Betty Hart: How compassion could save your strained relationships | TED

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  • Опубліковано 25 бер 2021
  • When personal relationships and ideological differences collide, the result can lead to strained relations -- or even years of silence and distance. Actor Betty Hart offers an alternative to cold shoulders and haughty hellos: compassion, and a chance for growth and change instead of losing important time with loved ones.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 126

  • @javaman666
    @javaman666 3 роки тому +58

    Her voice and how to pronunciate is so clear in every word. It is makes me easy to understand as an English learner.

  • @haleycomer112395
    @haleycomer112395 3 роки тому +50

    don’t let this justify any kind of abuse. physically, mentally or spiritually.

    • @laurelmcphee793
      @laurelmcphee793 3 роки тому +5

      There is no way you could spin what she said into justifying abuse...

    • @haleycomer112395
      @haleycomer112395 3 роки тому +8

      @@laurelmcphee793 someone who is watching this that may be getting abused could then use the things she says to justify the things that are happening to them.

    • @detalker.net_
      @detalker.net_ 2 роки тому

      @@haleycomer112395 true

    • @renjia3504
      @renjia3504 Рік тому

      I left my abusive ho fr fr

  • @ContraryMary
    @ContraryMary 3 роки тому +27

    I found, after 35 years, that life is short, and I've suffered long enough. Time to start living. Sometimes its not about love - its about chosing life and not sinking because of one person for the rest of your life.

  • @nektariak4212
    @nektariak4212 3 роки тому +158

    Just a reminder that you shouldn’t try compassionate culture with abusive people (emotionally or physically). You deserve better, it’s not your job to “fix” them. Get your distance please and focus on your mental and physical health. I’m a person with sociopathic parents. Try showing them some empathy. They take it all, never get tired of getting, but they won’t give you anything in return. Not all people change. And for the ones who do, let’s meet them again when they have already changed.

  • @serenitynow9980
    @serenitynow9980 3 роки тому +29

    "Carry out a random act of kindness with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you." ~Princess Diana

  • @rastaboo3607
    @rastaboo3607 3 роки тому +55

    One of my favourite Ted talks. Holy cow the power in her message and voice. 💚

  • @srinidhishegde6060
    @srinidhishegde6060 3 роки тому +19

    I want to improve my relationship with my sister..I WILL TRY HARD AND TRY TO MAKE A CHANGE.

  • @carlalatraveler
    @carlalatraveler 5 місяців тому +1

    This is one of the most amazing TED talks I’ve listened to. Thank you 🙏🏽

  • @vthilton
    @vthilton 3 роки тому +7

    Truth, Love and Peace for All.

  • @iferren
    @iferren 3 роки тому +24

    Thats way it feels bad to cancell someone. And it feels good to forgive

    • @joannot6706
      @joannot6706 3 роки тому

      I talk from experience telling you the opposite is usually true.

    • @iferren
      @iferren 3 роки тому +2

      @@joannot6706 It always depend on the case. (E.g. Abusive people). Inside your mind and body knows the truth and it has been cientifically proven the benefits of forgiveness.

  • @charlesmahao3522
    @charlesmahao3522 9 місяців тому +1

    This is one of the mpst profound and well spoken topics i have ever heard! Absolutely beautiful ❤️

  • @nielbezuidenhout1074
    @nielbezuidenhout1074 3 роки тому +19

    May an increased understanding of the value of compassion on a personal level, also help us to shape a society in which we will be open minded to diverse thoughts and solutions.

  • @Mykindyrella
    @Mykindyrella 3 роки тому +6

    She is indeed a seed of influence. Awesome and powerful talk. 👏🏼

  • @yolandaponkers1581
    @yolandaponkers1581 3 роки тому +1

    I absolutely adore her outlook! We need a world of Bettys.

  • @linnenglish2335
    @linnenglish2335 3 роки тому +11

    Me in my teenage years would've completely disagreed with this woman, but me right now can totally feel this

    • @renjia3504
      @renjia3504 2 роки тому +2

      Every girl expects a knight, it's hard for every guy to meet those criteria

    • @shreeshiva9421
      @shreeshiva9421 Рік тому +2

      @@renjia3504 : and not every girl deserves the knight and not every girl is a lady. U didn't mention so I thought to do that 😉

  • @CaisdasLetras
    @CaisdasLetras 3 роки тому +2

    Fantastic! This is now one of my favorite Ted talks. This needs to be spread and performed!

  • @user-sn9cu9ef4o
    @user-sn9cu9ef4o 3 роки тому +6

    Thank you very much for changing my mindset

  • @RayWalker-pythonic
    @RayWalker-pythonic 3 роки тому +1

    I love this talk. Really inspiring.

