My Kids Are Out of Control, What Should I Do?

When your child's actions and words seem totally out of control, it means they feel out of control. In these moments, kids need our help differentiating between their behavior and their feelings: They're a good kid having a hard time, not a bad kid doing bad things. In today's episode, Dr. Becky talks with three parents about navigating tantrums at their worst. She talks through trusting yourself as your family's sturdy leader (especially when family members don't understand your approach), and walks through multiple strategies to use inside and outside of the moment.
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[@abentley2001]

So my husband and I are struggling like never before with our almost 5yr old. He can be violent, is aggressive verbally and physically, very defiant, indecisive. He flips chairs, tables, hits, bites, kicks, headbutts, doesn't listen. Prechool. Sunday school childrens ministry. The behavior is erratic and inconsistent. We are on a waiting list to be tested for autism. His 8yr old brother is diagnosed high functioning autism, ADHD, and anxiety but is NOT violent.
We never expected parenting to be this hard and realize the way we were parented will not work. We are trying. I just came across your podcast. Please send any helpful tips for when he is having episodes of aggression that we can apply. Additionally we have a 4month old. Thank you Dr Becky