Personally, I know this is a bit controversial, but At World’s end was bloody awesome. Yes, it was technically and objectively inferior to the two predecessors, but in my opinion it had the richest character development (Davy Jones & calypso, jack sparrow, Beckett, bootstrap...) which made it great to me. But I guess it’s tied to Dead Man’s Chest which I felt was the most immersive.
Do these people not realize that names don't require explanations? They did it once in a nice humorous way in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade which was also lampshading how the character was name. Now it seems like they think it's clever to explain something no one actually had a question about.
Dr. Doof: "Both my parents failed to show up at my birth, so I was raised by ocelots." Imperial Recruitment Officer: "Heinz Ocelot." Dr. Doof: "Actually, my last name is Doofen-" Vader (who is there, for some reason): "Sorry to interrupt, but did you say BOTH parents failed to show up?"
This movie wasn't just disappointing, it actually hurt. The writers didn't get who Jack is at all. In the first movie he played the fool and was two steps ahead of everyone else, pulling the strings to get what he needed. In this movie he went from playing the fool to being the fool. He went from sly, genius to Mr Magoo.
I read somewhere that the reason why Jack was so unlucky in Dead Men Tell No Tales was because Angelica found the voodoo doll Jack at the post credit scene of On Stranger Tides and it may have something to do with his behaviour
To be honest, when Ryan did the "On Stranger Tides" pitch I was surprised to learn they made a 4th. I don't yet know how to handle the existence of a 5th.
"He's like dead men tell no tales which is gonna be the name of the movie" "He said the name of the movie!" "He did... Except the movie is gonna be called Salazar's revenge in pretty much every other country outside the US!" "Why?" "Unclear!"
So, in these movies when you get cursed, you instantly get a guide book called "So, you are cursed now: Everything you need to know about curses, but were afraid to ask"? Gotcha.
Instead of calling this movie Dead Men Tell No Tales, i instead like to call it Dead Men Tell Bad Tales. Why? Because the movie tells such a bad tale of course
Its like hearing the same song with different lyrics but sung in the same pattern and meter. Ryan could say nothing of substance but it would be that comforting rythem.
"We're going to be making money with this right?" "I'm going to need you to get way off my back about money." Que Dead Men Tell No Tales being the lowest-performing movie article.
The story line parallels between this Pirates movie and Rise of Skywalker are uncanny!! "They have to find a thing to find another thing that leads them to another thing..."
People say _On Stranger Tides_ is worse than _Dead Men Tell No Tales._ Honestly, I prefer _On Stranger Tides_ over _Dead Men Tell No Tales._ Because DMTNT feels like it had a decent idea for a plot, but just picked the lamest and safest ways to go about it. For example, Will's whole thing about being captain of the Flying Dutchman is he's essentially Charon- the ferry man of the Underworld. His job is to make sure dead souls stay dead. So, with the undead Salazar running amok, shouldn't Will be aiding Jack and Henry? As aiding them in confronting Salazar would be in line with his duty while also giving us scenes between him and his son?
I legit hate Carina as a character, she's too forced and in your face, 90% of her lines are like "YES IM A POWERFUL AND INDIPENDENT WOMAN" and for some reason suddenty everyone in the movies is like "Eww woman cant be a pirate" like Elizabeth didnt exist in the previous movies
I really like Stranger Tides. It's kinda like those short story books where the hero goes on a new adventure each chapter. I like the first 3 movies but it got really long and the plot became real complex to understand the entire story in one sitting. I think the POTC series would be more fun if everything wasnt so tightly connected and they could play around with crazy concepts like in ST, and it's all just another chapter of the adventures of Captain Jack Sparrow
There is a great moment when Koreena asks Barbosa what she is to him. He says, "Treasure". Geoffrey Rush is such a great character he makes the scene special.
Screenwriter guy: "And then she says her name is Rey Skywalker!" Producer guy: "What¿?” Screenwriter guy: "Oh sorry I mean and then she says her name is Carina Barbossa!"
„So wait, if Poseidon exists in this film, this changes the whole premise of gods we established in the third movie” “I need you to get aaaall of my back about mythology”
Well in the first movie they established that the Aztec gods exist and have powers but they never showed up again, maybe the same will happen with Poseidon
@@ExtremeMadnessX Loki is explicitly a shapeshifter de to the whole "trickster god" thing. Calypso is some sort of Sea Goddess, no guarantee she can shapeshift unless she incarnates or something.
“Maybe when you get cursed it comes with an instruction manual.” Ya know…he’s got a point there regarding like ANY mainstream movie that involves a curse honestly.
"So the main villain is not allowed to stand on land" "Didn't we already do the same thing with Davy Jones?" "Oh, I forgot about him! Whoops!" "Whoopsie!" "So anyways let me tell you about the end credits scene starring Davy Jones"
It could be argued or retconned that the magic that caused that was based on a curse, or that the entire "living while his heart is in a box" thing was a curse in and of itself so when the trident was broken and all curses were lifted, Will's heart magically left the box and went back into his chest so he could live normally.