  • @punnaroothsrimongkolsilp6279
    @punnaroothsrimongkolsilp6279 3 роки тому +11

    Thank you so much for teaching me :)

  • @unregierbar7694
    @unregierbar7694 3 роки тому +3

    She is right. Compassion and harmony fall short nowadays.

  • @stefannikola
    @stefannikola 3 роки тому +23

    There's a point at which compassion runs out. Abundant compassion can become an opportunity and permission to offend again. There's nothing wrong with separating yourself from abusive people.

    • @raystyles1045
      @raystyles1045 3 роки тому +2

      With like a hundred wars going on around the world how do you think we're doing so far with old ways of thinking ? Quote from the late Dave Allen let your God go with you.

  • @selay5998
    @selay5998 3 роки тому +4

    Mrs Hart you are inspiring!

  • @wangui9944
    @wangui9944 3 роки тому +1

    Really blessed by this💕

  • @tinadawson3231
    @tinadawson3231 Рік тому

    Thank you!

  • @SaltyCuban
    @SaltyCuban 3 роки тому +17

    How about acceptance culture. Accepting true diversity manifesting itself as diverse thought and opinions.
    Thank you Betty. For reminding folks of the options we have.
    Cancel culture must end.
    Otherwise our society is doomed to fail.

  • @veApolo
    @veApolo 3 роки тому +2

    What a powerful and open eyes' message. Plant s seed with the best intention that you will help someone else.... We can make it true.

    • @therichest7879
      @therichest7879 3 роки тому

      W/H/A/T/S/A/P/P
      +/1/2/1/3/2/6/0/4/8/9/5
      I/N/V/E/S/T/ IN B/T/C
      AND E/T/H========

  • @richardcranium8408
    @richardcranium8408 3 роки тому +8

    “Amor Fati” beautifully explained again.

  • @GBisht111
    @GBisht111 Рік тому +1

    Be compassionate but do not stay in abuse - In case of Abuse compassion needs to start with yourself first. This is the only difference . Be Love ❤

  • @MissPocketRocket333
    @MissPocketRocket333 2 роки тому

    Beautiful x

  • @angelbrigg
    @angelbrigg 3 роки тому +6

    Wonderful talk and she looks fabulous in that dress!

  • @riccardorizzoli
    @riccardorizzoli 3 роки тому

    i'm crying

  • @albatross_edits
    @albatross_edits 3 роки тому +2

    I got it what she meant... thanks .. good influence... Amazing and emotional talk

    • @therichest7879
      @therichest7879 3 роки тому +1

      *T>>H>>A>>N>>K>>S F>>O>>R W>>A>>T>>C>>H>>I>>N>>G*
      *T>>O M>>A>>K>>E A G>>O>>O>>D* *T>>R>>A>>D>>E*
      *I>>N C>>R>>Y>>P>>T>>O C>>U>>R>>R>>E>>N>>C>>Y*
      *W>>H>>A>>T>>S>>A>>>P>P*
      *+=^1=^2=^1=^3=^2=^6=^0=^4=^8=^9=^5*

  • @CLEANDrumCovers
    @CLEANDrumCovers 3 роки тому +7

    Yes, we need to talk more about this. Cancel culture is toxic and not part of the society we would like to live in.

    • @abrahampalmer8761
      @abrahampalmer8761 Рік тому +1

      Exactly it makes it worse for everyone and it does so much damage without people realizing that.

  • @qubaliclife4666
    @qubaliclife4666 3 роки тому +16

    For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Ephesians 6:12

  • @iknowashortcut6503
    @iknowashortcut6503 Рік тому

    What a strong woman. I like her.

  • @shwetavaswani9593
    @shwetavaswani9593 3 роки тому +2

    Totally worthy✨

    • @therichest7879
      @therichest7879 3 роки тому

      W/H/A/T/S/A/P/P
      +/1/2/1/3/2/6/0/4/8/9/5
      I/N/V/E/S/T/ IN B/T/C
      AND E/T/H========

  • @sofiagusniacb5896
    @sofiagusniacb5896 3 роки тому

    To plant seed of change... Interesting talk

  • @MillersLanguageSchool
    @MillersLanguageSchool 3 роки тому +4

    *Compassion is the path of the righteous, it is not available to everyone. Compassion makes a person vulnerable.*

  • @walburchamanazakanian2817
    @walburchamanazakanian2817 3 роки тому +5

    oh my god, this just made me cry (in a positive sense)!! It was such an empowering talk! :)

  • @mssassy6129
    @mssassy6129 3 роки тому +1

    Compassion is radical now. Sad...Powerful talk.

  • @ottahosondu6001
    @ottahosondu6001 3 роки тому +39

    We need to cancel the cancel culture.

