when you said "vriendje" it really hit me hard. I'm dutch too and hearing it in our language made it so real and emotional to me. My heart literally sank.
12:26. "I think the hardest thing for both me and my family is that we dont really have the feeling that he's gone yet... ...but to us, it pretty much still feels like he's on holiday with friends. And he can come home any second now. Like we're all just looking at the door like okay any-any second now, come back now. We miss you. " Man, i cried.
I believe it was your brother. I'd be thinking the same way, it's comforting for the grieving process. I'm so sorry for you and your family's loss. You take all the time you need girl, we love you.
I never thought I would actually cry because of a Nikkie Tutorials video. Nikkie, you’re so strong and we as your UA-cam family will always love and support you. I’m sure I speak for a lot of us when I say I’m glad you took a couple weeks off. Healing is important. We all love you Nikkie, and we’ll all support you however we can, as well as wearing as much red as we can.
The first time I watched this video, my heart broke for you and your family. Now, my heart breaks with you, as I lost my little brother recently, too. He had just turned 18 and was so happy and healthy... But he went to bed one night and he never woke up again. Allow me to say how sorry I am that you had to go through that kind of tragedy, and that I completely understand the pain and devastation that comes with losing a young sibling. It has been a few weeks now and I still expect him to come walking down the hall, or I'll tiptoe around the house late at night so I don't wake him. Remembering he's gone is always like a slap in the face from reality. But what has kept me going and been a comfort to me is knowing that everything I accomplish in life will be to honor him and his love of life. I am sure Mikai is so, so proud of you Nikkie! ❤️
@@cristianb9557 It definitely does. Losing a relative you're close to (especially a younger sibling) is like losing a part of yourself. It's losing a whole future that intertwined with your own. Thank you for your sentiments ❤️
Omg! I wore a denim shirt and red skirt today with a monochromatic red makeup. Your little brother is definitely up to something leaving signs all over the world. What a beautiful tribute to him with this video!
It’s December 7 2018. Today I found out my math teacher committed suicide. I went home and did my makeup four times in his favorite colors. Makeup is truly a therapy.
Definitely your little brother letting you know that he is with you. He is just somewhere different now... somewhere we can't understand or comprehend. His body may be gone, but HE can never die. He's just taking another journey now, the same journey we will all eventually take. So, let us cherish our time here and look forward to our time there, with the ones who have gone before us...
My father died in May 2004 and about 4 years later we adopted our first cat Teddy who was, as we later found out, born on the exact day my dad died and was also 4 years old when we got him. I always think that my father kind of send him to us to keep us company and be by our side.
I am here after reading that today was his 16th. Your brother would be so proud of where you are now. Also he would be so proud that you came out even without will. Love you Nikkie
Natalie I love how when I look at the comments of a UA-camr’s video you are always saying kind words of positivity. I have noticed this on not just a few UA-camr’s videos but more then a dozen.
When my Nana passed away, I was at summer camp. The night she went, I had an incredibly vivid dream about her hugging me and saying "I love you, mija." I woke up feeling more rested and calm than I had all week. I found out at breakfast that she had passed in the night, and I genuinely think she came to say goodbye before moving on.
I had the exact SAME dreams about my Aunt and my Grandad when they both passed away, it's so surreal !! but its some-what comforting at the same time..
I understand, my grandpa passed away a few months ago, and it still hasn’t set in. I feel like I can still just go up to his house, knock on the door, and he will open the door with open arms, and hug me. But thinking that I can’t see him ever again, just breaks my heart and I haven’t come to accept his passing. Hang in there, we can go through this together. ❤️
Woot Woot i lost my granny 4 years ago and I just wanted to say that you are never alone and there will always be people to talk to, it does get better but it takes time. You are in my prayers and I’m really sorry for your loss ❤️
Same. My grandpa passed away 4 months ago and I still hope I will hear his voice calling me to eat or just hear his laugh. Hard to accept but we can make it through. 💓
hope you’re ok. And if not, i hope you feel better soon. I know Words aren’t enough but i truly hope so. Loss is the biggest pain one can feel in his or her life. And keep on going, i’m sure he would be proud of how far you’ll come in live. May he rest in piece💓
Ik how you feel, my grandpa passed away when I was 6 I’m 11 now and still haven’t gotten over it I keep gold coins because he used to call me his golden coins I miss him a lot and I hate myself for not telling him how much I loved him😔
I’m seriously not okay from this. I held my son so tight. I’m so sorry that this happened. It’s okay to cry, it’s okay to be emotional Nikkie we all understand don’t apologize, its okay to cry on camera, we’re all with you
I can truly understand that "It hasn't hit us yet feeling". My childhood (and adulthood) best friend past this past December. And while it's already been 6 months, there are STILL times where I don't really quite feel it, feel it. I keep thinking "Oh, he's just out of town." "He'll come back from Philly soon." "Can't wait til he's back in town." kinda feelings. Only when I scroll past his name unexpectedly in my phone or on social media, etc, does it sock me with the reality, but in my mind, I just keep thinking he's just out of touch, not...gone. I truly feel for you and my heart is heavy with you.
Mmph, I'm really feeling for you both, Jamee and Tui. It's such a surreal feeling. I've lost a lot of friends in my relatively short life, but some just are so meaningful your brain just can't truly accept they're gone. I'm sending you all my whole heart.
Got goosebumps when she was talking about the stuff that happened when he passed away, and the balloons. I totally believe in that stuff. Love you Nikkie.
