There was a UA-cam post of yours semi recently about the Stanley parable ,and one of the top comments was "I can't wait for a all achievements glitchless speedrun for this game."
@@DaveyGunface So did you too see it after you started working on he video? I actually just found the post Edit: I hope this question didn't inspire the conspiracy theory below I asked again to make sure anyone reading this wouldn't get any crazy ideas, but seemingly the opposite happened.
I saw it after the video idea was set in stone, essentially. I saw the achievements, knew I wanted to make a video like this and he managed to guess right
@@user-nu4eo6xl3g dude calm down I am the one who made that comment It is still there I was hiding the fact i made the comment for a bit i wanted to do
@@miltoska9708 Well you got me there I suppose. Yeah I'm not insecure enough to delete a comment because an idea is the same, who woulda thunk that 2 people can have the same idea. Crazy.
You can still save 23 hours. -Do the speedrun as shown above, but with a laptoo, and in an island in the pacific ocean that is near the day-change line. After 4 years and 364 days, go to japan, or just cross the day-change line.
Tonga is +13, baker island is -12. you can save 25 hours total with this strategy. maybe 26 if these places have daylight savings that happen at different times and you time it out perfectly. (no idea tbh)
@@kasuraga leap years are inevitable in the run, without this strat you gain a day ontop of your five years. With the strat you already cut out many hours which cancels out the waiting time of a leap day so it’s back to a regular five year waiting time
And now Ultra Deluxe is out, and it has "Super Go Outside" where you don't play for 10 years. And when we all thought it couldn't get even less interactive!
What’s interesting about this speed run is that the beginning time is the most important. If you want the world record, but your beginning time gets beat two years in, then you would have to reset your two year speed run. This would cause you to spend 7 years getting a record. This also might be the only speed run where dying is an obstacle
Technically dying is an obstacle in any speed run as you can die at any time including partway through. It’s just a greater consideration in this speed run.
@@xkewl19 You’re right, because their speed run wouldn’t count for 2 extra years. However, you would only be able to hold the record for two years, which would cause a fork in the road. Do I accept the record for two years, or do I get a better time, extending the run by two years, with the possibility of that time getting beaten?
You probably can save some time by starting the game at 23:59:59 on a monday and skip the part where you close the game and reopen it, because you will get that achievement once you reopen the game 5 years later to get the last achievement.
_”I don’t know if it was too little or too many 8’s but I don’t fucking care.”_ Love this part lmao The dedication of never playing this game for the achievement is amazing lol, hopefully I’ll find this 5-10 years later and go _“lol i bet he got the achievement”_ Amazing video!! :D
This was a special episode in which Mitten Squad voiced Davey's video. He doesn't sound as dead as he usually does, I cannot belive that this is Davey.
imagine if you were to start this speed run now and in five years when Davey posts his speed run you just post yours ruining the last 5 years of his life and yours.
@@phaeste Actually, this isn't true. If you're like me, you already can get the 5 year achievement now, so I could do a 24 hour run right now, and get all of the achievements in one day. I would have the achievement for 5 years ahead of him.
I just realized that you could theoretically save one hour from this speedrun if you happen to live in a time zone that observes Daylight Savings Time, and start the run after Welcome Back on a Tuesday when Daylight Savings Time comes into effect, and the exact time at which the clocks jump forward is _not_ midnight Your computer will automatically switch to DST at the exact hour it's supposed to come into effect, so you're not manipulating the date and time yourself, and it would technically be legal; yet, the run would be only 23 hours, give or take a few seconds, on a perfect run because the timer itself isn't dependent on DST This, of course, assumes the game's logic for this achievement is "Is it 12:00:00AM on a Tuesday? Okay, then is it now 12:00:00AM on a Wednesday?"; rather than "Is it 12:00:00AM on a Tuesday? Okay, then start a timer from 24:00:00 and unlock the achievement when it reaches 00:00:00"
You can shave off one full day by waiting for the turn of the century… usually, any span of 5 years will include at least one leap year, but, little known fact, years that are multiples of 100 and not 400 do not have an extra day. So the soonest someone will be able to use this strat is March 1st, 2096, because there will be no February 29th in the next 5 years after that date.
holy shit and that would be a garaunteed world record too!!!! im pretty sure they voted not to do the dst bullshit anymore, so now is the last time that they are changing time making it impossible to get a better reccord unless you manage to shave 1hour off somehow...