‘And then we’re gonna see how jack got his outfit, like his hair bead, hat, compass.’ ‘Doesn’t it kinda ruin some of the mystery regarding Jack Sparrow that he gained all his recognizable accessories in the aftermath of one particular adventure? And wait, didn’t Tia Dalma say he got the compass from her?’ ‘Look sir, I need you to get all the way off my back about that.’
Too bad there’s no way to go back and look at the history of the franchise to make sure the storytelling and myths and legends all line up and make sense.
I was curious about that. I read on the website that Jack went to Tia Dalma to get the compass for Captain Morgan. Then, when Morgan died, he gave it back to Jack.
Look, if you explain something with an event in the past doesn't fully make sense, you can then make an origin movie for that again. Like, where did those people get these items and why did they think Jack would like them? It's the Curella way of just making origin-stories after origin-stories until the dawn of time. Maybe dawn of time had some nice hear-beads?
"So it must be difficult to break the trident of Poseidon - God of the Sea" "Actually it's gonna be super easy, barely an inconvenience" Ah yes, there it is
‘So how does Barbossa learn she is his daughter?’ ‘Well, sir, he gave her the journal with the jewel and Jack reminds him of this girl Barbossa used to know.’ ‘Knew when? If Jack knew her too doesn’t that imply Barbossa dated her when Barbossa were still Jack’s first mate?’ ‘Yeah, I guess that would be when that took place.’ ‘But isn’t Henry and Corina supposed to be about the same age? Jack wasn’t Captain on the Black Pearl for over 8 years before the first movie and Henry isn’t conceived until the end of the third.’ ‘Look sir, I need you to get all the way off my back about that.’ ‘Okay then, let me get off that thing!’
I mean, she could have been someone Jack met when they were younger. So, Barbossa had a preexisting (maybe on again, off again) relationship with her and just had the kid more recently. That wouldn't be unusual.
Didn’t even mention how the movie changes how Jack got his famous compass, in the second film it’s revealed that he bartered for it from Tia Dalma/Calypso which makes sense that she would have a magical object like that in her possession. Another weird thing about the compass is now there’s the rule that if you “betray it”, it will unleash your greatest fear. 1) Jack’s greatest fear was always the Kraken but I suppose once it was dead his fears shifted 2) Why would his greatest fear be a cursed crew he doesn’t know about and thinks is dead? 3) if his greatest fear is Salazar then why does he never really seem to take the threat that seriously 4) is his greatest fear supposed to be the end of piracy and Salazar is simply a symbol of that fear thus the compass decides to release him 5) Also I guess the rule of the compass is so strong it can override other curses?! There’s a lot more I want to ask but I’ll leave it at that
Jack never takes anything seriously because he's kind of drunk pretty much all the time so that answers question 3. I have no idea about all the other stuff you mentioned though.
@@RialVestro there’s plenty of moments in the first three films where Jack takes things seriously like confrontations with a villain or when he gets backstabbed or when a friend gets hurt, it’s happened on multiple occasions.
@@DovahkiinMaster172 I can't think of a single moment where Jack has ever been concerned about anything at all. He was never angry, never sad, never scared. Even when he's about to be hanged, or when he got stabbed, and I mean he basically dove head first into the Kraken. Actually, now that I think about, the only time he's mildly upset is when Elizabeth destroyed all the rum on the island. Which makes sense.
“I’m just not sure we have to do that whole Carina is a Barbossa thing…” “Well sir ever since Vader was Lukes father all movies have to at least try and make a father reference - research shows most of the paying audience have fathers.”
@@johnsnow2199 so ,and how many characters the MCU can adapt ,that exists in the comics ,since its their source material ?They’ve barely scratched the surface LOL !😂😂
Making pitch meetings for all the pirates of the Caribbean movies is tight. [P.s: Usually by the 5th time spaces tend to get loose (wink wink) but making pitch meetings are always tight.]
Fun fact, in Japan, this movie is called "Pirates of Caribbean: 最後の海賊" which translates to Pirates of the Caribbean: The Last Pirate. Clearly the same people responsible for Star Wars: Disney Disaster had something to do with these movies. Lol
And the F&F... We need a crossover! Either Dom and crew /fam goes so fast they travel back in time, or Jack gets some spell to go forward magically, neither will surprise.
6:18 "And so what happens with the souls of the dead now, wasn't it kinda Will's job to bring them in the afterlife?" "Yeah they're dead anyway so it feel like it doesn't matter" That's so accurate i can really see disney script writers go like this XD
"Does everybody have to be related all the time?" "Yeah, 'cuz that automatically makes it good story telling." Not even kidding, I just got back from a family reunion. We sang songs and told stories there. We already set up a sequel for 2023.
This movie was so boring and nonsensical, the only thing I remember is how demotivated poor Johnny Depp was to play the shell of a great character he created 12 years ago.