    • @abrahampalmer8761
      @abrahampalmer8761 Рік тому

      Tbh I'm so sick of it at this point it doesn't help anyone it makes it worse

  • @sanvet1235
    @sanvet1235 3 роки тому

    Wow amazing. Love from indonesian

  • @DrMjVeterinarian
    @DrMjVeterinarian 3 роки тому +2

    💖

  • @josefshopovich7584
    @josefshopovich7584 3 роки тому +13

    It's important to close the eyes on the things we don't like, if we want to live a peaceful and happy life.

    • @georgewilliams1097
      @georgewilliams1097 3 роки тому +9

      Thats a stupid concept.
      If you don't open yourself up to the things you disagree with then you reach a box of seclusion and ignorance and if you stay in that box you gain a massive ego even for being wrong but if you open yourself up to things you can understand more,widen your views and become more intelligent

    • @josefshopovich7584
      @josefshopovich7584 3 роки тому +2

      @@InMaTeofDeath ah.. That's exaggerating. I'm talking about family gathering.

    • @ruinfirefly2088
      @ruinfirefly2088 3 роки тому

      @@georgewilliams1097 That's such a well written thought

  • @rochekeenmanalaysay5454
    @rochekeenmanalaysay5454 3 роки тому

    Big Heart...😘

  • @evolutionxbox
    @evolutionxbox 3 роки тому +1

    powerful

  • @kantudhanmeher5950
    @kantudhanmeher5950 3 роки тому

  • @dm20422
    @dm20422 3 роки тому

  • @alerio369
    @alerio369 Рік тому

    Emphasis on the ones we love

  • @muhammadbello9341
    @muhammadbello9341 3 роки тому

    He's right, you're beautiful .

  • @Anipor992
    @Anipor992 3 роки тому +4

    How if they don’t see and feel any compassion!

    • @izaakthoms
      @izaakthoms 3 роки тому +9

      it doesn’t need to go both ways. Walk in others shoes and learn their experiences. Then they are faced with choice of accepting compassion or not.

  • @ACB2K
    @ACB2K 3 роки тому

    I had to hear this today 3.28.21. THANKS

  • @raystyles1045
    @raystyles1045 3 роки тому

    Any thing is possible

    • @therichest7879
      @therichest7879 3 роки тому

      W/H/A/T/S/A/P/P
      +/1/2/1/3/2/6/0/4/8/9/5
      I/N/V/E/S/T/ IN B/T/C
      AND E/T/H========

  • @compassiontools2069
    @compassiontools2069 Рік тому

    Not only relationships but the whole world I would say

  • @ruggedg23
    @ruggedg23 3 роки тому +14

    We are at a crossroads here that compassion stuff will leave you open to narcissistic abuse, scam artist and manipulation. The cancel culture stuff will eliminate freedom, free thought and individuality. Just be the best you you can be and hope for the best.

  • @rochekeenmanalaysay5454
    @rochekeenmanalaysay5454 3 роки тому +4

    Respect...

  • @captainjames4649
    @captainjames4649 3 роки тому +1

    thats how it works

  • @Project-js7mu
    @Project-js7mu 3 роки тому +1

    Im commenting

  • @user-mb6oy1hm7w
    @user-mb6oy1hm7w 3 роки тому

    Maybe we can make an app to pick a phone call in mute untill we need to aplly

  • @eetogt3318
    @eetogt3318 3 роки тому

    Athinenna chechieeeee

  • @scatton61
    @scatton61 3 роки тому +2

    I am so glad that you have discovered compassion. Not new, people have been doing it for 100,000s of years. Although suffering alongside someone sounds a bit silly... you can sympathise and understand other people's point of view without the suffering. Not quite sure why this is a TED talk..

  • @nhatthan7154
    @nhatthan7154 3 роки тому

    Hi

    • @therichest7879
      @therichest7879 3 роки тому

      *T>>H>>A>>N>>K>>S F>>O>>R W>>A>>T>>C>>H>>I>>N>>G*
      *T>>O M>>A>>K>>E A G>>O>>O>>D* *T>>R>>A>>D>>E*
      *I>>N C>>R>>Y>>P>>T>>O C>>U>>R>>R>>E>>N>>C>>Y*
      *W>>H>>A>>T>>S>>A>>>P>P*
      *+=^1=^2=^1=^3=^2=^6=^0=^4=^8=^9=^5*

  • @arihantgupta790
    @arihantgupta790 3 роки тому

    Niceeeeee

  • @beatricehart5614
    @beatricehart5614 3 роки тому +2

    I appreciate her message but you can't suffer with someone who wants to deny or jeopardize your human rights.

