Wow, You nailed it perfectly in my case. I didn't know what a narcissist even was back in the 70's. I was raised by one and 3 step dads but I didn't have a name for it. All I wanted to do was not be the way I was raised , and I'm not. I did not know I would attract a covert version of who raised me. I do now, but it's too late. I'm 70 years old and alone now after 35 years of marriage. She did what you call "The walk-away wife syndrome. No fight. No discussion. She just walked away when we were 60 years old. I knew her in high school but we met at church and became close friends. We called it going steady back then. It was wonderful! Can't do a restart now, and I don't think I ever dated before. We didn't have to back then. You would just find out through a mutual friend that so and so liked you. That meant you could call them and talk anywhere you wanted to and get to know each other. I didn't know I was attractive to a covert narcissist at all. Now I know why. I am that guy you just described.
I would LOVE if you could do a podcast! I think it would be very successful and helpful to many people! Your delivery is very palatable and easy to absorb. Thank you for your videos!
All my life I have suffered from extreme low self esteem and depression and didn’t know how to get out out of that terrible prison. My family was always held in such high regard, and my brothers and I played the part perfectly: we knew our role . But home life , especially when father was around , was a scary unpleasant place . For me , I learned to be invisible . I only know now as an adult that all my problems stem from that time, and even when I left home. He always treated me like I was an unwanted stranger . The Only time my brothers and I spoke of this subject was when my mother passed away , and we just couldn’t understand what our wonderful mother saw in this man/: We’ve never spoken about it again , and probably never will. When I heard he had Alzheimer’s and didn’t recognize anyone , I honestly felt relieved that I didn’t have to worry about his judgmental attitude , his indifference, his hypocrisy . I’m finally free.
I was a scapegoat, it was through the cleansing of the Holy Spirit when I became born-again that I had victory over all of it. I see now better than ever what a bankrupt family I grew up in and how much of the culture is like them. They all support one another in validating arrogance and selfishness.
I found you today and I am so grateful. Trying to heal from both my narcissistic parents and my ex husband who exhibits the dark triad. Was suicidal when my ex left me because all I did was try to prove myself to him. Realizing all my life I’ve tried to please my mom so I can get the ever allusive approval. 54 and trying to heal the way I think and feel about myself.
All the traits you described i had. Most of my relationships were abusive which turned into cptsd. I then was misdiagnosed and heavily medicated. If it wasn't for my intuition telling me to pay attention and figure out what was going on I wouldn't be here today. I have been consistently healing and reprogramming for 12 years the harm that was done while simultaneously doing my best to ward off abusers while healing. It's been a very long journey. I am lonely though because I no longer have friends or family. I found a therapist who helps me through the work have great boundaries , no longer codependent, reflect consistently on my behavior thoughts and emotions. Do my best to love myself as i am and sadly i still have these people trying to come into my life but the difference is now i can spot them immediately.
Communial narc parents are the worst. Omg. Going into later life when the communal part leaves its pure hell. Unnecessarily spent money to buy supply. Anything to get to a big event. Then the depression and lashing out. It’s hell. I’m glad it’s over. A friend told me that.
I like the way you explain narcissism. I was watching you on tik tok, but you tube is better because you can go into detail about the point you are trying to make without the 3 minute time limit. Thank you.
Thank you for yet another outstanding explanation of all the traits that Narc's have for there are several hidden ones as well that nobody thinks about.
Fantastic spot on for me so many resonate with me my attraction to my narc and staying for 40 years I beat myself up sometimes for my lack of awareness the wasted years of my life the financial emotional and psychological abuse But I am getting there through learning awareness from professional people like you who are teaching and helping us the victims to find ourselves Thank you so much Doctor God bless you To my lovely people our there who are and were victims of these weasel devils Please wipe your tears never give up continue working on yourselves stay close to God and you will come out stronger happier authentic Please never give up God blessings i love you all xxx
Ephesians 6:12 NLT For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.
