6 Things "Polite" Passengers Do That Drive Cruise Crew Crazy!
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- Опубліковано 1 бер 2024
- I used to think of myself as a considerate cruise passenger, trying to be polite and help make the crews’ jobs simpler, easier, and more pleasant. But I’ve had to reappraise what I was doing after a crew member discreetly told me on this cruise that I am on that some were having the opposite effect, and could get them into trouble with their boss, affect their ability to get a promotion, and even whether their contract would get renewed.
Surprised by this, I asked the cruise director, waiters, shore excursion staff, guest services, guest entertainers and speakers, and of course my stateroom attendant, what well-intentioned things I was doing on a cruise that I should stop, and importantly be doing instead. The answers were eye-opening.
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One thing I do when I leave feedback about someone going above and beyond in any kind of service is not be too specific. I'm never sure what may be looked down upon by upper management (e.g. a crew member on RCL gave my son a free scoop of ice cream after he had a bad fall and was inconsolable - my son wrote him a hand written thank you note for being nice, and I mentioned his attentiveness in the survey, but we didn't mention the free ice cream).
That is a great idea and very helpful example. Even though you and your son appreciate the kindness, the company may just see *"you gave away extra food."* Very true.
You are a smart woman. 👍
😊
Good call
Oh dang. I didn't think so deep. I hope i didnt get them in trouble 😢.
Every single piece of advice here is applicable THROUGHOUT the service industry, be it at a restaurant, a hotel, an event venue...
You read my mind. Just remember your manners, behave appropriately and put your positive feedback on the survey.
Good point!!!
I was thinking the same thing. People treat bedside nurses the same way. They have assignments, and they're crossing them off their list. In nursing school, I was told to do patient education while hanging an IV.
Yes, even a cable tech saying to a customer after completing the work "If you like my work, please let the company know!" Other techs would dislike that I got numerous emails and calls and letters to the company about how they liked my making paying for cable services worth the money they paid because I gave them the best product available. They could have done the same, but maybe their work was not the same so they got jealous.
I work in retail and worked in food service. Those customer service surveys are primarily a masturbatory exercise for management. Every place that I've worked, anything other than a 9 or 10 counts as a zero. So you think "the service was good but not excellent so I'll give them an 8" which becomes a zero.
In general, management doesn't care too much about the positive comments because that just means that the staff is doing their jobs.
Really good advice. On our last cruise, we had a great room attendant who I spoke with a couple times. He mentioned he had a young daughter who missed him and who he tried to call anytime they were in port. I thought about getting her a gift from the ship and leaving it in our room. Then I thought it was probably presumptuous to think he would want that and in any case if he did, he could buy it for her himself. Kid doesn’t want a gift from a random other dad her dad had as a guest. I just left him a good tip.
Now that is a proper thank you. 👍
Plus, even if you did buy it, he may not be allowed to accept it. So, it would just go to waste.
That was very kind of you to think like that.
I'm polite but never do these things. I guess I have a different definition of being polite. I can't imagine ever asking a crewmember to hang out. That's crossing the line.
This video should be titled: “rich posh man learns he’s out of touch with the service industry”
@@pile_of_kyle That's unfair. He's friendly with the people who serve him. That's the _opposite_ of what you describe.
@@Milesco it’s blunt, but fair. someone who has worked in the service industry would know that many of these behaviors create problems for staff, regardless of intention. someone who is out-of-touch with the reality of working in the service industry wouldn’t know. people being paid to serve you are, more often than not, being friendly and engaging with you because they are paid to do provide you with that experience. the proper execution of their job (their entire reason for being there) requires them to perform services with a pleasing and warm personality while demonstrating unobtrusive professionalism. anyone who mistakes these interactions as emanating from neutral power dynamics is out-of-touch. this man has done well to care enough to challenge his behaviors, solicit honest feedback, and use his behavior as an example of what not to do for other out-of-touch posh travelers.
Disagree. If Gary was out of touch & posh he’d be treating people like my r crap & complaining & getting people in trouble
@@pile_of_kyle No, if he were rich and posh he’d know this isn’t how one interacts with staff.
I follow most of the major cruise channels and thank you for producing something original instead of, "10 things not to do in the buffet line," "10 things to pack," and other tiresome topics that keep getting recycled. Your original content shows respect for the people that follow your channel.
Seriously. Those same regurgitated lists are so tiresome, and unnecessary. There's not a single "thing to pack" specific to cruises that I've ever needed that I wouldn't also bring on a beach vacation. You got clothing, swim suit, sunscreen, toothbrush, and toothpaste? Then you're good.
I once heard someone in a video recommend going grocery shopping so you don't have to leave your cabin. I stopped the video right there.
@@CydeWeysThe few that do hit me with the things to pack or things not to pack are ones that are more specific to cruising in areas or lines. Or were for other reasons than general lists.
While it wasn't on this channel, one that really did help me was one that I've since lost track of that was by a pharmacist who went through a lot of over the counter medication (in the US and Canada) that would get you in legal trouble in different areas on cruises. He also went into ways to either be able to use it (in some places,it would just require a prescription to have it) along with some potential alternates that might be available if you would need them in those areas that didn't have the issue. There was also a supplementary one about some more common prescription drugs that had the same issues...and, later on started going with a country by country thing trying to do the same for destinations.
@@petergilbert144Lol, why in the world would they even want to go on a cruise in the first place?🤪
@@petergilbert144 everyone is different and wants different things on a cruise/holiday. I think it would be a horrible experience. Not for me at all.
While not on a cruise I was told by wait staff in a nice restaurant that stacking plates gets them in trouble because if the customer has time to stack plates, then they were not clearing the table quick enough
I do little things like gathering the forks and knives together on one plate, and that's it. They always smile, a real smile, not the fake one they give you 99% of the trying to make you feel special when all they are calculating is how much tip they can weasel out of you.
