonely.
this is hard cope. you can improve your life while maintaining your social circle and emotionally important connections. if your friends are also becoming mature, they have the same issue that they have less time and will be understanding that you guys won't be able to meet up as much. it's not that you're such an awesome guy now that everyone's jealous of you so they don't want to spend time with you anymore. this happens only if you became a dick or they're not real friends
Honestly once I went back to college, I had to put more focus on my school work load, most of the friends that I had in my early 20s I lost them because all they did was drink and party, I didn’t want that anymore, and I had to put myself first and I am fine with that being alone isn’t so bad as long as you love yourself, I do a lot of things on my own I’ve been to 3 different concerts recently and I had a great time tbh, I met people there or sometimes just enjoyed myself, as you get to your late 20s you realize a lot of the friends you hung out with in your ur early 20s branches out had families or stayed in the same place. its never a bad thing to move on that’s life I cherish the memories I created but I want more for myself at the end of the day people who want to see you move up will move up with you and if not you’ll always meet new people if you put yourself out there with like minds!
Anything is bad if not taken or done in moderation. Some Video games are fun asf, I’ve spent over 400 hrs in Elden ring. And spend about 250hrs a year on NBA 2k. Although they are fun, they are definitely addictive and they distract you from reality. They beat way to “take your mind off things” should be by doing something beneficial for yourself. Not by wasting away 5hrs a day on a game when you’re not anywhere near where you want to be in life. Might even be more dangerous that some drugs because you don’t think it’s that bad and it is, “keeping you from doing worse things…” only way I see it being good is helping with hand eye coordination and being a fun career if you are consistent and entertaining enough on social media or UA-cam. Hate to admit it but, in most cases, we aren’t doing anything with all that game time… 😕
Wow great vid, very well spoken. Was that all one take? American in the midwest. Just turned 27. Really resonated with me the losing core friends from jealousy and that. A few lifelong best buddies (since like elementary school) have been hurting lately. One got a bachelors in Sports Journalism and another in Graphic Design / engineering a couple years ago. Both were unable to get a job in their field and are underemployed at jobs that they hate. I was a late bloomer and just finished my associates in a medical imaging specialty and got a great job paying really well right out of school. I couldn't believe how hostile and distant they were on our annual canoe trip we do. Like all I care about is money and I fake love my wife and such because I've been grinding so much lately... I miss the simpler times of biking around town to get mountain dew and chips from the corner store before sleepovers..
You can still play videogames and drink with your friends, you simply won’t do it for the same amount of time that you used to. What I get from this video is that people in the US live in a completely different reality compared to people from Europe. Here we almost have an habit of hanging out with your friends after work.
I used to feel this way to an extent until I realized it was a Me problem. I was living for me and neglecting connections with family and friends. Isolating myself for the sake of progress. All it takes is to pick up the phone regularly and catch up regularly. Take the time to spend some time with those people in between periods of hard work.
I feel the same. I moved to a new city. I can't find new friends. I tried it a lot, but the most people you meet are like described in the video. I'm thinking to move again. On vacations in other cities people are way different.
Honestly feel that. I’m just strolling through life right now. Absolutely lonely af. Work nights. Friends all gone. And I have 80k of student debt. It would take 1.5-2 years to pay it off if I through my paycheck into it every month. My birthday next few weeks and I honestly don’t know what to be happy about sometimes
“Most people’s life is just waiting to fall asleep”
Dang man, that hit
dude its true and its brutal for alot of men
Facts
When I was 10 years old, I asked my dad what he really wanted . He Said just sleep for a long time. I didn't understand it. But now I can relate
This is literal for me. I just can’t wait to go home and sleep. I have hobbies yes but besides that I have a nice job that pays well but ion wanna be around these ppl and it’s draining. Ion have a gf either so it’s just me. Sleep is a comfort for me or going to the gym too. That relieves stress too
Real 😢.
To me, 25 to 30 was like a blend of teenage rebellion and mid life crisis
Haha going through this right now
Why is this me lool 27 rn and can't agree more
@@ham5483Me too LOL
I’m 29 and same here man
Once you leave all your bad habits that keep you distracted, you will realise how lonely you are.
That is so true
Uhm no? If anything, those bad habits are what’s making one feel depressed = lonely.
World is a pretty big place go out there and make new friends
Yep. I feel a sudden rush of severe depression now understanding my predicament as a 30 year old virgin loner loser that missed out on his entire youth. It’s so much pain the realization of what the frick happened to lead to such a horrible life situation and the obstacle to overcome it feels so much larger then it did when at 18. 3 year timer for me. 33 years old and I will check out if my life hasn’t started yet
*Realized how lonely you were
You will lose 99 percent of your friends, there is nothing tragic about this, it's normal. People will start families and focus on their kids as they should. Most guys I know who chased friendships were left behind.
"Friends" don't do much but work anyway. The ones that don't just drink and play vids :) Both are bored to death with their lives at 25 so there's no real point in talking to them anyway. People are losers.
Bingo🔥🔥🔥‼️
@@devilsoffspring5519Also, friends are nice to have but they're something that happen along the way, they're not the main focus and people who make them their main focus will suffer greatly.
I acutally can´t understand this perspective. Focus on your family and your wife will get bored soon because you´re so much around her and don´t keep contact with your bros anymore. You need a group of friends that will support you when divorce happens.
@@DerCheker10 probably because you're in your twenties still. When you're a (responsible) father, your main focus becomes your work and your kids. And your wife's as well.
More importantly, life begins at 25-30 if you are a man, don't be discouraged. Everything before that was a trial run.
I always thought it's too late for me even for gym. I am 25 now
@@urfriendlyfboi6748 its never too late brother, i started last year at 25 and now im in the best shape of my life. You can do it!
