The good ones are taken we are left with princesses/ dating updates

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  • Опубліковано 22 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 356

  • @Ongezwajiyane
    @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +22

    Hey guys here’s my dating update hope you enjoy this video, please don’t forget to subscribe and don’t skip adds❤

  • @nomienoamabandlakaisa
    @nomienoamabandlakaisa 2 дні тому +26

    I am 38.I have two children 14 & 10 I recently found love and got engaged , do not lower your standards there are good men out there for real , The guy also has two children I think as people with children we need to also be prepared to love our partners children just like they will love ours. Do not give up on love and do not lower your standards I went through a thousand frogs before meeting my man

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому +5

      I am so happy for you sis, it gives me hope! It’s good to see other mothers finding love ❤️

    • @BrendaZuzani
      @BrendaZuzani День тому

      Iv given up on love,

    • @nomienoamabandlakaisa
      @nomienoamabandlakaisa День тому

      @ please don’t give up no matter what as long as you’re alive do not give up .. just pray to GOd and trust him
      🙏🏼

  • @Tumelo-tp2
    @Tumelo-tp2 2 дні тому +28

    As a man all I can advise you is don’t divulge much be mysterious, keep it nice and tidy as you’re clearly not looking for somebody to father your kids so why are giving away so much so early. Trust me kids do intimidate a man and when you play open cards too early we assume you need a helper.
    The relationship is about the two of you so nurture that tactfully till you can see where the wind is blowing. Loving your kids is a natural thing to do for any responsible mother but allow the man to fall inlove with you first before scaring him away. So I agree with your friend. There’s somebody out there for everybody, you once you stop searching and minding your life, your channel everything will fall into place.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому +5

      This coming from a man I’ll actually take this advice and I appreciate it thank you so much ❤️

    • @zanionde5103
      @zanionde5103 2 дні тому +2

      Such a great advice

    • @Tumelo-tp2
      @Tumelo-tp2 2 дні тому

      @@zanionde5103 I’ve been divorced for 5 years now after 14 years of marriage. My ex wife complained last year that having our 4 kids twin girls and twin boys is scaring the men away. I told her to stop involving my kids in your dates, are you looking for a father figure or a partner. She’s getting married this December and I’m happy for her. So my advice to you my sisters is coming from experience. Personally I don’t want any man near my kids and I don’t want more children either as Crawford is expensive😅so it’ll be unfair to look for somebody without children. What I’m trying to say here is there’s somebody out there for everybody. Patience is virtue and God does answer prayers. The number of kids is not an issue so don’t even touch on the subject till you know for sure the guy is wholly into you. My mom had 3 kids me included prior to marrying my dad and that man raised us well.
      When I tell my dates I have 4 kids living 65% with me they’re not thrilled as I refuse to introduce any to my kids and trust and believe my priority above all else is to ensure my kids are wanting for nothing hence I’ll never bring anybody home until I know for certain. Ladies there’s men like us out there just as there’s ladies like you out there. We just don’t want you to play open cards too early. Godly and successful men do marry women with children. Just await God’s divine timing and enjoy living your best life. Not all of us are blessed the same so do not compare yourself to your friends. Keep your values intact and don’t settle for nonsensical princessy dudes🤣

    • @BrendaZuzani
      @BrendaZuzani 4 години тому

      @@Ongezwajiyane u shud girl nd nam iv taken this one ,it makes sense though mtase

  • @mmali854
    @mmali854 3 дні тому +33

    It’s tough for all of us. I don’t have kids, but they always find something to use against me 😂

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Ayibo u lie? So it’s not a kid thing ? Just that we are left with nonsense man nje 😩

    • @Mpumephungs
      @Mpumephungs 3 дні тому +2

      @@Ongezwajiyaneit’s not Ongezwa, most of my friends don’t have kids.

    • @mmali854
      @mmali854 3 дні тому +4

      @@Ongezwajiyane yes. The thing I’m experiencing now is that they want to be my dependent 😭 and still act like it’s a blessing to have them around. Literally bo “babe can I borrow your car”, then gets upset when I say no, and accuse me of being a gold digger. It’s bad.

    • @leratoseooe1932
      @leratoseooe1932 3 дні тому +1

      ​​@@Ongezwajiyane we get bashed as though there is something wrong with us choosing not to have kids . Enjoyed this chat though. To many more chats🥂

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      @@Mpumephungsbut good man dololo? Yhooo guys let’s start fasting ngeke phela

  • @lulamalemoen5500
    @lulamalemoen5500 3 дні тому +8

    Girl!! I used to watch you talk about getting married and my heart just went out to you yazi... 😂😂 I get you though it's okay to want marriage and all that and you deserve it. I just want you to understand that the current climate we're in is not in favour of allowing us to dream. The reason I just don't date at all as a single mom is because I refuse to take time away from my kids for trash. The right person will come and do what must be done, I won't go look. On the other hand if it doesn't happen I am so content. I love my peace, I love taking care of myself and my kids only. ❤

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +2

      I love my peace too but umfana naye ngiyamfuna 😂

    • @lulamalemoen5500
      @lulamalemoen5500 2 дні тому +1

      @Ongezwajiyane he'll come when you're not funaring him, just watch.

    • @sweetbertharwabizi7049
      @sweetbertharwabizi7049 День тому

      I am very much on the same page with you! Peace over men drama.

