@Ifbep2165 Do I know the feeling!.. In the UK, this is a habit you will sometimes encounter, unsually among older men. Yes, come to think of it, it's a typical old fogey's thing: " Cheer up! (sometimes adding "love" or "duck") It might never happen again!" Now, thank God I didn't bump into one of those on my way out of ER where my husband had just passed away, as there would've been GBH. Some people haven't got a clue, even when - ESPECIALLY WHEN - they mean to be pleasant. And of course, all my sympathy on your sad loss. Once again... do I know the feeling.
I'm so sorry for your loss. The same thing happened to me when I was a teenager and I'd just lost my grandfather, a classmate told me "You always look so grumpy" :X
@@pascalmartin6133 « En même temps, de Sarkozy à Besancenot, le monde politique est rempli de bolchéviques, alors ça se comprend ! » Merci de démontrer exactement ce que *@patrickf428* dit ! « surtout qu'un socialiste c'est plus ce que c'était ... » Sarkozy, bolchévik... 🤦♂
Ce qui m'offense, ce sont les gens qui croient que tous les Américains ont les mêmes idées et les mêmes croyances. J'ai une bonne compréhension du socialisme et d'autres philosophies politiques et je suis Américain. Je vais bientôt en France et j'ai peur d'être traité comme un crétin.
I have a French friend born and raised in Nice who now lives here in Southern California. He said his natural inclination is to complain and he tries hard to not do that here in the US😅
Yeah it's a bit of a national sport in France, right? And even if you tone it down, if you encounter someone who is full of toxic positivity, it can be a bad match.
Je suis français; il y a maintenant quelques années, j'avais emmené à mes futurs beaux-parents espagnols une bouteille de très bon bordeaux. Mon beau frère a absolument voulu le boire mélangé avec du coca-cola; "un crime" pour moi.
Il avait envie d'un calimocho (50% vin, 50% coca), mais le calimocho ne se fait pas avec du très bon vin normalement ah ah ! Autre classique espagnol : traiter le foie gras comme du vulgaire pâté.
Re: Loud talking- I think a foreign language always sounds louder. Once in a restaurant in the USA I was surprised by a couple at a nearby table talking loudly in French. I was annoyed until I realized that they actually weren’t louder than everyone else. Their speech just stood out to me more.
what a brilliant observation, I'll def pay attention next time! I am wondering whether it is about the rhythm that stands out as it won't be merging with the native language conversations
In my experience Americans really are much louder in public places than French people. I can just about always hear my fellow Americans before anyone else.
A few years ago, I was visiting my 🇫🇷 SIL on the Provençal coast. I was walking through the Tuesday market with a British friend who lives there. I saw rows of beautiful potted chrysanthemums & said I might buy a pot of them for my SIL’s garden. He quickly talked me out of it. I had no idea what they signified in France. 🙃
I actually encountered a loud, boisterous large French group at a restaurant I was at with my mother last June. At one point either my mother or myself was startled by a loud laugh so we turned briefly to look. As the group was departing a nice woman came over to apologize for being boisterous , but my mom and I were not bothered. 😅
@@babsr8479 some people have no education rules in every countries. But, if they have, it's true that speaking or laughing in a way all the restaurant can hear you is a sign of very low standart of education here in France. It's a sign of disrecpect for people around. We usually look straight to the people who behave this way or to ask them directly to be more respectful.
Si vous allez dans un bon restaurant, je veux dire un restaurant ou le chef prépare vraiment ses plats, ne demandez pas un changement de garniture (de légumes); si les légumes ne vous plaisent pas, choisissez un autre plat. Le chef est, ou pense, ou croit être un artiste ! Vous n'oseriez pas demander à un peintre de changer les couleurs de son tableau. Ne rajoutez pas de ketchup.
Marcy, bonjour! Je n'ai jamais trouvé de problème à demander qu'un légume soit omis ou remplacé. Tout bon chef préférerait que son client apprécie le repas et reparte avec un visage heureux et en donnant une bonne critique ! Si le menu n'indique pas clairement ce que contient le plat, si le serveur ne sait pas ou ne veut pas s'informer, c'est le moment du départ. Ma grande difficulté a toujours été l'omniprésence du chocolat dans / sur les desserts. Personne ne semble comprendre que l'on puisse avoir des allergies à certains aliments et il se trouve que le chocolat est l'une des miennes, et le café l'autre. Quant à suggérer une couleur différente à un artiste, s'il s'agit d'une œuvre commandée, la personne qui a commandé le tableau a tout à fait le droit de demander la palette de couleurs (je suis artiste, soit dit en passant), mais l'artiste a le choix d'accepter ou non la commande / ou la suggestion qui a été faite. En général, si quelqu'un suggère une couleur différente, tout artiste sensé entamera une discussion pour demander pourquoi, parce que c'est peut-être exactement ce qu'il/elle avait du mal à trouver ! 😊
@@renferal5290 Oui, je ne vais pas risquer ma santé pour la fierté artistique du chef. Yeah, I’m not going to risk my health for the artistic pride of the chef.
@@KiKiQuiQuiKiKi « Yeah, I’m not going to risk my health for the artistic pride of the chef. » So chose another dish on the menu, don't make the chef change the dish just for you.
Well at least some of them certainly do care, not the case for most French people, only interested in their own little navel ( and yes I m French, to my utter despair)
I never realized that anyone may offer mums as a gift until my neighbor offered me 2 potted bouquets of them last September for my porch. My boyfriend was quite happy with them but I was looking at them in disbelief. I explained that to me they are flowers for the dead, which surprised her and my boyfriend. We laughed about it and I kept them on the porch but they gave me the creeps all season long.
It seems that here in the U.S. only yellow mums are a sign of sorrow. All other colors symbolise happiness. and friendship. Somehow I do not think that the Emperors of Japan only think of their dead predecessors when they sit on the Chrysanthemum Throne
I got used to French habits so much that, as an American living in France, if tourists talk to me directly in English without asking if I understand or speak English, I feel offended (again, even though I am a US citizen). Let's say that 50% of the time, my first response will be "Yes, I do speak Englsih, thanks for asking". It is rude of me, I know....... but it is to balance how rude they were in not making any effort at all in the first place. I get that French people would feel annoyed and/or insulted by such an attitude
I'd be more bothered by the lack of greeting than the language, especially if the person doesn't sound like a native English speaker. Starting with "hello" or "excuse-me" at least shows the person did some research on French social norms, even if they don't speak the language.
In fact, I have never seen anyone bring chrysanthemums except to a funeral. Here in Germany, they are also considered flowers of mourning and death. Not a nice gift! Hmm, most of the things you mentioned I would take for granted...
I was so worried that my schoolboy French wouldn't be good enough in Paris, but the Parisians could not have been nicer. They really seemed to appreciate that I'd made an effort, and slowed down their French when they replied to me. And after the first day, I was AMAZED at how much French I managed to drag back up from the 1970s. I had no idea I'd retained it! 😀 Anyone else from the UK remember this? "Voici la famille Bertillon. Papa, Mama, et les trois enfants, Philippe, Marie-Claude et Alain."
When I lived in San Diego, I was in my car, stopped at a red light when a guy on the street selling newspapers came to my window and told me to smile. I immediately got irritated because 1. I was smiling and 2. Who approaches a stranger and tells them to smile? So many things can be going on in anyone's life.
One non-French thing I experienced here was when I ordered an ice cream from a place in my neighborhood & the vendor told me I should smile. I replied with the truth: My husband had died a few days earlier & I didn't feel like smiling. He immediately apologized & has been very nice ever since that day.
I really wonder how people can say such stupid things. You are "allowed" to be sad, or in a bad mood and do not owe anyone a smile. Sorry for your loss
I've been here over thirty years, and I know that this advice is good. Especialy the "Bonjour".. Even when entering a small shop, say "bonjour" when you are through the door. You'll come a cros as someone worthy of attention.
I was in a restaurant in Normandy. I ordered coffee and then I asked for a little milk. The waiter shrugged and let out a deep breath to show displeasure. I found out I was supposed to order „cafe au lait“. I just let it pass but thought , what’s the big deal?
He had to come back because you didn't ask for coffee AND milk but coffee (means black coffee without milk). It isn't the same. If you only order coffee, you'll have a black coffee.
The smile thing...lol. When I was younger, I actually used to smile more. But stopped because men would come up to me and ask if I was smiling at them and/or tell me I have a pretty smile and try to start a conversation. Fast forward to me starting my current job.... A co-worker, whenever he'd walk by me, would say, "you're not smiling" or "you should be smiling." I told him, as politely as possible, that it was annoying. "Well, I only do it because you have a nice smile." Which really pissed me off. If I tell you I don't like something you're doing to me, I don't want to hear excuses. Stop doing it. Did he stop. For one day. I then told him not to speak to me unless it was work related. When he'd try to slip other b.s in there, I'd ignore him. Problem solved.
In English, 'French' is an adjective/qualifier, never a noun. you are a French *person*; not 'a French'. Also, the word 'aloud' means expressed rather than kept to oneself. The term you wanted was 'loudly'. That said, feel free to write in French here. If someone wants to translate your words, that service is provided directly under the comment :) Edit: added punctuation
As always, I love your videos, as a French I fully agree with those points, all true, and all very valid things to know about french people and understanding why many people have bad experiences. The only thing personally I wouldn't care about or wouldn't even notice is the flower thing, but yeah a safe bet is always to bring wine, flowers is more a romantic thing so could be misinterpreted
Francophile American here. I can't imagine doing any of those things EXCEPT I didn't know the Chrysanthemum rule. Thanks for that! For sure, Americans are too loud on average. In my 67 years on earth, most of it in the US, I don't think anybody has ever come up to me out of the blue and told me to smile. Do people actually do that?