Me too, I really think those things were God showing them that her brother was safe. I've had many experiences like that myself when family members have passed
Payton B me too. It’s awesome. It gives kind of a feeling relief. It happened to me, when we were driving past the death site of my friend. A song came on that we sang together in karaoke and then after that song it was a song about angels.
I am so very sorry for your loss Nikki. You had me crying 10 seconds into this video. It really hit home. I lost my brother a few years ago because of a drunk driver. The pain of them being gone never goes away. Whoever said time heals lied! They lied lied lied!!! I'm still waiting for him to walk through the door. Just know that he is always with you. These brothers of our protected us while they were here and will continue to every day of our lives. Love you so much beautiful. Keeping you and your little brother in my thoughts and prayers ❤
I cried the whole time I kept watching you and I could only think about your brother I totally think those were all signs and I’ll be praying for you and your family
Damn, at the end of this video when you almost cried I wanted to cry too. I’m so sorry for your lost. I know exactly how it feels to lost someone you loved. I hope you’ll feel better. Stay strong Nikkie, I love you ❤️
Hi pretty! I just want to say that I understand you, my father died of cancer many years ago ... And I say with all my heart that your brother did not lose the fight against the disease, he won because he had the courage to fight. A person who chooses to live is a winner but God has plans for us all. Your brother will always be a warrior just like my father. He smiles at you from paradise.
my grandpa had cancer and had ended up in a coma for a couple of days. one night, i had called my mom and told her to put the phone on speaker and set it by him. i was talking to him about my day and telling him he needed to get better. before i hung up, i told him i loved him and he responded with “i love you too, macy”. he hadn’t spoken for days, but he answered me. the next morning, he passed away. he was definitely my best friend and i was blessed to be the last person he talked to. times like these are rough, but they will get easier with time. everything is in god’s hands and he never does anything without having a reason behind it!
macy fletcher may God bless your dear grandpa 💙🤲🏼 To you my dear you are absolutely right God Always have a reason for everything that happens in our lives we must never lose faith & trust in God. 💙💕 May God comfort you & all those who have loss someone ♥️
I'm so sorry Nikkie. I also use makeup and various arts for therapy and its very helpful. I wish you the best healing process and I wish your brother a peaceful rest. We're always gonna be here for you and we love you! 💞💞
okay i got chills at 2:38. i believe that was your brothers way of telling you he's okay and to pursue your dream... i know this video is old but i never got around to watching it until now. what a blessing
I am truly sorry for your loss. I can't imagine the heartache that you have endured and still are enduring. Your baby brother's memory will live forever through you and yes, I absolutely believe that he had a hand in the timing of the balloons and you hitting 10 million subs! Congratulations! 🎊
We Love You, Dear Nikkie. Your Beloved Brother Is In Heaven, playing with my Beloved Son, whose favorite color is also red. This week, I will wear red to honor them both. God Bless You and Peace, Love and Comfort to You and Your Family Always.
this was so beautiful i'm tearing up you're such a strong soul to be able to look to the positive side and continue being happy despite of the loss you experienced.. i truly admire you
It sure was your brother! He will continue to let know he's around you just listen. It's so comforting when you feel the departed with you. I'm so sorry for your loss. And congratulations on 10m! Love you !
What Nikkie said about the dog is soo true. Because dogs can see and feel when the soul leaves the body. And her mom’s dog knew that her little brother is dying thats why he went crazy
When our physical body dies we still have another body that looks exactly the same as our physical body it is called the astral body. It is also know as the prana body or life force body (energy body). When someone dies young his energy body is still very lively and energetic, for those people who can see astral bodies they call it a ghost. Dogs can see ghost, sometimes they start to bark when they see a ghost. Actually we are all ghosts trapped in a physical body, but we don't call it ghost we call it soul or spirit. A human being has a body and a soul. When we die the souls leaves the body and goes to some other place. After some resting period he will be reborn in a new body. 🙏💖
Nikkie your family is in my prayers. I cried so much through this. As a cancer survivor who has lost close friends from it I know how hard it is. It does feel like they’ll come home. My friends deaths don’t feel real at all.
I am sorry for your loss.♡ Today is actually the "first anniversary" of my uncle's death, after he fought cancer for 4 years. I still think about him every single day, but it gets easier..
My dad passed in January. It doesn’t hit you at first that they’re gone, it’s like you’re still expecting them to walk in the room. It’s almost harder when it sinks in they aren’t coming back. Definitely one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to go through! Love and light to you NIKKIE!!♥️💕♥️
It’s so hard. I lost my grandfather who raised me last year. Some of my family member said he wasn’t great but for me, he is amazing. I’m always grateful for him raising me and loving me so much.
I definitely believe in the “little signs” as I’m watching this I wanna cry and I’m so proud of u for staying strong. At the end u say “let’s wear something red” and out of all the days I’m wearing a red shirt ❤️.. may he Rest In Peace and the Lord comfort you and your family in this time. Xoxo
I've gotten here far to late, and I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm glad he's out of pain and not suffering, though. I'm sure he fought incredibly hard. While I'm not sure what I believe, I do know my grandma has been with me since she passed. Ever since, no matter where I go, there are constantly birds (something she watched out the windows a lot after a leg amputation) sitting outside my windows. When I have complete break downs, and I sit outside, typically a blue jay will sit near me and squawk insistently. The little shits will sit there until I laugh about it, and then take off. I kind of believe it's my grandmother watching over me, letting me know I am still okay, even when things look grey.
