How To Stop Replaying The Trauma of Narcissistic Abuse In Your Mind

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  • Опубліковано 28 лис 2024
  • Today’s Thriver TV episode reveals an important truth that you were never taught and that is likely stunting your recovery.
    This is crucial because unless you understand what is happening with the trauma you have endured, you can’t heal from narcissistic abuse.
    You may ask, “Why is that Melanie?”
    And my answer is, “Because the brain follows the body - the shift in the brain can only happen after the body shifts.”
    In other words, you won’t be able to stop or get relief from the obsessive thinking of what happened to you unless you know how to effectively release the trauma that is wedged within your body.
    I do have good news though … there is a way to bypass your head to get real relief and feel better. This will open you up to the miracles, wonder, power and joy your life can become when you start living free from internal trauma.
    Discover how in today’s video.
    ✔️Join the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program:
    melanietoniaev...
    📘 Order your copy of my book- You Can Thrive After Narcissistic Abuse:
    👀 Read hundreds of free articles on my blog:
    blog.melanieto...
    💛 Connect with the Thriver Community:
    / quantafreedomhealing
    / ​​
    pinterest.com....
    #Narcissisticabuse #MelToniaEvans

КОМЕНТАРІ • 56

  • @MelanieToniaEvans
    @MelanieToniaEvans  2 роки тому +7

    Go free from any narcissist in your life and heal in record time. Check out my new FREE 2-Part Masterclass 👉www.recoverhealthrive.com/ 🦋

    • @Jenny-wl7eo
      @Jenny-wl7eo 2 роки тому

      Thank you ❤

    • @jsl1863
      @jsl1863 2 роки тому +1

      One can get stuck in this pit by thinking that forgetting the past means the bad things never happened, which of course they did, they were unjust, hurtful and horrific, disastrous and life dreams altering, and thus one does feel or wants to be reassured about the wrongness in order to feel justification and peace.
      Forgetting it all tho’, letting go of it, lifts a burden and forgiveness floods in.
      But now and then, something can trigger a bad and sad memory, about something that was irreplaceable or destructive.
      Then it’s time to get moving, look up instead of down.
      You make so much sense. It’s uplifting.🙂

  • @rosalynbulloch1779
    @rosalynbulloch1779 2 роки тому +30

    Tears coming down as I watch this. I've been doing NARP for a year and have filled up an entire notebook of shifts. I didn't have just 1 N in my life, I had an entire system scapegoating me. It's just taking lots to release the junk from each of those relationships. These videos encourage me to keep going.

    • @chrisdahl6420
      @chrisdahl6420 2 роки тому +2

      I feel you and what you’re going through! I’m in it myself!

    • @shimmskoopelian1218
      @shimmskoopelian1218 2 роки тому +2

      Me too. I am going to start NARP as am new here but I also had both sides of the family toxic or narcs so I have cut them off or limited contact with the enablers and recently left my ex and am in a women's refuge and this us first time I'm toxic free besides seeing my ex for parenting arrangements.

    • @jennihj
      @jennihj Рік тому

      Same 😢

    • @jennihj
      @jennihj Рік тому

      What is NARP please advise?

    • @Nobodyman1
      @Nobodyman1 4 місяці тому

      Same

  • @Bornintoclusterb
    @Bornintoclusterb 2 роки тому +18

    “If you don’t go within, you go without.” Powerful words. Truth. ✨

  • @grey.knight
    @grey.knight 2 роки тому +14

    Melanie I have listened for years and finally the breakthrough happened. It is real. Targeted the feelings all day until an explosion of emotions. Thought I would die. I really understand how I was doing it all wrong for years now. Maybe some of us need to be stuck for our souls journey. Regardless of how long it took I can tell life can never be the same because I now FEEL differently. Still in an emotional daze from the adrenaline fatigue and emotional exhaustion but I now know that this is all 100% real. Thank God for your journey that you have shared - experience hope and courage.

  • @shovelheadpec
    @shovelheadpec 2 роки тому +6

    We suffer alone 😔
    It's a dark place!

  • @andayibrewmbirika2441
    @andayibrewmbirika2441 2 роки тому +9

    Sustained no contact greatly helps and im super aware of when i dwell on the narc and say aloud to stop

  • @texaspatty458
    @texaspatty458 2 роки тому +5

    Now I know where these board meetings in my head came from . So busy when you try to sleep .

    • @harlequinhead2008
      @harlequinhead2008 2 роки тому +1

      I like the way u said this... it helped me connect the dots with my sleeping issues after a bad narc relationship. Its like if u were attacked by a tiger... when r we r most vulnerable? When we’re getting ready to sleep as we stop being distracted with day things & r subconscious’ priority of protecting us from danger can be heard louder. The number 1 priority of the brain is to protect us. Narc’s r so dangerous r brain doesn’t want us to go there again so it keeps reminding us. I studied them for 4 yrs now so im more relaxed knowing that i have my checklist & i do periodic checks of spotting them.