When I’ve been in France I’ve always said “Bonjour, je ne parle pas beaucoup français. Est-ce que vous parlez anglais?” (Hello, I don’t speak much French. Do you speak English?) Obviously, that’s more of an intermediate level understanding of French, but it has helped things get off on the right foot.
@@SCGMLB Hi, if you want to improve it a little bit you could say "je ne parle pas **très bien** Français" instead of "beaucoup" /I don't speak French **very well**/. It REALLY sounds better ! Don't hesitate to ask me anything ;)
@@ResisterExister French people like to use “ understatements”, especially in a negative form, what we call “ litote”. You can say “ je ne parle pas bien français”, but “ je ne parle pas très bien français” is a little bit better (it is not a litote, I don’t mean it is much better)…
@ Mon idée c'est de minimiser "l'espace cognitif" nécessaire pour un seul "acte de communication" et d'user de "l'espace économisé" pour diversifier les situations dans un apprentissage débutant d'une langue commune étrangère. Je ne sais pas si je suis clair, mais c'est comme ça que je le vois.
What took me aback in the US, more than mums, is the wreaths on people's doors around the holidays. To me, as a French person, a wreath belongs on a coffin.
I’ve seen your videos on French etiquette for dining. And videos from others as well. However they’ve always focused on the more formal rules of either dining out or as a guest at a dinner party. I’d love to see the less formal customs, if there are any, for picnics and such.
All they say about this (dressing code, places at the table, ...) only concern "la vieille France" (the old France), not modern people. (it's not about age)
@@methodeetrigueur1164 picnics aren’t normally at such places especially. They’re normally alone with family or friends along a an outdoor space such as a park or woodland, etc. But I get what you’re saying; it was the same in Italy.
@ I was talking about the restaurants. Since picnics tend to take place during outdoor activities or while traveling, the appropriate attire is that for these activities. The main thing is to know if the place is authorized for picnics.
@ thanks. I was actually wondering how much the etiquette changed though. For us picnic food is more likely finger food. Sandwiches, fried or BBQ chicken, BBQ ribs, chips and dip, etc.
A friend talked about going to Paris with his parents when he was a teenager. If he tried to use what high school French he had mixed with English, Everyone claimed to have no idea what he was trying to say/ask and wouldn't help him. However, when he was with his parents and used what French he had mixed with Spanish, people bent over backwards to help him. I'm old enough to remember when Americans did dress up to go to good restaurants - I miss those days.
I think it's ok to tell a baby or a very young child to smile. It's cute and everyone loves to see babies smile. But attempting to compel an older person to smile is an affront. It's basically saying, "Your body, my choice." I've frequently experienced people questioning and confronting me for crossing my arms. I do this if I'm thinking deeply about something, if I'm cold or even for no particular reason at all. It's very annoying to be called out publicly with comments about my body. Obviously, all of this is much worse for women.
pretty accurate and fun to watch as a french person ! you number one is a MUST DO absolutly ! and yes no personnal talk no money talk (no one speaks about how much they earn in france !)
Great information as always, thank you so very much for sharing your experiences and good tips. Hope all is well. Looking forward to seeing your next video 🎉
I’m an American and have lived in France for over 20 years now. I live in the sticks, a super rural area, so not near any fancy cities like Paris or Lyon. Well, something that struck me right away was that the French people in this area speak really loud. 😂 Most Americans have what we think of as an indoor voice and an outdoor voice. You can speak loudly when you're out working in your yard, or playing sports, or things like that, but if you're in your house or in a restaurant or a cafe, you speak softly so you don’t disturb the people around you. Well, that’s not how it works where I live in France. Many people speak as if they are talking to someone on the other side of a field! And it also seems that when French people are with friends they don’t like for there to be silences. There has to be a conversation. A trip to the supermarket is often a social event, with people stopping in the aisles chatting. You actually have to politely ask them if you can get past them, since they are blocking the whole aisle. I often see groups of bike riders go past my house and they’re yelling to each other constantly, carrying on friendly conversations even though they’re riding bikes on a main street.
@21ruevictorhugo perhaps it's also personality. When I was in school in France, the chef was very loud, but his wife was extremely soft spoken. Among the students, some were loud...especially boys....but again I think this was related to personality. I worked in a hospital in the South of France...personnel could be loud, but they could also be in your face and aggressive in there opinions. This could be cultural...related to a city or region in any country.
Some French people do the same in the USA. They walk up to people and start speaking French. I have a French accent and French demeanor, I guess they figure out quickly that I speak the language. I am always approached by the Frenchmen directly in French.
C'est vrai que quelqu'un me dise de sourire alors que j'en ai pas envie ça a le don de m'énerver. J'ai eu cette remarque il y a 33 ans quand j'ai travaillé sur le chantier d'Eurodisneyland (qui est devenu le Parc Eurodisney près de Paris). J'étais dans une période où j'étais triste et inquiète parce que ma famille avait des difficultés financières pour payer notre loyer et en plus ma mère avait un cancer (elle en est d'ailleurs morte en février 1992); Donc j'étais pas d'humeur joyeuse mais ça ne m'empêchais pas de faire mon travail correctement (j'étais secrétaire pour un staff moitié américain, moitié français), et régulièrement j'avais la remarque sur le ton de la plaisanterie d'un ingénieur "souris, tu es chez Disney". Qu'est-ce que ça m'énervais vue ma situation familiale. Evidemment personne ne connaissait ma situation de soutien financier pour ma famille et ma détresse morale pour ma mère sans compter un autre drame encore récent pour nous. Bref...grand moment de solitude car comme vous l'avez si bien fait remarqué, nous n'étalons pas notre vie privée aux inconnus, même aux collègues de travail à moins d'être très intimes.
@@catfrexfrecat1800 Venant du Sud de la France, c'est la première fois que je l’entends celle-là. Personne ici n’oserai dire de sourire à quelqu'un qu'il ou elle ne connaît pas.
@@RazS730 c'était dans le cadre du travail et c'est vrai que quand je suis concentrée sur mon travail, je ne suis pas particulièrement souriante (comme la plupart des autres d'ailleurs). C'était dit sur le ton de la blague, mais il l'a répété plusieurs fois au long des 2 ans où j'ai travaillé là-bas. Je saurais jamais s'il était sérieux ou s'il plaisantait et moi qui d'habitude ai de la répartie, j'avais pas envie de me justifier, ça n'en valait pas le coup.
I am an American & I HATE it when people tell me to smile. I don't walk around with a grimace on my face. I had a coworker tell me to do so because "it's part of my job". When I go to Europe, people come up to me & speak English all the time. I don't look like an American either. I guess they do it to the first person that they see.
9:10 - When I was in Paris for six months IT consulting sting I took hundreds if not thousands photographs (granted, most of them of architecture and such). Still, many did feature people, even in cafes or restaurants, and I never asked for permission by anything more than an eye contact and smile. In all this time I got a negative reaction, and pretty loud one, exactly _once._ Frankly, I expected more. (This goes with my experience that Parisians _will_ do their best to accommodate my lack of French; I encountered only _two_ people who insisted on communicating only in French.)
As a Frenchman (act. French-Belgian) what I really cannot stand is people who show off, especially when it comes to money. If people across the table are poorer that's very disrespectful towards them. If people across the table are as rich or richer that's ridiculous. In both cases bragging is vulgar anyway. Regarding the chrysanthemums... I buy them in the fall as an ornament to my own garden (but never the brownish, "cemetery brown", colors). But they are definitely not flowers to use as a gift as they are the traditional flowers for funerals; some people might really be offended.
I worry about our trip to France next year. My wife has always been a loud talker. Now that I have become hard of hearing, I appreciate it. If someone speaks to me quietly I won’t understand them.
Hi Michael, don't worry. If you need someone to speak up because you're hard of hearing, they'll happily oblige. This point was more about people in social situations who are oblivious to their volume level and disturbing those around them. Just the fact that you're aware that your wife tends to be a loud talker and the French tend to be a little quieter puts you leaps and bounds above most people so I'm sure it'll be fine. Have a great trip!
Don’t worry. The French expect Americans to be loud and will just throw their eyes up to heaven and say to themselves ‘typical Americans’. You’ll be doing the French a favour as they love to feel they’re superior and can bitch a little about you in French to each other.😂😂😂😂 I used to say this to my French friends and they end up laughing to each other as a result as they know it’s true.
11:04 To elaborate on the point of personal questions : it's perfectly normal in France to ask about the occupation of someone you just met. That's one of the first question that comes up in small talk : "Qu'est ce que vous faites dans la vie ?" ("What do you do in life?" = "what's your occupation?"). However, a litteral translation of "what do you do for a living" might sound strange to a Frenchman, because they don't like to be reminded they have a job "to earn a living". A job is thought to be more about social position than money. That's why "how much money do you make" is a very sensitive topic which is not commonly shared among friends or even relatives.
Today I'm in France on the 1st of 14 days on a location scouting trip in advance of moving over end of May! I pushed myself to speak my horrible A1/2 French everywhere today, and everyone was delightful and so helpful. And it's fun to see French UA-cam ads versus US ones. I am totally going to change my VPN address when I get back home to the states to one in France.
I don't understand why your advices are specifically for the French. It's just a way to have good interactions with every human being all around the world.
This video is spot on. Worst you can do in France is to combine number 1,2 and 4 lol. Go to a restaurant in sneakers or leggings and criticise the food out loud. Do this and you’re guaranteed to have your visa cancelled. Number 6 is so true as well. No kidding: do this and most people will refuse to help you or talk to you even if they’re perfectly fluent in English
I was told to smile by a 40 something Frenchman in a loud voice in Cêret a few years ago. He was one of those guys standing around outside a café. I was 70 and admit I wear my worry on my face. Although I felt offended, it did make me think about how I present myself unconsciously can make a difference. Thanks as always, Diane.