"How does everybody know these very specific curse rules?" "I don't know, maybe when you get cursed it comes with an instruction manual." "That makes sense!" Sheer genius 😂
Yeah and that's actually a good point. I could buy them knowing in the first movie because they apparently heard of the curse *before* stealing that treasure so it's safe to assume the rules for it were written somewhere, but it IS a bit weird that Salazar would know when his curse didn't have any background.
I haven’t seen the pitch meetings for the other four films. I just came here to watch him bash on this movie, because it deserves to be bashed. Hard. You’re right though. This video is more fun to watch than the actual movie
What this movie also forgot is that Davy Jones became the way he was because he wasn't doing his job. Will was ferrying the dead, so there's no reason why he should've turned into a sea creature.
producer guy: what about captain salazer's ship ? screenwriter guy: well just recycle the flying dutchman and cover its deck with lanterns. it will be super easy, barely an inconvenience
Thank you for being so satirically constructive with Pirates of the Caribbean and for avoiding giving my man Johnny Depp a harder time than he already has.
"Wasn't his appearance part of his curse? That shouldn't still be on his head." "Yeahhh....I don't care!!!" _dying_ I mean this is increasingly all movies and TV. I mean what are the audiences going to do? Just...GASP!...not watch or something??
Not watch so this garbage doesn't make any money so they start taking seriously. Be the change you want to see or whatever that saying is supposed to be.
I seem to have forgotten most of this movie. I did like the charred + watery hair of the cursed crew though upon rewatching some scenes. Special effects are tight!
Pitch Meeting Requests: Godzilla (1998) Jumanji (1995) Jumanji The Next Level The Conjuring Annabelle Night At The Museum Umbrella Academy Camp Cretaceous Scream Pixels Pitch Perfect
@@goldfire1 Jack does nothing in this movie. He just bumps around. The new writers clearly didn't understand the character and they just turned him into a joke.
“Maybe when you’re cursed it comes with an instruction manual” Careful now! Last time a lucrative franchise came with mention of a manual, we got _Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them!_
Which PotC movie is your favorite? Let us know!
Probably this one
Either of the first two
none of them
Your mom
Personally, I know this is a bit controversial, but At World’s end was bloody awesome. Yes, it was technically and objectively inferior to the two predecessors, but in my opinion it had the richest character development (Davy Jones & calypso, jack sparrow, Beckett, bootstrap...) which made it great to me. But I guess it’s tied to Dead Man’s Chest which I felt was the most immersive.
Jack: "I don't have a people, I was raised by birds."
Imperial Recruitment Officer: "Jack...Sparrow."
At least he wasn't raised by swallows.
Do these people not realize that names don't require explanations? They did it once in a nice humorous way in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade which was also lampshading how the character was name. Now it seems like they think it's clever to explain something no one actually had a question about.
Sincerely hope this comment gets to the thousands
Dr. Doof: "Both my parents failed to show up at my birth, so I was raised by ocelots."
Imperial Recruitment Officer: "Heinz Ocelot."
Dr. Doof: "Actually, my last name is Doofen-"
Vader (who is there, for some reason): "Sorry to interrupt, but did you say BOTH parents failed to show up?"
@@nirast2561 I knew this Comment would be here somewhere. 😄
You never get a dud from a Pitch Meeting. Ryan and Ryan are so consistent.
Consistancy is tight!
We just gonna ignore the other Ryans?
They have great chemistry together.
Idk man, I think Ryan is really carrying Ryan on his back...and he needs to get all the way off that thing
Clearly that Ryan George, and George Ryan.
"Who are you?"
"Carina."
"Carina who?"
"Carina Skywalker."
"Boy, that doesn't make any sense." "Whoops" "Whoopsy."
Star Wars memes are tight
"What are we, some kinda Pirates of the Caribbean?"
LOL
WE ARE HERE TO KILL CHAOS!
"Probably magic again, it doesn't really matter." - lazy fantasy writers in a nutshell
Literally, "A Wizzard did it!"
@@GirlWhoCriedAardvark "Who dares summon the wiza...owe it's you guys. What do you want Disney?"
YEAH! I don't care.
Yes, but what kind of magic?
Where did it come from, who did it, what did it
@@Flame-rp6yq I'm gonna need you to get aaallllll the way off my back about the logistics of magic.
This movie wasn't just disappointing, it actually hurt.
The writers didn't get who Jack is at all. In the first movie he played the fool and was two steps ahead of everyone else, pulling the strings to get what he needed. In this movie he went from playing the fool to being the fool. He went from sly, genius to Mr Magoo.
the thing hate about dead men is jack cause he's my fave and they butchered his character
I actually liked it .But it isn't as good as the other movies
Dudes an aging pirate. It only makes sense that rum and syphilis would take some kind of toll
I read somewhere that the reason why Jack was so unlucky in Dead Men Tell No Tales was because Angelica found the voodoo doll Jack at the post credit scene of On Stranger Tides and it may have something to do with his behaviour
@@Aqua-js1mp That sounds like Hollywood cope.