A nice restaurant doesn't rush guests either. Having time to stack the plates is part of what you're paying for when you use their table and place setting. There is a difference between the eat-n-run kinds of restaurants that masquerade as fine dining.
@@timothyleggon a cruise they want you in and out under an hour.
It's annoying when you do that because you can't clear correctly
So to not get them in trouble i have no table space.Pick up your dishes and people won't stack them. Its called prebussing your table.
Frankly, most of these highlight to me how horrendously cruise lines treat their staff. The constant surveillance, lack of trust, overworking and threat of punishment. If that was any company on land anywhere in the EU, the law would come down on them like a ton of bricks. That is not how you treat staff and it should not be legal.
That was pretty much my takeaway, as well. Glad to see I'm not the only one.
This. How horrible and stressful to have to work under such conditions.
I have to admit that I thought similar things. What a horrible environment.
Reading this really brought home just how poor the working conditions are. You've also described the labor conditions for a big chunk of the US.
edited to add that this is why I'm so reluctant to speak up at all. It puts the staff in a difficult position
How sad that you believe maintaining standards equates to horrendous treatment of employees. Constant surveillance? Yes, there are supervisors monitoring your work. Threat of punishment? This is not accurate, the only "punishment" is either losing your job or not getting your contract renewed - the exact same as any other job (if you don't perform up to standard you will be gone). Many of the cruise line jobs that are tip based are highly sought after because they can earn far more there than they could in their home country.
I can’t imagine how many crew members get sexually harassed or assaulted by guests and are terrified to lose their jobs if they say anything.
I would assume that cruise liners wouldn't tolerate sexually harassment or assault against staff by guests. If a guest is harassing/assaulting staff then they'd also be a danger to other guests. Not to mention the legal exposure of staff exposed to harm, suing.
This is where being introverted is a real advantage. You'll never catch me holding a prolonged conversation with a stranger if I can get away from it! But I have a hard time resisting cleaning up around the table after we eat. My kids are so messy, I feel so guilty leaving the crumbs and mess for anyone else to clean up.
I think cleaning up crumbs etc is not so bad but what the staff don't like is guests piling plates up etc. in a way which we feel is logical to us but then the staff just have to disassemble our half-baked efforts at tidying up and re-do it the way that is most efficient in terms of transport and loading into dishwashing areas etc.
I have been on a lot of cruises as a solo passenger, and I am a bit OCD when it comes to my stateroom. I get up in the morning, make my bed, have a shower, get dressed, put all my clothes away in draws or the closet and leave zero evidence I was even there at all. We'll, this has caused no end of grief and much anxiety for some stateroom attendants, but I simply can not leave my room in a mess! That's just the way I am. Some have even asked if I even slept in my room that night or jokingly enquired, "Who's room did you end up in last night?" 😂
@ozymandias7940 the room attendant has to make the bed anyways so make their job easier by messing it up 😂
I think doing that is different from picking up your dishes etc, and carrying them somewhere else, It looks like you've waited long enough for them to do it, so you'll take care of it. That's not the case, but it could simply look that way to a supervisor.
@@ozymandias7940Interesting. I’ve only been on a couple cruises but I had a similar approach to you. It’s really weird because I’m a bit of a messy slob at home or when working on a task, but when I’m on a cruise, in a hotel or somewhere not “mine” I tend to clean up after myself and leave no trace of my presence!
My supervisor at work has gotten used to this habit. I clean a lot of aircraft as ground crew and while I’m working the place looks like a bomb has gone off. I leave my cloths, sprays and other knickknacks all over the cockpit or galley or whatever I’m assigned to while I’m working. It’s all part of my mental map and everything has a place and reason. But when I’m done, it’s hospital level sterile!
Same with my hotel room or cabin. Messy during the evening but spotless the next morning. My supervisor is reasonably intelligent and often makes use of my traits to ensure the important areas of the airliner are spotless. He just ensures that I have sufficient time and resources then just leaves me to it.
Not gonna lie though, I’ve probably mildly confused some pilots when they reach the aircraft early, looked through the doorway to find the cockpit absolutely littered with cleaning supplies and cloths with me awkwardly crammed into some corner or another industriously scrubbing away. 😆 90% of the time they just back away and find something else to do until I’m done. Didn’t think anyone else was like me tho.
Wow, a lot of the things that cause problems for cruise staff also cause problems on my job as a nurse. I dread a family that really likes me and wants to talk strictly because it takes time away from my patients. A lot of similar situations. Some of these situations must apply to a lot of working people.
Unfortunately these would be the same people who be upset because you didn’t rush to their family members aid. Too many people want to make it a social event.
Mostly its the patients family or spinal patients that take a lot of time leaving little for the others.
yes, I agree....they smile to your face, and write up a note afterwards about THAT nurse. Just to feel better. Don't worry....we all know you you are...
I also work in a Hosp, and the timing thing can most def be an issue, I never want to be rude, so, I listen with all my attention, then tell them that, I better get back, I have a job I need to do, then laugh. It's works every time.
I work at a public library and handling people who come in only to talk is a big part of the job. Especially elderly people, mentally disabled adults and douchebags who people that aren't trapped by having to be service minded wouldn't talk to. It can be really tricky not to hurt someone's feelings when you have to end what they perceive as a nice chat (or in the douchebags case a refreshing rant) because you have other tasks you have to do or other patrons to serve. Especially the developmentaly disabled can have a really hard time understanding that I can't just talk to them my whole shift. But I think every service job has to handle people that don't understand the notion of "me being nice to you while I work does not make us friends"
I never understood the concept of buying a worker or entertainer a drink. As someone who doesn’t drink alcohol, I would never want this. You can’t assume people drink overall or that they don’t just abstain when working, as they should.
It's just a part of tipping culture, and it doesn't necessarily need to be an alcoholic drink. I'm sure most people would gladly pay for a non-alcoholic drink if they're offering anyway.