It's funny, I got the "Go Outside" achievement legitimately, and then a few months later came across a speedrun where the guy got all the achievements and just reset his computer clock for it. I felt kind of silly, but also proud that I'd done it legit. And now there's a speedrun category where you _have_ to do it legit. I love that so much.
I might be stupid, but isn't it a time save to not restart the game before tuesday to get the welcome home achievement, and instead getting it when you boot the game 5 years later?
So realistically you could shave down the time to exactly 5 years and 1 day. That means accounting for as few leap years as possible in between that time is a legitamate speedrun strat.
Depending on how the go outside achievement is coded, someone could theoretically beat your time around the year 2100, as we skip leap days when ever the century is divisible by 100, but not 400. Meaning the Go Outside achievement could be done in one less day.
i'm still currently trying to get the 5 years achievement. on my last two months at the moment, as i last played the game on a new year's eve 4 years ago. edit: i got it 👍
Debatably, I don't think any person would speedrun all of the achievements in "one sitting", and if they did they probably didn't record it. Hypothetically there could be a dude whos' actually years into making this video and refuses to upload until he gets the record, but honestly if somebodies already on that track I'll be super late so uh, I dunno.
@@DaveyGunface Didn't you speedrun all of the achievements in "one sitting", minus the 5 year achievement? If so, anyone who bought the game when it came out could easily do this.
since time goes by faster if you're moving fast, that means that if someone were to become an astronaut in the next few days and convince a space organization to send them to mercury, whose orbital speed is about 1.5x faster than earth's, they could bring a pc along and boot up stanley parable, and they would finish the achievement slightly faster than 5 earth years
I think it might have been 5 years since I last played this game and it was in a different system. If I can get the impossible achievement I could boot up the game now and do all the other achievements and just retroactively add 5 years to my speedrun and hold the record for the next 5 years.
You can definitely get the unachievable achievement without editing the game files since I have it and I never edited the game files. Looked it up and apparently every time people figured it out the dev would change the method but stopped because people were just reverse engineering the game
Reminds me of Analogue: A Hate Story, which has an a couple achievements that you could only get by essentially asking the developer for them (I'm simplifying quite a bit)
Is exploiting the theory of special relativity considered cheating? Assuming the timer as a separate unit to the computer, if it is accelerated to a high enough velocity, it’s perceived time should speed up. If we were to send the timer into orbit where it would be going ~28,000km/h , it would save 0.000038 seconds a day or 0.06935 seconds in 5 years. You would of course have to have perfected the run to where this tiny time save is worth it, and of course have good luck with weather, and a fortune to send something to space. But god damnit, a time save is a time save!
The only thing that relativistic speeds would change is how long it takes for you, the one moving at near light speed, to have 5 years pass for your PC left nearly stationary on earth. The five years will still have to elapse regardless of how fast the PC itself moves, what changes is how much time elapses for an outside observer.
@@polocatfan No clue. The only reason I can think of is because it's incredibly difficult to demonstrate that it's a bit flip. A lot of bit flips can look like extremely rare glitches. And banning those outside of glitchless speedruns is a gray area that nobody wants to deal with.
Where exactly do you live? I live in the middle of bumblefuck nowhere but I drive all over the state fairly often. Actually going to Wichita ~next week to go to the Zoo with a cool person
Gotcha, yeah I live roughly ~100 or so miles away from Wichita, but honestly the one redeeming quality about Kansas is it's super relaxing to drive in. Everything is so flat I just turn on a podcast and shut my brain off and it's something I try to justify doing a lot. Usually people are like "aww you don't have to drive here:(((", but god damn it I WANT TO.
I enjoy speed running my favorite game series Dishonored- It usually takes me more than 20 hours every normal play through so getting it done in around and hour or two, my usual for the speedruns, feels very rewarding
I’ve actually been going for the 5 year achievement for about a year after I realized I hadn’t played it since 2016, and I’m going to get it this month, November 28. I didn’t record it, so I won’t get a record, but I can’t wait until I can finally be probably one of the first to get all the achievements organically.
On the door 430 achievement you can shave off more time if you head to the doors as soon as he starts the dialogue rather than wait for him to say the door number as long as you remember the order or if it's random generated memorize the lines for each door.
It literally doesn't matter how fast he does anything before the end of tuesday (other than the moment where tuesday starts) because he has to wait 24 hours ingame anyway.