I think.. that we’re all allowed to think and believe what we want to believe, and we’re all allowed to grieve in whatever way we want to, in whatever way we can. ❤️
Although I know your channel I don't really watch your videos but I came across to this video and just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your lost. So many of us lost someone precious to us and we know how you feel. Stay strong!
I tried not to cry, because I have also lost someone special to cancer. It was about 2 weeks ago when i lost my mom. Just know that your brother will always be there for you. And we, your subscribers, will be also. Sending love ❤️
When my father moved on from this life after a battle with cancer, the moment he left us in the middle of the night, my mom was suddenly woken from a deep sleep and knew he had gone. She said it was as if his spirit passed through her to say "see you later in Heaven." That was 3 years ago, and I can say, without a doubt, that I still feel like he's on a trip to the store and I'm waiting for him to come back. I honestly don't think the feeling of them being gone ever fully sinks in, as emotionally, I'm still somehow waiting to see him come home. It doesn't get easier, it just gets different. Praying for peace for you and your family.
Spankie Valentine TV I'm so sorry you've lost a parent to! It's the hardest thing I've ever gone threw losing my Mom. She passed away of a sudden heart attack in her sleep totally unexpected and two days before she passed I had a dream I lost both parents and woke up balling my eyes out, the day my Mom passed replays in my mind like a movie and makes me sick the second I think about it. It's terrfying but I totally understand what you mean about feeling like there gone away on a trip about to come back anytime. I can feel her watching over me there was some really weird things that happened to me and my finace right after she passed that I knew in my heart was her. I pray you and you're family are doing ok after such a tragic thing!
Spankie Valentine TV so sorry for your lost I know there are no words that can console someone I know it because I lost my dad as well it was hard to believe that he isn't here anymore but I know his in another place and so is your dad.
You’re so strong Nikki. Like your brother. And i bet he is watching this video with a smile and is thanking you. May he rest in peace. And we as your community are supporting you and love you 🙏🏻❤️
Dogs are super intune with humans they love. I totally believe that our loved ones try to let us know that have moved on and are alright. Love you bunches! I will send up prayers for you and your family!
Seeing this makes me think of my 3 younger siblings, they are my life and i tried not to cry when you said that mikai was watching you from heaven, supporting you. Im sure hes feeling very well where he is right now.
I lost my brother back in 2008 to a tragic accident so I know what you’re going through, my heart and prayers is going out to you and your family ❤️ All of your subscribers admire how strong you are. Your brother will be with you for the rest of your life looking over you and being so proud of your success. I 100% believe that the situations that happened were NOT by chance, it absolutely was your brother telling you he is at peace. Such a beautiful video in his honour. We love you Nikkie. May he Rest In Peace xo
I lost my grandparents and aunt in accident many years ago. When we spread their ashes 3 birds flew right over head. It might be nothing but that moment always stuck with me. Over years we always see 3 birds at important events like weddings for the grandchildren. I think each person can believe what they need to deal and move forward, nobody can tell you whether it is true or not.
I don’t even know what to tell you about your loss. I lost my aunt to cancer last year, and although I can’t understand what you and your family must be going through, I can at least relate. One thing I know by experience is; there is nothing that can ease the pain. There is nothing that will you make you miss him less. But know that he IS happy right now, he IS in a much better place. So for his sake, life will go on. And you will do things in life, to make him proud. Congratulations on the 10 million. Love you, always.💖
I almost lost my little brother twice and it’s terrifying thinking about what if he was gone and I’m sorry that you lost your little brother.... I can’t see loosing my brother and I love how your staying so strong talking about this.
He is with you Nikkie, he never left, remember that, he will always stay and watch over you. It's not weird it's not strange,the things you shared about your family were truly signs, people can have them in a very different way like a dream while they sleep of someone they love saying goodbye or more....it can happen very differently, so it is true and you are right to believe that it was you little brother. With the signs he gave to you it shows how strong of a soul he is and I believe he's happy and at rest now and he will always be there for you, you have to know that. Stay strong and don't forget to smile for him. God bless! Much of love!
one thing i learnt from this, whenever we lose someone, we should focus on their life, and not the death. of course the human breain naturally pays attention to negativity more, but we should focus on the positive eg the things we learnt from that person, the good memories, and treasure the moments well spent! and i love how positive you are here, bless you!
Can’t believe it, haven’t even meet you in real life and u made me cry, really emocional video, congratulations for everything you have reach in you life girl, u touch my heart, I’m so pround and happy for you ♥️
Cry Nikkie. Let it all out. Im crying with you. I remember when you first told us, I can't even imagine how much you're hurting right now. My uncle has cancer and is getting treatment, luckily it isn't a cancer that will spread. We are so proud of you.
As a sister of four little brothers ... I cry. Still so so so sorry for your and your family 's loss. Hugs and kisses and all my love for you sweetheart!
My mom passed a year ago, I just watched this video and related so much to you. For about 6 months after she passed my constant feeling was “she’s on vacation, she’ll be back soon”. This is how I explain loss to everyone. I was strong through the whole video until you did the tribute at the end. My heart hurts for you and it never gets easier we just get stronger! ❤️
You're so strong and resilient. I've been watching you since you were 16 and your talent and creativity is truly endless and amazing! I'm so sorry about your little brother. I know he's watching over you and he's so incredibly proud of you. Never stop doing makeup and being you ❤️
Alexisjayda sounds like her little brother is giving them all sorts of signs that he is resting easy now and that he is watching over them all. It was very emotional. My heart aches for she and her family.
