💯 I was told straight to my face that I don’t make enough money for the sista I was dating. She told me that and then stopped dating me. 14 months later I got my promotion and bought my house. I’m a happy, single, black male and that situation taught me a lot.
Your break down @48:37 on why women get left behind after the man “makes it” and leaves makes so much sense. Most women watch movies like “waiting to Exhale” thinking the man only leaves the woman after making it just because he get another, when really it’s about how they were treated by that woman while in the come up that she does not deserve the blessings when makes it.
The financial equity thing is cap. Women are not OK if he makes the same amount as they do and contributes the same amount to building the household. That’s the politically correct answer that they’re going to give so that they don’t seem unreasonable. At the end of the day if you make 50,000 and she makes 50,000 those numbers indicate to her that she does not have to be respectful to you. They will damn near be disrespectful if you cover 100% of the bills, but if she’s paying half and making half then she’s giving you half the respect and I’m not saying it’s fair. I’m just saying what I see.
I’m one of those good sistas out there who is not delusional about what is expected of me in a relationship with any man and I know that I have to bring a lot to the table in order for him to even consider me and I believe that building with a man signifies growth and potential in every aspect. I like how you explained that most black women are interested in the finished product and not willing to give any support to the man in order for him to bear fruit. Most black women do not believe in submission and teamwork because they believe in self sufficient attitudes. But I am not that way and I never was. I pour myself into my man because I believe in him and I champion his ability to want to grow and succeed.
This is the best explanation I've ever heard. I'm so done explaining this and will never expect a woman's support again. Don't ask me for nothing at the finish line that I'm very close to. Kendra, this one concept could change the community, but it will never happen. Thank you for all that you do!!!!!!!!
A lot of women have to be honest about the kind of men they’ve once invested in that led them to developing that negative mindset about building with a man. You gotta acknowledge your mistakes, take accountability, forgive yourself, learn the lesson, and do better next time ladies.
This was interesting. I feel that Dr. Umar has shown his tendency for pandering, but he said some interesting things here. First, he made her define every single term and talking point that she used. He also challenged a lot of the underlying assumptions that undergird these discussions that often send them off into the rails. By calling out these points and not letting them fly by unchecked, she was forced to put a context around her assertions. Also, it's funny how she sounded like a pre-recorded messaged that was set by social media by using terms like "provider" and "emotionally intelligent" that really wasn't a common part of the lexicon just 6 months ago. It's like hearing someone talking about "mental load" or "emotional labor".
Auntie, I miss your lives sometimes but I love to watch the playbacks to see all the hyenas and guyenas expose themselves in the chat. I love when you talk more about what a lioness (good woman/wife) does because I’m always seeking wisdom and want to be a better woman/wife/mother to my family. I have my flaws but I work hard to be better everyday. I truly love and appreciate the advice you give because I know it has helped me so much in my life. Thank you so much! You are greatly appreciated and loved by all lions and lionesses.
41:38 Dr. Umar said it jack!!!! And i sometimes have a hard time agreeing with some of the things he says sometimes but he hit the nail right on the head with that one!!!
The problem with a lot of Black women is that they tend to have TERRIBLE discernment. They’re clueless on how to pick out the men with actual potential. They invest all their time, energy or money into men who clearly lack focus, discipline or the ability to even achieve small goals. But maybe he had charisma and knew all the right things to make her believe in him. She then feels frustrated, resentful and duped that she invested all her money or energy into a man with no valuable return on her investment. When all of that could’ve been avoided had she simply paid more attention to what he DOES rather than what he says. If a White woman does eventually realize she made a mistake and invested in the wrong man, she’s not gonna make a huge drama about it. Shes also not gonna waste 10 years trying to mold him into the man she wants him to be. She’s most likely gonna say the relationship isn’t working out WITHOUT revealing to him the REAL reason for her disinterest. Black women are too straight forward and blunt to their own detriment sometimes. A Black woman will come right out and say it’s cause you’re broke and don’t make enough 😂, leaving an extra sour taste in that man’s mouth about women, particularly Black women.
This proves 💯 that these modern women are full of ish!! Because ppl put money into the things they believe in and they do so without questions asked. Modern women will still be in the "dating" stage of a relationship and DEMAND a man invest in her through: expensive dates, hair & nails, child care (single moms) candy, flowers, etc. All on the HOPE that love, respect, companionship etc will flow forth from their efforts. Yet Umar turns the equation upside down, for a woman to invest her money into a man's vision that may take time to become viable, but in the long run COULD benefit them both in the future. Not surprisingly her comes the hesitations, excuses and goal post moving. As Kevin said; "You CAN'T make this ish up!!!"