Time dilation is actually a proven aspect of the theory of relativity. If you go up into space, your stopwatch and the stopwatch of one on the ground are desynced by a noticeable margin. Although, because we can't go into near light speed, any difference in time we can achieve from time dilation would be extremely minor. That and I imagine that staying up in space would get pretty boring.
I've got a challenge for you! Finish Dishonored* (the first game) interacting with as few people as possible. No kills, no knockouts, no sleep darts, and no powers. I did this using Blink, but haven't finished my run with no powers yet. Super fun, super challenging!
Oh shit you're right. Don't think it was today but he definitely did get that, which is cool because I really like this sponsor and I've always really liked Jesse lol.
"...because Kansas tap water tastes more like chemicals and less like water." As lifelong Kansan, can confirm. Brita filters are a bare minimum to make that shit drinkable.
i loved this video its like one of those really long runs you see where the runners have sleep breaks and stuff, but instead this one has an entire 5 years of life before finishing the run. a 5 year break.
Your statement that you would have the #1 spot for 2 weeks is actually incorrect. If a player already played Stanley Parable 5+ years ago, they could just do a run this Tuesday, get all the achievements in a single session, and have the #1 spot 5 years before you.
That requires them to have started the speedrun five years ago. You cannot just start speedrunning a game using a pre-existing save and just eyeball when you started the savefile.
Seeing other comments is making me want to come up with the ultimate strategy to create the best time. You can not cheat but I think travelling across time zones is a valid reason to change your clock which shouldn't be considered cheating. - start after february 29th 2096 and before march 1st 2099. march 6th 2096 is the first tuesday this is possible. - you can start playing in either a couple uninhabited American island in UTC-12, or if that is too difficult, you can play in American Samoa in UTC-11 though that is suboptimal and will cost you an hour. - complete the midnight monday to midnight tuesday speedrun as shown in video, though with the optimization of getting the "welcome back" achievement when you get the "go outside" achievement instead of at the beginning saving a little bit of time. - 2100 is not a leap year which is why you must start between 2096 and 2099 as this will save a full 24hrs - in preparation for 5 years of waiting ending, you should travel to the pacific nation of Kiribati which in UTC+14 which save 26hrs if you started in UTC-12 - finally open the game once your system clock reads exactly 5 years after you closed the game, plus maybe a second as you almost certainly will not have a second shot at this in your lifetime so don't ruin it. Whoever completes all of that the fastest before february 29th 2104 will have the record and it will stand until there is another chance to break the record in 2196.
Two things: 1. If you skip setting the configuration file, you get another shot at the end of the run, but be very careful then because the strat might have chnaged. 2. You can skip the exit and restart the game step at the beginning; it actually isnʼt necessary for the run. That can save you a few seconds, as thereʼs another chance to get it at the end of the run.
You fool On July 6th 2023, my copy of the Stanley parable, which has been dormant for 4 years, will be ready I have every 8/10 achievements, and on that date I will be granted the "Go Outside" achievement However, July 6th 2023 is also a Tuesday, and if I simply launch the game at the precise instant that the clock changes, down to the the exact tick on my computer, I will both get the achievement and be ready to play into getting Commitment Your time may be 14 hours faster than mine, but it will be years before you can truly dethrone me (/j)
Since it's a 5 year pause playing around daylights savings time and moving across the international date line would let you save exactly 24 hours off of your time
I like your content, looks like you take a lot of inspiration from the mitten squad, with the voice and way of talking. I like it, keep up the good worj
Mr Gunface your sponsor time with gamer supps made me the big negative dopamine because all the tiddy cups are always sold out and you just reminded me of that
i would consider achieving "unachievable" as cheating, since you could do the same thing for all of the other achievements. it should just be a 9-achievement run
I love that one of the company's tips for not getting fired is literally just "Don't get fired". Who exactly does Stanley work for? Aperture Science? It would certainly explain the omni-present Narrator.
Go outside is probably my favorite achievement on my steam account and I was very excited when I recently got it after scrolling through my games and saw (last played X X 2016)
I remember letting my PC run for 24 hours for the commitment achievement. I also did the Go outside achievement totally legitimately. Definitely didn’t do all achievements as quickly as you did tho.
There was a UA-cam post of yours semi recently about the Stanley parable ,and one of the top comments was "I can't wait for a all achievements glitchless speedrun for this game."
Honestly the dude perfectly predicted the video before it even came out, so I didn't really know what to say :P
@@DaveyGunface So did you too see it after you started working on he video?
I actually just found the post
Edit: I hope this question didn't inspire the conspiracy theory below
I asked again to make sure anyone reading this wouldn't get any crazy ideas, but seemingly the opposite happened.