@@urfriendlyfboi6748 never late to YOUR start
Well, if THAT was a trial run... Nevermind, I shouldn't even finish that sentence 😂
@@urfriendlyfboi6748bro we are so young. I turned 25 in July. A switch flipped in my brain. Time to wake up and make changes for ourselves.
man i know it sounds fake but im in this exact situation..i dont have anything in common with the people my age anymore and i have become lonely cause i dont have anything to talk about with them so i just dont anymore...been like this for 3 years now..i only talk to my family and so many people judge me for it..call me im not social ,weird etc etc...
this video came as a blessing ..now i know its part of the proccess and it will get better
Totally feel you man... I'm in the same boat.
same situation over here brother
Same
just get a woman or a dog.
I'm also the same. This is going to be a trend. Everyone wants peace and nobody can get it in those damn a$$ night clubs and fancy a$$ expensive lounges in them skyscrapers.
I think being lonely is a choice tbh. You don't have to drink alcohol at a bar, you can leave nightclubs at 1am instead of 4am, you can limit gaming to 1 hour. You can be decent enough to text friends back even if you're busy. People skip out on being social because of self-imposed walls
starting my bachelors tomorrow after 3 gap years and working on the side to sustain myself, gotta creat the life I really want
It’s a long but very rewarding journey. I’ve got about 7 classes left to graduate and also work in an investment firm on the side to make money. Make sure to take your time and prioritize your mental health and well-being. Rooting for you pal
Guys, is a bachelor degree worth the money and time ? @martea726
@@jsr6126depends on the degree, your plan and what you’ll use it for
@@jsr6126 depends what you want to do
Create
25-30 is the most difficult age. You lose a lot of friends, you hit reality, you start to figure out what the hell you are gonna do with your life but in the end, you will become stronger and wiser. ❤
27. I moved to another city at 25 to accelerate my career and had to start over socially. I still have no friends, mostly because I work so much and spend a lot of time in the gym. Also, It’s hard to find friends you’re compatible with when you become more successful than everyone else your age. The majority of people, as well as my friends back home, just work average jobs, hangout with the same friend group at the same bars, never do anything new, etc. I never would have expected to struggle this much with loneliness but I guess it comes with the territory.
Man, things become much grimmer if you move to another country, 28M, same shit
Reminds me of my situation a while back. I had a flying start to my career, moving to London at 21. But by 26, it all felt meaningless. I felt like I hadn't lived life at all, just worked and studied for all of it. The lack of freedom became unbearable. I switched to contracting recently and only worked half of this past year. It's made life more enjoyable, but it isn't really a long-term solution. I was only able to do it because I'm single with no responsibilities. I feel like this is the downside of careers. You earn well and live a good lifestyle while in the job, but the minute you leave that club, there's a timer ticking until you inevitably have to go back. You have to stay grinding at a high level for 30 years or more. I have to find an alternative because I ain't built for that.
@jawlig If you are a higher earner you can make investments so you don't have to keep going back. Easier said than done but it'll create the free time that you need
Make friends at the gym
@@jawlig Damn your situation is exactly the same as mine... it's eerie
without friends we'll be lonely
Fuck friends, I don't have friends I only Have family,, friend equals =end =friEND
Youre a Happy Camper 😂@@AmericanNightBot
I have the Good Lord...he never turned his back on me......hard to explain but its true.
I'm 36 it gets more common the older you get. I kind of just live my life as is.
@@AmericanNightBot your family or the family you're born in?
Older man here. This video and message resonates with me. Part of the issue is as we "level up," we prioritize what gave us a measure a success. As such, our standards have changed. Not that I'm better than my old friends, I've just learned to embrace this new season in my life. Today, I have maybe one or two close friends left. BUT, I've gained colleagues in my profession. Sacrifices are necessary, but the rewards are worth it.
Loneliness comes from thinking you're either better than or not good enough for others. It's a mind trap that both rich and poor fail to overcome. That's why it's good to get a hobby that spans across multiple levels of socio-economic classes. I recommend basketball and Warhammer
based
Totally disagree. If you "level up" and end up alone, maybe take a look inward. Likely it's a "you" problem, not that everyone else is just jealous or not on your level.
A lot of people use "leveling up" as an excuse to neglect connections in their life and become a bit of a pretentious dickhead.
I agree, you can become extremely successful and still sympathize with your friends and understand them. Yes, you could be not benefitting a lot from them but you don't have to ditch them. You could even help them.
Both sides can be true though, I guess it’s situational.
So true, this neglect is often not realized until it is too late. Relationship and brotherhood is vital! Instead of leveling up behind the scenes, make your friends join the gym with you or change the scenery from hanging out at bars and clubs to something positive. There is enough time to hangout and be serious about your career/health. Imagine how much less time you'll have when you got children 😅
THIS ONE
Im not saying smoking and binge drinking or letting your family peer pressure you isn't a BAD thing but if you "level up" and constantly point out other peoples flaws and that they haven't leveled up like you you just become a pretentious jerkwad. Not everyone needs to min max their life
Best physique
Best job
Best everything
Like bro some people are just living life lol
I totally agree. Meeting these kinds of people where you meet up with to do a business venture, then they totally ditch you and throw you under the bus because they see you as a 'risk to their business' like they didn't invite you in the first place? Now, that's a dickhead
There are many "fake" ambitious people, non ambitous people, and like 0,01% really ambitious people that are hard to find...
Guys, we’re men. Go out and talk to strangers if you feel the need to socialize. The world is your oyster!!!
It is crazy how accurate the feeling of "I want my bro to do good, but never better than me" is
yup its the worst
Being lonely is much better than being around people who never truly had your best interests at heart. Give up your need for assurance and love from other people
Gonna need neurolink for that last part ha.