So helpful! Thank you. Some things seem obvious to me - I’m older so learned more conservative ways of behaving. The discussion of chrysanthemums was interesting because it is the same in Asia! Being told to smile is irritating anywhere for me. I’ve been studying French like crazy!
My Father’s family is French Canadian, originally from Normandy. I definitely agree with yes, many Americans tend to be very loud, and it’s a poor representation for many Americans who are not loud, like myself. I’m quiet, but it’s how one is raised, perhaps? 🤷🏻♀️
I usually found it best to try the local language as for as I was able. No matter what country. That said, I’ve also met people who were offended if I began the conversation in their language when I wasn’t capable enough.
It's generally a good idea to try to speak the local language, even if there are mistakes or errors. You've made the effort to try, and people are taking a rather positive view of it.
Years ago, while traveling with a NJ college group to Paris, I sat at the restaurant counter awaiting my friends so that we could tour the area. A French gent sat next to me and began speaking in French to me (sounding like DO YOU WANT TO as an English translation), I tried to answer in my fractured French. He stood up and said, in English, I THOUGHT YOU WERE FRENCH. I said THANK YOU FOR THE COMPLIMENT and he went away. I said aloud WELL, THERE GOES MY PICKUP. :) Funny but true.
@@MsBackstager Love this! 😆 Everyone speaks to me in French first, switching only after I ask( in French) if they speak English. I too find that a compliment. Flying home from France, a lady at the airport in the US welcomed me to the country saying enjoy your visit here (I was actually in my home state). 😁
Thanks. Basically, just act politely and respectfuly. Like, just behave like a civilized human being ! I ve met many tourists in Paris, mostly wanting me to take a picture of them in front of the Eiffel tower or Notre-Dame. They always have asked nicely, and it's always a pleasure to do it ! Just be nice, give a smile and a "bonjour", and all will be well ! Welcome to France, we're happy to have You all here !
French here, I've lived in the countryside and in cities: 1. It's totally true, criticising someone's cooking is really very disrespectful, even if the food is disgusting. We can give advice, but it can be complicated because, as we all know, French is arogant. 2. It really depends on the location. If it's a fast food place (kebab, tacos, etc), you could arrive in your pants and nobody would be surprised lol. In a brasserie-type restaurant, you need to be fairly ‘normal’ (a pullover, jeans). And then in more gastronomic restaurants, yes, you have to be very well dressed, but most French people don't even go there. Just dress reasonably and you'll be fine. 3. True, even if we don't really know flowers, it's better to choose others. And yes, it's a little tradition we're losing touch with, but when we're invited we give flowers. But I have the impression that we do it less and less. 4. It depends. Depending on the location, it may be acceptable. We can have big mouths. And even in some restaurants it's going to be pretty noisy. In the street and in public places, though, yes, you should try to be quiet, even if many people don't understand it (and many French people don't). 5. Some people may say to smile, but it's more the family and for photos. And yeah if I don't want to smile, I won't and shut up. 6. Absolutely true. The English and the French have quite a tumultuous history and I think that's where it comes from. So starting with a bit of very simple French is quite useful for breaking the ice. Like, ‘Oh bonjour, s'il vous play can I ask you how to go to this place?’ .Many people will find it difficult to speak in English, but if you are polite enough to start in French, the person you are speaking to will agree to help you as best they can (except in Paris, perhaps lol). 7. In reality, most of the time people don't give a damn. You just need to avoid taking photos of one or more people in particular. Karen are everywhere. 8. Yeah, don't show your money without modesty. In France, it's very difficult to find out how much a colleague earns, so it's a bit of a taboo. 9. Is there a nine? 10. It's kind of hard. Small talk is boring af, but precise question on your life is weird. I can't help on this, I'm not really good at it x). I hope it helps
1) I'm pretty sure that insult someone or someone's work is offending all around the world. 2) It depend on the restaurant. If you go for a fastfood, nobody will care about your outfit, if you go to a 5 star, wearing a suits or a dress would be the least. And between those two extremes, only the context will say if it's appropriate or not. (Sport wear for a date isn't a good idea, for example). I'm pretty sure it's the same in the USA, or all around the world, too. And for the gym's clothes, it's a question of hygiene. Keep your sweaty clothes in a bag and wash them. 3) That's totally right, chrisanthemes are meant to ornate tombs. The worst would be to offer them to someone hospitalised. 4) It's a good advice for everyone everywhere, keep your voice low in public places. People around don't want to hear you chatting, they don't care, and maybe they want to talk to someone else too and don't want to be disturbed. 5) Yes, when you have a bad day, you don't want that someone told you what to do, and particularly to "smile". That's offending, but I don't think it's only french who think like that. There are way to say it cheerfully, and it may enlight a bit a bad day, but it's tricky. 6) Pretty good advice, here. 7) It's not offendig, it's illegal, and it's the same in many country. The law is more complex than that, but just don't do it, it will avoid troubles. 8) It's not really about beeing rich, it's beeing showy that can offend. It's a question of context, with your friends, there will be a lot of competition and banters, and showing off is natural, but it's a childish demeanor. Showing off front a total stranger can be really offending. 9) French tend to be more discreet than americans, you can have small talk, but don't be too personnal, or it could be taken as an attempt of flirting. Sorry for the weired laguage and the typos, I'm self learner.
@OuiInFrance I’m fairly new to your channel and I enjoy your content. One thing that the commenters may not realize is that the US is probably 4 or 5 times the size of France. Within the US people on the west coast are different from people on the east coast and people in the south are different than people from the Midwest. Just about everything you said also applies in the US. Except chrysanthemums, first of all why would anyone bring that flower to anyone’s house regardless of its significance. But that rule applies in the US with roses. You’d never bring someone besides your partner a bouquet of red roses. Also the same with traditional Lillies …that’s a funeral flower. Follow this simple rule when traveling especially internationally, you’re a guest in their country act accordingly! I liked the bonjour tip. My question is when you walk into a shop and/or restaurant are you supposed to say it as you enter ? I used to live in Japan and when you enter an establishment everyone usually says…”Irasshaimase” which means welcome. My local French bakery the (French) woman always says “Bonjour” when you enter the store while she’s helping others…so are you supposed to reply back. My initial thought is for one you’d have to yell it (as she does) and for me say it loudly back is interrupting…so what’s proper French etiquette for that scenario? Thank you again for your content and as a side note…when you revealed what happened to you in that shop, my heart broke for you…I’d say his shop and blast him…but perhaps that’s the American in me 🤣👏
Also as a footnote…Americans at least most of them follow the unwritten rule of not speaking about politics and/or religion (unless you’re speaking with friends) I think where the notion of Americans talk about money or possessions comes from when you meet someone, unfortunately a lot of people feel the need to size you up and they do that by asking personal questions…I agree it’s rude and tacky. They’re asking you this to determine how they are going to speak to you….IMO that has more to do with class determination.
Hi, welcome! Thanks for being here! To answer your q about bonjour, I cover that in the linked video I mentioned about the importance of bonjour. But yes, when you walk into a small shop, the polite thing to do is to say bonjour to the shopkeeper (any person you encounter). You don't need to yell it across a supermarket to someone 30 meters away, but if you enter a small shop and there's an employee, yes say and definitely reply w/it if someone says it to you (no need to yell or say it loudly though in a busy bakery, just a normal bonjour). Hope that helps!
On my first visit to Paris about 50 years ago, it was very memorable to see every metro station and train car plastered with the "Ne se cracher pas" message!
Hi Diane. Another informative yet essential article on how to act properly no matter where you are. I don’t like loud or pushy people who dominate the conversation or expect you to know what they are talking about. Obnoxious behavior is bad behavior no matter where you are. And it’s not just tourists from the US who do this. I’ve experienced it with local folks speaking French while talking on the phone etc on the buses or metros in Paris as well as in the province even to the extent that the bus driver had to ask them to stop. I simply can’t imagine asking someone how much money they make anywhere. It’s ignorant behavior. As to smiling all the time it’s insulting to think that one is entitled to a smile from a stranger. However, I have found that when I visit the same cafe or boulangerie several times, by the second or third time the bartender will recognize me and have my café and calvados ready for me always offering me a bonjour and cordial service. I never forget that as a child, someone gave me a Tee shirt that said Smile god loves you. I have never forgotten that insult. I too am a serious person who can get lost in my own thoughts and that’s ok. But on a positive note, there is a poster of a beautiful Bald Eagle’s face and head with the caption that said, “I am smiling “. A bientôt Joseph and Gigi.
And yet, I've cooked (delicious) entrées at French homes and nice people felt free to shrug and say things like, "Not bad" or, the "cabbage was a little undercooked " in a dish. Why not the reverse sensitivity? ☺
This is even truer if you come to Quebec, half of those we hate about the french also. *and for the half that don't concern French people is talking to us in english, most people outside of Montreal will frown about this (personnally as a bilingual who speak a bit of a few other language it's arabic that annoyed me the most lol) so "Bonjour" and "Parlez-vous anglais" is a most here too
It's true that we are shocked by people talking loud. Americans are especially known for this. I remember an american man talking loud about a painting in a museum, I found it very bad manners.
This seems like common sense to me. I am going to Paris in July. Will be my third visit. My French is limited to 3 or 4 words yet, since I make an effort, the French have always been kind to me. I also wear more appropriate clothes to blend in.. When I was in Rome last year, someone just started speaking to me in Italian. I must have blended in pretty well 🤣
I'm laughing because I was in France last month and had a woman come up to me and start asking me for directions (in French) with no greeting. I gave her directions to city center but remember being a little surprised that she didn't start her inquiry with a "bonjour". And I'm fairly certain she was French from her accent.
🤔Si vous êtes américains ou anglais c'est plutôt vous qui avez un accent . Autrement les français de chaques régions de France ont des accents différents .
Je suis un Francais de 45 ans. Petite rectification : vous pouvez aller dans n’importe quel restaurant habillé en jogging/basket. Mais en général, dans les grands restaurants chic et avec étoiles il est conseillé d’être bien habillé.