I saw it after the video idea was set in stone, essentially. I saw the achievements, knew I wanted to make a video like this and he managed to guess right
@@user-nu4eo6xl3g dude calm down
I am the one who made that comment
It is still there
I was hiding the fact i made the comment for a bit i wanted to do
@@miltoska9708 Well you got me there I suppose. Yeah I'm not insecure enough to delete a comment because an idea is the same, who woulda thunk that 2 people can have the same idea. Crazy.
Optimal strat would be to run this around 2100 as there's isn't a leap day for 8 years instead of the normal 4
Damn a 24 hour save.
Use DPRK an Gregorian calendar when tourist in DPRK
Is there many speedrun strats that save more then 24hrs? This might be one of the biggest time saves in history
@@Michaelonyoutub Some Trackmania cuts save more than that afaik
@@black_m1n825 more than 24 hours? God damn
You can still save 23 hours.
-Do the speedrun as shown above, but with a laptoo, and in an island in the pacific ocean that is near the day-change line.
After 4 years and 364 days, go to japan, or just cross the day-change line.
Damn and I thought single player games couldn’t be pay to win
@@D.b._Lord mobile games
Tonga is +13, baker island is -12. you can save 25 hours total with this strategy. maybe 26 if these places have daylight savings that happen at different times and you time it out perfectly. (no idea tbh)
leap day though will add back an extra 24 hours though
@@kasuraga leap years are inevitable in the run, without this strat you gain a day ontop of your five years. With the strat you already cut out many hours which cancels out the waiting time of a leap day so it’s back to a regular five year waiting time
And now Ultra Deluxe is out, and it has "Super Go Outside" where you don't play for 10 years.
And when we all thought it couldn't get even less interactive!
So basically I have 5 years to sneak in to your house and boot up The Stanley Parable to delay the achievement for the glory to be mine?
You are a genius, hurry and steal this victory.
Wait dude wait for 4 years
Do it right before the 5th year!
I'd classify that as cheating
You can deinstall the game to reset the 5 years progress
What’s interesting about this speed run is that the beginning time is the most important. If you want the world record, but your beginning time gets beat two years in, then you would have to reset your two year speed run. This would cause you to spend 7 years getting a record. This also might be the only speed run where dying is an obstacle
It’s not an obstacle if someone uses your hand postmortem to open the game.
@@LordDaret A shared speed run I love it
Technically dying is an obstacle in any speed run as you can die at any time including partway through. It’s just a greater consideration in this speed run.
Sounds like that means you get a WR for 2 years
@@xkewl19 You’re right, because their speed run wouldn’t count for 2 extra years. However, you would only be able to hold the record for two years, which would cause a fork in the road. Do I accept the record for two years, or do I get a better time, extending the run by two years, with the possibility of that time getting beaten?
The sheer amount of spite I felt from that ending was great. "Sure you have the strat before I have completed. Good luck beating me to it."
This idiot forgot about the time machine users. Not cheating if you time machine with the camera *;)*
10:25
E
You probably can save some time by starting the game at 23:59:59 on a monday and skip the part where you close the game and reopen it, because you will get that achievement once you reopen the game 5 years later to get the last achievement.
I was thinking that you'd get Welcome Back by default.
_”I don’t know if it was too little or too many 8’s but I don’t fucking care.”_ Love this part lmao
The dedication of never playing this game for the achievement is amazing lol, hopefully I’ll find this 5-10 years later and go _“lol i bet he got the achievement”_
Amazing video!! :D
sup checkmark
Wait another popular yt
E
why do I see you *everywhere* currently?
This was a special episode in which Mitten Squad voiced Davey's video.
He doesn't sound as dead as he usually does, I cannot belive that this is Davey.
it really does sound like mitten squad, i thought that too
@@blindsloth364 no it doesnt
@@TheDsRequiem it really does.
Funny that a lot of his videos are “can you beat” videos too 😂
you could theoretically save time by implementing the 5 year wait to when you close the game for the "Welcome back!" achievement
imagine if you were to start this speed run now and in five years when Davey posts his speed run you just post yours ruining the last 5 years of his life and yours.
Nah he still has 2 weeks of that sweet first place at least
I'm pretty sure I haven't played it for at least three years...