"I don't think you need to earn moments like that..."
Hollywood gold.
Yup, Holywood Writing 101
Hollywood gold. Currently trading at cents on the kilogram!
It's very meta that i felt like he'd already done this one.
Yes! I had to double check the upload time!
@@ManwithaCat 😂
To be honest, when Ryan did the "On Stranger Tides" pitch I was surprised to learn they made a 4th. I don't yet know how to handle the existence of a 5th.
@Man with a Cat SHOUTOUT TO THE LEGEND
@@notme222 how many are there? movies of pirates? I think I only saw 2 of them
“When should we stop making more PotC movies?”
Disney: No.
*but not with Johnny Depp anymore
People of Color movies?
Animated series inbound......probably not as interesting as pirates of dark water
@@kylemacdougall8355 Pirates of the Caribbean... you know, the movie this episode is about
Waiting for the Pirates/Pixar/Star Wars/MCU/Muppets crossover.
The coming-up-with-it-on-the-spot piece of acting was just priceless!
"I like the way you money."
My brain: "We're gonna remember this for hours now I decided."
I honestly didn't even remember the plot to this movie; saw it once and that was enough. No real interest in seeing any more...
LOL
To your brain: I like the way ya torment (lol sorry)
"How the heck did he get those hair beads?!"
That was on everyone's mind since the first movie. And now my life's complete.
I know! Because beads are just so hard to come by!
Next movie will be about the origin of the beads.
@@PhilBagels actually getting hair beads is super easy and barely an inconvenience.
"hair beads"
I like your Emutep profile pic
"He's like dead men tell no tales which is gonna be the name of the movie"
"He said the name of the movie!"
"He did... Except the movie is gonna be called Salazar's revenge in pretty much every other country outside the US!"
"Why?"
"Unclear!"
Because Javier Bardem is an international treasure even though he is an awful actor.
@@SophiaAphrodite You got me in the first half...
@@SophiaAphrodite awful?
@@SophiaAphrodite Oh, man, have the contrarian Olympics started already?
Because "dead men tell no tales" is an English saying that sounds weird in all other languages
"You seem really pleased with this, i guess it will be in the movie". The best line. The best way to give a passive aggressive insult.
So, in these movies when you get cursed, you instantly get a guide book called "So, you are cursed now: Everything you need to know about curses, but were afraid to ask"? Gotcha.
Also available as a whimsically animated cartoon.
that is how it works in minecraft mods so....
It's like Devil Fruits!
This happened on old Beetlejuice movie, they received a Dead Instruction Handbook
“maybe whan you’re cursed it comes with an instruction manual”
Coming to bookstores near you: How to uncurse yourself for dummies
0:12 "Oh I like the way you money"
Lol I love it already
Money is TIGHT! 😁
@@carter_lovejoy Oh are you having MoNeY problems?
@@arcticwulf5796 yeah yeah yeah!
Dead men telling tales about dead men not telling tales is TIGHT
Dead franchise telling tales about dead men not telling tales*
In fact it's super easy, barely an inconvenience 😉
Instead of calling this movie Dead Men Tell No Tales, i instead like to call it Dead Men Tell Bad Tales. Why? Because the movie tells such a bad tale of course
I think this is the first time we see the screen writer guy bullshitting his way through a pitch meeting after staying up all night.
Yeah and the papers he is holding are completely blank.
Ryan’s delivery on every line is perfection. How he get those frickin hair beads” was beautiful
Its like hearing the same song with different lyrics but sung in the same pattern and meter. Ryan could say nothing of substance but it would be that comforting rythem.
He is very talented
He gave a better performance than the majority of the actors in this movie😂
"Another horribly written pirates movie? But what about the fans?"
"But what about money?"
"Oh money is tight!"
"We're going to be making money with this right?"
"I'm going to need you to get way off my back about money."
Que Dead Men Tell No Tales being the lowest-performing movie article.
4 isn't the best, but 5 is definitely a step down from 4.
U do know this one was better than the 4th right? WAYY better.
@@coreymckee4844 Not at all. 5 is a giant mess of plot holes and continuity errors.
@@justinblakeney3466 that's what I said and I hated the misogynistic elements being force fed to you in this one as well.
“Motivated offspring is TIGHT”
Wow wow wow wow
Yeah yeah yeah!
I pressed the space bar and went to the comments to see if anyone noticed that.
Ryan 2021
Vergil would agree
Too bad his son is a dead weight
You captioning the video, or ... ?
Hearing, “So you have a movie for me?” Will never get old
No sir it won't
"See, Jack was traveling on the ship alone so they gave him the name 'Jack Solo!'"
That's the name of the movie!
"His name is Jack, and he's a little off so...."
The story line parallels between this Pirates movie and Rise of Skywalker are uncanny!! "They have to find a thing to find another thing that leads them to another thing..."