@@ResisterExister A chacun son truc. A chacun son style, alors. J'ai mon propre style. Quand je sors en public et surtout quand je voyage je préfere être habillé comme il faut! Je parle d'une une élégance discrète, vêtements de qualité en noir et blanc.
I'm french and I'm not that easily offended, but I'm cringing at each point you evocate... for me it's a no go for each one of them. I must add: in France, it is totally forbidden to film / take picture of people without *written* consent. This law is called "Droit à l'Image". Being in a public space do not allow you to take a picture of someone, contrary to the USA, and you can be sued if you do.
Hello, I come from the perspective of my lived experience so I always specify France but the things I talk about definitely aren't exclusive to France by any means! When I've said "Europe" before, people will complain and say "Europe is a continent and diverse" so I try not to generalize to the whole continent and stick w/what I know to be true. Hope that makes sense! :-)
@@ResisterExister Not sure what you mean. In many videos I'll explain something about how it is in France and state "and many other countries in Europe." Nothing is a problem, just different cultures.
Día de Muertos offends the French. 🙄🇫🇷 THEY insult mexican food and say “berk” making faces and twisting their noses. Waiters are very rude. And I say this after living 10 years in Paris.
Now I know why I could never really fit in even despite the fact that I was born and raised there. Smile. My RBF (resting bitch face) scared my uncle on facetime the other day because I was listening to him without a facial expression. Some French ppl like to see a smile on a face I guess. Food. Yes, they’re very touchy about it but if you can’t say anything nice about it just don’t say anything and smile. Loud. Hell yes!! Working in tourism, we used to say that the Germans were the Americans of Europe. I live in the US and it’s even worse here. It only takes 1 or 2 to speak loudly for the entire room to raise the db level. F’ing loud-ass people! Personal questions. In 20 years living in the US I’ve never heard anyone asking how much anyone else makes. I might not be in the “right” socioeconomic bracket for that but this is either a myth or regional. In France people don’t talk about that because most make jack and don’t mingle with the wealthier ones. French have a love-hate relationship with money which comes from the catholic heritage of the country.
Bonjour d'Occitanie (France) Pour la tenue au restaurant on fait attention, c'est vrai. Pour le choix des aliments il y a une tolérance avec les étrangers, même si cela ne nous fait pas plaisir. Mais entre régions nous pouvons avoir des désaccords gustatifs. On n'offre pas de chrysanthèmes en général, c'est une fleur qui est réservé au cimetière, puisque c'est la seule fleur qui est proposé pendant cette période, mais si la personne chez qui vous allez aime la fleur pourquoi pas. Parler fort, il y a une tolérance lié au condition de la conversation, je dirais que nous n'aimons pas être indiscrêt. Pour faire une demande, il y a le bonjour et le s'il vous plait qui est très apprécié en France. C'est vrai que beaucoup de Français n'aimes pas les personnes aux revenues plus important qu'eux, moi je dit que c'est de la jalousie.
Everything you say applies just about everywhere in the world except in America, like say bonjour, Goodday! Hola// I like the smile story, if somebody ask me to smile when i am not in the mood to smile I 'll tell them to f.... off. It never happens in France because nobody is in a jolly mood anyhow....🤣
Remember they are ( mostly) Latin people, so the males speak loud, same thing in Spain, Italy, Portugal, and Latin America. Machismo is not dead in Latin societies.
Bvaro! Bien vu. Your point number 6 is especially good. Try French at first, at least a few words and most of us will answer in English. But don't start in English because it gives us the feeling that we are being taken for granted. Like everyone else, we hate that.
As a French I can absolutely confirm what Diane said. 1 Exception though : construction workers and all stupid entitled men do ask women and especially younger ones to smile on the street, which is insanely sexist. Patriarchy doesn’t have borders…
@@methodeetrigueur1164 Parce que sa peut en être. Pourquoi dire seulement aux femmes de sourire exactement ? Et même sans ça c'est déplacé. La personne est peut être triste, passe une mauvaise journée, période etc ou n'a juste pas envie. On ne dit pas aux gens ce qu'ils doivent faire ou l'expression qu'ils doivent avoir.
@@methodeetrigueur1164 Parce que sa peut en être. Pourquoi dire seulement aux femmes de sourire exactement ? Et même sans ça c'est déplacé. La personne est peut être triste, passe une mauvaise journée, période etc ou n'a juste pas envie. On ne dit pas aux gens ce qu'ils doivent faire ou l'expression qu'ils doivent avoir.
You should explain that there income taxes and wealth taxes in France. The State taxes wealth. So people don’t talk about their wealth for fear that the tax man will learn about it.
je me souviens que Chirac qui parlait à tony Blaire de la cuisine anglaise ( on dit que la cuisine anglaise c'est de la merde mais quand on en mange on est deçu que s'en est pas )
dix sur dix =) Thus, getting chrysanthèmes would be more awkward than annoying in my case, as you said we are nuanced people ^^' Another one I find annoying as a Frnech, is how some people you just met directly call you by a nickname (Tom in my case) like and get very informal right away. Even in profesionnal context!
Yah the nickname thing is a big difference. My husband has always been Tom to me (and my family and friends in the US) but here, everyone at work and even his parents call him Thomas (Toe-mah).
Bonjour, Diane! Love your channel and have been subscribed for a few years now. One question... Can you recommend any online French instructional websites?
Bonjour! Thank you! If you want to learn on your own (no live teachers), I recommend Lingopie which is kind of like Netflix for language learning, so if you're into TV/movies, that might worth a shot. It's linked in the description where it says "learn French the fun way." I've also done Lingoda in the past which is live video call classes with native speaker instructors. Just depends what kind of instruction you're looking for!
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@@OuiInFrance C'est déjà génial d'entrée de jeu de se faire traiter de "locals"... pourquoi pas "natives" pendant que vous y êtes ?
No 5 Smiling - my husband recently died and someone (a stranger) told me to smile!!!!!!! You never know what’s going on in someone’s life.
My deep feelings! I share your feelings that it can be offensive to force others to smile not even knowing the reason for other's sadness.
@Ifbep2165
Do I know the feeling!.. In the UK, this is a habit you will sometimes encounter, unsually among older men. Yes, come to think of it, it's a typical old fogey's thing: " Cheer up! (sometimes adding "love" or "duck") It might never happen again!" Now, thank God I didn't bump into one of those on my way out of ER where my husband had just passed away, as there would've been GBH. Some people haven't got a clue, even when - ESPECIALLY WHEN - they mean to be pleasant.
And of course, all my sympathy on your sad loss. Once again... do I know the feeling.
I'm so sorry for your loss. ;-((((((((((( Hang in there.
@@OuiInFrance Thank you Diane.💌
I'm so sorry for your loss.
The same thing happened to me when I was a teenager and I'd just lost my grandfather, a classmate told me "You always look so grumpy" :X
ce qui m'offense c'est d'etre traité de "socialiste" par des americains qui ne savent manifestement pas ce que ça veut dire
surtout qu'un socialiste c'est plus ce que c'était ...
En même temps, de Sarkozy à Besancenot, le monde politique est rempli de bolchéviques, alors ça se comprend !
La politique Américaine n'est pas visé sur la vérité; mais plutôt sur la peur.
@@pascalmartin6133
« En même temps, de Sarkozy à Besancenot, le monde politique est rempli de bolchéviques, alors ça se comprend ! »
Merci de démontrer exactement ce que *@patrickf428* dit ! « surtout qu'un socialiste c'est plus ce que c'était ... »
Sarkozy, bolchévik... 🤦♂
Ce qui m'offense, ce sont les gens qui croient que tous les Américains ont les mêmes idées et les mêmes croyances. J'ai une bonne compréhension du socialisme et d'autres philosophies politiques et je suis Américain. Je vais bientôt en France et j'ai peur d'être traité comme un crétin.
I have a French friend born and raised in Nice who now lives here in Southern California. He said his natural inclination is to complain and he tries hard to not do that here in the US😅
I've been there myself. One way to make this work is to still complain but make sure to offer a solution i.e. being constructive.
That's very hard for us!
Yeah it's a bit of a national sport in France, right? And even if you tone it down, if you encounter someone who is full of toxic positivity, it can be a bad match.
I like that!
He is wrong. The USA is the best place to complain. Here you are heard. Unless he wants to complain about silly things.
Je suis français; il y a maintenant quelques années, j'avais emmené à mes futurs beaux-parents espagnols une bouteille de très bon bordeaux. Mon beau frère a absolument voulu le boire mélangé avec du coca-cola; "un crime" pour moi.
Oh là là là là 😢
Quoi? Pas vrai.
Non!
Divorce... Une telle belle famille est inacceptable 🤣😂🤣
Il avait envie d'un calimocho (50% vin, 50% coca), mais le calimocho ne se fait pas avec du très bon vin normalement ah ah ! Autre classique espagnol : traiter le foie gras comme du vulgaire pâté.
Re: Loud talking- I think a foreign language always sounds louder. Once in a restaurant in the USA I was surprised by a couple at a nearby table talking loudly in French. I was annoyed until I realized that they actually weren’t louder than everyone else. Their speech just stood out to me more.
That's an interesting point. Our ears certainly do perk up when something sounds different!
what a brilliant observation, I'll def pay attention next time!
I am wondering whether it is about the rhythm that stands out as it won't be merging with the native language conversations
In my experience Americans really are much louder in public places than French people. I can just about always hear my fellow Americans before anyone else.