@@Orange_Tree_ Yeah but you gotta record yourself doing all the other achievements then wait 5 years from that point. otherwise its invalid
@@phaeste Actually, this isn't true. If you're like me, you already can get the 5 year achievement now, so I could do a 24 hour run right now, and get all of the achievements in one day. I would have the achievement for 5 years ahead of him.
@@advice-13 Oh god I would cry
Oh shit, now I actually can't stop thinking about speedrunners in the distant future using relativistic speeds to complete games faster
I just realized that you could theoretically save one hour from this speedrun if you happen to live in a time zone that observes Daylight Savings Time, and start the run after Welcome Back on a Tuesday when Daylight Savings Time comes into effect, and the exact time at which the clocks jump forward is _not_ midnight
Your computer will automatically switch to DST at the exact hour it's supposed to come into effect, so you're not manipulating the date and time yourself, and it would technically be legal; yet, the run would be only 23 hours, give or take a few seconds, on a perfect run because the timer itself isn't dependent on DST
This, of course, assumes the game's logic for this achievement is "Is it 12:00:00AM on a Tuesday? Okay, then is it now 12:00:00AM on a Wednesday?"; rather than "Is it 12:00:00AM on a Tuesday? Okay, then start a timer from 24:00:00 and unlock the achievement when it reaches 00:00:00"
You can shave off one full day by waiting for the turn of the century… usually, any span of 5 years will include at least one leap year, but, little known fact, years that are multiples of 100 and not 400 do not have an extra day. So the soonest someone will be able to use this strat is March 1st, 2096, because there will be no February 29th in the next 5 years after that date.
@@SpencerTwiddy or just do it on Haumea.
Would changing the time before, but not during, the speedrun be legal?
holy shit and that would be a garaunteed world record too!!!! im pretty sure they voted not to do the dst bullshit anymore, so now is the last time that they are changing time making it impossible to get a better reccord unless you manage to shave 1hour off somehow...
@@SpencerTwiddy lezgooo just gotta wait 75 years to use this strat, thank you kind stranger
It's funny, I got the "Go Outside" achievement legitimately, and then a few months later came across a speedrun where the guy got all the achievements and just reset his computer clock for it. I felt kind of silly, but also proud that I'd done it legit.
And now there's a speedrun category where you _have_ to do it legit. I love that so much.
this fucking guy. what a legend you can have the world record in my heart
its the fantom porces guy
pf guy
Bro i love your content
E
I might be stupid, but isn't it a time save to not restart the game before tuesday to get the welcome home achievement, and instead getting it when you boot the game 5 years later?
Let’s be real here, he ain’t gunna open the game exactly 5 years later so it doesn’t rest matter
Yeah, it would be, but he wants to get every achievement before the Go Outside for the UA-cam video.
HOLY SHIT THE STRATS
So realistically you could shave down the time to exactly 5 years and 1 day. That means accounting for as few leap years as possible in between that time is a legitamate speedrun strat.
Depending on how the go outside achievement is coded, someone could theoretically beat your time around the year 2100, as we skip leap days when ever the century is divisible by 100, but not 400. Meaning the Go Outside achievement could be done in one less day.
But is that a Tuesday?
@@misirtere9836 just start the run on a Tuesday in between March 2096 and February 2099, meaning none of the five years will have a leap day
I love how the end just becomes like a villain monologue
Yea it was honestly pretty terrifying when he talked about the cups
i'm still currently trying to get the 5 years achievement.
on my last two months at the moment, as i last played the game on a new year's eve 4 years ago.
edit: i got it 👍
Tell me how that goes upload it on your channel I’m subbing to you
Good luck, play it safe and wait an entire week after whatever date you think is the 5 year line. You do NOT want to mess that up
Did you get the achievement?
@@ajaxandachilles7431 yea you can see my latest vid
I don’t know what happened to the “Go Outside” achievement, but there is now “Super go outside”, which takes 10 years instead of 5. Good luck.
Go Outside is still valid, Super Go Outside is in the new game, and that will be achieved soon(TM)
Stanley Parable Glitchless All Achievement Speedrunners be like: damnit that's a 5 year time loss
Imagine opening the game at 4.9 years instead of 5. Devastating.
Perfect time, I needed something to watch mid dish washing
Accurate
*stops the video in five years*
Mood
what if you owned the game before? couldnt you theoretically get 24 hours
Debatably, I don't think any person would speedrun all of the achievements in "one sitting", and if they did they probably didn't record it. Hypothetically there could be a dude whos' actually years into making this video and refuses to upload until he gets the record, but honestly if somebodies already on that track I'll be super late so uh, I dunno.