*thank you for always being there for me.. I love you!* ❤️
NikkieTutorials WE LOVE YOU TOO!!
NikkieTutorials we love you so much nikkie. may your brother rest in peace x
NikkieTutorials I love your channel sweetie lots of love for you and your brother
Always here for you
nikki, my god you are amazing
I hope you one day make a palette with a red eyeshadow called Mikai.
yes
It would be so epic if Jeffree and Niki collabed on a palette
Yessss
Omg yes
How about a whole palette of reds called Mikai?
Stay strong Nikkie
the balloon story, PHEW. I'm not crying, you're crying 😭😭omg
God bless you ❤
Jackie Aina yasss queen supporting other makeup artists like a true queen. Also that highlight in your profile pick is stunning
Jackie Aina Jackie Jackie Jackie Jackie Jackie Jackie Jackie Jackie
Queens supporting queens
The 1.4k dislikes are people who were crying so hard *their* teardrops hit the button by accident.
@@r3n_ Her brother would be proud that she was making money.
*their
Hahaha, its true!
GamenMetNiels It appears as some narcissist also liked this comment...(pardon if I misspelled narcissist)
@@r3n_ but theres no ads
when you said "vriendje" it really hit me hard. I'm dutch too and hearing it in our language made it so real and emotional to me. My heart literally sank.
lindseyjorissen what does it mean ...., it sounds so sweet
Katie Hogg it means little friend
Channa Wilmink my heart ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Timestamp?
Justin Y 2.0 14:10
12:26. "I think the hardest thing for both me and my family is that we dont really have the feeling that he's gone yet...
...but to us, it pretty much still feels like he's on holiday with friends. And he can come home any second now. Like we're all just looking at the door like okay any-any second now, come back now. We miss you. "
Man, i cried.
same, asf
I was the exact same when my best friend passed away in 2014
Crying
Crisselle Heart ❤️
I’m litteraly crying after earing that
I believe it was your brother. I'd be thinking the same way, it's comforting for the grieving process. I'm so sorry for you and your family's loss. You take all the time you need girl, we love you.
im here after your coming out video... Mikai is smiling in heaven today, he's soooo proud of his sister! ❤❤❤
krasnalkowa oh my goodness, your comment made me cry, that’s beautiful❤️
also LOVE you supporting your friends' brands and collabs! a true queen
Gabbie Hanna // ❤️
Gabbie Hanna gabbiee❤❤
That was really nice for you to say!
Gabbie Hanna girl i love you.
I love seeing youtubers supporting each other
We love you Nikkie!
Benefit Cosmetics hi benefit! Love your products!! I haven't tried your brow products yet but I REALLY want to!!
I like her
we love a supportive brand
Hi benefit
I never thought I would actually cry because of a Nikkie Tutorials video. Nikkie, you’re so strong and we as your UA-cam family will always love and support you. I’m sure I speak for a lot of us when I say I’m glad you took a couple weeks off. Healing is important. We all love you Nikkie, and we’ll all support you however we can, as well as wearing as much red as we can.
Carmela M I couldn't have said it better!
The first time I watched this video, my heart broke for you and your family. Now, my heart breaks with you, as I lost my little brother recently, too. He had just turned 18 and was so happy and healthy... But he went to bed one night and he never woke up again.
Allow me to say how sorry I am that you had to go through that kind of tragedy, and that I completely understand the pain and devastation that comes with losing a young sibling. It has been a few weeks now and I still expect him to come walking down the hall, or I'll tiptoe around the house late at night so I don't wake him. Remembering he's gone is always like a slap in the face from reality. But what has kept me going and been a comfort to me is knowing that everything I accomplish in life will be to honor him and his love of life.
I am sure Mikai is so, so proud of you Nikkie! ❤️
@Prison Mike Thank you ❤️
I feel like when losing a relative that you spent so much time with, it leaves a hole somewhere... And it's just sad
Sorry for your loss
@@cristianb9557 It definitely does. Losing a relative you're close to (especially a younger sibling) is like losing a part of yourself. It's losing a whole future that intertwined with your own. Thank you for your sentiments ❤️
I’m so sorry for ur loss I lost my mum last year I get it ur not alone 😔😭😀
Preena Patel thank you
Omg! I wore a denim shirt and red skirt today with a monochromatic red makeup. Your little brother is definitely up to something leaving signs all over the world. What a beautiful tribute to him with this video!
Dealing with the Wheelers crazy im wearing a red shirt today and came across this video..
vanessa rodriguez i was wearing a red shirt and red makeup, too haha ;*)
It was my cousins wedding today and the colors were red and white
I wore red shoes today even tho i didnt like them that much... we love u little dude
i did my pedi and have red on my toes
It’s December 7 2018. Today I found out my math teacher committed suicide. I went home and did my makeup four times in his favorite colors. Makeup is truly a therapy.
Izabella Millard awww
I hope it helped you and I wish you a very lucky and blessed life. Makeup helps so much in so many situations. Stay strong.
I’m so sorry.
My teacher also passed away.., she was the best, she was like a friend , like a second mom to me.. 😔
I bet if he was still here that would mean the world t him, bless your heart
Definitely your little brother letting you know that he is with you. He is just somewhere different now... somewhere we can't understand or comprehend. His body may be gone, but HE can never die. He's just taking another journey now, the same journey we will all eventually take. So, let us cherish our time here and look forward to our time there, with the ones who have gone before us...