I think black women suffer from being educated but not having the wherewithall to understand that the same spaces that they are allowed in, particularly in academia/white collar settings, are often threatening/comtemptous for a black man to step foot in and that doesn't matter if they tout the environment as liberal or not. I work at an elite university and there are many black women but I am literally the only black man that works in my office which is comprised of many departments.
@@1ygj Toni Morrison addressed this in her segment of the "The Black List", a series of interviews with famous black people. She said, in the black community, fathers pushed their daughters to go to college, even if they couldnt send the sons. Often it was better bc women would get non-threatening, nuturing jobs like teacher, nurse etc. but they knew if they sent black men to college, black men would eventually want to go higher and push for raises which would be a testy posititon to place black men. So black people decided that we would move up via our women back then.
@@AC-ss5oyWell it’s traditional in our community for men to work with their hands…i.e. Plumber, Carpenter, Mechanic, Electrician, etc. Jobs that don’t require a college degree. Women traditionally don’t do those types of jobs thus they need to go to school in order to get a good job.
Tribalism is not a product of colonization.. it was literally there before. I don’t know why Americans think Africans view themselves as on big Black harmonious group. There’s literally hundreds of different tribes in every African country.. is tribes in Arab and middle eastern countries a part of colonialism too
We don’t think like that here in America because over here you’re “supposed”…..to be American FIRST then after that your tribe/nationality comes second….but we ALL know how that worked out for FBA’s 🤷🏾♂️
We don’t think like that here in America because over here your “supposed” to be American FIRST then after that your tribe/nationality comes second….but we ALL know how that works out for FBA’s
In this life i have had 2 women in my life from 2 different states, who were still one of a kind. they could be very pettie about any & everything. I have Never had A Good Woman, like you described
what i dont like about these conversations is the comparison to the wyte men. they're comparing a small % of privileged wyte men to average everyday bm. Even in australia, the average salary for men is about 60k USD.
Treating him Just like Taraji did her movie husband and once he is gone and has sold his machine and gets $ then she's stalking and making threats online 😂😂😂😂😂😂 Preach crim❤
Not really. I'd say he's shifting his "grift" towards the changing socio-political tides. Just like msnbc and other leftist media and entertainment organizations after this past election. The hyena gynocracy isn't as powerful or as profitable as it once was. He's pulling a Steven A Smith after this past election and adjusting his sails
There is an Nba player named Christian Wood or Woods. His girlfriend dumped him on draft night a few years ago because he didn't get drafted. That man worked his way to a multi million dollar contract years later. That's an example of how some women want a finished product
Please also talk about lionesses. God bless you. I need in the future guardians on how to vet and find a great wife. Please don't listen to the nay Sayers Thank you. Please up the great work
💯 I was told straight to my face that I don’t make enough money for the sista I was dating. She told me that and then stopped dating me. 14 months later I got my promotion and bought my house. I’m a happy, single, black male and that situation taught me a lot.
Your story sounds similar to my own. Instead of a promotion, I switched jobs for better pay.
Dodged a Bullet
Rejection is protection
I’m so happy and proud of you King! Drizzle Drizzle!!!
Your break down @48:37 on why women get left behind after the man “makes it” and leaves makes so much sense. Most women watch movies like “waiting to Exhale” thinking the man only leaves the woman after making it just because he get another, when really it’s about how they were treated by that woman while in the come up that she does not deserve the blessings when makes it.
💐
The financial equity thing is cap. Women are not OK if he makes the same amount as they do and contributes the same amount to building the household. That’s the politically correct answer that they’re going to give so that they don’t seem unreasonable. At the end of the day if you make 50,000 and she makes 50,000 those numbers indicate to her that she does not have to be respectful to you. They will damn near be disrespectful if you cover 100% of the bills, but if she’s paying half and making half then she’s giving you half the respect and I’m not saying it’s fair. I’m just saying what I see.
@yusufuadimu1209 FAQs
And that's where the passport comes in
That's a fact. That's why other races build strong communities while we are arguing over 50/50
Your take is realistic. Not fair but, realistic.
Sheraseven: "You ain't lying. Sprinkle Sprinkle". 😋😁
Vital information Mrs Kendra 🌷 Nothing is guaranteed when it comes to relationships. But hopefully, you vet the right person.