  • @preciousmndaweni5157
    @preciousmndaweni5157 3 дні тому +15

    I have a child, but I can assure you, men are men, with or without a child. Men are always looking for the next best thing, you could literally be the best, they'll look for the next best😂🤞🏽.
    If you want to date these days, make sure you're busy with other things, don't focus on it😅

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      At this point I don’t even think they know what they want yazi 😩

    • @preciousmndaweni5157
      @preciousmndaweni5157 3 дні тому +3

      @@Ongezwajiyane social media ke sisi, they think there are so many Instagram baddies checking for them😂🤣 their delusion is real.
      I don't blame you from wanting to continue dating though, we're mammals, it's in our DNA and scientifically proven that we do crave companionship and intimacy, don't give up sisi, we're rooting for you, we're in the same boat ❤️

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      @@preciousmndaweni5157andizobayeka abafana I’ll just keep taking breaks recharge then go back😂 to

  • @phatsimolehihi4057
    @phatsimolehihi4057 2 дні тому +4

    Hi mommy...just wanted to share this with you and to all of us who desire marriage that when David faced Goliath, he didn't look at how dangerous Goliath was but at how great God is
    Love & Light ❤

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому +1

      🥹thank you sis i appreciate this message 🤞🏾

  • @lovelerato1
    @lovelerato1 3 дні тому +20

    Hey babe. Similar situation. I’m a mom to 1. I live with my daughter with very limited support structure. This guy and I are talking…. Then he wants to set up a dinner date, on a week day, and he lives an hour your of town. He literally pressured me to “make a plan” about my child. I could already see that I’m gonna have a problem with this man. I told him that I am a FULL TIME mom and I can’t just jump when he demands. That was the last time I heard from him 🤣🤣🤣

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +2

      😂ayibo sana but why approach someone whose a mother if u not patient 😢yhooo nam he never spoke to me again😩

    • @Nos_Masinga
      @Nos_Masinga 3 дні тому +3

      Very inconsiderate ke that guy...askies

    • @PutjusHusband
      @PutjusHusband 2 дні тому

      At some point you have to choose if you wanna be a baby mama or a wife..spoiler: after 18years the kids leave

    • @PutjusHusband
      @PutjusHusband 2 дні тому

      ​@@Nos_MasingaAve nidukisana😅

    • @lovelerato1
      @lovelerato1 2 дні тому

      @@PutjusHusband I absolutely agree ne 🤣🤣But wow…. A little consideration.

  • @entle_mota
    @entle_mota 3 дні тому +13

    I am in my 20's with no child and all these men wether in their 20's or 30's say is "when can I see you?", "Can I come see you."
    Imagine dressing up for someone to "see" you😏. The concept of dates is so foreign to them. The dating pool is the ghetto regardless of having children or not.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      We are in Deep S…$ 🤞🏾cos what the hell is happening

  • @MisuZama
    @MisuZama 2 дні тому +3

    Ongezwa makes me question my standards 😂😂😂. Flowers at the airport when he's just paid for your trip 😮... I'm a mom of 2boys, dating steady 2yrs now. There are no flowers but there's understanding, love & a future because I chose not to compare myself with others. Independence is for you, it doesn't make you the prize. You're looking in the wrong pool & unwilling to compromise. Don't drop your kids, but make space. Men won't be 2nd to anyone, nit even kids. Maybe wait for the kids to grow & to have more permanent help.... all the best Mommy. It gets better

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      But baby even 200 flowers from woolies 😩I’m not asking for too much

  • @salvationmasinge4225
    @salvationmasinge4225 3 дні тому +6

    Don't lower your standards,dont give up,some things are just spiritual,we need to pray and fast against the wrong men approaching us.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +3

      Yhooo the truth in this, it’s very spiritual shame

    • @PutjusHusband
      @PutjusHusband 2 дні тому +1

      Lower your standards😂😂😂😂..

    • @salvationmasinge4225
      @salvationmasinge4225 2 дні тому +1

      @PutjusHusband lowering unrealistic standards is understandable, however you can't expect us to accept men who expect to live off a woman,a felon,a man who doesn't fear God etc.

  • @beeg7353
    @beeg7353 3 дні тому +5

    I've had some unsavory experiences as well, as a mom of 1. The expectation to lower to lower your standards, the fact that they think you expect them to support your child, they think you are desperate to be chosen. Kuningi. I agree with you 💯, let's hold on to our standards and keep them on high. We are all worthy of good, healthy love single mother or not, and if it's God's will, we shall have it.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      Exactly sis if it’s from God I won’t have to lower my standards to accommodate someone who doesn’t value me because I’m a mother

  • @faithvezi8199
    @faithvezi8199 2 дні тому +6

    Dating is difficult in this present time because people think they have better options. He will treat you less because he knows he can scroll on social media and entertain 5-10 other women so it's better to remain single, love will find you and if it doesn't its still ok... God loves us!

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Yhaaa I feel like some women are spoiling these man for us 😩that’s why they just don’t care to put effort

  • @ntsako002
    @ntsako002 3 дні тому +3

    Hahaha Ongezwa, the caption already has me in stitches 😂😂😂

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      😂😂it’s the truth baby no other way of describing them 🤞🏾

  • @LiveLimitlesswithMsCandy-wp9dh
    @LiveLimitlesswithMsCandy-wp9dh 2 дні тому +6

    Mama let me tell you ,the bar is so low this days ,I don’t even get excited when a guy likes me coz I know it’s only for that day 😅,like why do this men even bother to go out of their way to get in touch only to want to be treated like princess 😅😂mina ngi phumile shame

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Yhooo iphume forever or u taking a break 😩

  • @melaniemadigage
    @melaniemadigage 3 дні тому +1

    Hi Ongezwa, sorry for your experience. However it is quite challenging to be in relationship with a person who really is honest with themselves first before they can be honest with the person that they are pursuing if they really have the capacity to accept and tolerate what another person comes with within a relationship versus them having unspoken expectations from the person to tolerate anything that they show up with. (Transparency and capacity introspection must be held amongst themselves) before pursuing a woman hoping they can the will have the capacity to tolerate anything just because of a person being resourceful financially.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      At this point asibayekeni abafana guys 🤞🏾