That caveman brain still yearns to belong to a tribe. It's in our DNA.
its really not man. You only chose loneliness because its easy, dealing with people is hard but pushing through that and finding people that understand and love you is the only way you'll ever be content in life.
That feeling of lonelyness that you feel if you isolate and push people away will only ever get stronger. Dont poison yourself with this grindset shit you're really going to regret it
Dude just go out… Partying was one of the most beneficial things I ever did for my mental health. I dont understand why having a full time job all of a sudden means you can’t have fun on the weekend.
You stop wanting it after a while
I mean, u don‘t necessarily have to party.. other activities are just as good or better
Sometimes its like they want the grind mindset and then want to double down and absolutely remove any chance of getting a dopamine hit during their "grind" and then they wonder why they're depressed.
How much you bench?
No one cares about your parties what’s your SBD total
nobody judges you. most people dont give a shit about anybody else. the reason why you get isolated is because you develop a big head from box ticking consumer goals and believing you are getting ahead. then you become salty because no one is clapping for you, like you expected.
if you keep going out, socialising in real life and online, and don't expect that you will suddenly be surrounded by a list celebs coz you work out twice a week, you will realise that nothing has changed and your friends are still your friends.
"tall poppy syndrome" is why my girlfriend and I might have broken up. As our relationship went on, I started taking my future more serious and started working towards goals. Started working out etc and my ex since 2 months ago broke up because we started to "differ too much" (both of us still had the same interests as we always had) and "I laid too much pressure on her" while I was out there working overtime to make sure she could study (which she failed) with as little pressure as possible. She broke up on my 25th birthday exactly. Started dating some dude from her job 2 weeks after we broke up. Works part-time as well at 25 and is where I was when she and I met. We also met at our jobs. She's back to life exactly before we had a relationship, no improvements made to herself over 4 years realistically.
really feel that man, i broke up 2 months ago, she was falling deep in the rabbithole of video game addiction(16h/day) and i couldn't take it just watching her, started working out and eating healthy, that alienated us and she decided to pick the game over me, refused my offers of therapy and moved out , we were 3 years together and married, it ended just like that, tall poppy syndrome accompanied by addictions, i couldn't help a person who refuses help. :(
Sucks she did that on your 25th birthday. I had a similar situation not long after my 25th. She’s doing f all now in the same town, with the same loser people. You’ve surpassed her my man. Sounds like you’re doing well.
@@LukeyB777 I had a gf who knew I had a birthday coming up (my 25th) and she as on vacation at the time. I told her to at least call me on my birthday. well guess what. my birthday came and not even a single phone call. Just a pathetic 3 few word happy birthday text. I snapped and broke up with her immediately. I could already feel like it was over before anyway. But that was the nail in the coffin for me and a solid reason. Needless to say she died a year or so later. OD'd and with a guy she was with too. So 2 deaths. Crazy thing is she died on her birthday. What would be her 26th I believe.
This is a load of bs, you're talking about one dudes experience yet you’re acting like you have unlocked the key to life. There are always opportunities for new friends
I’m 26 but I am glad I got this wonderful message on time. I’m going to be honest with you guys. Last year, before I turned 25, I thought my circle was legit because I got promotion on my job, my money increased, my mind changed and all of it. The people in my circle were coworkers and one buddy from my high school. A year later, that one buddy from my high school stood around. Everyone else I have to end that relationships with them. Why is that? Well, the keyword I mentioned before was Coworker. Coworkers are associates. Now, Idk how certain people was able to pull off a healthy friendship with a coworker outside of their job and stick with them long term. You gotta have a connection with that person and something in common because if you don’t, you’ll end up getting the same results. You guys keep your head up. Everything will be alright. Just trust the lord and he’ll show you the way. Y’all stay strong now. Wish you all the best of Grace
Damn, man. This explains my situation almost exactly. I gave up partying and started going hard in my career and my health and fitness. Now, I'm struggling to find groups and things to do in order to meet new people and potentially find a woman to spend my time (and maybe, hopefully the rest of my life) with. I'm gonna check out your free content and maybe join socializer. Love your videos. They remind me I am not the only one going through this part of life. Thanks
What feels almost worse is being 31 almost 32 and being in the same point as I was at 25. I'm the one who never has anything going on and always wants to hang out, while all the friends around me have moved on and are doing other things.
29 here and I feel the same. Most of the boys I hung out with all moved on, about the start a new chapter in life.
It's never too late to start working on yourself
Well that should tell you to work on self find a new skill to accomplish. Find things or goals to achieve quit smoking for a while & go to the gym instead. Gotta want better for yourself and just put in the work
@@KenGlo All this advice is so generic like your giving a 17yo advice tho just say you don't know what to say and move on.
Many guys already go to the gym and work and not everyone has some career progression to move into 6 figures their just land locked based on their job unless they completely reskill into a brand new skill which would cost thousands in loans.
@@MrFrankEast that’s your perception whoever you are I was just encouraging him but whatever floats your boat….🤣 you internet warriors always got some negative shit to say get tf on with that negative shit bruh and have a good day
26 and extremely uncertain about life due to zero guidance (no father, addict mother) don’t know what I’m doing.
Been there before and I’d say try talking to older men with knowledge ask questions on things your uncertain of & apply it to your life. I’ve always felt the same way and still do but don’t let that stop me from wanting to learn or listen to people that been here longer than me & are doing well in life. Keep faith in god & be willing to listen & learn from different people on your journey god bless 🙏🏾
Go to school. Get a JOB. Loser. Get a girl.
U have nothing to loose then take some risk then .. I dont have these Issues but I don't take risk becuae I don't want to loose anything
If you are aware that it was your parents fault, it is now your responsibility.
Find yourself a purpose that will make you enough money to live on - at a minimum. If it can make you a millionaire, even better. Having a purpose will solve 90% of your problems
I have the same few best friends from 12 years old. Glad they've been my good friends ever since
You are among the very lucky ones. Keep that connection you guys have, it's extremely rare...