  • @summerwind457
    @summerwind457 2 роки тому +4

    You are spot on. I have attended seminars with Joe Dispenza and Dr Lipton. I understand intellectually. But Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder affects at a much deeper level. I listen to you and Joe and Bruce and many others …BUT…the baggage that comes with the trauma is distrust and cynicism and skepticism. How does one get past the barrier that allows acceptance instead of mistrust and skepticism? I have overwhelming trust issues because of betrayal ( or at the very least perceived betrayal) by those closest to me on a familial level as well as my subsequent marital level, which became abusive after 35 years. That’s a lot of invested trust that went awry.

  • @MadelineCrow
    @MadelineCrow 2 роки тому +1

    Hi Melanie,
    I just discovered your channel and am currently reading your book "You can Thrive After Narcissistic Abuse." Having been through narcissistic abuse my entire life, your words are so inspiring and resonate with me on a deep level. I'm so glad that you got out of your relationship and that you're doing much better. This particular video hits home for me in many ways because I sometimes still think about my narcissist even though I haven't talk to her in years. However, I'm seeking therapy and am doing much better now. Keep doing what you're doing because you're helping so many people out there. You're a beautiful soul!! :)

  • @raisingarrows127_4
    @raisingarrows127_4 2 роки тому +1

    Oh my gosh I'm balling. I keep trying to figure out what to tell myself/think in order to make me feel better 😭 I keep obsessing.

  • @CammieHupp-f9s
    @CammieHupp-f9s 5 місяців тому

    Thank you so much! It hurts so bad.

  • @Elle-mz7fr
    @Elle-mz7fr 2 роки тому +1

    You are so kind and generous Melanie
    🙏🌺

  • @brightpage1020
    @brightpage1020 2 роки тому +6

    I think they target strong, capable, intelligent, caring people on purpose. They need upwardly mobile folks to sponge off of and live off of. There’s no challenge putting down like a homeless addict or whatever (no offense to anybody who is or has dealt with that pain). That’s just a bully, but to take somebody powerful over their own lives down is a real achievement for them. If it were a video game, they’d get bonus points, right? For taking down a bigger or faster target? Or one generally well armed but with insecurities or holes in their fence. Right?

  • @judihart9658
    @judihart9658 2 роки тому +3

    No contact for life.👍😎✌️🙂

  • @stanleymaestas5441
    @stanleymaestas5441 2 роки тому +1

    Yes Melanie I do completely understand now, thank u 💖 💓 💗 😘 💕 the clarity 💖 ✨️ 💕 ❤️ 💛 💗 💖. Your content is amazing. So within so without. Nameste.

  • @perrissmith8809
    @perrissmith8809 2 роки тому +3

    Mind - Body - Spirit
    💯 connected... so true
    8-10 doctors after the narcissist couldn’t figure out what my health issues were from, and couldn’t diagnose anything.... I learned from a DC on UA-cam.. dr Berg, that high cortisol, from stress causes liver malfunction... therefore causing severe Wright & hair loss... not completely healed yet, but on the path... I am a member of your program, and am open and willing to heal ALL mind, body & spirit... thank you for this video...
    Hope this comment helps others

  • @francesbernard2445
    @francesbernard2445 Рік тому

    I agree that I must be realistic by most of all living only one day at a time. While grieving my losses with help from my higher power instead of looping back and forth from feeling heart broken and devastated to being in denial again. Whereupon I could be more vulnerable to be falling into the same old thing all over again with another narcissist who is only offering flattery and lies to me again. Instead I will believe that I do not have to become an altogether different person while I am doing the hard work of healing well starting with for example doing only my own prescribed physical exercises at first after I was in a roll over car accident at age 66 only 6 months before having to move and on top of it a few months after that then the COVID-19 pandemic got declared right after I had to move across town too. When following the advice of my family doctor only who already gets me well enough to tell me the truths I deserve to know. Like according to him how I am being lied to. Maybe daily. Like how I and others were being told that getting vaccines for COVID-19 is taking my life into my own hands. Happy to say I was right away onto the original set of liars whoever they were while they were warning so many people to not to get vaccinated that some of them were contacting me out of the blue to warn me in turn too. Thus my lung health is now better than it was just before I ended up in that roll over car accident while for a change caring for myself at home. So thanks for the chance to meet someone new while doing so and good luck encouraging people to heal only ever from within without first at least taking down an adequate medical history.

  • @paulzedx636ninja7
    @paulzedx636ninja7 2 роки тому +12

    This is super especially since these trauma's seem to bounce around inside like a pinball machine. 😁

    • @ninalove3584
      @ninalove3584 2 роки тому +2

      You described it right. Like a pinball machine. I can't get my co parent words out of my head hence i hate talking to him. He just has a way of hurting me

    • @paulzedx636ninja7
      @paulzedx636ninja7 2 роки тому +1

      @@ninalove3584 Since narc's aren't wired the same as everyone else it's hard to understand why they focus on conflict. I can watch a thousand videos and still not understand how they get off on hurting others. ☺️

  • @jamiebeverly6087
    @jamiebeverly6087 2 роки тому +7

    Unfortunately I can’t escape , I have to communicate with him and his mother as we have children together. They use the children to get to me. I cant stop.