I’m one of those good sistas out there who is not delusional about what is expected of me in a relationship with any man and I know that I have to bring a lot to the table in order for him to even consider me and I believe that building with a man signifies growth and potential in every aspect. I like how you explained that most black women are interested in the finished product and not willing to give any support to the man in order for him to bear fruit. Most black women do not believe in submission and teamwork because they believe in self sufficient attitudes. But I am not that way and I never was. I pour myself into my man because I believe in him and I champion his ability to want to grow and succeed.
This is the best explanation I've ever heard. I'm so done explaining this and will never expect a woman's support again. Don't ask me for nothing at the finish line that I'm very close to.
Kendra, this one concept could change the community, but it will never happen.
Thank you for all that you do!!!!!!!!
A lot of women have to be honest about the kind of men they’ve once invested in that led them to developing that negative mindset about building with a man. You gotta acknowledge your mistakes, take accountability, forgive yourself, learn the lesson, and do better next time ladies.
So true. You can't choose flawed men and then think all Men are going to do the same thing to you
This was interesting. I feel that Dr. Umar has shown his tendency for pandering, but he said some interesting things here. First, he made her define every single term and talking point that she used. He also challenged a lot of the underlying assumptions that undergird these discussions that often send them off into the rails. By calling out these points and not letting them fly by unchecked, she was forced to put a context around her assertions.
Also, it's funny how she sounded like a pre-recorded messaged that was set by social media by using terms like "provider" and "emotionally intelligent" that really wasn't a common part of the lexicon just 6 months ago. It's like hearing someone talking about "mental load" or "emotional labor".
Yes to movie nights, reactions, and reviews.
Auntie,
I miss your lives sometimes but I love to watch the playbacks to see all the hyenas and guyenas expose themselves in the chat.
I love when you talk more about what a lioness (good woman/wife) does because I’m always seeking wisdom and want to be a better woman/wife/mother to my family. I have my flaws but I work hard to be better everyday. I truly love and appreciate the advice you give because I know it has helped me so much in my life.
Thank you so much! You are greatly appreciated and loved by all lions and lionesses.
Crimison Sister, you're on point. Keep up the good work. Dr. Umar on point as usual.
You should do the movie scene reaction I think that would be a good idea. Especially old school movies vs new school
41:38 Dr. Umar said it jack!!!! And i sometimes have a hard time agreeing with some of the things he says sometimes but he hit the nail right on the head with that one!!!
The problem with a lot of Black women is that they tend to have TERRIBLE discernment. They’re clueless on how to pick out the men with actual potential. They invest all their time, energy or money into men who clearly lack focus, discipline or the ability to even achieve small goals. But maybe he had charisma and knew all the right things to make her believe in him. She then feels frustrated, resentful and duped that she invested all her money or energy into a man with no valuable return on her investment. When all of that could’ve been avoided had she simply paid more attention to what he DOES rather than what he says.
If a White woman does eventually realize she made a mistake and invested in the wrong man, she’s not gonna make a huge drama about it. Shes also not gonna waste 10 years trying to mold him into the man she wants him to be. She’s most likely gonna say the relationship isn’t working out WITHOUT revealing to him the REAL reason for her disinterest. Black women are too straight forward and blunt to their own detriment sometimes. A Black woman will come right out and say it’s cause you’re broke and don’t make enough 😂, leaving an extra sour taste in that man’s mouth about women, particularly Black women.
No doubt. Good sisters do need to be shouted out more by us men. They do exist.
They exist, just like people who survive airplane crashes exist.
This proves 💯 that these modern women are full of ish!! Because ppl put money into the things they believe in and they do so without questions asked. Modern women will still be in the "dating" stage of a relationship and DEMAND a man invest in her through: expensive dates, hair & nails, child care (single moms) candy, flowers, etc. All on the HOPE that love, respect, companionship etc will flow forth from their efforts. Yet Umar turns the equation upside down, for a woman to invest her money into a man's vision that may take time to become viable, but in the long run COULD benefit them both in the future. Not surprisingly her comes the hesitations, excuses and goal post moving. As Kevin said; "You CAN'T make this ish up!!!"
A long, strong marriage comprises of two imperfect people that refuse to give up on one another!
Wisdom!!!