Perfectly described. I wish someone told me years ago. I even saw therapists for years occasionally, and not one of them was clear, asked the right questions... The last one did, several years ago, and that definitely helped. That was exactly what kept happening to me. My much older sister was highly narcissistic. I finally started understanding it in my 30s. But it wasn't until my mom got sick and pretended less than before that I finally realized that my mom raised her as a golden child on purpose, groomed her as an extension and a bad guy to do all her dirty work. I couldn't understand why mom kept shutting the rest of us up, demanding we forgive our sister all her wrongdoings without consequences, and invalidating and devaluing us. Until mom got cancer, and my sister didn't want to do as much as mom imagined my sister owes her. Mom's mask finally came off with the pain and hardship she encountered. It was heart wrenching to see her suffer, be unable to help, and still have to deal with her mean streaks now clearly surfacing. Lots of l confusing and conflicting feelings and thoughts. Anyway, growing up, I was raised to feel incapable of anything, at fault, inadequate, etc. I kept getting into relationships with men who would start out seemingly different, but would gradually become emotionally abusive, two sexually and one even physically. That one marriage and three serious relationships, lasting 2 years to 6 months (as I started to heal, I tolerated less abuse and left sooner). It saddens me to think how different life could have been had I been allowed to develop, accepted as I am, loved and advised to take care of myself in different ways. But, when we finally see the reality, some of it, it's time to take off our old, kiddy shoes, and get new, better fitting ones as we grow, without wasting too much time on crying. Grieve the child that was hurt, and then focus on life now, which is the only true reality.
Trauma is especially sad. Also, narcissists I met had zero empathy and little interest in your trauma, except if it matches their childhood pain (their narcissistic mother or father). It became so clear that I started using such conversation to help me distinguish whether a new person is safe or not. If you had trauma in your life, you develop some trust and share it, and someone eases over it, run the other way. Even if they are a psychiatrist (my ex was) or in another field that is exposed to traumatized people on regular basis. A person who cares about you never desensitizes to your pain. It's always a red flag when someone doesn't show empathy to traumatized individuals. Also guilt. I noticed they all said very strongly that guilt is a waste of time and an unnecessary feeling. If I felt it was of some value, I went deeper into that conversation by asking if it's adequate to feel guilt once we do something wrong. Is there an appropriate amount of guilt. The more narcissistic, the less they accept any degree of guilt, and mix up the definition of the word guilt with definition of shame. Once I learned more about narcissism, I realized how lucky I was to not have met the worst amongst them. It's so much easier to see more clearly now, and so comforting to know how to not engage into problematic relationshipa.
I'm trying so hard to get out of my marriage this is my 1st encounter with a narcissist and I know that word is thrown around a lot I actually started googling like the things that he does and that's how I found out he is in fact a full blown narcissist the problem I have is hes covered in scars from physical abuse he suffered as a child I assume that's why he turned out like this has no emotions besides anger no efficiency so I make excuses and feel bad for him. I'm fully aware that this person does not care about me at all yet I'm the one in the floor crying feeling bad for leaving him
That is the sad, paradoxical psychological trap. Many narcissists have childhood trauma in their histories, and your empathy for them is weaponized, not appreciated. This is what keeps many empathic people trapped in a relationship, feeling sorry for their trauma and in turn allowing them to abuse you. The thing is, when we have trauma or any other emotional or psychological issue, it is up to us to do the work to recover from it, not to project our pain on to other people.
To Katie Johnson: I empathize.. My first husband & my brother were both abused by their fathers, so I kept bending over backward to help both of them. I got used & abused to the Nth degree. I had no idea about personality disorders until very late in my life, so I wasted way too many years being a doormat. I believe the current narcopath in my life was also abused by his angry, narcisstic alcoholic father bc of the things he told me early in the love bombing stage. His father was deceased by then. I don't feel sorry for this narcopath, he's an arrogant, dangerous, reckless alcoholic, but fake charming enough to have tons of flying monkeys.
Kshe Johnson. Just leave them at any cost, after all if you don't have your health, then you have nothing. (You can see clearly AFTER you've left them).
This is so helpful to me. I've been trying to figure out why the covert narcissist who after many decades - I have finally detached from - had so much control over me and was so attracted to me. I fit into several of the categories outlined in this video. The information is helpful as I move forward and work to avoid another unhealthy relationship. Thanks so much.