I was at a concert in Vegas. Small venue. A person bought the group a round of drinks. The lead singer thanked them and took two drinks explaining the guitarist was under 21. 🙄 You never know who doesn’t or can’t drink.
Could you just not take it as the compliment it is meant as?
I also would think not to purchase a drink because they're technically working anyway.
It's just a traditional way of offering a tip - they can just take the price of a drink as a tip.
I cannot agree with you more in regards to BOUNDARIES. I never lose sight of the fact that I am the guest and they are the employee. I show my appreciation quietly with CASH.
So true. I work in a service industry and I appreciate short conversations that get to the point. I'm not your friend. I don't have time for or care what your back story is. Just tell me what I can do for you. If you're pleased with my service, let my employer know. Most people only contact employers to complain. A compliment goes a long way.
@@Lovesapuzzlethis is how I feel, backed up by the fact of how many seriously embarrassing conversations I've witnessed between guests and crew...
...let's just say some of them have that Johnny colonial speaking to the the exotic foreigner vibe which must be tiresome.
The only longer conversations I've had have always been crew initiated one because my server was coming to the UK and was asking me questions and other because he started joking about cricket (Indians loved their cricket!).
Funnily , one the cricket one I think I was doing hi a favour I don't even watch cricket!
@@NarrativeEscapes I think the key is to recognize spoken and unspoken clues. When one end of the conversation wants it to be short, the other should respect that.
I hope you do discretely....if others see it they are expected to share it.
@@NarrativeEscapes And you thought it was about a game! Doncha no he was talking about the accidental vegan meal he gave you of ground up crickets and soy?
When I was waitstaff, it was nice when people didn't absolutely lay waste to the table, but otherwise, if you've got dirty paper napkins and straw wrappers gathered on one plate for easy disposal, that's helpful from a germ perspective as well. Just about anything else guests do can complicate bussing the table, though. Enjoy your meal, and feel free to keep little bits of trash in one dish if you're so inclined.
I made sure my children cleaned up after themselves and didn't make a mess. I wish more parents would teach their children proper table manners. My son thanked me for "hounding" him about this as he can eat and walk away from the table without half the food on him and he's at a military college!
I tend to move everything to the part of the table most accessible to staff (away from the wall or the center), stack utensils on one plate, stack garbage on one dish.
I always say Thank You to people who serve me - I was raised this way - serve the appetizer, thank you, serve dinner, thany you, etc. It’s force of habit for me.
Me too!
I do that too but now I’m going to make sure I don’t over do it. Maybe a smile part of the time would better. I’m sure we wear them out when they hear that at every table by every person.
Umm thank you is a normal way to ‘thank anyone’ bringing something over’. Not sure why you are drawing attention to that.
Maybe it's the difference between a pro-forma "thank you", like getting off a bus or getting one's meal, and one suggesting extra was done and making others want the same?
I'm Canadian, it's second nature lol
I love how you centered what the staff needs over what you thought was best, and presented it in such a clear and succinct way. Thank you for sharing this is so helpful.
On our Alaskan Cruise, we were dining at the main Dining room and it was dessert and coffee time. Their regular coffee machine broke down that evening and they served us coffee from the specialty coffee shop. He noticed that we clearly appreciated the upgrade and we got it for the remainder of the trip. We thanked him discreetly as we do believe he did an exception for us and that it’s more trouble for him. We give him rave reviews for him at the survey for this attention.
well I hope you gave him some $$ as well. A few bucks won't break any cruise guest but can make a big difference to the crew member.
Great subject Gary. Gave me a few things to ponder. As a frequent solo cruiser I often get quite friendly with the crew & contractors. I know there is that line you don't cross, but I have noticed if I talk too long they start to get uncomfortable or other staff get annoyed. Good reminder!
Do you get friendly with the room maid in hotels as well?
As another passenger waiting to be served as well😢
People, those people who work for "you" do not care about you, or your long boring story of how you got sick on the last cruise. They are NOT your friends, buds, pals and are working for a living while you lole around, fat, with your birkenstock shoes on with with knee length socks and your obese wife is off the side, spitting tobacco into the champagne glass, burping and re-adjusting her sized 70 bra and making a miserable mess of it.
I don’t think you realize how creepy you sound.
@@chrisg334 A famous rock band made a song about me. I still get residuals.
Addressing problems in person, rather than online, also applies on dry land. There's been so much mockery of people who ask to speak to the manager--but businesses actually prefer it, because it gives them the chance to immediately make things right, rather than suffer a one-star online review. As someone whose family owns a retail store, please *talk* to us, if you feel something is unsatisfactory. Thank you!!
The most common response to poor customer service is to refuse to return. That hurts the business more than anything.
@@AxelQCand the reason many people do not complain is the most common response for businesses is to get their back up and go in to ‘defence mode’ and try and shift it back on the customer. Seem it to many times from both angles.
Exactly. Which is why the business would much rather you speak up and tell them what went wrong, so they can fix it and keep you as a customer. @@AxelQC
Sadly, I've seen that happen too, and it's just wrong. Or as my Dad told me when I started working, "The customers are the reason you get to go to college, so treat them with respect."
Granted, unfortunately, there are some customers who cross the line (which is why he had to drop a no-questions-asked return policy), but most people are honest and kind, if they're treated with consideration. @@xr6lad
Totally agree. From a hospitality background and hotel ownership, if we don't know there is a problem, how can we fix it?
As the offspring of a domestic servant this hits home. I consider myself equal to those that serve me. As a result I try to make servers and service people easier.
@1cthompson you are equal to everyone. We all do different work, but that is part of life. Your work does not make you less.