A lot of the problems you are describing are unique to men in 2024. It’s tough times for us in a society where we aren’t valued as much.
My number 1 recommendation to stay level headed is to be balanced in all aspects of life. Gym/cardio at lest 5 days a week. Eat well, no sugar or grease. Spend a day or two with family. Spend a day or two with friends. Don’t over invest in women, I’ve seen a lot of my friends go down from this. Don’t over invest in a job or money because it is always out of your control most the time.
Just a few things.
That's pretty solid advice man, thank you!!!
That’s great advice
Finally a sensible comment! You sir, have got it figured out 👌
its ironic cause , the most man are terrified cause they thinking that never ever are gonna meet girls hahaha , and one of your advice is "don't over invest in women" , i think that its about carisma , its about how you feel lonely and if you believe that you are gonna get wones, friends or warever
This hits home man I just turned 26 started earning six figures for the first time in my life and feels lonelier than ever. I put over 8 months of work with countless of sleepless nights to get where I am right now and definitely lost quite a few friends and relationships in the process. I just started hanging out with the an older group of friends over discord and they're still doing the same thing, playing video games, watching anime and it feels like I'm not able to relate any more. I still enjoy those hobbies in moderation, but focused on a lot more deadlines I've set for myself so that I don't need to grind as hard in my 50s in the future. I'm trying to balance it out with things I enjoy, but curious on everyone else's perspective.
If you are 26 and earning 6 figures, congratulations you have done very well and should be proud. If I was you, I would try to be in a room where I am the stupidest and not the smartest.
@@GramDraws Thank you brotha for sure 🙏🏽
Playing video games and watching anime is a relatively wallet friendly form of comfort and peace of mind after a long hard days work nothing wrong with it
I’m 29 and would love to be making six figures. What do you do for work? I don’t know anyone making that much around my age.
You on the right path bro, stick with it you'll figure it out. Remember that the grind mindset can also be applied to relationships and meeting new people and making new friends, not just making money
I know exactly what this feeling is like. I had to move to a different city and start over, for my first job out of school. Had to leave friends behind but we kept in touch and I made a point to see them every 3-6 months. Now I’m back in the same city and our bond is stronger than ever. But going out on your own takes strength and courage…not easy
I can relate a little. 26, graduated college last winter with degrees in aviation. Still unemployed looking for work.
I tried befriending this one guy in college that we shared a lot of common interest with, but i unfortunately had to stop communicating with him and that hurt. Long story short, he was the kind if person that was , "my girlfriend and my future career is more important than you and I j want to start a family" type of person.
So I'm just in limbo rn hoping I get back on the grind working and going back to flight school after that.
Yupyupyup. You’re describing a good year and a half of my life. Wfh full time, barely saw people throughout my day, was incredibly lonely. Relied on my core friends from high school too much who didn’t enjoy going out/socializing. This was a dark weekly loop. You gotta get out. Break the cycle! Join a club and meet people through your hobbies! Social media is toxic when it comes to people because people are generally kind honestly! You’ll discover and be shocked how many people are in the same toxic loop you were once you’re out. You may even get to the point where you’re able to help others out too. Keep on growing people!
Theres a famous comic named Nick Mullen (guy from cumtown) who in his early 20s decided he'd do the second half of his 20s sober and completely pursue comedy and see where it takes him. Dudes worth millions now and one of the most respected comics alive. Im 24 and decided a couple months ago to do something similar and give up video games to completely focus on music until I'm 30. If Im nowhere after 5 years of hard work than yea sure I'll mayb quit then... But if I can get into the top .1% of players in a video game I can only imagine how good I could get and just how much more productive it would be to channel that energy to a better medium. Godspeed guys. Grind never stops. Be someone
I didn't hear from a friend for a while. I assumed he was too cool for me or didn't like me fr. Turns out he was struggling with depression, and he ended his own life at the beginning of the month.
Reach out to your friends if you don't hear from them.
Wasted all of my time smoking weed as an addict , video games and isolation. This is my first year in college and i feel like a complete dullard. My critical thinking skills are severely stunted due to my past lifestyle. Compounding depression, childhood trauma , now increadibly anxious because i want to make up for all the stupidity.
This is the first time in my life where i am finally dreaming . I want to be a nurse practitioner , but the stats behind my upbringing and all the turmoil leaves me believing that ill always be lonely or a shitty person.
I just want to be a quality well rounded individual - that is desirable. Im about to turn 26 and havent had much experience at all.
Suicidal ideation permeates through my mind almost daily after sobriety. I just want a fresh body and mind .
I cant stand this i wish i had more parenting growing up - im behind in almost every aspect of my being. Its horrible.
So sorry to hear about the suicidal ideation.
It struck a chord with me.
Hope you find ways to get better.
If you don't mind I could tell you what worked for me:
Therapy
No medication
no drugs
At least 8 hours sleep every night
No sugar no alcohol
Intense workouts whether it's running lifting sports whatever
I joined a men's therapy group ....which is great because it cost half as much... and the sessions were 2 hours!
I thought I was so weird and different.... But I found so many parallels with the other guys.
Wishing you the best.
It's always possible to get better.
Also I stopped watching p*** which is basically watching other people have sex. And I stopped jerking off or greatly minimized it.
I only recommend cutting out above things if you find positive things to replace them with😊 like friends, activities, studying, hard work, exercise.
Thank you for your advice! For more unrequested context - i was probably an addict for an accumulated duration of 7- 8 years from the age of 14 ; now turning 26 in September. Ive been completely sober from any marijuana for almost a year now. Work out at least 3 times a week , eat healthy and dropped all indulgences to maximize recovery results. I hope to god im not long gone for a good career . Addiction runs in my family , but all of them were high functioning. Dad has a master in software engineering , he was making a great salary, grandfather was an alcoholic and worked for the CIA , aunt was on heroine and obtained her masters in chemistry. Theyve inspired me , but also im not them unfortunately.