  • @Sinovuyo_ndude
    @Sinovuyo_ndude 3 дні тому +3

    Honestly the dating game is cold, doesn’t matter what you have or don’t we all experiencing the worst bunch of men. They want to be chased so much it’s actually crazy. I’m 25 years and I have been single for so long 😂😭I don’t have kids so it’s just not about having kids or not. Yho we have the worst bunch

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Yhooo sana and i thought it’s better for yall cos yall are still very young and come with no kids
      I guess man don’t want to see us happy as women nje finish

  • @Zine_Ngcobo
    @Zine_Ngcobo 3 дні тому +2

    I never miss a Jiyane sit-down video💃💃💃busy with will watch later

  • @NomaciraJam
    @NomaciraJam 3 дні тому +6

    City Mom sendikhona, I'm watching. Don't settle for less mntanam, abantwana bakho come first and don't drop your standards. I love you girl. City Gran all the way from Gqeberha. Kisses on Lubanzi's cheeks ❤❤❤🎉

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      Thank you my city granny much love 🥰 🥰

    • @lm7141
      @lm7141 2 дні тому +1

      ​@@Ongezwajiyaneplease dont listen to her..as a man..this is terrible advice..you come first..meaning you need to think more about your future..kids grow and leave..what about you? Unless you okay dying alone...remember..Loneliness is the worst Poverty

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      @ I’m not lonely though

    • @KolosaNywabeni
      @KolosaNywabeni День тому

      @@lm7141haibo😮

    • @KolosaNywabeni
      @KolosaNywabeni День тому

      @@lm7141haibo😮

  • @tulz123
    @tulz123 2 дні тому +3

    Me myself and I am over dating. Not even interested in men anymore at my big age of 38. I really do not have time for sassy men and most men these days are. Bafuna ukucengwa all the time and I don’t have time for that sh!t. Do you sweetheart and just be happy. ❤

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      The part of them wanting us to bag them I’ll never understand shame

  • @missramz207
    @missramz207 День тому

    Its rought out there.. when i was broke men used to think i don’t deserve to be treated well and taken out to nice places cause i cant do it for myself.. now i can afford but they still don’t make effort.. and aparantly now im struggling cause i give miss independence energy but in the past i was giving broke emery 😂 ku complex

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  21 годину тому

      At this point amadoda awazazi afunani

  • @sweetbertharwabizi7049
    @sweetbertharwabizi7049 2 дні тому

    The answer is decenter men!! Otherwise you will always be on the rollercoaster of omotions with them! I have been the young successful girl with a good job, my apartment and living my best life and still had horrible experiences with men. Then decided to have my son at 34! God! the level of fulfilment I have as a mother. I realized that whatever void I was looking to fill in my dating, God gave me a son to love unconditionally! Now! I just travel with my son everywhere I go, still with my good job and working towards my gaols and dreams relentlessly because I have the biggest motivation. My life is now very calm and settled without the nonsense that comes with centering men! I am very much at peace!

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Baby I have 3 kids at some point u will miss man trust me kusakusha kuwe

    • @sweetbertharwabizi7049
      @sweetbertharwabizi7049 День тому

      @@OngezwajiyaneNah! I am good. Been there done that!

  • @maggiemofokeng5270
    @maggiemofokeng5270 2 дні тому

    Ongezwa God willing, you will find love and a good father for your children. Some of the guys they might have children out there, and they won't tell you because they are not the ones falling pregnant. I'm proud of you. Continue to pray❤

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      I’ll definitely continue to pray 🙏 ❤

  • @minnie_phiwo1360
    @minnie_phiwo1360 3 дні тому +2

    Hey sisi, lalela I was waiting for this vlog I knew its coming🤣🤣🤣, listen most men nowadays are spoiled, they are used to getting women easy and having women who finance the relationship, so when they find us with kids they think we are desperate , dating life is messed up sisi, DO NOT lower your standards a real man will find you.......we always appreciate you, ukhonze kuBafo🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      It’s u saying u knew it’s coming 😂😂guys why yall didn’t tell amadoda anjena manje

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Yhooo it’s a mess and I’m not mentally strong for their disrespect

    • @minnie_phiwo1360
      @minnie_phiwo1360 3 дні тому

      @@Ongezwajiyane 🤣🤣🤣

  • @butterbile
    @butterbile 3 дні тому +12

    They treat us the same girl, I am freshly in my 30s and what I see is most of them are jealous of my progress in life, some ask me for money 😂

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +2

      😂😂😂I’ve experienced those kind of man who compete with me financially

    • @PutjusHusband
      @PutjusHusband 2 дні тому +1

      Welele...😂😂😂

  • @phumzilengwenya9847
    @phumzilengwenya9847 3 дні тому +1

    Hey dear your husband is out there hang in there... have a wonderful week

  • @madubazanedubazane3969
    @madubazanedubazane3969 День тому

    My sister 😢💔🤣 I don't have any kids kodwa yeyyyi umjolo has been nothing but a scam , but I'm still standing in hope that ngizom'thola umaqondana ka mines. Keeping my standards where they are and so we soldier on. 😅😅😅

  • @thabisotumelo3007
    @thabisotumelo3007 2 дні тому

    Tjooo hhai mna Ongezwa ungangibali ke lapho .. I just watch I add ye DHL it took the whole day yasogqiba😂😂😂❤ kwangena enye.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      😂😂oyini baby uxolo kodwa ngiyabonga sthandwa sam

  • @Viwe777
    @Viwe777 День тому

    😂😂😂jongaaaaa kukwa hell there by the dating world, ndaaphuma!!!!