Well to this movie’s credit, Karina at least accepts her name is Barbossa, unlike Rey who just dons the name Skywalker.
People say _On Stranger Tides_ is worse than _Dead Men Tell No Tales._
Honestly, I prefer _On Stranger Tides_ over _Dead Men Tell No Tales._ Because DMTNT feels like it had a decent idea for a plot, but just picked the lamest and safest ways to go about it. For example, Will's whole thing about being captain of the Flying Dutchman is he's essentially Charon- the ferry man of the Underworld. His job is to make sure dead souls stay dead. So, with the undead Salazar running amok, shouldn't Will be aiding Jack and Henry? As aiding them in confronting Salazar would be in line with his duty while also giving us scenes between him and his son?
Yeah but Orlando Bloom is expensive
I legit hate Carina as a character, she's too forced and in your face, 90% of her lines are like "YES IM A POWERFUL AND INDIPENDENT WOMAN" and for some reason suddenty everyone in the movies is like "Eww woman cant be a pirate" like Elizabeth didnt exist in the previous movies
Idk why but the italics threw me off, you rarely see those in UA-cam comments
I really like Stranger Tides. It's kinda like those short story books where the hero goes on a new adventure each chapter. I like the first 3 movies but it got really long and the plot became real complex to understand the entire story in one sitting. I think the POTC series would be more fun if everything wasnt so tightly connected and they could play around with crazy concepts like in ST, and it's all just another chapter of the adventures of Captain Jack Sparrow
@@highdefinition450 I use italics for official titles and quotes. I guess because I'm autistic and I'm very specific about stuff like that.
"probably magic again, doesn't really matter, does it"
Pretty much sums up this whole franchise
So true
I feel like the first three mostly made sense. They were overall better movies anyway
@@onnih4482 yeah, this is my least favorite one, but i like it.
Pitch guy: “Well, Kiera Knightly costs a lot more now.”
Director: “She should definitely stay on land more then…”
"Right, because she's his daughter...is what you seem to have written"
Stating a fact that you don't find believable is tight
There is a great moment when Koreena asks Barbosa what she is to him. He says, "Treasure". Geoffrey Rush is such a great character he makes the scene special.
Actually, It made me cry. Rush is special, great, and Barbossa was the best
Rush = actor, Barbossa = character
Then you must enjoy soap opera, it's full cringe like that
Screenwriter guy: "And then she says her name is Rey Skywalker!"
Producer guy: "What¿?”
Screenwriter guy: "Oh sorry I mean and then she says her name is Carina Barbossa!"
„So wait, if Poseidon exists in this film, this changes the whole premise of gods we established in the third movie”
“I need you to get aaaall of my back about mythology”
We will just have Calypso return in Pirates 6 and say she's gender fluid.
Poseidon is her masculine name
@@zom8680 Oh please you should hear actual mythology about Loki.
If only there was a way to go back and look at the mythology of the franchise……
Well in the first movie they established that the Aztec gods exist and have powers but they never showed up again, maybe the same will happen with Poseidon
@@ExtremeMadnessX Loki is explicitly a shapeshifter de to the whole "trickster god" thing.
Calypso is some sort of Sea Goddess, no guarantee she can shapeshift unless she incarnates or something.
“Maybe when you get cursed it comes with an instruction manual.”
Ya know…he’s got a point there regarding like ANY mainstream movie that involves a curse honestly.
But who reads instruction manuals? 😋
You have to read a very detailed manual to know what you can and can't do. That's part of the curse!
Producer guy: Can you elaborate more?
Screenwriter guy: Sigh... Okay.
I felt that.
"Ooohh I like the way ya money!"
Worthy of Eugene Crabs lmao
"So the main villain is not allowed to stand on land"
"Didn't we already do the same thing with Davy Jones?"
"Oh, I forgot about him! Whoops!"
"Whoopsie!"
"So anyways let me tell you about the end credits scene starring Davy Jones"
Making a pitch meeting for the -movie- documentary "Idiocracy" is super easy, barely an inconvenience! You should do it!
Agreed. Especially if the meeting guy keeps telling him they don't do documentaries.
Reality: After the curse was broken Will died because his heart is in a box buried somewhere.
Reality: There are no such thing as curses (that work).
@@RRSmurf oh, I disagree. I curse a lot, and people seem to mind that, so it must work.
@@pvshka Oooh sharp *tips hat *
@@RRSmurf hahah thanx ☺️
It could be argued or retconned that the magic that caused that was based on a curse, or that the entire "living while his heart is in a box" thing was a curse in and of itself so when the trident was broken and all curses were lifted, Will's heart magically left the box and went back into his chest so he could live normally.
‘And then we’re gonna see how jack got his outfit, like his hair bead, hat, compass.’
‘Doesn’t it kinda ruin some of the mystery regarding Jack Sparrow that he gained all his recognizable accessories in the aftermath of one particular adventure? And wait, didn’t Tia Dalma say he got the compass from her?’