Psychology explains why theyre so smart and why im a dullard comparatively.
I cant stand thinking about all the time ive wasted , its so embarrassing.
Work out or start running lately I went
Through a terrible dating situation (I’m also older than you btw) I got set back through college
Just finally finished at 32 (I had 2 associates degrees by accident instead of a bachelors degree by 25)
I felt so lost behind couldn’t date seriously etc.
Life isn’t over. You have to just be slightly better a little per day.
Set goals and don’t lack
Feel bad? Still go jog or work out
Don’t eat bad
Sleep better
Read help books or whatever (to stop anxious thoughts)
I am also anxious bc of the economy and can’t find a great job after college (but I know I’m due time it will all work out)
@@JumpinFatJack thanks for sharing more of your life.
You sound like you've put great things in motion. Like working out three times a week.
Completely quitting marijuana use.
Eating healthy, that's a big one you've done and it will have serious repercussions in your life for the better.
You repeated it a couple times that it really bothers you how much time you've wasted.
Listen, I'm a successful small business owner and I didn't go back to college until I was 33!
Also do you know how ridiculously young you sound to me? There is so much time ahead of you.
Thinking about the time you wasted..... it just gives you excuses to waste even more. There is nothing you can do about the past. Just look forward because that is in your control.
Meanwhile, you look at people that seem successful ....they're married and have kids ......and then their life is wrecked due to health problems or divorce or some tragedy when they're 40 or 50.
It's cliche but it's never too late to start.
I'm 50 and I haven't even been married yet. Even I don't think I'm too late.
I'm just focused on making one day better than the other.
I wish you the same!
(PS why focus so much on career? First you gotta get your head right. That's what I did.
I read help self-help , went to therapy and group sessions for many years.
F*** , you can work for the CIA and be miserable.)
Only 2 minutes in but this is exactly what has happened to me. I started making strong changes to my habits, to improve my mental health/levels of consistent misery; and soon realized how empty I really was. My friends did complain that I wasn't online as much, no one wanted to join me for nature walks or trying new things. My therapist
(who has helped ALOT, fellow men, please join me in trying therapy, you've just got to find the right one)
She said that I'm growing, and my "tribe" needs to change along with me, that a new group of people has to follow the change. These people come into your life slowly but surely, and part of the work is making sure they know you want be a part of their tribe. Make the efforts, introduce yourself to strangers, it's *hard* at first. But the people you are looking for, are looking for you too. We will find our tribe boys, I promise. 🙌
Always choosing between loneliness & bad company is a punishment in itself, but I'll always pick loneliness. I'd rather be happy by myself than sit around a bunch of assholes wasting my time
Same
I agree i only feel just as lonely anyway.
This is weird to me, I still hang out with my tight group of friends from my early 20’s sometimes multiple times a week. We are all on very different paths, and make hugely different incomes from one another. But who cares? I can’t imagine dropping one of my close friends because they made more or less money than me.
@yamkaw346 I can't imagine someone would drop their friend for making more money unless they were flaunting it, or boasting about it.
@@TheMarksmansYT Yeah, then they are dropping them for being an ass, not making more money.
THIS is the take I was looking for. Self-improvement content is always going to have a skew to it, but this video seems to be missing any sense of what real close friends are like. The loneliness epidemic isn't exactly a story of people isolating and leveling up.
I'm 35. By 25-30 most friends from your youth will be engaged on their own lives, raising a family, kids or business. But you start meeting new and interesting people too, just don't dive into your cave, be open to new friendship, take care of yourself, and star pursuing a career (don't wait to much on this one). The sooner you figure what you want in live, more chances you have to succeed.
I had a friend group just like this up until about 25. We all had an amazing time together and partied a lot, however we were all stagnant and not really doing much with our lives. Finally cut ties when I realized we were all holding each other back and couldn’t grow together, but that was when my life really took off and found a good career and met my now fiancé. Still miss those guys, but they are still doing the same old stuff as far as I know
Do not Overwork because it will only benefit other People..
Also some Friends are only there because you have little worth then if they find a better thing they leave you...
Dropping a huge truth bomb there, my friend. People ask me why I'm not married or why I feel lonely and I tried to put it into words... and I couldn't. But you did, and maybe now I can give a concise answer.
Good stuff here. When I was starting to get into my career around 2015/2016, I reconnected with some highschool friends. By this point we are in our early twenties. Happened to visit a taco bell that was nearly 24 hours late night - they didn't have the item they wanted so they proceeded to curse and threaten the person at the speaker in the drive through . Terrible behavior. They said things so bad upon driving by the window, the workers seemed afraid and shocked. That night I never saw them again, blocked on socials and moved on with people I felt were better. Afterwards I realized when we chatted about our ambitions they seemed to have some disdain when I answered the questions they asked me. Your circle will become you if its bad.
0:35 let’s simmer down now. Videogames shouldn’t be compared to alcohol, first of all. That’s literally what i do as an escape from my depression and some of them are genuine masterpieces everyone should experience. I might even turn my passion for video games into a career, so easy on the negative connotation you’re associating with them. 💯🔥🐦🔥
0:35 let’s simmer down now. Alcohol shouldn’t be compared to video games, first of all. That’s literally what i do as an escape from my depression and some drinks are genuine masterpieces everyone should experience. I might even turn my passion for alcohol into a career, so easy on the negative connotation you’re associating with it.
@@GnarlieCharlie right. You can also overdose on video games and get pixel poisoning. Extremely detailed 4K graphics can lead to mental confusion, vomiting, and in extreme cases, kidney damage . . .