Your comment about the table service clearing struck a real cord with me. When staying in motels I always wanted to tidy up before we left, so the staff didnt think we were slobs! But my sister who was a room attendant, said please, just leave it! Folding towels & making beds acually makes our job harder, when we go in to strip down a room. Its better left in a heap, easier, and quicker for them to bag & sort. 😊
What about pre-stripping the sheets and pillow cases - is that helpful?
The point about assissting in clearing tables is true even at land-based restaurants. The servers have a method for how they stack plates to maintain balance, clear food off of them, etc. You think that you're being helpful but in reality making their job more difficult.
I tend to move everything to the part of the table most accessible to staff (away from the wall or the center), stack utensils on one plate, stack garbage on one dish. I hope that is helpful. If it is not, I would appreciate finding that out.
I was actually taken aback by your observation about buying drinks for cruise entertainers. We were so appreciative of a band that peformed on a recent cruise (who coincidentally appeared in your video!) that we bought drinks for the group twice during our cruise. While they sensibly deferred their drinks until they had completed their sets for the evening, and seemed appreciative, I had no idea that it could be problematic for them.
Barricade Boys?
@@doriangray6985 , No, not the Barricade Boys.
Agreed. I was a performer on multiple lines- it depends on the company. The truth is you cannot get DRUNK with a passenger and they cannot use their drink package on you (or get caught doing so) but buying them drinks or coffee that keep them under their allowed blood alchohol level and they are: a. Allowed in the venue, b. The venue is not overcrowded, and C. Not transporting a full glass from one venue to another they are not breaking any rules on most lines.
Some managers have petty jealousy issues of entertainment crew who have more privileges than them- and will use it as a personal vendetta against some people. But there is nothing against the rules and they are the ones in the wrong.
I was hoping to see Mollie B and Squeezebox in the video 😂
A crew member going on excursions with guests definitely crosses a line. I'm surprised she didn't realise that would get her in trouble.
My first cruise was on a now defunct line with 100 pax ships. Crews were allowed to take empty spots on excursions. As a mid 20's guy at the time, I thought it absolutely terrific that my Swedish 20 year old cabin attendant and her two friends were along for a sail and snorkel trip in the Grenadines (don't remember which island it was, Mayreau or Mustique).
Definate no no.
I agree. Surely saying "I'm sorry, that's not allowed" is easy enough for them to say!
I can't say about these days but in the old days entertainers were allowed to mix with passengers. I knew many that worked on cruiselines. I guess here it was mainly how often that made things difficult. Other staff it has always been a no no.
@@mmckenzie8085 Entertainers are usually permitted to use the guest areas of the ship, so naturally they will mix with the guests to some extent while doing so. Going on shore excursions with guests goes far beyond that.
As a crew member, thank you for this video. This is all 100% correct.
Thanks for nailing this down Gary. Intuition has had me generally going in the right direction on these things but this video has helped confirm it. I feel more confident now to limit myself to thanking individual crew personally, jotting down names for the post cruise questionnaire, not trying to turn cruise members into friends and discretion in the dining room. I think sometimes cruisers misinterpret crew friendliness as an invitation to ever escalating friendliness and then crew members are in the awkward position feeling hamstrung to turn it "off". Their job is to be friendly and we can help them by keeping a mutually respectful distance whilst being friendly and appreciative in turn.🙂 Sorry I've missed so many of your Live streams lately 😭 As you know I was at sea most of January and work/personal conflicts since then + plain forgetfulness🙄. Back soon!
Thanks for watching and great that you found it interesting / thought provoking. Agree that many miss that it is just their job to be friendly!
You have to be very full of yourself if you are misinterpreting crew’s customary affability for anything else. They are there to do their jobs and not thing else. A bit of discretion and empathy.
These are very helpful tips, and I will keep them in mind for my next cruise. I also have been one to clear my table if it is just a cup or small plate. But then I tell myself that staff might not notice the crumbs or water condensation rings that I've left behind. Leaving a cup or plate on the table ensures that the table will be entirely ready for the next guest that sits at the table.
yes I was so like that !!
Hide the crumbs under the plate. 😅
I like to be helpful too. But if you make it look like the table was never used, the host/ess might try to seat the next guests there without the table having been properly sanitized.
Pretending something is alright to be able to complain about it later just sounds like a cruel setup.
Yet that's exactly how most people do it in any kind of service. I don't work on cruise ships, but can guarantee you if someone has a problem, 99% of the time they'll complain only in the surveys.
Everyone can name someone they know who will do this.
They do that to justify trying to worm out of the mandatory daily service charges that partially pay all staff members, seen and unseen. It is a snively way of being cheap, manufacturing an excuse not to tip.
I agree completely! I am a rare American introvert - I don’t really want to go beyond basic small talk. I definitely noticed slower service when our server was super chatty. I am ALWAYS respectful, tip above and beyond auto gratuities, and include names in the survey. I much prefer polite, efficient service to chatty, overly intimate service. Very un-American of me. 😂
I agree 100%.
Not un-American - that's a stereotype. There are plenty of us, myself included. And I'll relay a story from my former boss, an Ethiopian who was a tour guide in Addis Ababa before he came to this country : I asked him which foreign nationals were the best, and he said Americans and Italians (despite that little matter of Italy annexing Ethiopia). Why? Americans were so friendly and generous, and they treated everyone as equals. Be yourself, be a good representative of our country, and be proud of our country. I've traveled abroad quite a bit and that outlook has always served me well.
There are lots of introverted Americans. Relax.
Ya, shoe on other foot. Chatty servers and managers constantly begging for attention "Is every all right?" "Can I get you something else?" and refilling your water glass constantly.
I leave a very little tip or none when that happens.
It's really not rare. There are tons of us, just as in other countries.
Repeatedly, my response is to these stories is, "What were you thinking?! Of course you're violating boundaries!"
I was thinking the same thing. Inviting an employee to go on excursions with you, no matter how well-intentioned, is probably going to make that employee extremely uncomfortable. There are always exceptions, of course, but at that part of the video I was just like... oof. My man. No. Bad idea, bad idea.