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  День тому

      😂😂buya sikhaleni sonke

    • @PatienceKhowa
      @PatienceKhowa День тому

      😂😂😂😂kubi I'm 55 I gave up maybe when I'm 60 only God knows

  • @nonhlanhlambhele466
    @nonhlanhlambhele466 3 дні тому +1

    Iam here to like and comment will watch later after work......❤love you Mommy

  • @siyoslifestyle
    @siyoslifestyle 3 дні тому +1

    ❤❤❤ I watched all the adds without Skipping..😊.

  • @SakhileAndrees
    @SakhileAndrees 2 дні тому

    But I dont mean to be professional to you or rude.You look good wife metirial,you will yours that God will give to you there are good people out there as you said,just look after yourself and let God lead your way,dont try to lead because he knows what is good for you and if you dont bealeve,its not easy to which one is the right one they are many,otherwise they gonna endup using you wrongway mtase.Take care and focus raise your kids with love and peace,you not the only single that one must'n worry you toomuch.I got child after long time waiting but God always have plans with his people sisi

  • @thabi_a
    @thabi_a 3 дні тому +1

    🤣🤣 Ongezwa Sis haibo. We are left in the gutters & it's true respect goes a long way. I meet a this rich guy, like VERY well off but yoooooh his attitude . We on one date & I was like never umntu onjani lo. No manners what so ever. And the broke ones ke think you are going to be their blesser I mean I'm 33 & you're 440/45 how and I supposed to be your blesser. Ngeke men are off bandla

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Ayi ngeke yabona broke man I can deal with them shame those ones think we desperate

  • @NonhleMagwaza
    @NonhleMagwaza 2 дні тому

    l am a 31 year old single mom and l have been lonely lately and also tried but as you say that men are princesses now ai angeke mina lo ngihlangane naye shame he is always inviting me to his place like what must l came see at your place that l don't have at my place uyabo nguthi he just wants to use me for the deed nguphela so that was a red flag for me and told myself to just focus on my kids and myself and if l am meant to date l will meet someone naturally who will adore me and my minions. Lets be patient mammie God will bless us ngo thando one day but for now let us focus on building ourselves and be happy mommies and not depressed mommies just cause we can't find love just yet.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Very true shame let’s be patient and just focus on our kids because wow

  • @NonhleMagwaza
    @NonhleMagwaza 2 дні тому

    Hai siya gowisha sonke Mammie ngu love department!!!!!

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      I thought the ones with no kids are better

  • @anathimagqweta8483
    @anathimagqweta8483 3 дні тому +2

    Kunzima emjoloville Ongezwa. Mna umntu ndimxelela kwakula ncoko yokuqala ndingakhange ndibuzwe ukuba ndingu mother of 2 , different fathers. Andifuni sihlale nase tafileni nomntu ndingekamxeleli. Ndenzela ukuba azikhuphe kum kwa early before ndi dress up for idate ndi waste ixesha lam. If uyahlala makahlale endazi ukuba ndinabantwana andikwazi ukubafihla. Iqalwa ndim incoko yabantwana, if uguy akanamntana ndiphuma kuqala sana ndingekazicacisi ukuba ndina 2 kids

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Yhooo nam the ones with no kids andibafuni cos I don’t have time to explain myself

  • @sibongilemngomezulu3454
    @sibongilemngomezulu3454 2 дні тому +2

    I think as we get older dating gets difficult cause you now know your worth and don't impressed by some things 😢

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Having too much information can be bad sometimes

  • @chumilesimelane6192
    @chumilesimelane6192 3 дні тому +1

    City mum .. drink water and relax.. God will send someone for you. . If angekho don't change your standard and take Nonsense.. izakaya stressed and Milk you( abe umthwalo kuwe )

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      But he God won’t send someone if I’m not open to chatting to them that’s how I will find the one he sent by me being open to chatting and dating

  • @puseletsoish
    @puseletsoish 3 дні тому

    Loved this conversation and completely relate ♥. Personally, I've given up sana. I honestly don't have hope anymore and that's just me.

  • @zimasajam
    @zimasajam 2 дні тому

    Don't worry about people who are telling you not to compliment your kids. They will find on themselves if they are handsome or not later in life. I hope they grow tall

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому +1

      They are very tall dark and handsome 🥰

  • @vuyomtshali
    @vuyomtshali 3 дні тому

    I feel you Ongie engathi a lazy lamadoda. I have 2 kids, I was married before.
    Mna ke I'm not even willing to start😂😂😂 yhoo andizi.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      Yhooo maybe if I was once married sana but at this point I’m tired 😪

  • @chumajola2511
    @chumajola2511 3 дні тому +1

    Date and do not stop sisi, amadoda alungileyo manindzi out there. I think that the right one will find you. Figure out small ways to make them feel seen or valued without them feeling sidelined because you are a mom. Schedule fun dates to get to spend time together without being in each other’s presence. Here is an example: you have an online video date and eat the same meal (ordered via uber eats) and chat like you are together. But I know that God answers our desires. Goodluck!