@@DaveyGunface Didn't you speedrun all of the achievements in "one sitting", minus the 5 year achievement? If so, anyone who bought the game when it came out could easily do this.
@@advice-13 I have all achievements. Even the 5 years achievement. I didnt got them all in one sitting though.
@@davekachel obviously, you can't sit down for 5 years straight
@@BetaMaster2 Only until one maniac does it
can't wait for people to make new "top ten slowest speedruns" videos in 2026.
Yeah, tell storster, the creator of "The longest speedruns ever"
since time goes by faster if you're moving fast, that means that if someone were to become an astronaut in the next few days and convince a space organization to send them to mercury, whose orbital speed is about 1.5x faster than earth's, they could bring a pc along and boot up stanley parable, and they would finish the achievement slightly faster than 5 earth years
"Stanly Paradox"
Me who was heard of the wait 3 years achievement: Wait a minute.
I think it might have been 5 years since I last played this game and it was in a different system. If I can get the impossible achievement I could boot up the game now and do all the other achievements and just retroactively add 5 years to my speedrun and hold the record for the next 5 years.
Do it my guy do it
Go for it you mad man.
Speedruns should start on a fresh save, like any other game speedrun.
Let us know what happens
We might be watching history unfold here
You can definitely get the unachievable achievement without editing the game files since I have it and I never edited the game files.
Looked it up and apparently every time people figured it out the dev would change the method but stopped because people were just reverse engineering the game
Reminds me of Analogue: A Hate Story, which has an a couple achievements that you could only get by essentially asking the developer for them (I'm simplifying quite a bit)
Dang, this run has more idle time than twilight princess low percent.
Imagine he forgets the day and plays Stanly parable at 4 years and 364 days
Is exploiting the theory of special relativity considered cheating? Assuming the timer as a separate unit to the computer, if it is accelerated to a high enough velocity, it’s perceived time should speed up. If we were to send the timer into orbit where it would be going ~28,000km/h , it would save 0.000038 seconds a day or 0.06935 seconds in 5 years. You would of course have to have perfected the run to where this tiny time save is worth it, and of course have good luck with weather, and a fortune to send something to space. But god damnit, a time save is a time save!
Honestly, you're better off hoping for a bit flip to change your pc clock just so you get the achievement early.
I think speed runs have to include local time, so if your clock speeds up or slows down the time doesn't change
The only thing that relativistic speeds would change is how long it takes for you, the one moving at near light speed, to have 5 years pass for your PC left nearly stationary on earth. The five years will still have to elapse regardless of how fast the PC itself moves, what changes is how much time elapses for an outside observer.
@@polocatfan No clue. The only reason I can think of is because it's incredibly difficult to demonstrate that it's a bit flip. A lot of bit flips can look like extremely rare glitches. And banning those outside of glitchless speedruns is a gray area that nobody wants to deal with.
hey Davey, I love your content. the fact that we live in the same state, so I can run into you potentially in public (if I ever went out) is wacky
That implies he goes out also
Where exactly do you live? I live in the middle of bumblefuck nowhere but I drive all over the state fairly often. Actually going to Wichita ~next week to go to the Zoo with a cool person
@@DaveyGunface I live in downtown Wichita not too far from the keeper of the plains bridge
Gotcha, yeah I live roughly ~100 or so miles away from Wichita, but honestly the one redeeming quality about Kansas is it's super relaxing to drive in. Everything is so flat I just turn on a podcast and shut my brain off and it's something I try to justify doing a lot. Usually people are like "aww you don't have to drive here:(((", but god damn it I WANT TO.
@@DaveyGunface fair, but it's like the total opposite driving at night, I always feel like something is following me
I enjoy speed running my favorite game series Dishonored- It usually takes me more than 20 hours every normal play through so getting it done in around and hour or two, my usual for the speedruns, feels very rewarding
I’ve actually been going for the 5 year achievement for about a year after I realized I hadn’t played it since 2016, and I’m going to get it this month, November 28. I didn’t record it, so I won’t get a record, but I can’t wait until I can finally be probably one of the first to get all the achievements organically.
Remember folks, sponsorships have to be approved by the company before you are allowed include them in a video.
GSups are some cool dudes.
I didn't think he would include the RussianBadger flavor lol
This is hands down the best speedrun video I have ever seen. Nothing I see anymore will top this. Dream has nightmares of Davey Gunface.
imagine not playing the stanley parable for 5 years true torture you do alot for us davey!