A few years ago, I was visiting my 🇫🇷 SIL on the Provençal coast. I was walking through the Tuesday market with a British friend who lives there. I saw rows of beautiful potted chrysanthemums & said I might buy a pot of them for my SIL’s garden. He quickly talked me out of it. I had no idea what they signified in France. 🙃
I can see people buying one for their MIL, though. Of course, the subtext would be obvious. :D
I actually encountered a loud, boisterous large French group at a restaurant I was at with my mother last June. At one point either my mother or myself was startled by a loud laugh so we turned briefly to look. As the group was departing a nice woman came over to apologize for being boisterous , but my mom and I were not bothered. 😅
@@babsr8479 we also have loudy people here, for sure. We call them beauf, it's really a mark of being uneducated as in Manu countries i guess 😉
@@babsr8479 some people have no education rules in every countries. But, if they have, it's true that speaking or laughing in a way all the restaurant can hear you is a sign of very low standart of education here in France. It's a sign of disrecpect for people around. We usually look straight to the people who behave this way or to ask them directly to be more respectful.
@Christinebord It didn't bother me. I was just surprised that they were boisterous the way they claim Americans are.
Maybe they just tried to adopt local manners (no need to answer, it's a joke)😋 @@babsr8479
@@babsr8479 not all americans act the same way. I have very respectful and polite american friends.
Si vous allez dans un bon restaurant, je veux dire un restaurant ou le chef prépare vraiment ses plats, ne demandez pas un changement de garniture (de légumes); si les légumes ne vous plaisent pas, choisissez un autre plat. Le chef est, ou pense, ou croit être un artiste !
Vous n'oseriez pas demander à un peintre de changer les couleurs de son tableau.
Ne rajoutez pas de ketchup.
Marcy, bonjour! Je n'ai jamais trouvé de problème à demander qu'un légume soit omis ou remplacé. Tout bon chef préférerait que son client apprécie le repas et reparte avec un visage heureux et en donnant une bonne critique ! Si le menu n'indique pas clairement ce que contient le plat, si le serveur ne sait pas ou ne veut pas s'informer, c'est le moment du départ.
Ma grande difficulté a toujours été l'omniprésence du chocolat dans / sur les desserts. Personne ne semble comprendre que l'on puisse avoir des allergies à certains aliments et il se trouve que le chocolat est l'une des miennes, et le café l'autre.
Quant à suggérer une couleur différente à un artiste, s'il s'agit d'une œuvre commandée, la personne qui a commandé le tableau a tout à fait le droit de demander la palette de couleurs (je suis artiste, soit dit en passant), mais l'artiste a le choix d'accepter ou non la commande / ou la suggestion qui a été faite.
En général, si quelqu'un suggère une couleur différente, tout artiste sensé entamera une discussion pour demander pourquoi, parce que c'est peut-être exactement ce qu'il/elle avait du mal à trouver !
😊
je suis entièrement d'accord
@@renferal5290 Oui, je ne vais pas risquer ma santé pour la fierté artistique du chef.
Yeah, I’m not going to risk my health for the artistic pride of the chef.
@ My French is not good so I never go to the restaurants. I'm lucky I can order a Coffee
@@KiKiQuiQuiKiKi
« Yeah, I’m not going to risk my health for the artistic pride of the chef. »
So chose another dish on the menu, don't make the chef change the dish just for you.
I feel as though I am reincarnated French because I absolutely detest how a lot of Americans do barge in with personal questions! 😆
@@nikkid7631 what nationality are you?
Well at least some of them certainly do care, not the case for most French people, only interested in their own little navel ( and yes I m French, to my utter despair)
The peoples of all European countries do not like personal questions, not just the French.
😂😂
@@nikkid7631 so never go to Uk, it's a national sport!
I never realized that anyone may offer mums as a gift until my neighbor offered me 2 potted bouquets of them last September for my porch. My boyfriend was quite happy with them but I was looking at them in disbelief. I explained that to me they are flowers for the dead, which surprised her and my boyfriend. We laughed about it and I kept them on the porch but they gave me the creeps all season long.
They are considered the flower of mourning in many countries.
It seems that here in the U.S. only yellow mums are a sign of sorrow. All other colors symbolise happiness. and friendship. Somehow I do not think that the Emperors of Japan only think of their dead predecessors when they sit on the Chrysanthemum Throne
I got used to French habits so much that, as an American living in France, if tourists talk to me directly in English without asking if I understand or speak English, I feel offended (again, even though I am a US citizen). Let's say that 50% of the time, my first response will be "Yes, I do speak Englsih, thanks for asking". It is rude of me, I know....... but it is to balance how rude they were in not making any effort at all in the first place. I get that French people would feel annoyed and/or insulted by such an attitude
You’re 100% right to act that way.
I'd be more bothered by the lack of greeting than the language, especially if the person doesn't sound like a native English speaker. Starting with "hello" or "excuse-me" at least shows the person did some research on French social norms, even if they don't speak the language.
You're not french, you don't have to be offended. Maybe "shocked" should be more reasonable.
In fact, I have never seen anyone bring chrysanthemums except to a funeral. Here in Germany, they are also considered flowers of mourning and death. Not a nice gift!
Hmm, most of the things you mentioned I would take for granted...
My sun brought me once chrysanthemum for my birthday.
He had to deal with many humorous comments about his haste to inherit.
@@pascalvaddos8641 I can understand that 😂 I wish you a long and healthy life! 💐
To be fair, most of these are faux pas in most countries.
I was so worried that my schoolboy French wouldn't be good enough in Paris, but the Parisians could not have been nicer. They really seemed to appreciate that I'd made an effort, and slowed down their French when they replied to me. And after the first day, I was AMAZED at how much French I managed to drag back up from the 1970s. I had no idea I'd retained it! 😀 Anyone else from the UK remember this?
"Voici la famille Bertillon. Papa, Mama, et les trois enfants, Philippe, Marie-Claude et Alain."
When I lived in San Diego, I was in my car, stopped at a red light when a guy on the street selling newspapers came to my window and told me to smile. I immediately got irritated because 1. I was smiling and 2. Who approaches a stranger and tells them to smile? So many things can be going on in anyone's life.
One non-French thing I experienced here was when I ordered an ice cream from a place in my neighborhood & the vendor told me I should smile. I replied with the truth: My husband had died a few days earlier & I didn't feel like smiling. He immediately apologized & has been very nice ever since that day.
I hope he learned his lesson! Ugh. Sorry about your husband. ;-(
I really wonder how people can say such stupid things. You are "allowed" to be sad, or in a bad mood and do not owe anyone a smile. Sorry for your loss
I've been here over thirty years, and I know that this advice is good. Especialy the "Bonjour".. Even when entering a small shop, say "bonjour" when you are through the door. You'll come a cros as someone worthy of attention.
I was in a restaurant in Normandy. I ordered coffee and then I asked for a little milk. The waiter shrugged and let out a deep breath to show displeasure. I found out I was supposed to order „cafe au lait“. I just let it pass but thought , what’s the big deal?
He had to come back because you didn't ask for coffee AND milk but coffee (means black coffee without milk). It isn't the same. If you only order coffee, you'll have a black coffee.
The smile thing...lol. When I was younger, I actually used to smile more. But stopped because men would come up to me and ask if I was smiling at them and/or tell me I have a pretty smile and try to start a conversation.
Fast forward to me starting my current job.... A co-worker, whenever he'd walk by me, would say, "you're not smiling" or "you should be smiling." I told him, as politely as possible, that it was annoying. "Well, I only do it because you have a nice smile." Which really pissed me off. If I tell you I don't like something you're doing to me, I don't want to hear excuses. Stop doing it. Did he stop. For one day. I then told him not to speak to me unless it was work related. When he'd try to slip other b.s in there, I'd ignore him. Problem solved.
As a French, speaking aloud and not saying "bonjour" at the start of a conversation are the biggest issues I have with US tourists.
In English, 'French' is an adjective/qualifier, never a noun. you are a French *person*; not 'a French'. Also, the word 'aloud' means expressed rather than kept to oneself. The term you wanted was 'loudly'. That said, feel free to write in French here. If someone wants to translate your words, that service is provided directly under the comment :)
Edit: added punctuation
Screw you.
As always, I love your videos, as a French I fully agree with those points, all true, and all very valid things to know about french people and understanding why many people have bad experiences. The only thing personally I wouldn't care about or wouldn't even notice is the flower thing, but yeah a safe bet is always to bring wine, flowers is more a romantic thing so could be misinterpreted
Francophile American here. I can't imagine doing any of those things EXCEPT I didn't know the Chrysanthemum rule. Thanks for that! For sure, Americans are too loud on average. In my 67 years on earth, most of it in the US, I don't think anybody has ever come up to me out of the blue and told me to smile. Do people actually do that?
When I’ve been in France I’ve always said “Bonjour, je ne parle pas beaucoup français. Est-ce que vous parlez anglais?” (Hello, I don’t speak much French. Do you speak English?)
Obviously, that’s more of an intermediate level understanding of French, but it has helped things get off on the right foot.
100%, I'm sure it was much appreciated ;-)
@@SCGMLB Hi, if you want to improve it a little bit you could say "je ne parle pas **très bien** Français" instead of "beaucoup" /I don't speak French **very well**/. It REALLY sounds better ! Don't hesitate to ask me anything ;)
@@keesrintjema1512 Je ne parle pas *bien* Français.
Shorter, simpler to remember.
@@ResisterExister
French people like to use “ understatements”, especially in a negative form, what we call “ litote”.
You can say “ je ne parle pas bien français”, but “ je ne parle pas très bien français” is a little bit better (it is not a litote, I don’t mean it is much better)…
@ Mon idée c'est de minimiser "l'espace cognitif" nécessaire pour un seul "acte de communication" et d'user de "l'espace économisé" pour diversifier les situations dans un apprentissage débutant d'une langue commune étrangère.
Je ne sais pas si je suis clair, mais c'est comme ça que je le vois.
What took me aback in the US, more than mums, is the wreaths on people's doors around the holidays. To me, as a French person, a wreath belongs on a coffin.
These days, all across Europe, if you are an American, it might help to say, "I did not vote for Trump."