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому +1

      That’s actually a great idea hey never thought of that to be honest and I’m definitely trying this one out thank you

  • @JOSEPH-is7wp
    @JOSEPH-is7wp 3 дні тому +5

    Hey Ongezwa, with all due respect I feel like you are not looking at things from the mens point of view as well. See as guys we do understand that once you date a lady with kids you will never be first in her life but I think you cancelling on him signaled that you are also going to put your friends and other things before him. Imagine a situation were a guy you are talking to was on a vacation with his friends in your location and you tell him that you want to link up with him but he says oh no maybe some other time because I will be chilling with my friends at that time. Wouldn't that sound off to you?? And the truth is that if you want a relationship you have to sacrifice here and there. What I usually tell my friends is that in order to have a good relationship you cant do it while being seated on your thrown, you have to come down from your throne and make a few compromises from your usual way of life, and indeed the same goes for your partner as well.....He is also suppose to make some sacrifices..... Thats what makes a good relationship.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      I wish i added on the video that I told him to come to my location when he’s done I was willing to even chill in the car with him if dinner didn’t make it but I guess he was already done with me but I hear u

    • @lm7141
      @lm7141 2 дні тому

      He did not feel like a priority my sister..Men want to be number 1..all of them​@@Ongezwajiyane

    • @lizwimasango6991
      @lizwimasango6991 2 дні тому +1

      Great advice ❤

  • @LifestyleWithSewa
    @LifestyleWithSewa 3 дні тому +2

    Umjolo unyisa everyone, my child is 22 the other day she was sick umjolo,I laughed in my heart 😂 I said to her kuzolunga let's chill and love ourselves first, uzomthola o right. ❤

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      😂it’s u laughing at her 😂😂😂Heyi bengithi kungcono kubona

    • @nhlanhlazitha5660
      @nhlanhlazitha5660 3 дні тому

      ​​@@Ongezwajiyanekunzima yoh😂😂 ziyakhala yazin

    • @LifestyleWithSewa
      @LifestyleWithSewa 3 дні тому +1

      @Ongezwajiyane Yes, I was the one who was laughing at her,angithi nami I've been through that ekukhuleni kwami kodwa she didn't know ukuthi ngiyahleka,when to think of it I'm still laughing big up sister don't lower your standards.

  • @SakhileAndrees
    @SakhileAndrees 2 дні тому

    And you must know no one is perfect sometimes you to buildup for yourself and you cant just choose what ever you want all the time.This is real we not go the same way as water.wait dont push forget about what your naibour is doing or having

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Ubhala isifanakalo kodwa unangaphi sakhile

  • @Sotobe_Omuhle
    @Sotobe_Omuhle 3 дні тому

    Ongezwa babes you have similar taste as mine , I believe amadoda are now living in their world where they don’t care .they are so heartless ,you will never be in my life while you are disrespectful I don’t care if you have money 💰 or not hlala kude le nendelelo.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Man with money are very arrogant 🤞🏾

  • @MbusoNkabinde-fb1zq
    @MbusoNkabinde-fb1zq 3 дні тому +3

    To the ladies just date young guys you will get exactly what you are looking for. Your age mates and the old guys will show you flames but asinamona continue going up instead of down

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Hebana 😂

    • @asiphileni8949
      @asiphileni8949 3 дні тому +1

      Ayi Nkabinde get flowers just flowers awuh maybe she had hinted the guy.

    • @SizakeleTwal
      @SizakeleTwal 2 дні тому

      I will never date a younger man. I'm ready to grow old alone

    • @MbusoNkabinde-fb1zq
      @MbusoNkabinde-fb1zq 2 дні тому

      @@SizakeleTwal you gona learn

  • @thabisotumelo3007
    @thabisotumelo3007 2 дні тому

    Even if they were agly .. you as a parent you do not have that right.. uthenina lo subscriber😮

  • @Mhizzy88
    @Mhizzy88 3 дні тому +2

    I just pray for your channel to grow, you’re so open and honest. Liking, commenting and watching the ads🥰

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      🙌🙌🙌🙌Thank you for the love, I appreciate it so much

  • @theo-doll_masuku
    @theo-doll_masuku 2 дні тому

    I’m a new mom, it was the pits before and it’s still the pits now. Worse kimi ke cos my baby is a few months old and they don’t believe that I’m single. He neglected me from pregnancy and they probably think there’s still room for us to fix things. So I guess it’s easier when the child is older then they’ll believe ukuthi it’s over for real

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому +1

      It doesn’t get better sisi we are going through it all

  • @WenZee_Wendy
    @WenZee_Wendy 3 дні тому +1

    Catching up mylove…kulungile ke bye😅❤❤❤

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      😂that kulungileke bye gets me all the time when it’s said to me
      Thank you for tuning in sis

    • @WenZee_Wendy
      @WenZee_Wendy 3 дні тому

      @ 😂😂😂😂😄loool

  • @PatienceKhowa
    @PatienceKhowa День тому

    ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤love you Ongi my homeline🎉

  • @masegomasina8618
    @masegomasina8618 2 дні тому

    I am childfree, new graduate, with so much love and progress to offer to a relationship. They want princess treatment still. So kuyafana

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Weeeeeee ayi I give up on the other gender

  • @portiamazwane5952
    @portiamazwane5952 3 дні тому

    Love your dress and cute baby face of yours city mom❤❤❤❤..... you're right good man are still out there...when the time is right it will happen mommy don't lower your standards at all.....nabo they have kids and expect to be respected and not lowering their standards!!!