‘Look sir, I need you to get all the way off my back about that.’
Too bad there’s no way to go back and look at the history of the franchise to make sure the storytelling and myths and legends all line up and make sense.
Yea was waiting for a comment about the compass and Tia Dalma at that point
I was curious about that. I read on the website that Jack went to Tia Dalma to get the compass for Captain Morgan. Then, when Morgan died, he gave it back to Jack.
@@abubzlife8733 but you have to remember. What if Money!
Look, if you explain something with an event in the past doesn't fully make sense, you can then make an origin movie for that again. Like, where did those people get these items and why did they think Jack would like them?
It's the Curella way of just making origin-stories after origin-stories until the dawn of time. Maybe dawn of time had some nice hear-beads?
This movie murdered the POTC continuity
"So it must be difficult to break the trident of Poseidon - God of the Sea"
"Actually it's gonna be super easy, barely an inconvenience"
Ah yes, there it is
And to add the part everyone seems to forget is a part of that catchphrase [at least like 99% of the time] "Oh really?"
Of course kratos will agree
they hit it
Hello again
shut up dude
‘So how does Barbossa learn she is his daughter?’
‘Well, sir, he gave her the journal with the jewel and Jack reminds him of this girl Barbossa used to know.’
‘Knew when? If Jack knew her too doesn’t that imply Barbossa dated her when Barbossa were still Jack’s first mate?’
‘Yeah, I guess that would be when that took place.’
‘But isn’t Henry and Corina supposed to be about the same age? Jack wasn’t Captain on the Black Pearl for over 8 years before the first movie and Henry isn’t conceived until the end of the third.’
‘Look sir, I need you to get all the way off my back about that.’
‘Okay then, let me get off that thing!’
- Oh yeah. Whoops.
- Whoopsie.
Some pregnancy last longer than usual
how come ?
So the movie can happen :)
ya ya ya
"Whatever. I don't care."
It’s a big sea. Possible jack and barbosa have been buddies for a long while
I mean, she could have been someone Jack met when they were younger. So, Barbossa had a preexisting (maybe on again, off again) relationship with her and just had the kid more recently. That wouldn't be unusual.
Didn’t even mention how the movie changes how Jack got his famous compass, in the second film it’s revealed that he bartered for it from Tia Dalma/Calypso which makes sense that she would have a magical object like that in her possession.
Another weird thing about the compass is now there’s the rule that if you “betray it”, it will unleash your greatest fear.
1) Jack’s greatest fear was always the Kraken but I suppose once it was dead his fears shifted
2) Why would his greatest fear be a cursed crew he doesn’t know about and thinks is dead?
3) if his greatest fear is Salazar then why does he never really seem to take the threat that seriously
4) is his greatest fear supposed to be the end of piracy and Salazar is simply a symbol of that fear thus the compass decides to release him
5) Also I guess the rule of the compass is so strong it can override other curses?!
There’s a lot more I want to ask but I’ll leave it at that
Jack never takes anything seriously because he's kind of drunk pretty much all the time so that answers question 3. I have no idea about all the other stuff you mentioned though.
@@RialVestro there’s plenty of moments in the first three films where Jack takes things seriously like confrontations with a villain or when he gets backstabbed or when a friend gets hurt, it’s happened on multiple occasions.
@Jon Guiriba oh ok well let me get off of there!
@@DovahkiinMaster172 I can't think of a single moment where Jack has ever been concerned about anything at all. He was never angry, never sad, never scared. Even when he's about to be hanged, or when he got stabbed, and I mean he basically dove head first into the Kraken. Actually, now that I think about, the only time he's mildly upset is when Elizabeth destroyed all the rum on the island. Which makes sense.
The simplest answer is
"Please get all the way from my back, sir"
I like that actual rage is starting to shine through the cracks of this dude's performance.
Know any true movie lovers who aren’t exasperated by now with Hollywood garbage?
Rage is TIGHT
It’s a combination of rage and sheer confusion at the incompetence I think.
"No Rey, I am your Grandfather."
"No. No. That can't be true. That's impossible. Noooo!"😭
I see what you did there. But he doesn't cut her hand off.
@@rubioblack Or will he?
@@kittycatmeowmeow963 🤣😂🤣
I understood that reference
The “which is a thing he’s able to do… that I’m just mentioning now for the first time.” bit was hilarious.
“I’m just not sure we have to do that whole Carina is a Barbossa thing…”
“Well sir ever since Vader was Lukes father all movies have to at least try and make a father reference - research shows most of the paying audience have fathers.”
Apparently there's even a freaking day dedicated to them
@@lunaitc wow wow wow wow.
..... I see what you did there.
@@lunaitc what a perfect timing
I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate.
“How many of these movies did you wanna make ?”
“How many numbers are there?”
"Well that depends how many money we can make"
"Ohhhh very exciting!"