I was married to a narcissist for 13 yrs, had 3 children with him he cheated the entire marriage and now I'm married to another one..first one left bc he cheated and "fell in love" ..can't get rid of this one for nothing..and he's making my children miserable
You have the power to walk away from this present husband. You'll feel on top of the world once you do 👍👌👍 Your children have no control as to living with him because your not placing their sanity before you personal fears....so open your heart and love and respect yourself by walking away and never looking back. You've repeated this cycle of marrying yet another Narc that mirrors your first husband so remember this will keep recreating itself until you find COURAGE AND STRENTH to finally choose YOU!!! I am a survivor of Narcassistic abuse across the board with my Mother...3 Brothers...friends....boss....neighbors etc.... They are in your life to help you let go of being codependent upon another in order for you to find happiness so please get some help with a great therapist just as this wonderful gentleman 🙏
The first and foremost reason for this is because you haven't healed from the first marriage. The most important thing here's your children are looking to for guidance. Healthy children are a must in our society and families. There's nothing more devastating than to be in a relationship with someone else is the same as the first one. The obvious reason is within us....especially when we alone have a certain type 🐂 🚹 The type is "bad boy " image ....we can't change what we don't acknowledge...is we believe we're not deserve good..rather than bad. Change your mind and you'll change the choices in men friends and relatives who are in your life.
Im going through my second divorce. First was a malignant narc, very physically abusive. I stayed with the second one because i didn't know what covert narcissism was. Instead i thought he has Aspergers or something which he played pretty well. I looked 20 years older than i was and became so defeated i didn't see the light and was really depressed. Since the separation things became clear. I'm now healing and undergoing emdr therapy. I've gone back to work and started to learn to laugh again. I have my life and my soul back. The divorce is almost finalized and although i have no idea what will happen financially, i no longer care. I'm happy. I love my life and myself now. I can't imagine ever going back. I pray the Lord gives you strength to get healthy for yourself and your children. You all deserve to be happy and loved and secure ❤
That 1st husband didn't leave because he was in love, they don't love. My husband, covert left me recently for his coworker. I wish you healing and wellness ❤
I just recently discovered your channel. You explain things very well; I wish I would have understood these behaviors in my younger years, it would have saved me a lot of grief and money. Thank you for your generosity and videos.
6:42 "- - so they'll be attracted to beautiful people" Made me think about how my father was a gorgeous-looking young man and now that he's overweight (has been throughout my childhood), my mother is picking him up about that _all the time._ Has been for years and years. She really seems to resent him, which is incredibly sad to look at.
And now a word on behalf of all the narcissists out there. HELP. Looking for a narcissist to take control of my low self esteem and make my life just a little more complicated than it already is. Any volunteers?
I wonder if they are compelled to be around empathetic people, so they are physically near someone who can relate to others??? This might help them avoid the emptiness they posess when by themselves??
My authentic self is talking really straight and lifting honesty, but... Should I also think how I say things? Sometimes I am really straight, in those points I feel really vulnerable too
Some narcissistic people are aware they are, so self awareness doesn’t guarantee you are not. Best way is to see a psychiatrist and ask about it, preferably multiple of them.
Learn about other cultures well enough before explaining in public. Your voice create total wrong in certain areas . Don’t ever compare narcissist in states to Asian cultures and it’s people. You still have to learn many more things. Sometime people can fall in love with others without knowing that they are narcissists . It doesn’t mean that they are also traumatized and broken , HELL NO!! Not at all! They even have never heard of Narcsism . They are born spiritual calm and well balanced decent people . So don’t take this wrong
Growing up with no affection made affection seem like the lottery. Harder to break up with people when some bit of validation meant so much.
I’ve said it before, you are an excellent therapist. Knowledgeable, compassionate, caring, and that calm confidence that’s so intriguing.