To beat this, you have to find the console command to unlock the "go outside" achievement, keybind it to c and press it after x.
You actually made me watch the entire sponsor segment ... voluntarily!
The only channel that achieved that are the Map Men.
Good job!
Even though this is horribly unoptimized, i still love it
Imagine waiting 5 years to get that last achievement only to log in and realise you only waited 4 years and 11 months
joke is on you: there are 27 time zones so people in oceania will complain why this video got posted on their monday/wednesday
On the door 430 achievement you can shave off more time if you head to the doors as soon as he starts the dialogue rather than wait for him to say the door number as long as you remember the order or if it's random generated memorize the lines for each door.
It literally doesn't matter how fast he does anything before the end of tuesday (other than the moment where tuesday starts) because he has to wait 24 hours ingame anyway.
Time dilation is actually a proven aspect of the theory of relativity. If you go up into space, your stopwatch and the stopwatch of one on the ground are desynced by a noticeable margin.
Although, because we can't go into near light speed, any difference in time we can achieve from time dilation would be extremely minor.
That and I imagine that staying up in space would get pretty boring.
That outro was for some reason more motivational then any speeches, thank ya. For some sorry reason, I really needed to hear that.
Remind me when its been 5 years, thanks!
I've got a challenge for you! Finish Dishonored* (the first game) interacting with as few people as possible. No kills, no knockouts, no sleep darts, and no powers.
I did this using Blink, but haven't finished my run with no powers yet. Super fun, super challenging!
It's funny you post a video with THIS exact sponsor when Jesse Cox tweeted about their stuff earlier today. XD
Oh shit you're right. Don't think it was today but he definitely did get that, which is cool because I really like this sponsor and I've always really liked Jesse lol.
"...because Kansas tap water tastes more like chemicals and less like water."
As lifelong Kansan, can confirm. Brita filters are a bare minimum to make that shit drinkable.
Glad to see a UA-camr in 2021 who actually remembers Stanley Parable exists. I’m still waiting for Ultra Deluxe. 😔
i loved this video
its like one of those really long runs you see where the runners have sleep breaks and stuff, but instead this one has an entire 5 years of life before finishing the run. a 5 year break.
Your statement that you would have the #1 spot for 2 weeks is actually incorrect. If a player already played Stanley Parable 5+ years ago, they could just do a run this Tuesday, get all the achievements in a single session, and have the #1 spot 5 years before you.
That requires them to have started the speedrun five years ago. You cannot just start speedrunning a game using a pre-existing save and just eyeball when you started the savefile.
Could you imagine getting to 4 and a half years accidentally opening the game.
You could save an hour off of your time by waiting until Daylight Saving rolls over so it's a 23 hour speedrun
I’m waiting for the Stanley Parable Deluxe version. It’s gonna be twice as long and twice as better.
Can't wait for a hacker 4 years later to hack his device, then play "The stanley parable" and reset his 5 year counter.
*enters worm hole with my switch and Stanley parable and completes the record in negative 5 years*
Seeing other comments is making me want to come up with the ultimate strategy to create the best time. You can not cheat but I think travelling across time zones is a valid reason to change your clock which shouldn't be considered cheating.
- start after february 29th 2096 and before march 1st 2099. march 6th 2096 is the first tuesday this is possible.
- you can start playing in either a couple uninhabited American island in UTC-12, or if that is too difficult, you can play in American Samoa in UTC-11 though that is suboptimal and will cost you an hour.
- complete the midnight monday to midnight tuesday speedrun as shown in video, though with the optimization of getting the "welcome back" achievement when you get the "go outside" achievement instead of at the beginning saving a little bit of time.
- 2100 is not a leap year which is why you must start between 2096 and 2099 as this will save a full 24hrs
- in preparation for 5 years of waiting ending, you should travel to the pacific nation of Kiribati which in UTC+14 which save 26hrs if you started in UTC-12
- finally open the game once your system clock reads exactly 5 years after you closed the game, plus maybe a second as you almost certainly will not have a second shot at this in your lifetime so don't ruin it.
Whoever completes all of that the fastest before february 29th 2104 will have the record and it will stand until there is another chance to break the record in 2196.
That was the best sponsor section ive ever seen, imma watch that again
Two things:
1. If you skip setting the configuration file, you get another shot at the end of the run, but be very careful then because the strat might have chnaged.
2. You can skip the exit and restart the game step at the beginning; it actually isnʼt necessary for the run. That can save you a few seconds, as thereʼs another chance to get it at the end of the run.