@@jaysony8587 LMAOOO i just snorted on my coffee. That mf thought he was being clever & doing something huh
@@GnarlieCharlie Lololol um. Dude. Alcohol can literally kill you. Playing video games not so much unless you like ram the controller down your throat 🤦🏻♂️ which seems to be something you might need.
@@jaysony8587 Not to mention, video games cause bar fights and altercations. In extreme cases, they can run people over and cause car wrecks!
24. What im seeking is very very different.
I try not to speak about it. I found quite confidance is so fucking powerful. I need no one to validate me.
sure buddy
It's kinda true tho... Having quiet confidence and knowing your worth is very attractive. For example Keanu Reeves@@moshesne4597
My situation is different. I had a friend who is into everything you say, hardcore self improvement. Im a more chill dude who stills fulfill my responsibilities and have goals. But i dont make hustling my priority.
In the end I got a higher paying job than him, and he started being passive aggressive towards me. I suspected it was jealousy but he never admited. We had the tough "talk" hopefully to clear things up, but he ghosted me soon after.
In his mind he was so focus on "leveling up", that he left everything else behind. Even his strategies to handling his personal finances were a bit dubious from my perspective. I guess he couldnt handle the fact that I did not hustle as much as him, but i leveled up anyways.
Moral of the story, dont be obsessed with something and make ur identity revolve around it. Else when something challenges ur identity, such as seeing someone "less worthy" than you doing better, you start to feel self doubt and then tear down those friendships.
I turn 25 in December of 2025 so I got a little time left but guys if u are under 20 or in your teens don’t take these years for granted cause age 25 will come fast and so will age 30.
its a similar thing with intelligent kids. They're often isolated and lonely.
At 25 I still was in college. I graduated late at 28. At 30 I started my current job. Now 5 years later in my job I have my family, home and really new friends. Still have some old friends but I moved from my town.
I'm 35. If you think life changes after 25, just wait until you reach my age lol. If you think that your friends will be there forever, think again. I don't mean to be negative, just telling it how it is so that people don't have unrealistic expectations about what it will be like.
At least you’re being honest especially on the friends part
I stopped smoking weed and drinking casually after I started powerlifting and training for 10k runs. At first, it was funny because my freinds would playfully offer me fast food, alcohol and weed knowing I would politely decline, but after 6 weeks they suddenly started getting annoyed, saying I was taking it too seriously. I got major whiplash and had no idea how to handle it
I came to this realization recently. I just turned 27 and over the past 3 years I have been really working on myself. I’ve been learning new skills, bought a house, and saving up some money to invest. Because of that I have not been spending too much time with my friends.
Since I have not been spending as much time with them they took it as I don’t like them, which isn’t true. It’s just I only have so much time in the day and can only spend it on so many things.
As a result we have drifted a part a little bit, and now that I’m kind of where I want to be at it is kind of lonely. I’ve been slowly reconnecting with my old friends and they see where I’ve gone and I think it’s motivating them a bit to do better. I think I just started a little earlier than them.
I think an important point Jack noted is that communication is key. I didn’t really do that and think that why that rift between us happened. If you have good friends and communicate to them, then there shouldn’t be an issue.
Im 29 and have 2 toddlers. Of you are reading this and are a young person who one day plans to have a family just remember that you have more time now than ever. It is truly a luxury to have even an hour to "come home from work and play video games". Do not waste your time. Find yourself a good girl, marry her and make babies. You will see what life is all about. Whether you know it or not, every choice you make is in preparation for the moment you have a family of your own. All of the selfish desires of life melt away and you will get serious about creating a legacy for others (childre) rather than accomplishing frivolous goals like cars vacations mansions. Those are great but life's purpose is to serve the Lord and to create and raise good people.
Man I felt this in my soul. Thanks for the vid, man, you are appreciated 💯
In Soul, my favorite part was where he started to appreciate the little things, like the leaves blowing in the wind 🍂 , because that’s when he found happiness
Okay, update. As I promised. I Went to a school today and met girl already sort of talking with her and have a locker with her. I guess that is progress? I want to meet everyone but I guess tomorrow.
I had an exchange with my therapist a while ago (paraphrasing):
"What's your greatest resource?"
"Uh, time?"
"No. Your greatest resource is self-efficacy."
"I don't understand."
"Most of the men I work with don't believe they're capable of building self-efficacy. They believe they're incapable of working on problems, so they give up."
The way you explain things is so clear.
It’s really important to surround yourself with like-minded people. I don’t necessarily have to constantly communicate this with my friends because we’re all grinding, we get it 💯
I needed to see this. Thank you.
Going through a strange pivot point in my life.. Just turned 27 and a lot of the things you said have hit home.
1:18 he makes a good point people make it seem like the worse thing in the world is being alone. Being alone kept me out of so much bs and I lost so many so called friends but I gained much more peace and self happiness which I felt like I lost years ago. Being alone is not bad as long you use that time to work on yourself and love yourself properly
Exactly my dude. Truth is, soceity never cared about men because men doesn't have any inherit value when men is born. Men, if without sufficient value, shall be socially casted, shall be forever lonely, shall never reach the goalpost that soceity consider a proper men should reach. Truth is, human society is almost always at odds with the average men, for aeons, only a small percentage of men are lucky and blessed enough to benefit from society.
However, just because the above is true, doesn't mean that men have to feel sad, or be miserable. Happiness and sadness are just reactions we choose to embrace, and even if we shall never reach the hallmarks of being a man, that's not the end of it all. There is still beauty out there, there is still nature, music, art, passions, self discovery for us to enjoy. There are still hobbies, passion, and goals for us to reach. We just have to stop trying to desire the things that we may never receive, appreciate the things that we currently still have, and invest in ourselves, as the person we always wanted to be.