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      Thank you sis🥰
      Ayi I won’t lower shame I’ll continue being single until I find the right one

  • @ThandiKhalaki
    @ThandiKhalaki 3 дні тому +2

    So for example, the Cape Town guy, you were expecting flowers at the air port, what did you get him? The guy who couldn’t meet you for lunch, what do you really expect? Your times couldn’t match. And am thinking he also can’t drop his work “just for a woman” as much as you couldn’t drop your kids “just for a man”. I have your chat. I agree with you. Men give us bare minimum these days, but to also be honest what do we give them? A lot of the times? You know your worth, he knows his worth too. All I just heard from this video was all you were expecting but didn’t get, I’m not hearing what you willing to give. All I’m saying is your expectations from men should match what they also expect from you. I think as women we have been made to believe that mjolo revolves around us, and that we are the main character in mjolo. And a lot of men have grown exhausted of that. Hence the behaviour. This is not to exclude the valid points you’re making, but to give you a different perspective. Iv also experienced horrible men, but that’s not to say I haven’t been a horrible woman my self. So sit down and reflect realistic, what you are willing to give, and what you are willing to receive.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      So I was supposed to go buy a man a gift on our first date, who’s perusing who here? This video was not about what I can give a man it was about man not putting effort in the early stages of relationships but I guess u didn’t listen to understand but to answer, also do what works for you if buying man gifts works for u continue I’ll also do things my way

    • @ThandiKhalaki
      @ThandiKhalaki 2 дні тому +2

      @ so he must do things for you, that your not willing to do for him? It’s not about perusing a man, it is about reciprocating in a relationship. He does something that you want, and you do something he wants. Both of you, must benefit and be happy form that relationship. It doesn’t have to be right there at the moment, but building a culture of reciprocity in a relationship, a culture of “show up for each other” HOLISTICALLY. And why is it such a bad things to buy a man a gift? Also, if I have a different point of view from you, it doesn’t mean I didn’t listen to understand. I understand exactly what you’re saying. Hence I also agree me to some of the point you made. I just have a different perspective on other points you made. And if you want to be a receiver of effort in a relationships at any stage, but not a giver of the same effort, perhaps it is a good thing that your taking a break from mjolo.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      @ okay

  • @SizakeleTwal
    @SizakeleTwal 2 дні тому

    I'm 38yrs nami and Ziyabuya shame. Just left a man who wanted me to expose him to my 18yrs old daughter. Priio to that I met a man-child, a princess who is wheelchair bound naye he wanted me to beg him ngoba anemali ndathi andizi. We keep it moving

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Yhoooo kanti what is it with the princess treatment they want from us ayibo

  • @patmbude6824
    @patmbude6824 2 дні тому

    Yoh sana...... kubi kubi kubi. Honestly isingathi abanye bantwana bane luck bafumana abantu aba right and everything ukubone. I dont even think yinto yoba unabantwana abangaphi and and .....akhonto intle qa for thina bantu bangenabantu kule age group qa ke ! mna sendidiniwe futhi ngoku andifuni noxoka

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Ayi masibayekeni cos andizocenga mfana mna asoze

  • @sina4628
    @sina4628 2 дні тому

    It's the pits out there honestly, banale mentality yoba there's more of us so if you know your worth the is someone who is going to settle for bare minimum 🚮🚮🚮

  • @Chwaitamanase29
    @Chwaitamanase29 День тому

    And here I am 33yrs mothering 4 with just one biological child did I judge no but guess who’s being judged lol ME!!! Also I will not go around over explaining myself

  • @snakhokonkendlovu9793
    @snakhokonkendlovu9793 2 дні тому

    You are naturally beautiful🥰

  • @angeliquekimani4608
    @angeliquekimani4608 3 дні тому

    Consistency at its best ...mama ❤

  • @YongamaNkohla98
    @YongamaNkohla98 2 дні тому

    The problem with men they always think they are the only ones who are busy so if they are free you MUST be available baphambene sana and they dont want to beg everything they say should go 🚮

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      I can’t do the chasing shame I refuse to

  • @NosiphoNtokozo
    @NosiphoNtokozo 2 дні тому

    The problem is that men think all women are the same. Because they're women that have a high tolerance to bare minimum. And now they expect us all to be the same and be as understanding as the women they have previously met. For example, the "all men cheat," etc. Secondly, women who have standards and are very outspoken find it hard to get into a relationship because immature men consider you as someone who is arrogant or stubborn. I would advise that you pray about it, fast, meditate, and manifest on what you really want and let God lead. As long as you do not find the right man, move on until you do. Multi-dating is my go-to thing. I second that advice. Because that's how most women find their soulmate. I hope you are having a blessed Wednesday, lots of love, Mntase🫂❤️❤️❤️ Say hi to Lubanzi, our handsome boy.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому +1

      Hey sis will greet baby L for u and thank you for tuning in 🥰

  • @moroesinkone4294
    @moroesinkone4294 2 дні тому

    Lately I had been thinking of trying to start date again but after now I guess I will just carry on with my dating break. 😜😅My son is almost 3 yrs and I'm still enjoying my single self.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Sisi ku tricky ku wow so I don’t know ma love it’s not easy shame

  • @PinkyMzomba
    @PinkyMzomba 2 дні тому

    Hey maka Lubanzi❤❤❤, hellow guyz ngala voice kaLubanzi❤

  • @MpuniSibeko
    @MpuniSibeko 3 дні тому

    Man 😂hence I said gudluck the other day ....they have options judgemental and apparently they don't care what you got house car money afterall they the providers unless his broke looking to be rescued❤

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      😩soze ke a broke guy andizi but yhaaa no ziyabuya

  • @keneiloemyoli
    @keneiloemyoli 3 дні тому +1

    Watched till the end and didn’t skip any ads ❤❤

  • @thabisotumelo3007
    @thabisotumelo3007 2 дні тому

    Helo Ongezwa❤sorry I just budged in😂😂

  • @thulinkanyiso1249
    @thulinkanyiso1249 2 дні тому

    Yey mtase siyafana I don't hv kids kodwa this boys xem mantombazana I tell you yoh..... They don't want to commit nje bona