You fool
On July 6th 2023, my copy of the Stanley parable, which has been dormant for 4 years, will be ready
I have every 8/10 achievements, and on that date I will be granted the "Go Outside" achievement
However, July 6th 2023 is also a Tuesday, and if I simply launch the game at the precise instant that the clock changes, down to the the exact tick on my computer, I will both get the achievement and be ready to play into getting Commitment
Your time may be 14 hours faster than mine, but it will be years before you can truly dethrone me
(/j)
You have to do this on a leap year for optimal time
Gordon is a trained professional. He doesn't need to listen this.
Since it's a 5 year pause playing around daylights savings time and moving across the international date line would let you save exactly 24 hours off of your time
I got my 5 year achievement a few months ago. It was amazing.
It’s already been more than 5 years since the game’s release. There’s no way someone isn’t already progressing this speedrun lmao
Someone speedrunning the ALL achievements challenge 5 years ago: Hold Me beer
So the clickless, upgradeless, itemless 1,000,000,000 cookies cookie clicker speedrun is fun
oh... oh no...
@@slurpnderp1838 basically, get good golden cookie rng
I like your content, looks like you take a lot of inspiration from the mitten squad, with the voice and way of talking. I like it, keep up the good worj
Now you can put Stanley parable Speedrun in all your twitch stream titles
Mr Gunface your sponsor time with gamer supps made me the big negative dopamine because all the tiddy cups are always sold out and you just reminded me of that
i would consider achieving "unachievable" as cheating, since you could do the same thing for all of the other achievements. it should just be a 9-achievement run
It's the same as that "glitchless" category that is full of glitches because they're too easy to accidentally do
@@NecromancyForKids i guess, but copy-pasting something in the config file isnt something you'd accidentally run into
yeah if he's gonna mess with configs and console commands, he might aswell change his pc date to skip waiting 5 years
To get an optimal time you would have do the run on a year that has year that is a multiple of 100 (but not 400) so you can skip the leap day
I knew it would be The Stanley Parable that did it. It’s such a great game!
Love the "My Innermost Apocalypse" at the end
Gosh dangit how dare you make me want to play this game again. I'm trying to get the 5 year achievement, can't wait for that deluxe edition
I love that one of the company's tips for not getting fired is literally just "Don't get fired". Who exactly does Stanley work for? Aperture Science? It would certainly explain the omni-present Narrator.
I literally have a month and 8 days until I get the "Go Outside" Achievement.
I suppose It's time to 100% the game this year.
The dedication for this entire video is unreal-
See you in 2026.
I’m fast
Also unrelated topic… is creating a cult in your server allowed
I don't see why not, I'd just like to know who this cult is dedicated to
@@DaveyGunface I hope it's to bug
@@DaveyGunface wait who are not allowed who is allowed?
@@Stopstalkingmeplease6739 Don't think I'm allowing or disallowing anything, I'd just like to know :P
@@DaveyGunface how about you?
your doing great with the speed run so far keep up the great work you can do this.
Go outside is probably my favorite achievement on my steam account and I was very excited when I recently got it after scrolling through my games and saw (last played X X 2016)
debating whether the speedrun content or the sponsor commentary was the benefit of having watched this.
both. both is good.
hey, can’t wait to have you get the speedrun wr for stanley parable 2, or at least by 2036
Im still waiting!
This channel is hilarious and silly all the time, I am kinda taken aback by the fact that this channel only has 32 thousand subscribers.
Going to graduate high school by the time you beat this
God bless your patience, Davey. You absolute madlad.
I check the channel bc I recognize the voice and go "oh it's war crimes guy"
Can't wait, counting down the days
I cannot speak, but I must scream.
that remembered me to relaunch the game to get the go outside achievement
I remember letting my PC run for 24 hours for the commitment achievement. I also did the Go outside achievement totally legitimately. Definitely didn’t do all achievements as quickly as you did tho.
MD Stanley parable ultra deluxe version you can actually get the impossible achievement normally inside the game with a machine
Well you can even make an ad entertaining and make me sit through it voluntarily. That's some skill
Doing nothing is more fun than doing something
There is actually some speedruns in which the times are excruciatingly long. Like the one where Link stares at a rupee for 17 hours.
This video reminded me that it's been long enough for me to get the "go outside" achievement and thus I can finally play this game again.
This reminds me of the longest marathon which took over 40 years to complete.