I see many men in the comments who are more successful than me, men that have everything together, yet they're still claim that they're not fufilled. That's because they choose to dwell in the thought that they will forever be lonely, dwell with the things they were never meant to have. Such desires are bound to make them suffer in despair. We can never change our circumstances, but we can always change our mindset and our reactions to it.
You naturally grow as you age and gain more responsibility
But aging doesn’t mean you HAVE to leave things behind. Just because you’re 26 doesn’t mean you have to completely 100% cut out alcohol and video games.
Just moderate yourself.
I have a salaried job, coach boxing/kickboxing part-time, serve in the National Reserves, I'm writing a bunch of stories and poems and I'm even making my own tabletop game. My inner circle has shrunk down to my girlfriend and little brother. I feel incredibly lonely.
I have varied interests very similar to those, how do you manage the time!?
@@crimson_acd565 the secret is I don't. Focusing on any one aspect diminishes the time and energy I have for the others. I just set goals and cycle through my interests for varying periods of time until I complete them or run out time/energy.
@@crimson_acd565 Not drinking, close social life, etc etc
Bro if she gives a phone number and doesn’t text you back means she doesn’t care. She’d text back right away if she did
but men should make the first move
^and women have to make the second. I'm all for making the first move, but I expect a response if the other person is interested.
No man should waste his time with the "chase" unless she makes it clear she's interested.
@@libervitaexaltis4551 no actually your supposed to get choosing signals from her before you even bother. Look up choosing signals
The Opposite Males give the Phone Number but get Forgotten and Ghosted..
nobody has time for that
Reality: I had the "honest conversation" with most of my friends and all but one are no longer my friend. The guys I find in my social/financial group are all busy with their family, career, etc. I am too. That's just life. Your family is your priority and most of your friends will only be around during certain seasons of your life.
Video games in moderation can actually help improve cognition and problem solving skills. As long as you’re balancing a life outside of games you’re fine.
Exactly. I only play Sunday nights at most two hours
Yep, it prevents burnout too. Few hours on weekend should be good.
most of us gamers aren’t just playing a couple hrs on a weekend lol
It’s hard to not play more than you should especially, when life gets hard
@@PnkSupreme then it’s okay to do that. Life is already hard enough. People should take a little bit of time to decompress.
It is lonely but don't give up. With time you can meet more people that are very motivated and mature enough to tolerate you're absence when you are of on an adventure. The hard part is looking for these friends because they also have been rejected by most of their social groups. If I where looking for such friend I would probably try meeting young entrepreneurs or people in freelance. I find they usually are the people most likely to have the same mindset.
Also read books about social interactions. you may not know it but without practice you forget how to be likable to other people.
This is so true. I’m 26 and have so many friends I never see anymore. I feel like I don’t have any friends, even though I know if we hung out it would be like nothing changed. But what I’ve realized is some of us have become professionals in what we do, while others are still living the same as they did in college.
When I was making upwards of £15k a month at 25 I felt this loneliness, no one tells you financial success is lonely and comes with the territory. This often proceeds a season of self sabotage. Chasing girls, going out to drink more and putting off work you need to get done. Trust me just get use to the pain of loneliness for a season and avoid doing the dumb shit.
Bro abandoning those core friendships because they havnt started a business or they dont go the gym as much as you... Come one man😅
I broke up with a girl that I had been playing games with for 4 years when i turned 28. I had told myself the entire time that the relationship was important and blah blah blah. In less than a year since i was able to close a place. Get a new place. Get a government job. Have a handful of MMA fights. Become a personal trainer..etc. It has been horrifyingly lonely at times. Especially when before i was used to coming home to a spouse pretty much every single day. But man the growth. I barely recognize myself from before. I'm trying to build longer lasting, deep connections with things now. It takes a lot more effort and a lot less comfort than that relationship. But it all feels so much more real than that did too.
It’s lonely at the top. Anyone who is successful will tell you.
I’ve never related to a video more in my entire life. This described my situation word for word literally. It wasn’t until recently (28) where I just analyzed everything for quite some time and came to the same exact conclusion. It’s pretty scary to realize, if I’m being honest. Mind boggling that I’ve been anchored down by the people you’ve been trying to pull up for years, when in fact I’m no where close to where I would prefer to be. Excellent video
The truth is you just need to level up with friends who are on the same page. As I age and do better and better in life, I started focusing on levelling my existing friends as well. It has gotten to a point we are all meeting weekly to review our quarterly objectives. They are gaining traction in their career and businesses
I'm in my 30's. My two best mates are aged 58 and 19. Why? Because they're on their game, like me. They're hustling and making money.
We're literally generations apart but we're united in our desire to become the best.
The older guy is a millionaire, the younger guy just starting. Wealth and success doesn't give a damn how old you are.
I just turned 25 and this problem couldn't be more relevant to me. I never want to estrange them, I love them, they have been more a family to me than my real family. It's so hard to pull away but I've recently realised it's impossible to grow when I'm at the bar 3-4 times a week, I just dont know what to do, the video has helped me realise it's natural and not as existential as it feels
its not existencial bro , its anxiety , are big decisions that you have to make it , keep going men , if you are little bit social , you are gonna get friends , sometimes the human being complicate his own life , its so simple the life men , good bles you
you just described my life, I'm finishing school this year and from 5nd grade I barely talked with class mates, as I was busy at home all day so was doing work in school and just had different interests and nothing in common. This is what I needed
People are hold me back from chasing my dreams. I enjoy being alone. If i wanted to be by people, id go to work.
After watching the video, this feels like a wake up call to me after 4 years of wasting shit doing nothing. Fr, i had anxiety questiioning my life choices with full of regrets and doubts cause im aint doing something that im afraid off.