    • @Qhht.Illinois
      @Qhht.Illinois 2 роки тому +7

      Ok honey, first off I was in your shoes. As was many of us that broke free. I'm not judging you by any means!! I knew at my engagement photos it was not right. Literally!!! Had two beautiful children so for that I'm blessed. Stayed for 15 years of marriage, 20 years together total. No matter what you think you can't get through, you will!!! No matter how hard you think he's going to push back(and he will) if you go through divorce, it's going to one day be ok. I'm not 💯 ok. I'm a work in progress EVERYDAY!!! But getting out of ABUSE and letting you're children see the other side is PROBABLY THE BEST THING I EVER DID!!!!
      They now see strong, resilient, not crazy mom, loving and being there WITHOUT the insanity and chaos they create. Trust me it took me until my children were 14 and 11!!! Too long in my opinion looking back. And I'm sorry my husband's mother was why he was the way he was and wish them both well, but my God!!!! I'm so happy WITHOUT that BULLSHIT!!! You just have to believe, have blind faith, the universe has your back once you make the commitment to YOURSELF!!!!!!!🙏❤️😘

    • @emmad.176
      @emmad.176 2 роки тому +6

      @@Qhht.Illinois That's very sweet you have compassion for your ex and his mom and wish them well. It seems that so many narcissistic males have a covert abusive mother standing behind them and it is sad but makes me angry sometimes and like I want to fight her for it :p 😡 I'm still working toward forgiveness and letting go of the obsessive thoughts and admire peoples' surviver and thriver stories. Take care. x

    • @Qhht.Illinois
      @Qhht.Illinois 2 роки тому +3

      @@emmad.176 you'll get there! You'll realize there's no room for resentment or anger when we are here to spread the love.... To all. Even the ones who might not deserve it. At their soul, they do. 💗🙏

    • @ninalove3584
      @ninalove3584 2 роки тому +3

      Same for me, we have 2 kids. I am the primary parent while he is enjoying his new life with that woman who broke our marriage. Ever since we lived separately, he is hardly 'present' in the kids lives. Somehow he always find faults in me and that triggers my anxiety to the roof with his horrible words (via phone texts!) and it keeps repeating in my head the whole day like a broken record. I think i got some kind of ptsd from this ex.

    • @melliecrann-gaoth4789
      @melliecrann-gaoth4789 2 роки тому +2

      @@Qhht.Illinois thank you , this is so helpful 🙏

  • @cajuncrackerranch7990
    @cajuncrackerranch7990 2 роки тому +1

    Thank you 🙏.

  • @getrudemwaura946
    @getrudemwaura946 3 місяці тому

    Thank You ❤🙏🙏🙏💕💕💕

  • @NB0301
    @NB0301 2 роки тому +4

    So just to get clear does the trauma in our body represent and show up as the abuse or unhealthy experiences in our lives?

  • @jamesreed3843
    @jamesreed3843 2 роки тому +5

    I need your help

  • @agapuzio3056
    @agapuzio3056 2 роки тому

    Thank you

  • @camarorules1
    @camarorules1 Рік тому

    Left narc I was married to and my daughter picked up where he left off. She damaged my bond with my grandkids. And now she is thinking she can just come back into my life...how do you deal with this???
    Sick of all of it!!!!

  • @clairehobbs5725
    @clairehobbs5725 Рік тому +1

    Thanku xxxxxxx

  • @aussiemeditation28268
    @aussiemeditation28268 Рік тому +1

    🌳🌸🌳🌷🏵️☀️🏵️🌷🌳🌸🌳
    “Troche Trochilinae
    Avis. Violet. Genius. Klaís.
    Vibrant. Plumage. Agile. Physique.
    Songbird Humming.
    Troche Kinematics
    Ultra. Rapid. Lively. Splendor.
    Unique. Playful. Healing. Duty.
    Songbird Hovering.
    Troche R.Penstemon
    Purple. Pristine. Lilac. Flowers.
    April. Fragrance. Honey. Nectar.
    Flowers Blooming.”

  • @danshaw3239
    @danshaw3239 10 місяців тому

    💎

  • @marieestelle709
    @marieestelle709 Рік тому +1

    I stop replaying trauma

  • @scherazadesafi7906
    @scherazadesafi7906 2 роки тому +1

    Mother is the narcissist and goldenchild has become a narcissist too,both are joined by golden child's 3times divorced narcissist husband,its best to be gone from the 3 evils

  • @Itsmissnicoleanderson
    @Itsmissnicoleanderson Рік тому

    I can accept it , he’s holding me in a marriage longer everyone supports him say it’s just a piece of paper it’s not I am still losing my income .... I play it over and over again had me in salons took everything from me my barren years etc this is a lot then the woman they have do the most it’s too much

  • @KatieDMellott
    @KatieDMellott Рік тому

    What does “under the chin” mean?

    • @audbod4140
      @audbod4140 Місяць тому

      Not in the mind, in the body