I’ve seen your videos on French etiquette for dining. And videos from others as well. However they’ve always focused on the more formal rules of either dining out or as a guest at a dinner party. I’d love to see the less formal customs, if there are any, for picnics and such.
All they say about this (dressing code, places at the table, ...) only concern "la vieille France" (the old France), not modern people. (it's not about age)
It depends on the restaurant. You'll be well-dressed for a well-known restaurant, but jeans and a sweatshirt will suffice for a pizzeria.
@@methodeetrigueur1164 picnics aren’t normally at such places especially. They’re normally alone with family or friends along a an outdoor space such as a park or woodland, etc. But I get what you’re saying; it was the same in Italy.
@ I was talking about the restaurants. Since picnics tend to take place during outdoor activities or while traveling, the appropriate attire is that for these activities. The main thing is to know if the place is authorized for picnics.
@ thanks. I was actually wondering how much the etiquette changed though. For us picnic food is more likely finger food. Sandwiches, fried or BBQ chicken, BBQ ribs, chips and dip, etc.
FWIW, I've often thought Americans were loud because the cities are so loud and so many seem to need hearing aids.
A friend talked about going to Paris with his parents when he was a teenager. If he tried to use what high school French he had mixed with English, Everyone claimed to have no idea what he was trying to say/ask and wouldn't help him. However, when he was with his parents and used what French he had mixed with Spanish, people bent over backwards to help him. I'm old enough to remember when Americans did dress up to go to good restaurants - I miss those days.
Es decir, en pocas palabras: en Francia no seas mal educado y respeta a tu prójimo . Estos consejos son básicos en todo el mundo
I think it's ok to tell a baby or a very young child to smile. It's cute and everyone loves to see babies smile. But attempting to compel an older person to smile is an affront. It's basically saying, "Your body, my choice." I've frequently experienced people questioning and confronting me for crossing my arms. I do this if I'm thinking deeply about something, if I'm cold or even for no particular reason at all. It's very annoying to be called out publicly with comments about my body. Obviously, all of this is much worse for women.
pretty accurate and fun to watch as a french person ! you number one is a MUST DO absolutly ! and yes no personnal talk no money talk (no one speaks about how much they earn in france !)
One related point is when in a store or at a market, don't handle any merchandise without asking first.
Great information as always, thank you so very much for sharing your experiences and good tips. Hope all is well. Looking forward to seeing your next video 🎉
I’m an American and have lived in France for over 20 years now. I live in the sticks, a super rural area, so not near any fancy cities like Paris or Lyon. Well, something that struck me right away was that the French people in this area speak really loud. 😂 Most Americans have what we think of as an indoor voice and an outdoor voice. You can speak loudly when you're out working in your yard, or playing sports, or things like that, but if you're in your house or in a restaurant or a cafe, you speak softly so you don’t disturb the people around you. Well, that’s not how it works where I live in France. Many people speak as if they are talking to someone on the other side of a field! And it also seems that when French people are with friends they don’t like for there to be silences. There has to be a conversation. A trip to the supermarket is often a social event, with people stopping in the aisles chatting. You actually have to politely ask them if you can get past them, since they are blocking the whole aisle. I often see groups of bike riders go past my house and they’re yelling to each other constantly, carrying on friendly conversations even though they’re riding bikes on a main street.
Just a matter of education
@21ruevictorhugo perhaps it's also personality. When I was in school in France, the chef was very loud, but his wife was extremely soft spoken. Among the students, some were loud...especially boys....but again I think this was related to personality. I worked in a hospital in the South of France...personnel could be loud, but they could also be in your face and aggressive in there opinions. This could be cultural...related to a city or region in any country.
@@bobbymaccrash3635no it's cultural. I believe it was in South of France where people are very latin, loud and chatty. North is different.
Some French people do the same in the USA. They walk up to people and start speaking French.
I have a French accent and French demeanor, I guess they figure out quickly that I speak the language. I am always approached by the Frenchmen directly in French.
C'est vrai que quelqu'un me dise de sourire alors que j'en ai pas envie ça a le don de m'énerver. J'ai eu cette remarque il y a 33 ans quand j'ai travaillé sur le chantier d'Eurodisneyland (qui est devenu le Parc Eurodisney près de Paris). J'étais dans une période où j'étais triste et inquiète parce que ma famille avait des difficultés financières pour payer notre loyer et en plus ma mère avait un cancer (elle en est d'ailleurs morte en février 1992); Donc j'étais pas d'humeur joyeuse mais ça ne m'empêchais pas de faire mon travail correctement (j'étais secrétaire pour un staff moitié américain, moitié français), et régulièrement j'avais la remarque sur le ton de la plaisanterie d'un ingénieur "souris, tu es chez Disney". Qu'est-ce que ça m'énervais vue ma situation familiale. Evidemment personne ne connaissait ma situation de soutien financier pour ma famille et ma détresse morale pour ma mère sans compter un autre drame encore récent pour nous. Bref...grand moment de solitude car comme vous l'avez si bien fait remarqué, nous n'étalons pas notre vie privée aux inconnus, même aux collègues de travail à moins d'être très intimes.
@@catfrexfrecat1800 Venant du Sud de la France, c'est la première fois que je l’entends celle-là. Personne ici n’oserai dire de sourire à quelqu'un qu'il ou elle ne connaît pas.
@@RazS730 c'était dans le cadre du travail et c'est vrai que quand je suis concentrée sur mon travail, je ne suis pas particulièrement souriante (comme la plupart des autres d'ailleurs). C'était dit sur le ton de la blague, mais il l'a répété plusieurs fois au long des 2 ans où j'ai travaillé là-bas. Je saurais jamais s'il était sérieux ou s'il plaisantait et moi qui d'habitude ai de la répartie, j'avais pas envie de me justifier, ça n'en valait pas le coup.
I always thought it was the lily that was slightly inappropriate, since it's popular for funerals. My Quebecois mother disliked them for that reason.
I am an American & I HATE it when people tell me to smile. I don't walk around with a grimace on my face. I had a coworker tell me to do so because "it's part of my job". When I go to Europe, people come up to me & speak English all the time. I don't look like an American either. I guess they do it to the first person that they see.
9:10 - When I was in Paris for six months IT consulting sting I took hundreds if not thousands photographs (granted, most of them of architecture and such). Still, many did feature people, even in cafes or restaurants, and I never asked for permission by anything more than an eye contact and smile. In all this time I got a negative reaction, and pretty loud one, exactly _once._ Frankly, I expected more. (This goes with my experience that Parisians _will_ do their best to accommodate my lack of French; I encountered only _two_ people who insisted on communicating only in French.)
As a Frenchman (act. French-Belgian) what I really cannot stand is people who show off, especially when it comes to money. If people across the table are poorer that's very disrespectful towards them. If people across the table are as rich or richer that's ridiculous. In both cases bragging is vulgar anyway.
Regarding the chrysanthemums... I buy them in the fall as an ornament to my own garden (but never the brownish, "cemetery brown", colors). But they are definitely not flowers to use as a gift as they are the traditional flowers for funerals; some people might really be offended.
In France, chrysanthemums are not reserved for funerals as they are only autumn/fall plants but rather to flower the tombs on November 1st.
I worry about our trip to France next year. My wife has always been a loud talker. Now that I have become hard of hearing, I appreciate it. If someone speaks to me quietly I won’t understand them.
Hi Michael, don't worry. If you need someone to speak up because you're hard of hearing, they'll happily oblige. This point was more about people in social situations who are oblivious to their volume level and disturbing those around them. Just the fact that you're aware that your wife tends to be a loud talker and the French tend to be a little quieter puts you leaps and bounds above most people so I'm sure it'll be fine. Have a great trip!
Don’t worry. The French expect Americans to be loud and will just throw their eyes up to heaven and say to themselves ‘typical Americans’. You’ll be doing the French a favour as they love to feel they’re superior and can bitch a little about you in French to each other.😂😂😂😂 I used to say this to my French friends and they end up laughing to each other as a result as they know it’s true.
Welcome to France ! Bienvenue en France !
11:04 To elaborate on the point of personal questions : it's perfectly normal in France to ask about the occupation of someone you just met. That's one of the first question that comes up in small talk : "Qu'est ce que vous faites dans la vie ?" ("What do you do in life?" = "what's your occupation?"). However, a litteral translation of "what do you do for a living" might sound strange to a Frenchman, because they don't like to be reminded they have a job "to earn a living". A job is thought to be more about social position than money. That's why "how much money do you make" is a very sensitive topic which is not commonly shared among friends or even relatives.
Of all the similar videos, you always make the most accurate and show the most open mind and intelligent attitude .merci beaucoup
Today I'm in France on the 1st of 14 days on a location scouting trip in advance of moving over end of May! I pushed myself to speak my horrible A1/2 French everywhere today, and everyone was delightful and so helpful. And it's fun to see French UA-cam ads versus US ones. I am totally going to change my VPN address when I get back home to the states to one in France.
I think that you can replace “in France” with “almost anywhere outside the USA”.
Very true.
I don't understand why your advices are specifically for the French. It's just a way to have good interactions with every human being all around the world.
This video is spot on.
Worst you can do in France is to combine number 1,2 and 4 lol.
Go to a restaurant in sneakers or leggings and criticise the food out loud. Do this and you’re guaranteed to have your visa cancelled.
Number 6 is so true as well. No kidding: do this and most people will refuse to help you or talk to you even if they’re perfectly fluent in English
I was told to smile by a 40 something Frenchman in a loud voice in Cêret a few years ago. He was one of those guys standing around outside a café. I was 70 and admit I wear my worry on my face. Although I felt offended, it did make me think about how I present myself unconsciously can make a difference.
Thanks as always, Diane.
So helpful! Thank you. Some things seem obvious to me - I’m older so learned more conservative ways of behaving. The discussion of chrysanthemums was interesting because it is the same in Asia! Being told to smile is irritating anywhere for me. I’ve been studying French like crazy!