Who's here after she made the palette with RED EYESHADOW called MIKAI😭❤️
When??
@@lilahend check her latest video where she reveals the palette
Nikkie Tutorials × Beauty Bay
Me
@@hrishitabhattacharya9067 ty
yup it is in collaboration with beauty bay :)
My father died in May 2004 and about 4 years later we adopted our first cat Teddy who was, as we later found out, born on the exact day my dad died and was also 4 years old when we got him. I always think that my father kind of send him to us to keep us company and be by our side.
DieAlteistwiederda aww❤️
DieAlteistwiederda 💕
I literally just shed a tear..... No joke 😢
This story touched my heart 💞
DieAlteistwiederda ❤️✨
*Rest in paradise little angel*
Battling cancer myself for the third time... been doing it now for two years too...
So sorry for your loss your brother was a fighter ❤️
You can and will win this♡
Im sorry for what you are going through.
Grace Fischer Girl you can beat this I believe in you. You’re a beautiful fighting soul and have the power to kick ass and win.
Best of luck, stay strong!!
Grace Fischer Just stay strong and keep believing, my heart is with you
I am here after reading that today was his 16th. Your brother would be so proud of where you are now. Also he would be so proud that you came out even without will. Love you Nikkie
Such a beautiful video Nikkie! Thank you for sharing and touching my soul ✨❤️
What a great friend
Natalies Outlet I love you and your content and rest in peace Micah 😢
Natalie I love how when I look at the comments of a UA-camr’s video you are always saying kind words of positivity. I have noticed this on not just a few UA-camr’s videos but more then a dozen.
The balloon story is so precious 🎈❤️
Ali M I know right I’m painting my nails red for that
When my Nana passed away, I was at summer camp. The night she went, I had an incredibly vivid dream about her hugging me and saying "I love you, mija." I woke up feeling more rested and calm than I had all week. I found out at breakfast that she had passed in the night, and I genuinely think she came to say goodbye before moving on.
MommyNeedsMoscato 1
Sending all my LOVE
I had the exact SAME dreams about my Aunt and my Grandad when they both passed away, it's so surreal !! but its some-what comforting at the same time..
I cried... I'm so sorry I got cancer as well...
Thank you for doing this Nikkie. Greetings from Spain 💜💜💜
muchísimo ánimo, espero que te vaya todo bien, un gran abrazo para ti y toda tu familia
Como estas? Como suige yo cáncer?
I’m so sorry i hope you Heal. God bless you 💗
Mucha fuerza! Tú puedes 💓
How are you now?I hope that you will/have win/won the battle
I can't imagine what you're going through, but I pray you find peace.i can't stop crying
Ik your brother is so proud of you rn☺️❤️
unicorn He truly is
Nikkie I cried this whole video. I just love you, your brother is with you love
Kayla Carmack same 💝
Kayla Carmack omg ikr
I understand, my grandpa passed away a few months ago, and it still hasn’t set in. I feel like I can still just go up to his house, knock on the door, and he will open the door with open arms, and hug me. But thinking that I can’t see him ever again, just breaks my heart and I haven’t come to accept his passing. Hang in there, we can go through this together. ❤️
Woot Woot i lost my granny 4 years ago and I just wanted to say that you are never alone and there will always be people to talk to, it does get better but it takes time. You are in my prayers and I’m really sorry for your loss ❤️
Same. My grandpa passed away 4 months ago and I still hope I will hear his voice calling me to eat or just hear his laugh. Hard to accept but we can make it through. 💓
hope you’re ok. And if not, i hope you feel better soon. I know Words aren’t enough but i truly hope so. Loss is the biggest pain one can feel in his or her life. And keep on going, i’m sure he would be proud of how far you’ll come in live. May he rest in piece💓
Ik how you feel, my grandpa passed away when I was 6 I’m 11 now and still haven’t gotten over it I keep gold coins because he used to call me his golden coins I miss him a lot and I hate myself for not telling him how much I loved him😔
She’s happy she got 10 million subscribers!! That’s what her brother means to her! His death is a symbol of her fame and fortune. Sad
I’m seriously not okay from this. I held my son so tight. I’m so sorry that this happened. It’s okay to cry, it’s okay to be emotional Nikkie we all understand don’t apologize, its okay to cry on camera, we’re all with you
I can truly understand that "It hasn't hit us yet feeling". My childhood (and adulthood) best friend past this past December. And while it's already been 6 months, there are STILL times where I don't really quite feel it, feel it. I keep thinking "Oh, he's just out of town." "He'll come back from Philly soon." "Can't wait til he's back in town." kinda feelings. Only when I scroll past his name unexpectedly in my phone or on social media, etc, does it sock me with the reality, but in my mind, I just keep thinking he's just out of touch, not...gone. I truly feel for you and my heart is heavy with you.
Kaalyn - OPG I’m sorry for your loss! one of my best friends passed away 4 years ago in an accident and sadly, that feeling has never gone away! 😔
Kaalyn - OPG my friend past away over a year and a half ago and it still feels like she's on holiday and will come back any day now
Mmph, I'm really feeling for you both, Jamee and Tui. It's such a surreal feeling. I've lost a lot of friends in my relatively short life, but some just are so meaningful your brain just can't truly accept they're gone. I'm sending you all my whole heart.
I feel the same way about my sister in Texas who passed I live in CO and keep thinking of she's ok she's just in Texas doing her own thing
The world is crying for you Nikki. So deeply sorry for your loss and our prayers are with your family.