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Wow, You nailed it perfectly in my case. I didn't know what a narcissist even was back in the 70's. I was raised by one and 3 step dads but I didn't have a name for it. All I wanted to do was not be the way I was raised , and I'm not. I did not know I would attract a covert version of who raised me. I do now, but it's too late. I'm 70 years old and alone now after 35 years of marriage. She did what you call "The walk-away wife syndrome. No fight. No discussion. She just walked away when we were 60 years old. I knew her in high school but we met at church and became close friends. We called it going steady back then. It was wonderful! Can't do a restart now, and I don't think I ever dated before. We didn't have to back then. You would just find out through a mutual friend that so and so liked you. That meant you could call them and talk anywhere you wanted to and get to know each other. I didn't know I was attractive to a covert narcissist at all. Now I know why. I am that guy you just described.
I would LOVE if you could do a podcast! I think it would be very successful and helpful to many people! Your delivery is very palatable and easy to absorb. Thank you for your videos!
Thank you. That means a lot to me when I hear the videos are helpful.🙏
I enjoy all of you videos. I need to stop attracting these Narcisstic men. So toxic
All my life I have suffered from extreme low self esteem and depression and didn’t know how to get out out of that terrible prison. My family was always held in such high regard, and my brothers and I played the part perfectly: we knew our role . But home life , especially when father was around , was a scary unpleasant place . For me , I learned to be invisible . I only know now as an adult that all my problems stem from that time, and even when I left home. He always treated me like I was an unwanted stranger . The Only time my brothers and I spoke of this subject was when my mother passed away , and we just couldn’t understand what our wonderful mother saw in this man/: We’ve never spoken about it again , and probably never will. When I heard he had Alzheimer’s and didn’t recognize anyone , I honestly felt relieved that I didn’t have to worry about his judgmental attitude , his indifference, his hypocrisy . I’m finally free.
I’m sorry you and your brother had to go through that . I totally get it.
That's me, the navie idiot, with the mother who was always jealous and never showed op in high school. Now I'm like a magnet to those people
I was a scapegoat, it was through the cleansing of the Holy Spirit when I became born-again that I had victory over all of it. I see now better than ever what a bankrupt family I grew up in and how much of the culture is like them. They all support one another in validating arrogance and selfishness.
I found you today and I am so grateful. Trying to heal from both my narcissistic parents and my ex husband who exhibits the dark triad. Was suicidal when my ex left me because all I did was try to prove myself to him. Realizing all my life I’ve tried to please my mom so I can get the ever allusive approval. 54 and trying to heal the way I think and feel about myself.
What a great video. Thank you. I now understand why narcissists are attracted to me. I have several of those traits. Trauma being the biggest thing.
All the traits you described i had. Most of my relationships were abusive which turned into cptsd. I then was misdiagnosed and heavily medicated. If it wasn't for my intuition telling me to pay attention and figure out what was going on I wouldn't be here today. I have been consistently healing and reprogramming for 12 years the harm that was done while simultaneously doing my best to ward off abusers while healing. It's been a very long journey. I am lonely though because I no longer have friends or family. I found a therapist who helps me through the work have great boundaries , no longer codependent, reflect consistently on my behavior thoughts and emotions. Do my best to love myself as i am and sadly i still have these people trying to come into my life but the difference is now i can spot them immediately.
You have a radiant energy
You are SO knowledgeable. I relate to all you shared.
I'm glad to hear the videos are helpful.🙏
Communial narc parents are the worst. Omg. Going into later life when the communal part leaves its pure hell. Unnecessarily spent money to buy supply. Anything to get to a big event. Then the depression and lashing out. It’s hell. I’m glad it’s over. A friend told me that.
I like the way you explain narcissism. I was watching you on tik tok, but you tube is better because you can go into detail about the point you are trying to make without the 3 minute time limit. Thank you.
Thank you for yet another outstanding explanation of all the traits that Narc's have for there are several hidden ones as well that nobody thinks about.
Fantastic
spot on for me so many resonate with me my attraction to my narc and staying for 40 years
I beat myself up sometimes for my lack of awareness the wasted years of my life the financial emotional and psychological abuse
But I am getting there through learning awareness from professional people like you who are teaching and helping us the victims to find ourselves
Thank you so much Doctor God bless you
To my lovely people our there who are and were victims of these weasel devils
Please wipe your tears
never give up continue working on yourselves stay close to God and you will come out stronger happier authentic
Please never give up
God blessings i love you all xxx
Ephesians 6:12 NLT
For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.