My Father’s family is French Canadian, originally from Normandy. I definitely agree with yes, many Americans tend to be very loud, and it’s a poor representation for many Americans who are not loud, like myself. I’m quiet, but it’s how one is raised, perhaps? 🤷🏻♀️
I usually found it best to try the local language as for as I was able. No matter what country. That said, I’ve also met people who were offended if I began the conversation in their language when I wasn’t capable enough.
It's generally a good idea to try to speak the local language, even if there are mistakes or errors. You've made the effort to try, and people are taking a rather positive view of it.
As a French, I was kind of expecting some french bashing, but this is spot on !
You won't find any of that on my channel. I enjoy France and its people and call it home. ;-) Glad you enjoyed the video!
I saw a guy saying the french are cows. His pseudo was DeGaulle45. 😅
As always insiteful and educational thank you.😊
Years ago, while traveling with a NJ college group to Paris, I sat at the restaurant counter awaiting my friends so that we could tour the area. A French gent sat next to me and began speaking in French to me (sounding like DO YOU WANT TO as an English translation), I tried to answer in my fractured French. He stood up and said, in English, I THOUGHT YOU WERE FRENCH. I said THANK YOU FOR THE COMPLIMENT and he went away. I said aloud WELL, THERE GOES MY PICKUP. :) Funny but true.
@@MsBackstager Love this! 😆 Everyone speaks to me in French first, switching only after I ask( in French) if they speak English. I too find that a compliment. Flying home from France, a lady at the airport in the US welcomed me to the country saying enjoy your visit here (I was actually in my home state). 😁
He probably went away by shyness.
@@goldorakrak8939 Well, back then, I had a short page boy hair do and an off-white coat. So MAYBE I looked French.
Thanks. Basically, just act politely and respectfuly. Like, just behave like a civilized human being ! I ve met many tourists in Paris, mostly wanting me to take a picture of them in front of the Eiffel tower or Notre-Dame. They always have asked nicely, and it's always a pleasure to do it ! Just be nice, give a smile and a "bonjour", and all will be well ! Welcome to France, we're happy to have You all here !
French here, I've lived in the countryside and in cities:
1. It's totally true, criticising someone's cooking is really very disrespectful, even if the food is disgusting. We can give advice, but it can be complicated because, as we all know, French is arogant.
2. It really depends on the location. If it's a fast food place (kebab, tacos, etc), you could arrive in your pants and nobody would be surprised lol. In a brasserie-type restaurant, you need to be fairly ‘normal’ (a pullover, jeans). And then in more gastronomic restaurants, yes, you have to be very well dressed, but most French people don't even go there. Just dress reasonably and you'll be fine.
3. True, even if we don't really know flowers, it's better to choose others. And yes, it's a little tradition we're losing touch with, but when we're invited we give flowers. But I have the impression that we do it less and less.
4. It depends. Depending on the location, it may be acceptable. We can have big mouths. And even in some restaurants it's going to be pretty noisy.
In the street and in public places, though, yes, you should try to be quiet, even if many people don't understand it (and many French people don't).
5. Some people may say to smile, but it's more the family and for photos. And yeah if I don't want to smile, I won't and shut up.
6. Absolutely true. The English and the French have quite a tumultuous history and I think that's where it comes from. So starting with a bit of very simple French is quite useful for breaking the ice.
Like, ‘Oh bonjour, s'il vous play can I ask you how to go to this place?’ .Many people will find it difficult to speak in English, but if you are polite enough to start in French, the person you are speaking to will agree to help you as best they can (except in Paris, perhaps lol).
7. In reality, most of the time people don't give a damn. You just need to avoid taking photos of one or more people in particular. Karen are everywhere.
8. Yeah, don't show your money without modesty. In France, it's very difficult to find out how much a colleague earns, so it's a bit of a taboo.
9. Is there a nine?
10. It's kind of hard. Small talk is boring af, but precise question on your life is weird. I can't help on this, I'm not really good at it x).
I hope it helps
11. Don't wear a badge "Trump for President".
1) I'm pretty sure that insult someone or someone's work is offending all around the world.
2) It depend on the restaurant. If you go for a fastfood, nobody will care about your outfit, if you go to a 5 star, wearing a suits or a dress would be the least. And between those two extremes, only the context will say if it's appropriate or not. (Sport wear for a date isn't a good idea, for example). I'm pretty sure it's the same in the USA, or all around the world, too. And for the gym's clothes, it's a question of hygiene. Keep your sweaty clothes in a bag and wash them.
3) That's totally right, chrisanthemes are meant to ornate tombs. The worst would be to offer them to someone hospitalised.
4) It's a good advice for everyone everywhere, keep your voice low in public places. People around don't want to hear you chatting, they don't care, and maybe they want to talk to someone else too and don't want to be disturbed.
5) Yes, when you have a bad day, you don't want that someone told you what to do, and particularly to "smile". That's offending, but I don't think it's only french who think like that. There are way to say it cheerfully, and it may enlight a bit a bad day, but it's tricky.
6) Pretty good advice, here.
7) It's not offendig, it's illegal, and it's the same in many country. The law is more complex than that, but just don't do it, it will avoid troubles.
8) It's not really about beeing rich, it's beeing showy that can offend. It's a question of context, with your friends, there will be a lot of competition and banters, and showing off is natural, but it's a childish demeanor. Showing off front a total stranger can be really offending.
9) French tend to be more discreet than americans, you can have small talk, but don't be too personnal, or it could be taken as an attempt of flirting.
Sorry for the weired laguage and the typos, I'm self learner.
Hi Diane. Great video as always 😊
Thank you! 😊 Glad you enjoyed it!
@OuiInFrance I’m fairly new to your channel and I enjoy your content.
One thing that the commenters may not realize is that the US is probably 4 or 5 times the size of France. Within the US people on the west coast are different from people on the east coast and people in the south are different than people from the Midwest.
Just about everything you said also applies in the US. Except chrysanthemums, first of all why would anyone bring that flower to anyone’s house regardless of its significance.
But that rule applies in the US with roses. You’d never bring someone besides your partner a bouquet of red roses. Also the same with traditional Lillies …that’s a funeral flower.
Follow this simple rule when traveling especially internationally, you’re a guest in their country act accordingly!
I liked the bonjour tip. My question is when you walk into a shop and/or restaurant are you supposed to say it as you enter ? I used to live in Japan and when you enter an establishment everyone usually says…”Irasshaimase” which means welcome.
My local French bakery the (French) woman always says “Bonjour” when you enter the store while she’s helping others…so are you supposed to reply back. My initial thought is for one you’d have to yell it (as she does) and for me say it loudly back is interrupting…so what’s proper French etiquette for that scenario?
Thank you again for your content and as a side note…when you revealed what happened to you in that shop, my heart broke for you…I’d say his shop and blast him…but perhaps that’s the American in me 🤣👏
Also as a footnote…Americans at least most of them follow the unwritten rule of not speaking about politics and/or religion (unless you’re speaking with friends)
I think where the notion of Americans talk about money or possessions comes from when you meet someone, unfortunately a lot of people feel the need to size you up and they do that by asking personal questions…I agree it’s rude and tacky.
They’re asking you this to determine how they are going to speak to you….IMO that has more to do with class determination.
Hi, welcome! Thanks for being here! To answer your q about bonjour, I cover that in the linked video I mentioned about the importance of bonjour. But yes, when you walk into a small shop, the polite thing to do is to say bonjour to the shopkeeper (any person you encounter). You don't need to yell it across a supermarket to someone 30 meters away, but if you enter a small shop and there's an employee, yes say and definitely reply w/it if someone says it to you (no need to yell or say it loudly though in a busy bakery, just a normal bonjour). Hope that helps!
@ merci!
On my first visit to Paris about 50 years ago, it was very memorable to see every metro station and train car plastered with the "Ne se cracher pas" message!
Hi Diane. Another informative yet essential article on how to act properly no matter where you are. I don’t like loud or pushy people who dominate the conversation or expect you to know what they are talking about. Obnoxious behavior is bad behavior no matter where you are. And it’s not just tourists from the US who do this. I’ve experienced it with local folks speaking French while talking on the phone etc on the buses or metros in Paris as well as in the province even to the extent that the bus driver had to ask them to stop.
I simply can’t imagine asking someone how much money they make anywhere. It’s ignorant behavior. As to smiling all the time it’s insulting to think that one is entitled to a smile from a stranger. However, I have found that when I visit the same cafe or boulangerie several times, by the second or third time the bartender will recognize me and have my café and calvados ready for me always offering me a bonjour and cordial service.
I never forget that as a child, someone gave me a Tee shirt that said Smile god loves you. I have never forgotten that insult. I too am a serious person who can get lost in my own thoughts and that’s ok.
But on a positive note, there is a poster of a beautiful Bald Eagle’s face and head with the caption that said, “I am smiling “. A bientôt Joseph and Gigi.
Glad you enjoyed it, Joe. Thx for watching!
And yet, I've cooked (delicious) entrées at French homes and nice people felt free to shrug and say things like, "Not bad" or, the "cabbage was a little undercooked " in a dish. Why not the reverse sensitivity? ☺
You'll always find a critic at every table!
"Not bad", "pas mauvais" means actually good in French !
@ gsbeak Oh! I wish I'd realized that at the time. Thanks!
This is even truer if you come to Quebec, half of those we hate about the french also.
*and for the half that don't concern French people is talking to us in english, most people outside of Montreal will frown about this (personnally as a bilingual who speak a bit of a few other language it's arabic that annoyed me the most lol) so "Bonjour" and "Parlez-vous anglais" is a most here too
je suis dans l ensemble complètement d'accord avec toi !