  • @Mystefier
    @Mystefier 2 роки тому

    I needed to see this. I've been really angry lately about how so many charities exclude men in the people they offer help to and I've been hearing people say that it's because of an empathy gap (that society does not have empathy for men.) So maybe there are problems, but I wanted to resist getting resentful toward women, because I know this is a problem with politicians, but not women, so I looked up to see examples of women showing empathy and compassion toward men, and this lady is a great example of that. It was so wonderful to hear her perspective and to keep up my faith in humanity.

  • @brooksnation4667
    @brooksnation4667 3 роки тому +1

    Pog

  • @aeriumfour6096
    @aeriumfour6096 3 роки тому +6

    When you have been effectively locked up together for a year straight, almost any relationship will be strained, compassion isn't the solution when Covid has destroyed your general appreciation of or ability to put up with another person.

    • @jaywhoisit4863
      @jaywhoisit4863 3 роки тому

      I’m much closer with my family since lockdown. We just enjoy each other and actually have time for one another. It’s been a blessing for us.

    • @aeriumfour6096
      @aeriumfour6096 3 роки тому +1

      @@jaywhoisit4863 Absolutely, it works fine for people with a lot in common and aren't holding onto any grudges or annoyances.
      For those that do, it's been catastrophic.

  • @josephcasley7979
    @josephcasley7979 Рік тому

    This is music to my heart or should that be soul?

  • @offbeatmoonknight
    @offbeatmoonknight 3 роки тому

    goood gig after avengers!

  • @AMDNEWS0
    @AMDNEWS0 3 роки тому +1

    Me first

  • @HisDishonorTheMayor
    @HisDishonorTheMayor 9 місяців тому

    Kind words, but this is wishful thinking at best. We can only be so empathetic and understanding to people until we’re pushed past the point where we can’t be anymore.

  • @sanjaymourya6838
    @sanjaymourya6838 3 роки тому +1

    Cancel cancel culture... Everything will sort out...

  • @xananacs
    @xananacs 3 роки тому +2

    Meh. Just made me feel bad for pushing back against my abusers.
    Planted the seed fourteen million times.
    If the message had worth, it should come with a ton of warnings and maybes.

  • @pavilionman64
    @pavilionman64 3 роки тому

    She looks like that women from Wakanda

  • @ukaszstec470
    @ukaszstec470 3 роки тому +5

    Why do you assume grandpa needs to change and not you? He has much more life experience.

    • @raqueeeel1000
      @raqueeeel1000 3 роки тому +6

      As we continue to advance as a society there are new concepts that we learn that grandpa might not have learned in his lifetime. That is why discussion and compassion will allow each side to learn and perhaps grow.

  • @Mountain_Drew
    @Mountain_Drew 3 роки тому +1

    I know why some people clicked on this video.

    • @therichest7879
      @therichest7879 3 роки тому

      *T>>H>>A>>N>>K>>S F>>O>>R W>>A>>T>>C>>H>>I>>N>>G*
      *T>>O M>>A>>K>>E A G>>O>>O>>D* *T>>R>>A>>D>>E*
      *I>>N C>>R>>Y>>P>>T>>O C>>U>>R>>R>>E>>N>>C>>Y*
      *W>>H>>A>>T>>S>>A>>>P>P*
      *+=^1=^2=^1=^3=^2=^6=^0=^4=^8=^9=^5*

  • @ramo.d1329
    @ramo.d1329 3 роки тому

    türk var mi?

  • @eternitynaut
    @eternitynaut 3 роки тому

    Can you fork the channel with videos geared more towards technology and science vs entertainment and social videos like this?

  • @dgpaul16
    @dgpaul16 3 роки тому

    Sorry, Ma'am, you go ahead and keep enjoying all the suffering. Have fun.

    • @therichest7879
      @therichest7879 3 роки тому

      W/H/A/T/S/A/P/P
      +/1/2/1/3/2/6/0/4/8/9/5
      I/N/V/E/S/T/ IN B/T/C
      AND E/T/H========

  • @rileys-lost1673
    @rileys-lost1673 3 роки тому +13

    This is the most liked comment for no reason

  • @sunnyrobinson2128
    @sunnyrobinson2128 3 роки тому

    Now they are trying to cancel Destiny's child "Cater To You" 😔SMH cancelling love for man😔🎯

  • @rosemarrychurch3247
    @rosemarrychurch3247 3 роки тому

    “The investor’s chief problem - and even his worst enemy - is likely to be himself.”Earn 40,000$ every week from your own investment . Ask me how.

  • @vickyrichardson5287
    @vickyrichardson5287 3 роки тому +2

    Nope. You don’t understand toxic people. You are assuming that some of us haven’t suffered enough.

  • @dooshmasta
    @dooshmasta 3 роки тому +2

    She doesn’t even have hair. What can she teach me?