Perfectly described.
I wish someone told me years ago. I even saw therapists for years occasionally, and not one of them was clear, asked the right questions...
The last one did, several years ago, and that definitely helped.
That was exactly what kept happening to me. My much older sister was highly narcissistic. I finally started understanding it in my 30s. But it wasn't until my mom got sick and pretended less than before that I finally realized that my mom raised her as a golden child on purpose, groomed her as an extension and a bad guy to do all her dirty work. I couldn't understand why mom kept shutting the rest of us up, demanding we forgive our sister all her wrongdoings without consequences, and invalidating and devaluing us. Until mom got cancer, and my sister didn't want to do as much as mom imagined my sister owes her. Mom's mask finally came off with the pain and hardship she encountered. It was heart wrenching to see her suffer, be unable to help, and still have to deal with her mean streaks now clearly surfacing. Lots of l confusing and conflicting feelings and thoughts. Anyway, growing up, I was raised to feel incapable of anything, at fault, inadequate, etc. I kept getting into relationships with men who would start out seemingly different, but would gradually become emotionally abusive, two sexually and one even physically. That one marriage and three serious relationships, lasting 2 years to 6 months (as I started to heal, I tolerated less abuse and left sooner).
It saddens me to think how different life could have been had I been allowed to develop, accepted as I am, loved and advised to take care of myself in different ways.
But, when we finally see the reality, some of it, it's time to take off our old, kiddy shoes, and get new, better fitting ones as we grow, without wasting too much time on crying. Grieve the child that was hurt, and then focus on life now, which is the only true reality.
Trauma is especially sad. Also, narcissists I met had zero empathy and little interest in your trauma, except if it matches their childhood pain (their narcissistic mother or father). It became so clear that I started using such conversation to help me distinguish whether a new person is safe or not.
If you had trauma in your life, you develop some trust and share it, and someone eases over it, run the other way. Even if they are a psychiatrist (my ex was) or in another field that is exposed to traumatized people on regular basis. A person who cares about you never desensitizes to your pain. It's always a red flag when someone doesn't show empathy to traumatized individuals.
Also guilt. I noticed they all said very strongly that guilt is a waste of time and an unnecessary feeling. If I felt it was of some value, I went deeper into that conversation by asking if it's adequate to feel guilt once we do something wrong. Is there an appropriate amount of guilt. The more narcissistic, the less they accept any degree of guilt, and mix up the definition of the word guilt with definition of shame.
Once I learned more about narcissism, I realized how lucky I was to not have met the worst amongst them.
It's so much easier to see more clearly now, and so comforting to know how to not engage into problematic relationshipa.
I'm trying so hard to get out of my marriage this is my 1st encounter with a narcissist and I know that word is thrown around a lot I actually started googling like the things that he does and that's how I found out he is in fact a full blown narcissist the problem I have is hes covered in scars from physical abuse he suffered as a child I assume that's why he turned out like this has no emotions besides anger no efficiency so I make excuses and feel bad for him. I'm fully aware that this person does not care about me at all yet I'm the one in the floor crying feeling bad for leaving him
That is the sad, paradoxical psychological trap. Many narcissists have childhood trauma in their histories, and your empathy for them is weaponized, not appreciated. This is what keeps many empathic people trapped in a relationship, feeling sorry for their trauma and in turn allowing them to abuse you. The thing is, when we have trauma or any other emotional or psychological issue, it is up to us to do the work to recover from it, not to project our pain on to other people.
To Katie Johnson: I empathize.. My first husband & my brother were both abused by their fathers, so I kept bending over backward to help both of them. I got used & abused to the Nth degree. I had no idea about personality disorders until very late in my life, so I wasted way too many years being a doormat. I believe the current narcopath in my life was also abused by his angry, narcisstic alcoholic father bc of the things he told me early in the love bombing stage. His father was deceased by then. I don't feel sorry for this narcopath, he's an arrogant, dangerous, reckless alcoholic, but fake charming enough to have tons of flying monkeys.