Totally agreed. Most of this seems obvious to me. Also the categories he says are way too broad when the issue is not that he is being polite, it's that he would be being inconsiderate by not thinking of how his actions affect the crew.
I agree on buying drinks and inviting crew members to hang out, but clearing the table and not raising issues when asked are less obvious.
It shows a lack of understanding of boundaries and put the staff in a bad position either way
@@quailypoes at the same time, the upper management harshly reprimanding her seems like an overcorrection to the problem rather than addressing it in a respectful manner. My guess is that petty office politics seeped into it as well and why she bounced the moment her contract was up.
Cruises are just different from any other vacation. The crew lives and works together 24/7 for 6 to 9 months. We stay as their guests for 7 to 21 (or more) days in a row on a journey which is almost never in the same place twice. We sleep, eat, drink, relax, exercise, etc. all together within the confines of their workplace for the entire journey; all the while they get to worry about our comfort and safety. Then, the crew gets to do it all over again with a new set of guests. It's understandable why they would like to just do their jobs without the (seemingly) nice gestures which usually just complicate things for them.
As a former performer on multiple lines: you can absolutely buy them drinks/coffees/water bottles if they are not actively working or above their allowed blood alchohol levels. They cannot get actively drunk with a passenger or walk from one venue to another with a full glass.
Truth be told many performers will refuse a drink (and use policy as a reason) because they dont want to be "stuck" having a long drawn out interaction with a well meaning guest. Social batteries run low when youre answering the same question over and over again with guests, and sometimes they dont want to be "on."
However- if you want to offer to buy someone a drink (and yes guest areas have better liquors and cocktail selections than most crew bars) a coffee like Starbucks or a water bottle ( neither of which they get for free) and make it clear you dont expect an interaction/their attention and instead are just doing it out of a getsure of appreciation ("hey i would kovw to get you a round, no need to sit and chat with us- we know how long of a night this must be! But we figured you'd enjoy a little something on us- have a great night!" its generally not only allowed but very much appreciated.
Great episode. The only thing I would add is saying please and thank you for any services rendered. When ever a plate of food or drink is brought to me I thank them or if I ask for something else I use, please. It is a common courtesy, is so easy to do and is greatly appreciated by not only the crew but whomever you are speaking with.
I’m honestly surprised that’s not standard practice. I’ve said please and thank you for such things for as long as I remember. Funny thing is so do my friends. One got into a car crash and was charged with driving without due care and attention, accidentally missed her court date due to not having the new key for the mailbox replacement promptly and got arrested for it.
Being a normal, ordinary person when the police called her because they came to her place while she was out earlier she freely agreed to meet them to be arrested. Apparently it was the most surreal experience in her life because everyone at the police station kept staring at her. It wasn’t until they offered her a meal despite how late it was when she finally figured it out.
She was being civil, courteous and remembering her please and thank yous and the police were just *not* used to it. The custody staffer read a list of what was available so she said please while making her choice. His sudden change in expression finally tipped her off. It’s probably why she was given as much food, water and books to read that she wanted. It was pleasant for them not to be shouted and cussed at for once.
I work as a crew member in the cruise industry, and I agree with you completely.
Interesting about the Cabin steward asking repeatedly if everything was all right. On our last Cruise, we had 3 major issues with our cabin. The poor guy could only report these issue every day till 2 of them were finally resolved. We knew after a few days, he couldn't do more than report the issue. We not only gave him a good review but an extra bonus for at least trying.
I was in Vegas and I reported every day for 3 days there was something wrong with our room's A/C. Crickets.
On the 3rd day as I was packing to leave to go to another hotel in anger, a maintenance worker came in, took one look at the A/C unit's back and said "oh look here, the last guy forgot to plug in the connector for the A/C".
I have never been back to Planet Hollywood again and have told everyone going to Vegas to never stay there.
Besides, the room looked like it hadn't been updated and stuff fixed since 1970....formica tables? Green plaid drapes? Seriously?
@@mutteringmale Our ship cabin A/C wouldn't turn off, and being on an Antarctica Cruise we really didn't need A/C. Options were to move to another room, but wife is handicapped, and this was the last HC room. They offered extra blankets (laughing). They resolved the issue by stuffing a bunch of foam rubber in the Vent.
@@lynnmccurdythehdmmrc2561 YOu should mention the cruise line so no one reading this will ever use them again.
Every cruise I made all of my complaints upfront (i.e. steward doesn't need to fix the sheets on the bed every morning because I'll destroy it 5 minutes later anyway, AC can be a fridge without any issue to us without any issue, and yes, shoving a chunk of rubber under the mattress for extra leg elevation was excellent etc.) and we got along fabulously with the staff as far as we're aware. Being honest and upfront helps everyone.
We experienced this on a RCL cruise in Chops. The server spent a great deal of time with us one morning. The next morning we were seated way in the back, as I called it, "the penalty box". Thank you for all of your interesting content. Cheers
That ridiculous - punishing you for this? I would have complained to the maitre d'
Great video. I especially appreciate that your examples were mistakes that you made yourself- it shows that even seasoned travelers can make mistakes and can learn to do better!
Pretty much all employees are unwilling captives when they interface with customers. You want be polite and agreeable, but sometimes customers take it as a budding relationship, however short-term, and want to increase the amount of time interacting. It’s especially ironic if both parties are ‘just trying to be polite’.However, the staff have no choice.😬
I am, by nature, a chatty and friendly person, Thank you for letting me know it might be best to curb my enthusiasm beyond basic pleasantries.
This is good advice for anyone who is working for you. As a Handyman, the polite people are a delight to work for. When customers get too chatty, it takes away from my time working. Or worse, when I am trying to work, they keep talking and get upset when I do not look at them.