When she said "This is for you, I love you, I miss you." I cried, and I've legit only been watching her for about a week.
Got goosebumps when she was talking about the stuff that happened when he passed away, and the balloons. I totally believe in that stuff. Love you Nikkie.
Me too, I really think those things were God showing them that her brother was safe. I've had many experiences like that myself when family members have passed
Payton B me too. It’s awesome. It gives kind of a feeling relief. It happened to me, when we were driving past the death site of my friend. A song came on that we sang together in karaoke and then after that song it was a song about angels.
me too and the recap also!
He is with you always, watching from above and protecting you ❤️
Coco Lili I love your channel!
I am so very sorry for your loss Nikki. You had me crying 10 seconds into this video. It really hit home. I lost my brother a few years ago because of a drunk driver. The pain of them being gone never goes away. Whoever said time heals lied! They lied lied lied!!! I'm still waiting for him to walk through the door. Just know that he is always with you. These brothers of our protected us while they were here and will continue to every day of our lives. Love you so much beautiful. Keeping you and your little brother in my thoughts and prayers ❤
I know what loosing someone you love is like. Hang in there you and Nikkie. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thank you Samantha Diaz you also darlin 💙
when your voice cracked, I automatically cried, stay strong ♡
I cried the whole time
I kept watching you and I could only think about your brother
I totally think those were all signs and I’ll be praying for you and your family
Damn, at the end of this video when you almost cried I wanted to cry too. I’m so sorry for your lost. I know exactly how it feels to lost someone you loved. I hope you’ll feel better. Stay strong Nikkie, I love you ❤️
I think instead of saying “ loved “ it should be “ love “ because although he passed away, she will ALWAYS love him.
Hi pretty! I just want to say that I understand you, my father died of cancer many years ago ... And I say with all my heart that your brother did not lose the fight against the disease, he won because he had the courage to fight. A person who chooses to live is a winner but God has plans for us all. Your brother will always be a warrior just like my father. He smiles at you from paradise.
She finally made it! She has a shade in her new palette called Mikai and the shade is red 🥺💗✨
my grandpa had cancer and had ended up in a coma for a couple of days. one night, i had called my mom and told her to put the phone on speaker and set it by him. i was talking to him about my day and telling him he needed to get better. before i hung up, i told him i loved him and he responded with “i love you too, macy”. he hadn’t spoken for days, but he answered me. the next morning, he passed away. he was definitely my best friend and i was blessed to be the last person he talked to. times like these are rough, but they will get easier with time. everything is in god’s hands and he never does anything without having a reason behind it!
macy fletcher
That is so sad and so beautiful at the same time. And true that, God can always make beauty out of dust 💖💖💖
macy fletcher may God bless your dear grandpa 💙🤲🏼 To you my dear you are absolutely right God Always have a reason for everything that happens in our lives we must never lose faith & trust in God. 💙💕 May God comfort you & all those who have loss someone ♥️
I'm so sorry for your loss.🙏❤
macy fletcher after all the things ive been trough. God doesnt exist
I'm so sorry Nikkie. I also use makeup and various arts for therapy and its very helpful. I wish you the best healing process and I wish your brother a peaceful rest. We're always gonna be here for you and we love you! 💞💞
Elaine Wireman poder ser inscrever no canal
I’m so sorry Nikkie. I hope you feel no pressure to make videos, take your time to heal and spend time with your loved ones ❤️
Honestly, I’ve always not really liked my younger brother, but after watching this I realize how special the time is that we have.
Ive never cried at a makeup tutorial before! Nikkie you're amazing & so strong! so much love to you and your family
We are all here for you! Love you Nikkie he’s so proud of you and looking over you
Ishan Ali oh look who it is
Ishan Ali gosh u r everywhere
Ang13libertatum A lol he is
*i cried so much watching this video, u and your brother r so brave!*
Bawling right now. Like.... bawling.
okay i got chills at 2:38. i believe that was your brothers way of telling you he's okay and to pursue your dream... i know this video is old but i never got around to watching it until now. what a blessing
I am truly sorry for your loss. I can't imagine the heartache that you have endured and still are enduring. Your baby brother's memory will live forever through you and yes, I absolutely believe that he had a hand in the timing of the balloons and you hitting 10 million subs! Congratulations! 🎊
You're such a strong person.. And so was he. Stay strong, we are all here for you. ❤
707 OMG DEFENDER OF JUSTICE 707 !!! ☆★☆ !!
I'm crying so hard right now. I love you.
Brandon Belue same.
Brandon Belue me too😢😢😭😭😭😭
Ana Salvo I couldn't imagine losing my little brother. I'm about to do a red look for him. For her.
Lisa Wachtmann I'm about to do a red look for her and him. This is a good look fod nicki and her complexion too. ♥️♥️
Anyone know how old he was?
Tip: don’t watch and do the makeup tutorial at the same time. I have snot,tears, and Foundation running. My heart goes out to you and your family! ❤️
I can't stop crying. So sorry dear
I’m so sorry for your loss, he is watching over you and congratulations on 10M subscribers you deserve it!! 🌺
So much love to you and your family ❤️ praying for peace for you all
We Love You, Dear Nikkie. Your Beloved Brother Is In Heaven, playing with my Beloved Son, whose favorite color is also red. This week, I will wear red to honor them both. God Bless You and Peace, Love and Comfort to You and Your Family Always.