Most of my best friends from my early to late 20’s….are not still a big part of my life. Some faded out. Some fell out. Some hung around until my early 40’s. I still have 3 friends out of the 20 or so….that I knew in my late teens to early 20’s.
My 2 or 3 good friends today…are from my Church.
Without God….nothing means anything.
I’m 23, hopefully transitioning to a fire fighting job which is a level up for me, I never partied or went out to bars as much, had a girl for 3 years and we split up, I’m at peace but lonely ash but that’s also because I’m still growing and learning to appreciate what I have, I also just stopped talking to a ton of people in my life due to so much noise, I take tons of time to spend out doors and work out and I love it, may be super lonely to some but it’s peaceful, no drama and no bs
So many facts have been said in this video. Thank you for showing the world the struggles of successful men.
Friends are temporary, family is forever. It's a harsh reality, but if your friends are aren't "levelling up" with you, you have to leave them 🤷♂️ make new friends that align with your goals/interests, which I know is easier said than done but there's ways of meeting new people, especially through networking.
If you feel like your friends aren't holding you back, that's fine! It's always nice to have a squad to fall back on that you can still have classic fun with.. but if you feel like they are holding you back, ditch em.
Felt this at the age of 19 once I started my business and focusing on myself. Made my family a priority
The problem for modern society is that "staying in our comfort zone" is somehow a bad thing. Going to the gym or starting a business has to be the end-all-be-all goal for some reason. There's seriously nothing wrong with having fun with your boys on Xbox.
I really recommend you rewatch this video and really listen to yourself. You say your friends are distant yet you admit to ignoring their texts. You openly say that you are on a higher level than your friends because of your job.(highly egotistical) You also condemn people for listening to content about complaining when it is extremely obvious your mindset is shaped by videos you’ve seen online. I know this because you reference online videos as something you learn a lot from. This entire video is an ego trip and a logical excuse to be lonely.
FAXXXX good god this is so true.
Guys will self isolate and then complain about loneliness
this is hard cope. you can improve your life while maintaining your social circle and emotionally important connections. if your friends are also becoming mature, they have the same issue that they have less time and will be understanding that you guys won't be able to meet up as much. it's not that you're such an awesome guy now that everyone's jealous of you so they don't want to spend time with you anymore. this happens only if you became a dick or they're not real friends
Well how did you find this video then?
Honestly once I went back to college, I had to put more focus on my school work load, most of the friends that I had in my early 20s I lost them because all they did was drink and party, I didn’t want that anymore, and I had to put myself first and I am fine with that being alone isn’t so bad as long as you love yourself, I do a lot of things on my own I’ve been to 3 different concerts recently and I had a great time tbh, I met people there or sometimes just enjoyed myself, as you get to your late 20s you realize a lot of the friends you hung out with in your ur early 20s branches out had families or stayed in the same place. its never a bad thing to move on that’s life I cherish the memories I created but I want more for myself at the end of the day people who want to see you move up will move up with you and if not you’ll always meet new people if you put yourself out there with like minds!
This guy is telling the truth, I think suddenly starting to make more makes one super lonely
Dont feel bad for leaving ppl who can't or dont wanna grow behind. It will save u time.money and stress
Anything is bad if not taken or done in moderation. Some Video games are fun asf, I’ve spent over 400 hrs in Elden ring. And spend about 250hrs a year on NBA 2k. Although they are fun, they are definitely addictive and they distract you from reality. They beat way to “take your mind off things” should be by doing something beneficial for yourself. Not by wasting away 5hrs a day on a game when you’re not anywhere near where you want to be in life. Might even be more dangerous that some drugs because you don’t think it’s that bad and it is, “keeping you from doing worse things…” only way I see it being good is helping with hand eye coordination and being a fun career if you are consistent and entertaining enough on social media or UA-cam. Hate to admit it but, in most cases, we aren’t doing anything with all that game time… 😕
Well said great video hit the nail on the head. Everyone experiences this
Wow great vid, very well spoken. Was that all one take?
American in the midwest. Just turned 27. Really resonated with me the losing core friends from jealousy and that. A few lifelong best buddies (since like elementary school) have been hurting lately. One got a bachelors in Sports Journalism and another in Graphic Design / engineering a couple years ago. Both were unable to get a job in their field and are underemployed at jobs that they hate. I was a late bloomer and just finished my associates in a medical imaging specialty and got a great job paying really well right out of school. I couldn't believe how hostile and distant they were on our annual canoe trip we do. Like all I care about is money and I fake love my wife and such because I've been grinding so much lately... I miss the simpler times of biking around town to get mountain dew and chips from the corner store before sleepovers..
You can still play videogames and drink with your friends, you simply won’t do it for the same amount of time that you used to.
What I get from this video is that people in the US live in a completely different reality compared to people from Europe. Here we almost have an habit of hanging out with your friends after work.
I used to feel this way to an extent until I realized it was a Me problem. I was living for me and neglecting connections with family and friends.
Isolating myself for the sake of progress. All it takes is to pick up the phone regularly and catch up regularly. Take the time to spend some time with those people in between periods of hard work.
I feel the same. I moved to a new city. I can't find new friends. I tried it a lot, but the most people you meet are like described in the video. I'm thinking to move again. On vacations in other cities people are way different.
I'm 30 and this was totally true for me! For a lot of reasons...
Damn getting this recommended 2 days before my 25th birthday is crazy
Honestly feel that. I’m just strolling through life right now. Absolutely lonely af. Work nights. Friends all gone. And I have 80k of student debt. It would take 1.5-2 years to pay it off if I through my paycheck into it every month. My birthday next few weeks and I honestly don’t know what to be happy about sometimes
Hang in there man hopefully it’ll get better for you soon just don’t give up
You're the dude from pysched substance! So glad I stumbled on this! Awesome video man!
cheers brother, glad you enjoyed