  • @mercydyubele5582
    @mercydyubele5582 3 дні тому

    Hey Love. I thought Ndim ndodwa.I decided to take a break yhuu.
    Be

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Ayi baby we all going through it by the look of things

  • @tumibaloyi2915
    @tumibaloyi2915 3 дні тому +1

    Societal standards are messed up, especially where women are concerned.
    Once a woman has kids or is a particular age or is on the heavier side of weight, you are expected to be happy that someone is taking an interest and you must accept NOMAYINI

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      Yhooooo that could never be me I’d rather be single yhooo

    • @tumibaloyi2915
      @tumibaloyi2915 3 дні тому +1

      ​@@Ongezwajiyanealso they play too much these men, as they brag about their childishness. He picks you up intentionally with an old raggady car or takes you to a very messy house "to see what your reaction will be". Oh ntombi, nka scream-a gore. I've been out of the scene for 20 years and I believe God favoured me because WOW

  • @wezekabeja6379
    @wezekabeja6379 2 дні тому

    Ongezwa, try a white guy next time, ❤❤hope you find love

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      I’ve been told white ppl are better yazi

  • @BuuujeJwaaa
    @BuuujeJwaaa 3 дні тому

    Sana its difficult to uthola umntu ,i've been single for 4 year's then ths year i met lomfana we were cool masiqala i don't know what happened ivele yaphela nje kanjalo...en i was like will i ever find awam nje😂😂😂😂😂i give up now i have 1 child en ngiya ku 40 very soon 😢

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Yhoooo i thought badelela mna cos i have 3 kids 😂

  • @nyikorivonia9484
    @nyikorivonia9484 3 дні тому

    It shall be well my sister❤

  • @ntombifuthigumede
    @ntombifuthigumede 3 дні тому

    Babes, siyafuna ukubuza ngeCape Town inkinga uzothi sithanda izindaba which is true but still🤣🤣
    Yoh I wish I could send a vn. It's bad all around. Speaking as a 29yr old child-free lady. They think they are the prize. Like they are doing us a favour.
    My problem is they want to sleep with me 2weeks in lapho ke with me, the waiting period is 12 months. So far, nobody has passed. Ngaphuma kanjaloke egame-ini😂😂😂

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +1

      And please ibambhe kanjalo sisi ungajiki and once wabancisha ikhekhe ke bakushiya very fast

    • @ntombifuthigumede
      @ntombifuthigumede 3 дні тому

      So true! And uphume kuye with your dignity intact. My ex-boyfriend proved to me that men can wait 12months if they wanted to. He could be getting it somewhere else but he must know that he needs to earn it with you😅

  • @janedoe5510
    @janedoe5510 3 дні тому

    I'm 29 with 3 kids, unmarried and broken up with their dad and I have NO hope, ZERO of meeting someone and being in a real relationship

    • @Laylak42
      @Laylak42 3 дні тому +2

      Same hun I'm mom of 3 boys n just turned 30
      Stand dust yourself up and go on,be u do u ❤

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Eyi I’m slowly joining u guys shame I’m tired😩

  • @SizakeleTwal
    @SizakeleTwal 2 дні тому

    Ongezwa haaike sisi let me tell you mntase. Even the taken ones are trash. Bagcwele on social media DMing every women with a big ass and ama 2k. Wives sebehlalele I title, ring, kids and security. Most women are in love alone, they are in marriages alone. Akusenamadoda ngaphandle mntase nix nix

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Yhooooo it’s a moss masiphumeni ebafaneni

  • @Siphosenkosi-z1x
    @Siphosenkosi-z1x 3 дні тому

    Mama womtanam uLubanzi🥰 Umjolo yenye indaba nje. After I broke up with the father of my kids, I focused on my kids ndabayeka abafana. Now that my kids are adults I decided to go back to umjolo. Lo mfana yiExecutive, stays in Centurion expects me to pay for my flights to visit him. I blocked him mpaaa

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Ayibo uzibhatalele 😮njani 😩yhooo abafana guys

    • @Siphosenkosi-z1x
      @Siphosenkosi-z1x 3 дні тому

      @@Ongezwajiyane ungijwayela kabi la mfana😄😄

    • @babalwamakeleni699
      @babalwamakeleni699 3 дні тому

      Aba stingy sana, kanti what happened to love is a verb

  • @lungilembuyisa8566
    @lungilembuyisa8566 3 дні тому

    Hlalani vantase mina ngahlala 10 yrs ngisazinakile nje

  • @babalwamakeleni699
    @babalwamakeleni699 3 дні тому

    Mjolo the pandemic, ziyabuya mommy

  • @nhlanhlazitha5660
    @nhlanhlazitha5660 3 дні тому

    Hey cc 😍Kuzima kodwa akulahlwa mbheleko ngakufelwa kungahlangana even usuna 40above yazin i life le ngiyayazi❤😂

  • @sparrow62210
    @sparrow62210 3 дні тому +1

    My sister it's a disaster.The streets are full of princesses 😂😂

  • @twinmom9728
    @twinmom9728 2 дні тому +1

    You just gain a subscriber 😂😂 Late 30's let's just stay away from dating POOL

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому +1

      But it’s nice kwa love lies here😩
      Thank you for joining the family sis

  • @mthimkululerato9189
    @mthimkululerato9189 2 дні тому

    I’m in my late 20’s and I don’t have a child. All men want to do when they find out is to give me one 😩. Ene now chances are I’m gonna be a step mother

  • @ReanetseNyapotse
    @ReanetseNyapotse 3 дні тому +2

    I have lost hope when it comes to dating and at that time I am only 27 years old🤡 men don’t like putting effort😩 they want you to be a little bit stupid for things to work out. Most of them can’t communicate🤦🏽‍♀️ not that they can’t, they don’t want to communicate.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому +2