"Yeah Yeah Yeah!"
@@Tempus0ptic Yeah yeah yeah!
Same is more true about MCU...there are 20 freakin movies
@@johnsnow2199 so ,and how many characters the MCU can adapt ,that exists in the comics ,since its their source material ?They’ve barely scratched the surface LOL !😂😂
Guy: idk, maybe when people get cursed it comes with instructions menu
Director: *tHaTs MaKeS sEnSe*
All of the curses in this franchise must have long instructions with them, otherwise how could characters know how to break them?
Handbook for the Recently Deceased probably has a sequel on curses
When the girl at the end announces her new last name I was thinking "is this like a Disney trope or something?"
I love how Ryan attacks this movie and the Star Wars sequels at the same time
"Vaguely nautical" is good way to describe those movies.
Vaguely movies is a better way to describe them.
I like the way vaguely movies money, super easy….
“Yeah~ I don’t care.” Should be the slogan of Disney nowadays.
Followed by "You're an istaphobe if you don't like it."
i mean we're at the end. the culmination of all these idiotic fantasies theyve been spewing our whole lives.
That does sound like their slogan these days.
that and "I like the way ya money" given how theyve bought pretty much everything at this point
Making pitch meetings for all the pirates of the Caribbean movies is tight.
[P.s: Usually by the 5th time spaces tend to get loose (wink wink) but making pitch meetings are always tight.]
“Yah-yah-yah-yah!”
It must be really difficult to keep making these things.
Wow wow wow, wow
@@Drü_W11823 not at all. It's super easy, barely an inconvenience.
@@Drü_W11823 actually, it’s super easy and barely an inconvenience.
Ryan you are a national treasure. Keep these coming and we'll keep watching. Love using your catch phrases in everyday conversations.
Fun fact, in Japan, this movie is called "Pirates of Caribbean: 最後の海賊" which translates to Pirates of the Caribbean: The Last Pirate. Clearly the same people responsible for Star Wars: Disney Disaster had something to do with these movies. Lol
I'd say the title "The Last Pirate" is even more nonsensical, because we still keep making new pirates to this very day!
Pirates of the Caribbean: Backstroke of the West perhaps?
The whole potc franchise in one quote: "he's from the other movies"
Awesome, now we can have a hour long compilation of Pirates of the Caribbean pitches.
Re-watching pitch meetings I've already seen is TIGHT.
"yeeeaaah I don't care"...sums up the storytelling of this franchise perfectly.
And the F&F... We need a crossover!
Either Dom and crew /fam goes so fast they travel back in time, or Jack gets some spell to go forward magically, neither will surprise.
Not the franchise..only the last movie
6:18 "And so what happens with the souls of the dead now, wasn't it kinda Will's job to bring them in the afterlife?"
"Yeah they're dead anyway so it feel like it doesn't matter"
That's so accurate i can really see disney script writers go like this XD
Alternate video title: A man telling a tale about another man who claims to tell no tales but proceeds to actually tell tales in the tale
"They get away with that stuff all the time in soap operas" killed me!
“I thought you said dead men tell no tales. You just said that.”
“Ooohh yeeeaaahh…WHOOPS!”
Whoopsie
Also this movie has the most "jumping over shark" moment - wneh shark jumps over you.
Please tell me you guys know where the phrase "jumping the shark" comes from
@@WolfJax in the next Pirates movie Henry Winkler will be jumping the Black Pearl while being pulled by a megaladon on the world's first water skis
@@WolfJax 6
@@curtbalch2321 now I want to see this lmao
@Latest Obsession yeah now I think about, it does actually lmao
"They hit it, and it breaks"
I'm dying.
How Ryan never managed to break his back from carrying this channel is amazing
"Does everybody have to be related all the time?"
"Yeah, 'cuz that automatically makes it good story telling."
Not even kidding, I just got back from a family reunion. We sang songs and told stories there.
We already set up a sequel for 2023.
Amazing
Yeah yeah yeah
Do update us on that 🤐😉
Family is tight.
"Does everybody have to be related all the time?"
"Yeah, 'cuz that automatically makes it good story telling... ... brother!"
*Dun dun dun!*
If there's a new Pirates of the Caribbean movie I expect at least one of the female characters to be Jack Sparrow's daughter
"all the time I was wondering how he got those fricking hairbeads …"
Oh god … it's like Solo - a Star Wars stoyr all over again
This series gets better and better. No signs of slowing down.
Unlike The Pirates of the Caribbean movies.
As long as they keep making crappy movies.
As long as you were talking about Ryan and not Pirates....because Pirates has long since ground to a huge halt.
This movie was so boring and nonsensical, the only thing I remember is how demotivated poor Johnny Depp was to play the shell of a great character he created 12 years ago.
could have been due to what was going on at that time :/
"Were gonna keep having this conversation as long as it keeps making us money"
Every single sequel pitch ever
*”He’s/She’s from the other movie!”*
Such an underrated catchphrase
This has the same energy as Rey being a Palpatine but if she was only introduced in ep. 9.
edit: dammit, posted this before reaching the end
"How does everybody know these very specific curse rules?"