Treat everyone how you want to be treated at your job. Polite and let me get my work finished. 🤗
It always astounds me how people mistake an employee being friendly as them wanting to be your friend. THEY ARE JUST DOING THEIR JOB. Just be polite and let them get on with it
Very helpful advice! One of my most embarrassing cruise experiences happened in the main dining room when I tried to hand an empty salad bowl to the waiter and knocked over a full glass of red wine. I felt terrible, and even worse when we were moved to a fresh table and someone from management came over and insisted on replacing my wine, so your advice about leaving things alone at the table is well heard. I find the best thanks (apart from deserved gratuities) is noting the names of exceptional crew and complimenting them by name in the post-cruise survey.
I travel solo so interacting with the dining staff and my stateroom person is nice for me. I don’t think I’ve overdone it. I’m grateful for this video!
I also travel solo, and I find the dining staff and even the officers interact with me. I guess because I'm sailing and dining alone, they give me some added attention. I even got to know the manager of Cagney's (NCL) and about his family while I dine. I know he's busy, so I don't take too much of his time. But it's really nice they give me some attention. I agree: this was a GREAT video!
Have you tried the trick of not answering when they say "house keeping!" out side, of laying in bad nude with a $100 bill over your thang when they barge in?
No? Well, I guess that's just a Vegas thing.
When you are in your room you should turn the door lock so that the door is not accidentally opened.
It’s amazing how you are able to keep finding new and interesting topics. I guess that’s why you are the best at what you do😊
Thank you for sharing your experience! Most of these advices work for most hospitality/service jobs 😊 Whenever I work at the restaurant (I get rotated at our hotel 😅), although we do appreciate the customers' effort to clean their plates and bring them to us, it sometimes prevents us from figuring out where they were seated (especially during rush hour) so the waitstaff might not see where the recently vacated seats are and not able to properly clean/wipe it 😅 the best feeling to us is seeing customers really enjoying their experience and being grateful at the end 😊 of course the reviews and good feedback also makes us happy and proud of a job well done and motivates us to continue doing our best 😊 (we don't have tips here in japan so a smile and a little thank you makes us very happy!)
As a former crew member and frequent solo traveller, TIME (and timing) is the most important thing to be aware of. It works both on ships and on land, with crew members and other professionals too. Constantly asking for things to be done in a special manner for you (a main dish for lunch, a dessert at dinner etc.) puts an incredible amount of pressure on many workers (from the ones serving you, who have to pass on the requests, to the ones in the back who have to break their well-oiled routine and make time and space to do it). So many people ask for special things thinking they are the only ones doing it or in the minority, and they are most definitely not. So just be mindful and don't make a habit out of it. :) Also, no: no one is sitting in the back, waiting in the "ready set go position", twiddling with their fingers, in case a special order or request arrives. Everyone is on a very strict, tight schedule and there is no idle time or less than busy staff. 😊 In general, extra time is the hardest thing a (well-intended) guest can ask from their crew. They also sometimes feel trapped in this kind of scenario (you’re on a ship, going to see that guest for maybe a week or more, you kinda have to be extra nice and attentive), but it does cause problems for them from their colleagues (hugely underrated issue by guests) and their superior. Some other things brought up: Being overly affectionate or off-shore activities together - again, huge, hard (and I thought obvious) no. Buying someone a drink basically forces them to drink it on the spot, and that is very inconvenient. Alcohol - no, for the exact reasons you mentioned. Speciality coffees to go could be somehow more appreciated (because nowhere, not in the crew bar, nor anywhere else like the crew mess can you find good free coffee, just decent at best). But again, it’s all about the timing (for example, it’s not going to help if they're about to start an auction or talk or seminar). Even so, you must be aware of their dietary restrictions and preferences - maybe they never take it with regular milk, because they are lactose intolerant or vegan. Too much of a hassle, IMO. Helping to clear away dishes by building a stack of dirty ones at your table's corner - big no-no. Apart from how it looks (bad for the entire room, on ships or at a restaurant), waiters have their own system for clearing tables, and stacking dishes on the side messes up with that. Bonus fact: The cruise director cannot remember all of the praisers to pass on, no it’s their job to do so, as you well mentioned, so they will be forgotten often as quickly as you said them. In conclusion, even if it comes from a good place, if travelling solo (like I often do on land) or just feeling chatty, go befriend the other guests, as they really are on a vacay as you are, and also don’t feel obligated to put on a smiley face and entertain you even at their own detriment. 😊 Excellent video all in all, Gary, brilliant idea for opening up this discussion, I sometimes forget these are lesser-known facts... :)
Very interesting. I knew about don't try and "help" serving staff because it makes them look bad. I agree on giving very good reviews at the end of the cruise using the official system is the best help you can give to crew members, because that's what management sees as an aggregate KPI. And your particular cabin attendant can be identified using the database, for example. In fact in many systems, particularly good reviews or bad reviews will be flagged, and if someone is consistently getting great reviews they know this person "gets" customer service and their career prospects will be very good.
Who honestly cares about them looking bad? Treat them as human beings.q
One of my pet peeves is people who talk but have nothing to say. I watch Gary’s videos because he is informative and I always learn from him. Good job!
I’m guilty of stacking my dishes. And putting any paper things from sugar etc on my plate at the end. I’m going to stop that now that I realize that may be making their job harder. This is a great video. What we do on land may not be appropriate on a ship.
And depending on what is done, or not done, within your family, stacking dirty dishes on top of one another at the end of the meal, or between courses, may be considered offensive to other diners at the table.
It's not appropriate on land either, you just haven't yet seen a video to convince you otherwise. :) They have a very well-defined method of clearing tables and stacking dishes, messing with their system would only cause delays and make it more difficult for them to do their job. Also, it looks bad to have a stack of dirty plates at the end of the table for the rest of the room, so the waiter then needs to drop everything and rush to your table to clean it up first, because of how bad it looks. Hope this helps! :)
Putting the paper bits on a dish or similar is fine
@@LoredanaTI’ve seen videos say that about restaurants, but the comments are always filled with servers saying it is actually greatly appreciated unless you’re going to a high-end restaurant.