I grew up using Claudine Pepin as my classy yard stick. I am an American of French descent. ❤❤❤
It's true that we are shocked by people talking loud. Americans are especially known for this. I remember an american man talking loud about a painting in a museum, I found it very bad manners.
So it's " bad manners " when an American does it but funny when it's a Frenchie? Double stamdards😮
This seems like common sense to me. I am going to Paris in July. Will be my third visit. My French is limited to 3 or 4 words yet, since I make an effort, the French have always been kind to me. I also wear more appropriate clothes to blend in.. When I was in Rome last year, someone just started speaking to me in Italian. I must have blended in pretty well 🤣
I'm laughing because I was in France last month and had a woman come up to me and start asking me for directions (in French) with no greeting. I gave her directions to city center but remember being a little surprised that she didn't start her inquiry with a "bonjour". And I'm fairly certain she was French from her accent.
French people sometimes forget too ;-)
Generally, when we want to ask a stranger for a direction, the standard starter is: _Excusez-moi_, seldom _bonjour_. :)
🤔Si vous êtes américains ou anglais c'est plutôt vous qui avez un accent . Autrement les français de chaques régions de France ont des accents différents .
She thought you were local. What a compliment 😊
I hate seeing people in fine restaurants dressed sloppily. But, it just shows their lack of class. It’s bad in the US.
Je suis un Francais de 45 ans. Petite rectification : vous pouvez aller dans n’importe quel restaurant habillé en jogging/basket. Mais en général, dans les grands restaurants chic et avec étoiles il est conseillé d’être bien habillé.
Un grand restaurant ne laisse pas rentrer un gugusse en claquettes chaussettes ou alors tout fout le camp 😂
Je préferes être un peu plus élégant, même quand je vais tout seul à à Charenton LP ou au 12e.
Some things have change!
@@Juliukas101 Quel est le sens d'être élégant en allant dans une chaîne de restaurant qui est tout sauf l'élégance ?
@@ResisterExister A chacun son truc. A chacun son style, alors. J'ai mon propre style. Quand je sors en public et surtout quand je voyage je préfere être habillé comme il faut! Je parle d'une une élégance discrète, vêtements de qualité en noir et blanc.
En ce qui me concerne, vous pouvez venir avec des chrysanthèmes, je serais incapable de les différencier des orchidées ou des pivoines. 😅
C'est bon á savoir. La prochaine fois, je disposerai un os au milieu...
Il ne faut pas les encourager. Mieux vaut qu'on vous apporte des roses rouges!
Great video! I wish Americans would adopt these courtesies. Being in the U.S. after being in France is painful.
I'm french and I'm not that easily offended, but I'm cringing at each point you evocate... for me it's a no go for each one of them.
I must add: in France, it is totally forbidden to film / take picture of people without *written* consent. This law is called "Droit à l'Image". Being in a public space do not allow you to take a picture of someone, contrary to the USA, and you can be sued if you do.
What you mentioned is true for the whole of Europe. Just replace "France" with "Europe"
Hello, I come from the perspective of my lived experience so I always specify France but the things I talk about definitely aren't exclusive to France by any means! When I've said "Europe" before, people will complain and say "Europe is a continent and diverse" so I try not to generalize to the whole continent and stick w/what I know to be true. Hope that makes sense! :-)
@@OuiInFrance But doing so, you raise a "french problem" while it's a "US citizen problem". When it is so, of course.
@@ResisterExister Not sure what you mean. In many videos I'll explain something about how it is in France and state "and many other countries in Europe." Nothing is a problem, just different cultures.
@ I spoke only for this video, sorry. I think going to a country and act as if you were in your own country is a problem.
Día de Muertos offends the French. 🙄🇫🇷 THEY insult mexican food and say “berk” making faces and twisting their noses. Waiters are very rude. And I say this after living 10 years in Paris.
Now I know why I could never really fit in even despite the fact that I was born and raised there.
Smile. My RBF (resting bitch face) scared my uncle on facetime the other day because I was listening to him without a facial expression. Some French ppl like to see a smile on a face I guess.
Food. Yes, they’re very touchy about it but if you can’t say anything nice about it just don’t say anything and smile.
Loud. Hell yes!! Working in tourism, we used to say that the Germans were the Americans of Europe. I live in the US and it’s even worse here. It only takes 1 or 2 to speak loudly for the entire room to raise the db level. F’ing loud-ass people!
Personal questions. In 20 years living in the US I’ve never heard anyone asking how much anyone else makes. I might not be in the “right” socioeconomic bracket for that but this is either a myth or regional. In France people don’t talk about that because most make jack and don’t mingle with the wealthier ones. French have a love-hate relationship with money which comes from the catholic heritage of the country.
Very accurate presentation of French attitudes, as always.
Many thanks!
🙏 especially for calling out “smile!”
Soooo annoying, right?
OMG I imagine my husband bringing a bouquet of Chrysentheme to my mum 😂😂😂😂
Bonjour d'Occitanie (France)
Pour la tenue au restaurant on fait attention, c'est vrai.
Pour le choix des aliments il y a une tolérance avec les étrangers, même si cela ne nous fait pas plaisir. Mais entre régions nous pouvons avoir des désaccords gustatifs.
On n'offre pas de chrysanthèmes en général, c'est une fleur qui est réservé au cimetière, puisque c'est la seule fleur qui est proposé pendant cette période, mais si la personne chez qui vous allez aime la fleur pourquoi pas.
Parler fort, il y a une tolérance lié au condition de la conversation, je dirais que nous n'aimons pas être indiscrêt.
Pour faire une demande, il y a le bonjour et le s'il vous plait qui est très apprécié en France.
C'est vrai que beaucoup de Français n'aimes pas les personnes aux revenues plus important qu'eux, moi je dit que c'est de la jalousie.
some Frenchfolk are not offended by loudness... they all tend to be a bit deaf though
I love the Spaniards, they're respectful, they're very civic-minded (much more so than the French), but, God, they are so darn loud!!
You forgot: When going for dinner in a restaurant, don't ask for sodas...😉
Do you live in a museum ?
Everything you say applies just about everywhere in the world except in America, like say bonjour, Goodday! Hola// I like the smile story, if somebody ask me to smile when i am not in the mood to smile I 'll tell them to f.... off. It never happens in France because nobody is in a jolly mood anyhow....🤣
Remember they are ( mostly) Latin people, so the males speak loud, same thing in Spain, Italy, Portugal, and Latin America. Machismo is not dead in Latin societies.
You have some really great tips. I’m going back and my leggings will be staying at home!
Bvaro! Bien vu.
Your point number 6 is especially good. Try French at first, at least a few words and most of us will answer in English. But don't start in English because it gives us the feeling that we are being taken for granted. Like everyone else, we hate that.
It makes SUCH a difference!
As a French I can absolutely confirm what Diane said. 1 Exception though : construction workers and all stupid entitled men do ask women and especially younger ones to smile on the street, which is insanely sexist. Patriarchy doesn’t have borders…
You just did yourself xenophobia and sexism in two lines. I think you don't realize what you just said.
Des hommes exclusivement demandant à des femmes de sourire (et non l’inverse) peut effectivement être interprété comme du sexisme, de nos jours.
@@methodeetrigueur1164 Parce que sa peut en être. Pourquoi dire seulement aux femmes de sourire exactement ? Et même sans ça c'est déplacé. La personne est peut être triste, passe une mauvaise journée, période etc ou n'a juste pas envie. On ne dit pas aux gens ce qu'ils doivent faire ou l'expression qu'ils doivent avoir.
@@methodeetrigueur1164 Parce que sa peut en être. Pourquoi dire seulement aux femmes de sourire exactement ? Et même sans ça c'est déplacé. La personne est peut être triste, passe une mauvaise journée, période etc ou n'a juste pas envie. On ne dit pas aux gens ce qu'ils doivent faire ou l'expression qu'ils doivent avoir.
@@aelitastone5629 Nous sommes bien d’accord. Par ailleurs, je ne connaissais pas cette « pratique / habitude » aux États-Unis… Déroutant.
You should explain that there income taxes and wealth taxes in France. The State taxes wealth. So people don’t talk about their wealth for fear that the tax man will learn about it.
The tax man always gets his share!
Some of these are rude behaviour in most countries. Just not very considerate
Food is not LIKE a religion, it IS THE religion here.
Always love your content. Thank you
je me souviens que Chirac qui parlait à tony Blaire de la cuisine anglaise ( on dit que la cuisine anglaise c'est de la merde mais quand on en mange on est deçu que s'en est pas )
Hmm. I'm almost fluent in English & I'd go try & speak to English speakers whenever I can. Would they feel offended too ?
If you’re in an English speaking country and approach someone speaking English, I don’t see how that would be offensive
dix sur dix =)
Thus, getting chrysanthèmes would be more awkward than annoying in my case, as you said we are nuanced people ^^'
Another one I find annoying as a Frnech, is how some people you just met directly call you by a nickname (Tom in my case) like and get very informal right away. Even in profesionnal context!
Yah the nickname thing is a big difference. My husband has always been Tom to me (and my family and friends in the US) but here, everyone at work and even his parents call him Thomas (Toe-mah).
You hit the mark with these offensive items you discussed!
Bonjour, Diane! Love your channel and have been subscribed for a few years now. One question... Can you recommend any online French instructional websites?
Bonjour! Thank you!
If you want to learn on your own (no live teachers), I recommend Lingopie which is kind of like Netflix for language learning, so if you're into TV/movies, that might worth a shot. It's linked in the description where it says "learn French the fun way." I've also done Lingoda in the past which is live video call classes with native speaker instructors. Just depends what kind of instruction you're looking for!
Great tips, thank you!
You are so welcome!
athletic attire is the bane of existence. Belongs in the gym.
The one time someone told me to smile was in Paris from a Parisian.
I'm sure he does well w/the ladies! 🙄
@ it was in a gay bar.
@@fredflintstone2234 So much patriarchy in gay bars. 😅