This video just proves that a lot of women don’t know the difference between building a man and building with a man
Black women have comprehension issues
I think black women suffer from being educated but not having the wherewithall to understand that the same spaces that they are allowed in, particularly in academia/white collar settings, are often threatening/comtemptous for a black man to step foot in and that doesn't matter if they tout the environment as liberal or not. I work at an elite university and there are many black women but I am literally the only black man that works in my office which is comprised of many departments.
The context that’s rarely addressed intentionally.
@@1ygj Toni Morrison addressed this in her segment of the "The Black List", a series of interviews with famous black people. She said, in the black community, fathers pushed their daughters to go to college, even if they couldnt send the sons. Often it was better bc women would get non-threatening, nuturing jobs like teacher, nurse etc. but they knew if they sent black men to college, black men would eventually want to go higher and push for raises which would be a testy posititon to place black men. So black people decided that we would move up via our women back then.
Indoctrination is not education
@@AC-ss5oyWell it’s traditional in our community for men to work with their hands…i.e. Plumber, Carpenter, Mechanic, Electrician, etc. Jobs that don’t require a college degree. Women traditionally don’t do those types of jobs thus they need to go to school in order to get a good job.
Tribalism is not a product of colonization.. it was literally there before. I don’t know why Americans think Africans view themselves as on big Black harmonious group. There’s literally hundreds of different tribes in every African country.. is tribes in Arab and middle eastern countries a part of colonialism too
I don't get why Americans think like that. Even in European (especially in Eastern Europe) and Asian countries some from of tribalism still exists.
We don’t think like that here in America because over here you’re “supposed”…..to be American FIRST then after that your tribe/nationality comes second….but we ALL know how that worked out for FBA’s 🤷🏾♂️
We don’t think like that here in America because over here your “supposed” to be American FIRST then after that your tribe/nationality comes second….but we ALL know how that works out for FBA’s
@@mrbdx Because FBAs are a mixture of tribes. TBH we are the true Americans because of that.
So called blk Americans are Indians of different tribes
I am coming to the understanding that today, these modern women of ours dont believe they are black women.
In this life i have had 2 women in my life from 2 different states, who were still one of a kind. they could be very pettie about any & everything. I have Never had A Good Woman, like you described
what i dont like about these conversations is the comparison to the wyte men. they're comparing a small % of privileged wyte men to average everyday bm. Even in australia, the average salary for men is about 60k USD.
The show fed my SOUL!!! Now how do I show this to the ladies in my life?!? 🤔😬
It wouldn't matter. Women will reject wisdom that doesn't pander to their feelings and emotions.
Treating him Just like Taraji did her movie husband and once he is gone and has sold his machine and gets $ then she's stalking and making threats online 😂😂😂😂😂😂 Preach crim❤
Umar is waking up
Not really. I'd say he's shifting his "grift" towards the changing socio-political tides. Just like msnbc and other leftist media and entertainment organizations after this past election. The hyena gynocracy isn't as powerful or as profitable as it once was.
He's pulling a Steven A Smith after this past election and adjusting his sails
This brother is not slow by any means. 😂. Not everyone has the guts nor conviction to just say things like they need to be said.
@@beaboutpeaceandpleasure9230not by a long shot he know wassup he not slow at all 😂
If you're expected to bless your enemies, you can never be used. Still be careful. But, if you slip, sow it as seed and God will bless your kindness.
Your movies reactions are always OP.
@@Baraka-z9f my favorite is when she broke down black panther 2
Once he holds women accountable and not pander to them he will be highly regarded.I regard him but the pandering to black women I can't rock with.
There is an Nba player named Christian Wood or Woods. His girlfriend dumped him on draft night a few years ago because he didn't get drafted. That man worked his way to a multi million dollar contract years later. That's an example of how some women want a finished product
That tether kameleon CHICK K got owned xD
If men applied the financial equity rule to relationships, how many men be married 😅
Weak men just can't rise to the expectations of a high vibing women especially if all they do is act as an antagonist to us. Keep it stepping Bro!
Yes husband or wife 👌🏿
01:05:27 to 01:05:45 to 01:05:51 👍🔮
Movie reactions would be good.
24:13 Its your channel The Crimson Cure, And i say you can not only talk about it. I think it should be spoken and talked about!!! And 24:45
I hope you do movie night, big sis, and i have a movie or show for you, "accused" season 2 ep 8 meghan story
Excellent point The Crimson Cure... excellent point!!!! 19:00
Please also talk about lionesses. God bless you. I need in the future guardians on how to vet and find a great wife. Please don't listen to the nay Sayers
Thank you.
Please up the great work