Bless you, i hope youre doing ok. I know this is old but your comment made me cry xx
You are so amazing Nikkie! Congrats for your 10 millions, and I So sorry for your brother! ♥️
❤maravilhoso
this was so beautiful i'm tearing up
you're such a strong soul to be able to look to the positive side and continue being happy despite of the loss you experienced.. i truly admire you
It‘s okay to cry nikkie ❤️ I am sorry for your loss.
Mirella Derungs it’s so sad😞
Yea... I cried hard when my Grandma died.... I wouldnt be able to deal with my little brothers or my big sister dying
It sure was your brother! He will continue to let know he's around you just listen. It's so comforting when you feel the departed with you. I'm so sorry for your loss. And congratulations on 10m! Love you !
Why can I see the pain in your eyes :(
I aspire to be as strong as you if I ever loose someone, which is my biggest fear.
May his soul rest in peace.
I'm so sorry for your loss Nikki, you are incredibly strong and I can't even imagine your pain right now. Love you loads x
Linda C do you know how old Nikkies brother is? (I don’t know how to spell his name)
I’m not crying.. okay I’m crying. This video gave me all the feels
Watching this after your coming out video and you are SOO SOOO strong. I am so very sorry...
My condolences to you and your family Nikkie. May he Rest In Peace❤️
What Nikkie said about the dog is soo true. Because dogs can see and feel when the soul leaves the body. And her mom’s dog knew that her little brother is dying thats why he went crazy
When our physical body dies we still have another body that looks exactly the same as our physical body it is called the astral body. It is also know as the prana body or life force body (energy body). When someone dies young his energy body is still very lively and energetic, for those people who can see astral bodies they call it a ghost. Dogs can see ghost, sometimes they start to bark when they see a ghost. Actually we are all ghosts trapped in a physical body, but we don't call it ghost we call it soul or spirit. A human being has a body and a soul. When we die the souls leaves the body and goes to some other place. After some resting period he will be reborn in a new body. 🙏💖
Timestamp?
@@Ana-sc6dp 9:53 :)
It's crazy the day before my grandfather passed our dog sat beside him the whole time and cried and just stayed there. I miss him♥️
@@starlight27277 this is buddhism
Crap now I’m crying
oh god, same...
Alyssa Lopez me too
Same tho
Same 😢
Same
That 10 mil moment was definitely him...I'm so sorry for your loss... All the spiritual things made me cry 😢💕 especially the dog one...
Nikkie your family is in my prayers. I cried so much through this. As a cancer survivor who has lost close friends from it I know how hard it is. It does feel like they’ll come home. My friends deaths don’t feel real at all.
I am sorry for your loss.♡
Today is actually the "first anniversary" of my uncle's death, after he fought cancer for 4 years. I still think about him every single day, but it gets easier..
Band Nerd best wishes for your family 💛
Help me develop the channel. You can go and watch my videos💞🐱
And sorry for spamming💞🖤
Viktoria Myhero what's that to do with anything?
Viktoria Myhero you’re spamming on the worst possible video. go somewhere else
Viktoria Myhero girl, really? Is isn’t the place to promote your channel🙄
My dad passed in January. It doesn’t hit you at first that they’re gone, it’s like you’re still expecting them to walk in the room. It’s almost harder when it sinks in they aren’t coming back. Definitely one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to go through! Love and light to you NIKKIE!!♥️💕♥️
It’s so hard. I lost my grandfather who raised me last year.
Some of my family member said he wasn’t great but for me, he is amazing.
I’m always grateful for him raising me and loving me so much.
I definitely believe in the “little signs” as I’m watching this I wanna cry and I’m so proud of u for staying strong. At the end u say “let’s wear something red” and out of all the days I’m wearing a red shirt ❤️.. may he Rest In Peace and the Lord comfort you and your family in this time. Xoxo
he will always be with you in your heart. i know he’s smiling down at you right now and he’s so super proud of you. stay strong, girl 💄❤️
kamryn claire this should be pinned
Oh Nikkie, my heart breaks for you. Praying for you! What a special way to honor your little brother!
I've gotten here far to late, and I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm glad he's out of pain and not suffering, though. I'm sure he fought incredibly hard. While I'm not sure what I believe, I do know my grandma has been with me since she passed. Ever since, no matter where I go, there are constantly birds (something she watched out the windows a lot after a leg amputation) sitting outside my windows. When I have complete break downs, and I sit outside, typically a blue jay will sit near me and squawk insistently. The little shits will sit there until I laugh about it, and then take off. I kind of believe it's my grandmother watching over me, letting me know I am still okay, even when things look grey.
I'm so very sorry about your loss. It's okay to cry we love you ❤
I think.. that we’re all allowed to think and believe what we want to believe, and we’re all allowed to grieve in whatever way we want to, in whatever way we can.
❤️
Although I know your channel I don't really watch your videos but I came across to this video and just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your lost. So many of us lost someone precious to us and we know how you feel.
Stay strong!
I tried not to cry, because I have also lost someone special to cancer. It was about 2 weeks ago when i lost my mom.
Just know that your brother will always be there for you. And we, your subscribers, will be also.
Sending love ❤️
When my father moved on from this life after a battle with cancer, the moment he left us in the middle of the night, my mom was suddenly woken from a deep sleep and knew he had gone. She said it was as if his spirit passed through her to say "see you later in Heaven." That was 3 years ago, and I can say, without a doubt, that I still feel like he's on a trip to the store and I'm waiting for him to come back. I honestly don't think the feeling of them being gone ever fully sinks in, as emotionally, I'm still somehow waiting to see him come home. It doesn't get easier, it just gets different. Praying for peace for you and your family.