@@TheHcjfctc That's mainly because there's a difference between servers (proper waiting staff) that go through culinary school and learn the job (and this was the norm, no matter the class of the restaurant), and part-time or seasonal hires, that usually do everything by the ear (like how they do it at home). You can spot the first ones by noticing they don't need 5 rounds to clear your table. They serve you through your left etc. It's these small etiquette rules that used to be the norm everywhere. And those servers stayed in that profession until retirement, not just as a summer job or for some quick bucks. That's still the case in many places in Europe. But it's true that nowadays, you can barely see a flight attendant older than 30 - same thing with waiting staff. It's not seen as a profession anymore, but more like a pit stop. However (!) I can assure you that the ones working on cruise ships are properly and thoroughly trained, otherwise they couldn't handle the sheer work volume and fast pace.
I cruised with Holland America to Alaska and can’t think of anything I would have had to complain about during or after the cruise. I am always polite and friendly, and the crew were too. It is obvious that being over friendly or monopolising crew members would be unwelcome so am surprised that this would have to be pointed out to anyone. As for expecting staff to spend their spare time with you, that’s definitely crossing a line.
Many passengers mistakenly interact with crew like they are familiar close friends. They are not. Crew are meant to be friendly but arent your friend.
This was very helpful. Thank you for asking the questions and passing along the information.
Thank you for this video. I’ve cruised for years and don’t remember this topic being addressed. I’m going to be more observant on land too. A tip is what they need. A negative comment is what they don’t need.
Great little article Gary, Nice to see a content provider admitting that they don't have all the answers AND takes a very original angle. I enjoyed this one.
What a great video! On Enchanted Princess last year, our lovely concierge went out of his way to have my friend and I invited to the 360, which was by invitation only at that time. We were absolutely thrilled but made sure to thank him privately as we knew this would not be possible for other guests seated around us. I have taken small personal gifts for a couple of crew we had met on previous cruises and stay in touch with, but given them in a more private manner. I am also guilty of trying to "help" with tidying up and will be more mindful of how it affects the crew going forward.
This is why I love your channel, Gary! Such thoughtful content.
Very helpful tips Gary, thank you for sharing this information.
This is great to know! I like to go out of my way to show appreciation. I would NEVER want to have the opposite effect.
This is without doubt the most valuable and helpful video I've yet seen on cruising. ✨
Good manners, thoughtfulness and consideration for waiting staff and servers should be everyone's starting point, either on land or sea.
But the insights of ships' crews that you offer are very helpful, thank you. I suspect there are many people who clumsily attempt to express their appreciation and but sadly cause only misery. ❤
Very eye opening, thank you for sharing.
That's what I love about this channel, tips like these are so important and comprehensively make noob cruisers and I guess even seasoned cruisers, get off to great start os continued journey, brilliant episode, Gary...!
Wow - very helpful! Like you, I mostly travel solo and have been doing a few of these things thinking I would be making the crew’s jobs easier! This is really excellent information for people who are just trying to do the right thing by helping us do it better! Thanks much!!!
I went on a cruise once where my cousin was working there, when I saw them for the first time I gave them a hug fortunately no one seemed to mind. I tend to give chocolate bars with my tips I started when I did a halloween cruise and they loved it so much I kept doing it. I also normally give a bonus at the end of the cruise along with some toiletries like toothbrushes or toothpaste. As my cousin works on a ship I know how hard it is to get them especially as thier off days may not coincide with a port day.
Very helpful. The specific examples made it easier for me to think about things I have done and will stop doing. Thank you!
This is why your channel is the best. Great info that I will keep in mind for my upcoming cruises.
Thank you for a very informative video, Gary. My wife and I are always determined to be good cruise guests, and we want to be perceived as polite, and not causing trouble. I don't think we have ever inadvertently done something the crew members dislike, but it's helpful to know beforehand. I appreciate these new tips. Thanks again.
I agree on number one: complain, but nicely, politely and constructive when necessary. That being said, for the most part, the excursions desk doesn't care.
Tell them first and don’t put it on the survey unless something was really wrong. The survey is way more important than most people realize. They think they are just critiquing the experience. You could get someone fired.
Ah...take that a step further....you think anyone in the world cares if you live or die? If you realize that, welcome to growing up.
@@mutteringmale Well... I don't know who you are of course BUT I would be saddened if I read you just kicked the bucket! I don't think your comment was very nice but you are entitled to your snarky opinion.
@@Puzzler-qv2hn Without snarky, sarcastic free thinking free speakers you would still be slaving in the salt and silver mines.
Treasure us, bathe us in lavender, pet us, parise us for we are your last bastion before the dark night takes us all.
This is really great information. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you Gary! This was very helpful. And thank you for having the courage to ask uncomfortable questions!
Thank you sir for educating us on how we can express our gratitude in effective ways.
Great video, good points and tips 😊. My son was a waiter at a country club and he used to to hate it when the guests would stack their dishes (with the best of intentions), he said said it made his job more difficult because there is a technique that they use to clear the table. I would never have thought it was an issue until he told me.😂
Been waiting for a video like this for years! Thanks for taking the time to do this, really interesting.
This is really helpful information. Thank you.
You have really opened my eyes. We Canadians also tend not to make waves. I will certainly put your input into my next cruise. Thank you so much
overall excellent message. Though I would say you should have better differentiation between "polite" and otherwise over-sharing/taking time/etc. You often conflate the two. There is no situation where you shouldn't be polite. Politeness is something that you should always do for all people in all situations.