"I don't know, maybe when you get cursed it comes with an instruction manual."
"That makes sense!"
Sheer genius 😂
Yeah and that's actually a good point. I could buy them knowing in the first movie because they apparently heard of the curse *before* stealing that treasure so it's safe to assume the rules for it were written somewhere, but it IS a bit weird that Salazar would know when his curse didn't have any background.
Snorted tea out my nose.
i know it's been said before, but these pitch meetings really are better than the actual movies
I haven’t seen the pitch meetings for the other four films. I just came here to watch him bash on this movie, because it deserves to be bashed. Hard. You’re right though. This video is more fun to watch than the actual movie
"Ooohhhh motivated offspring is TIGHT!"
"BLOOD!"
Wouldn't be a good day without mah boy talking to himself.
Ok, but remember he isn't wearing any pants.
What are you talking about? They are clearly different people. Producer Guy has limited eyesight whereas the other guy doesn't.
I dont see him talking to himself.
@@BiggusNickus Hence neither of them is wearing pants.
@@sergio.h1985 Good catch, that is his cousin. The rest is CGI and stop motion.
"It sounds like this is going to be the most consequential Pirates movie ever. Too bad no one is going to care about what happens in it."
"Yeah but Kiera Knightly is expensive now"
lol
What this movie also forgot is that Davy Jones became the way he was because he wasn't doing his job. Will was ferrying the dead, so there's no reason why he should've turned into a sea creature.
"Maybe when you get cursed it comes with an instruction manual." 🤣
I want to see the "congratulations: you're cursed!" guidebook
producer guy: what about captain salazer's ship ?
screenwriter guy: well just recycle the flying dutchman and cover its deck with lanterns. it will be super easy, barely an inconvenience
“Yeeeeeeeah I don’t care” slays me every time 🤣. Perfectly encapsulates what assuredly was the scriptwriting process.
Thank you for being so satirically constructive with Pirates of the Caribbean and for avoiding giving my man Johnny Depp a harder time than he already has.
"Wasn't his appearance part of his curse? That shouldn't still be on his head." "Yeahhh....I don't care!!!" _dying_ I mean this is increasingly all movies and TV. I mean what are the audiences going to do? Just...GASP!...not watch or something??
Not watch so this garbage doesn't make any money so they start taking seriously. Be the change you want to see or whatever that saying is supposed to be.
It’s more fun seeing garbage get made fun of. 😃
To be fair, it is implied Jones' claws and other things fall off, at the very last scene...
@@kitlee172 This. My wife and I are now more excited to catch pitch mtgs, honest trailers, EWW, and HISHE than the ACTUAL MOVIE.
I seem to have forgotten most of this movie. I did like the charred + watery hair of the cursed crew though upon rewatching some scenes.
Special effects are tight!
"Who are you?"
"Corina.... Corina Skywalker."
(Roll credits)
Pitch Meeting Requests:
Godzilla (1998)
Jumanji (1995)
Jumanji The Next Level
The Conjuring
Annabelle
Night At The Museum
Umbrella Academy
Camp Cretaceous
Scream
Pixels
Pitch Perfect
I still would like "The Birth of a Nation"... just to have a silent Pitch meeting with cue cards.
FireFly
Hell yeah umbrella academy
Just gotta drop these here real quick tho
Demon Slayer Mugen Train
The Room
I could have sworn he did Jumanji The Next Level ?
@@gts560 nah he didn't
I totally forgot will got his heart cut out... HOW IS HE STILL ALIVE😂😂
He’s all better now shut up
5:40 you'd think the Trident of Poseidon would be A LOT MORE SOLID than a GLASS BOTTLE
“Hope you enjoyed that video”. You know we did. We always do
If only there was an extra thumbs up video.
"I like the way you money"
I'm stealing this quote
"He said the name of the movie"
I love hlw excited he is
The ROS zinger at the end was beautiful.
"But wasn't Davy Jones appearance due to his curse"?
"Yeah I don't care anymore"
"when you get cursed, it comes with an instruction manual"
"because curses often involve riddles"
Must be an IKEA manual
It says a lot that Jack is barely mentioned in this pitch meeting.
Why though
@@goldfire1 Jack does nothing in this movie. He just bumps around. The new writers clearly didn't understand the character and they just turned him into a joke.
So Jack is just kind of there?
@@thomasraines1396 Worse. He's there but he's a complete clown.
@@MatiZ815 So he's there, but as what a 5 year old would describe him.
'He said the name of the movie.'
'Roll credits.' *ding
Everything wrong with dead men tell no tales in jar of dirt minutes
“Maybe when you’re cursed it comes with an instruction manual”
Careful now! Last time a lucrative franchise came with mention of a manual, we got _Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them!_