Spankie Valentine TV I'm so sorry you've lost a parent to! It's the hardest thing I've ever gone threw losing my Mom. She passed away of a sudden heart attack in her sleep totally unexpected and two days before she passed I had a dream I lost both parents and woke up balling my eyes out, the day my Mom passed replays in my mind like a movie and makes me sick the second I think about it. It's terrfying but I totally understand what you mean about feeling like there gone away on a trip about to come back anytime.
I can feel her watching over me there was some really weird things that happened to me and my finace right after she passed that I knew in my heart was her.
I pray you and you're family are doing ok after such a tragic thing!
Im sorry that you lost your mom...I cant even imagine.
I'm sorry
Spankie Valentine TV so sorry for your lost I know there are no words that can console someone I know it because I lost my dad as well it was hard to believe that he isn't here anymore but I know his in another place and so is your dad.
In so sorry for your loss:(
You’re so strong Nikki. Like your brother. And i bet he is watching this video with a smile and is thanking you. May he rest in peace. And we as your community are supporting you and love you 🙏🏻❤️
Dogs are super intune with humans they love. I totally believe that our loved ones try to let us know that have moved on and are alright. Love you bunches! I will send up prayers for you and your family!
Seeing this makes me think of my 3 younger siblings, they are my life and i tried not to cry when you said that mikai was watching you from heaven, supporting you. Im sure hes feeling very well where he is right now.
I lost my brother back in 2008 to a tragic accident so I know what you’re going through, my heart and prayers is going out to you and your family ❤️ All of your subscribers admire how strong you are. Your brother will be with you for the rest of your life looking over you and being so proud of your success. I 100% believe that the situations that happened were NOT by chance, it absolutely was your brother telling you he is at peace. Such a beautiful video in his honour. We love you Nikkie. May he Rest In Peace xo
I lost my grandparents and aunt in accident many years ago. When we spread their ashes 3 birds flew right over head. It might be nothing but that moment always stuck with me. Over years we always see 3 birds at important events like weddings for the grandchildren. I think each person can believe what they need to deal and move forward, nobody can tell you whether it is true or not.
I don’t even know what to tell you about your loss. I lost my aunt to cancer last year, and although I can’t understand what you and your family must be going through, I can at least relate. One thing I know by experience is; there is nothing that can ease the pain. There is nothing that will you make you miss him less. But know that he IS happy right now, he IS in a much better place. So for his sake, life will go on. And you will do things in life, to make him proud. Congratulations on the 10 million. Love you, always.💖
Sojansetly this was such a beautiful comment, bless your soul
Ana Gonzalez I agree, well said!!
I almost lost my little brother twice and it’s terrifying thinking about what if he was gone and I’m sorry that you lost your little brother.... I can’t see loosing my brother and I love how your staying so strong talking about this.
He is with you Nikkie, he never left, remember that, he will always stay and watch over you. It's not weird it's not strange,the things you shared about your family were truly signs, people can have them in a very different way like a dream while they sleep of someone they love saying goodbye or more....it can happen very differently, so it is true and you are right to believe that it was you little brother. With the signs he gave to you it shows how strong of a soul he is and I believe he's happy and at rest now and he will always be there for you, you have to know that. Stay strong and don't forget to smile for him. God bless! Much of love!
I got chills when you said when y'all released the balloons you got 10 million
Kylie's Corner I did too, powerful moment
I did too!
Started crying
Kylie's Corner yo me too
Kylie's Corner o
one thing i learnt from this, whenever we lose someone, we should focus on their life, and not the death. of course the human breain naturally pays attention to negativity more, but we should focus on the positive eg the things we learnt from that person, the good memories, and treasure the moments well spent! and i love how positive you are here, bless you!
Can’t believe it, haven’t even meet you in real life and u made me cry, really emocional video, congratulations for everything you have reach in you life girl, u touch my heart, I’m so pround and happy for you ♥️
God bless him, you, your family, and everyone xx
Cry Nikkie. Let it all out. Im crying with you. I remember when you first told us, I can't even imagine how much you're hurting right now. My uncle has cancer and is getting treatment, luckily it isn't a cancer that will spread. We are so proud of you.
As a sister of four little brothers ... I cry. Still so so so sorry for your and your family 's loss. Hugs and kisses and all my love for you sweetheart!
Espinaca
Brynja24 ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
My mom passed a year ago, I just watched this video and related so much to you. For about 6 months after she passed my constant feeling was “she’s on vacation, she’ll be back soon”. This is how I explain loss to everyone. I was strong through the whole video until you did the tribute at the end. My heart hurts for you and it never gets easier we just get stronger! ❤️
You're so strong and resilient. I've been watching you since you were 16 and your talent and creativity is truly endless and amazing! I'm so sorry about your little brother. I know he's watching over you and he's so incredibly proud of you. Never stop doing makeup and being you ❤️
😭❤️ my heart is with you! This was so emotional to watch. Sending so much love to you.
Alexisjayda so sad😩
Alexisjayda sounds like her little brother is giving them all sorts of signs that he is resting easy now and that he is watching over them all. It was very emotional. My heart aches for she and her family.
So much love to you and your family! 💜💜💜💜💜 you are in my prayers
💜Sandrea 💜💜💜
Awe Niki I’m so sorry for your loss😔