The biggest thing in these situations is just to think about the impact of what your interaction is having on the other person. These employees are busy, don't take up their time unnecessarily, and remember that they are at work, all interactions should remember this. For example, most people aren't allowed to drink alcohol at work, or have romantic relationships with customers. Cruise lines are no different.
overall great tips though!
Very informative video. Thank you for sharing these tips.
Great video, info that I really appreciated, thank you for tackling these issues.
Thank you, Gary.
Hadn't thought about the majority of your points before.
Viewed myself as helping when I wasn't.
Lots of food for thought for when I'm in similar situations on land as well.
Thank you for the valuable insight into how we can really help.
Thanks for watching and great that it gave you something to think about!
I bring a small note pad so I can leave my room steward a short 1 sentence note about a need or concern, if one comes up. I don't take their time away from duties by talking with them. I have found my concerns are better addressed using this method.
Once again Gary your honest and open sharing of stories all based on your personal experiences this is just one of many reasons that I think your reviews are among the very best out there. Thanks for ensuring your content is relevant and interesting to a wide audience. Keep up the great work.
Thank you, Gary. I've been reading lots of questions about what special gifts to leave for staff. Gratuities and good reviews is the answer.
Such a great video. I never would have thought that piling up plates could be unwelcome. It makes me wonder if waiters and waitresses everywhere wish we would be so “helpful.” Thanks for always providing such interesting content. Like the waitress, I’d love to hear/read about what equipment you use to get such great shots. It often looks like you must have a drone. 😊
So many of these things are obvious when you realise that these people are doing a job, not entertaining you in their own home.
*This is a truly helpful and vital video and I thank you so much for it!!* Especially the last tip because we often think we're helping the crew when in actuality, we are "stepping on their toes." Thanks!!
Thank you for this wonderful video. I am going to use your suggestions in future cruises!
This is all interesting. I guess like you say, their job is to be friendly, brief exchanges of pleasantries is all good, but mostly just let them do their jobs. We don't have special diets but that warning to NOT gush about how great the special meal/dessert tastes is a good warning, just b/c although it is well-intended, it draws attention and puts the staff on the spot and they can't just 'whip up' that same special request for others without given advance notice.
Very, very, good info here Gary. Although the thought of being a great guest originates from a good place, there may indeed be unanticipated consequences so thank you for these examples. If I may... My wife (who is from Thailand) and I were on a European destinations cruise and my wife got pretty sick. It was the ship's hair salon lady (also from Thailand) who brewed up this hot tea mix that my wife said is a very common home remedy used by "Doctor Moms" in their native country. My wife got better almost immediately and I thought the thing to do was to tell the ship's high officials about this wonderful and extra-personal care. The Thai beautician, however, explained she was acting way outside her normal area and did not want to have to explain to administrators how she had to scavenge through the galley for the various ingredients (one of which I remember was the pickled ginger from the sushi restaurant! 🤣)
I have followed you and your excellent and thoughtful commentary about cruising for some time. Your thoughts and insight about what is helpful to the crew and staff are one of the most eye-opening segments you have done. Your honesty and candor are much appreciated. I have made the same errors myself, that is, thinking my praise and actions are helping crew staff when they actually may be hurting them. Cruise lines do a great job of weeding out poor service-minded individuals, we want to be sure that those who are doing exceptional work are thanked in a way that actually promotes their career. Thank you!
Great advice as always Gary! Thanks!
Gary, thank you for your post. I have to say, though, that every tip you've given is just respect for hospitality, 101. Why would your partner even think that boasting about a special dessert to others would be OK? Why would you single out a crew member for special friendships without, at least, clearing it with their manager? Or clearing plates/cups, the crew are paid to do this and would obviously be seen as showing them up as being less than efficient. Be nice, don't go over the top, just respect people for doing their jobs and let them do that. No disrespect, I love your videos but this one is perhaps more about your faux pas?
The TV show Love Boat really messed up how the public sees cruising :)
That's an understatement!
These are great tips! From a new cruise fan, thank you for sharing with us!
Thank you for this video. It was extremely informative.
Great topic to cover!
Buying crew drinks in some circumstances could be tantamount to getting them fired. While there is a crew bar, the tolerance is very low and if a crew member exceeds it, they are dismissed...and lose their mariners' right to free repatriation back to their home countries.
I HAVE helped crew on limited occasions, such as helping the Havana deck crew gather up chair-cushions before a sudden rainstorm would have soaked them. Any boss watching would have seen us ALL pitching in, so I think it was okay. Certainly the CREW appreciated it.
Surprised at you and Mark wanting to spend time with the fitness person outside of the ship. She should have politely refused and say why she can't join you.
I really appreciate these insights. Thank you for sharing
Very on point! Agree with all of your observations. Well done!!!
Very helpful - cruising is a unique form of travel and it has its own rules.
My brother is a professional musician and he performed on cruises when he was starting out. This was quite a while ago and surely some things were different in the cruise industry back then - for one thing, the ships were so much smaller than they are now (this was the late 80s - early 90s). The musicians had to play every venue on the ship, from the poolside bars to the big shows, so they didn't have much time to hang around and chat. My brother did say that on days when they weren't performing, they had the run of the ship but by that time, the passengers were preoccupied and probably forgot who they were.
2 of the most worst things I have seen with customers and crew on a ship was once in the Haven restaurant, the Maitre'd walked around to all the tables and gave all the guests Hero cards to fill out with her name on it. It rubbed all the crew the wrong way and you felt obligated to fill it out or she would get upset. Then once a customer filled out a NCL Hero card for the Haven bartender and came down and loudly read it to him in front of 20 guests. So tacky. I wanted to ask her. Did you tip him? That is how you appreciate him. Not some public announcement in front of everyone. Because the guest was making herself feel special in front of everyone instead. She was trying to impress us, not him.
That’s terrible!!
Sounds like she was trying to game the system for her own benefit
A real eye-opener and very helpful video. Thank you.
Fantastic information!!