      Imagine losing hope at such a young age then what about us guys 😩ku tricky ku wow

    • @ReanetseNyapotse
      @ReanetseNyapotse 3 дні тому

      @ very tricky and I get tired of giving people chance and meeting the same person in different people🤦🏽‍♀️

  • @xolelwamgudlwa
    @xolelwamgudlwa 3 дні тому

    Sendikhona ndilapa, Hi city mom❤

  • @SizakeleTwal
    @SizakeleTwal 2 дні тому

    Checked in ❤❤❤❤

  • @SakhileAndrees
    @SakhileAndrees 2 дні тому

    Among those children fathers all of them were not good for you,there is something my sister and dont look at your friends relationshi thinking yours will go the sameway as them.Sometimes you need to wait and lesson to yourself s bit otherwise you keep on blaming other without knowing yourself.Zinuke amakhwapha mtase mybe you messedup somewhere no one is telling you.There is nothing wrong with kids and standard its not for your man its yours.Time will tell you must pray for yourself not for man😊

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      I wish i understood ur English but yhaaa whatever u said

    • @SakhileAndrees
      @SakhileAndrees 2 дні тому +1

      @Ongezwajiyane Yaa I may not write my English they way you expect my sister that's not my language I'm sorry,but looks like your expected are too high.mybe that's your problem don't undermine me please

  • @mslettiemathibe71
    @mslettiemathibe71 2 дні тому

    30, child free, getting my shit together & single .
    Sikhala sibaningi

  • @Milady---
    @Milady--- 2 дні тому

    They are treating us all the same kids or no kids TRUST ME I don't have a kid and I'm 27, I'm also single because I'm not going to lower my standards I know what I want and I'm going to get it

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Sana i thought we going through it cos we mothers 🤞🏾

  • @motlotlengmatshitse
    @motlotlengmatshitse 3 дні тому +2

    Nathi baya si nyesa 😂😂❤

  • @anathihlope2239
    @anathihlope2239 День тому

    I don’t really think its solely about the kids. I also have 3 kids wth diff baby dadies like u. But they act like princess even before I tell them about my kids. They wanna be chased amadoda. Maybe its social media giving them easy access to women and having multiple options because one thing about women sibahle and we are successful. The dating pool for men is very vast while for us kunzima because beautiful, successful and respectful men are very scarce and for us social media is not safe

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  День тому

      Yhaaa nhe kushukuthi at this point let’s continue grinding and focusing on our kids bandla

  • @nanasedibe3322
    @nanasedibe3322 3 дні тому +2

    I am 28, have no kids, and a relatively good career. I went on a date with a 40-year-old and I am still traumatized I thought dating older meant less trauma but that is clearly a big misconception

    • @fordesire9546
      @fordesire9546 3 дні тому +2

      honey the biggest lie ever told to young women was that dating older is better. I am convinced there is a reason men over a certain age are not married when there are so many good women of his age who want marriage: scum of the Earth

    • @Siphosenkosi-z1x
      @Siphosenkosi-z1x 3 дні тому +1

      Nana please stay away from a 40 year old, date your age or younger.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Those old ones are running away from us cos we know them they are nonsense and they go use these little kids

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      Eyi said date ur age those old ones will nothing but manipulate you because you are young

    • @nanasedibe3322
      @nanasedibe3322 3 дні тому

      @@Ongezwajiyane So true thank you for the advice never again

  • @lungilembuyisa8566
    @lungilembuyisa8566 3 дні тому

    Sebaphela abathengelana ama flowers usufika uwaphethe😂😂

  • @PutjusHusband
    @PutjusHusband 2 дні тому

    Im curious, would you kindly describe a good wife for Lubanzi.

  • @evahrakuba
    @evahrakuba 3 дні тому +1

    The dating pool is crap for us all

  • @MbusoNkabinde-fb1zq
    @MbusoNkabinde-fb1zq 3 дні тому +3

    7:59 if the guy doesn't stay in Joburg and asks to see you at a certain time can't you spare a few hours and go back to your friends? nami i would honestly disappear clearly icompromise ayikho. if you are looking for a relationship why do you act unavailable?

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  3 дні тому

      But I did say let’s do lunch I’ll be available I even told him to come to our staycation when he’s available will just seat in the car, u don’t know the whole story

    • @MbusoNkabinde-fb1zq
      @MbusoNkabinde-fb1zq 3 дні тому

      @@Ongezwajiyane if you did suggest sitting in the car than he didnt wana compromise...cause it would have been simple that way maybe he would have bought takeaways and yall eat in the car. haike you tried sorry

  • @nompumelelokhumalo6194
    @nompumelelokhumalo6194 3 дні тому

    ❤❤❤ As I'm about to watch.

  • @BrendaZuzani
    @BrendaZuzani День тому

    😂😂😂mtase sisonke jonga iv tried men out of my league men who dnt hv a car a house a decent job kuyafana at times i hit myslf for giving them my tym😢...ngoku sana ndizihlelele kucacile andingowomjolo mna ngeloxesha im 38 iminyaka imnkile😅

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  День тому +1

      Yabona those broke us are worse they usually think are desperate when you give them a chance

    • @BrendaZuzani
      @BrendaZuzani 4 години тому

      @@Ongezwajiyanejerrr never nd never again ndizipha ichance ezonkunkuma

  • @lm7141
    @lm7141 2 дні тому +1

    Sis, hhaykabi but Motherhood does not come first.. the sacred order is God, Men, Women , kids, family and friends.

    • @Ongezwajiyane
      @Ongezwajiyane  2 дні тому

      Was not talking about God on this video though was talking about relationships