Kshe Johnson. Just leave them at any cost, after all if you don't have your health, then you have nothing. (You can see clearly AFTER you've left them).
This is so helpful to me. I've been trying to figure out why the covert narcissist who after many decades - I have finally detached from - had so much control over me and was so attracted to me. I fit into several of the categories outlined in this video. The information is helpful as I move forward and work to avoid another unhealthy relationship. Thanks so much.
I was married to a narcissist for 13 yrs, had 3 children with him he cheated the entire marriage and now I'm married to another one..first one left bc he cheated and "fell in love" ..can't get rid of this one for nothing..and he's making my children miserable
You have the power to walk away from this present husband. You'll feel on top of the world once you do 👍👌👍 Your children have no control as to living with him because your not placing their sanity before you personal fears....so open your heart and love and respect yourself by walking away and never looking back. You've repeated this cycle of marrying yet another Narc that mirrors your first husband so remember this will keep recreating itself until you find COURAGE AND STRENTH to finally choose YOU!!! I am a survivor of Narcassistic abuse across the board with my Mother...3 Brothers...friends....boss....neighbors etc....
They are in your life to help you let go of being codependent upon another in order for you to find happiness so please get some help with a great therapist just as this wonderful gentleman 🙏
The first and foremost reason for this is because you haven't healed from the first marriage. The most important thing here's your children are looking to for guidance. Healthy children are a must in our society and families. There's nothing more devastating than to be in a relationship with someone else is the same as the first one. The obvious reason is within us....especially when we alone have a certain type 🐂 🚹 The type is "bad boy " image ....we can't change what we don't acknowledge...is we believe we're not deserve good..rather than bad. Change your mind and you'll change the choices in men friends and relatives who are in your life.
Im going through my second divorce. First was a malignant narc, very physically abusive. I stayed with the second one because i didn't know what covert narcissism was. Instead i thought he has Aspergers or something which he played pretty well. I looked 20 years older than i was and became so defeated i didn't see the light and was really depressed.
Since the separation things became clear. I'm now healing and undergoing emdr therapy. I've gone back to work and started to learn to laugh again. I have my life and my soul back. The divorce is almost finalized and although i have no idea what will happen financially, i no longer care. I'm happy. I love my life and myself now. I can't imagine ever going back. I pray the Lord gives you strength to get healthy for yourself and your children. You all deserve to be happy and loved and secure ❤
You must especially for your children. I didn't realize how badly my ex effected my children secretly.
That 1st husband didn't leave because he was in love, they don't love. My husband, covert left me recently for his coworker. I wish you healing and wellness ❤
I just recently discovered your channel. You explain things very well; I wish I would have understood these behaviors in my younger years, it would have saved me a lot of grief and money. Thank you for your generosity and videos.
Yes, my sister tells me i am naive...and manipulates me...
Wow I wish you were my therapist!
All my good traits have made me a victim. Took me a while to see that. It kind of breaks my own heart.
Yes! I relate
Same...
I sometimes try to avoid conflict or someone who i feel like might want a conflict
6:42 "- - so they'll be attracted to beautiful people"
Made me think about how my father was a gorgeous-looking young man and now that he's overweight (has been throughout my childhood), my mother is picking him up about that _all the time._ Has been for years and years. She really seems to resent him, which is incredibly sad to look at.
They are predators.
THANK YOU SO.MUCH. THIS WAS VERY INFORMATIVE.👍
And now a word on behalf of all the narcissists out there. HELP. Looking for a narcissist to take control of my low self esteem and make my life just a little more complicated than it already is. Any volunteers?
Thank you 🙏
This is so clear.
I wonder if they are compelled to be around empathetic people, so they are physically near someone who can relate to others??? This might help them avoid the emptiness they posess when by themselves??
Thank you for the video
You're welcome! I hope it was helpful.
My authentic self is talking really straight and lifting honesty, but... Should I also think how I say things? Sometimes I am really straight, in those points I feel really vulnerable too
This has really helped me….thank you 💛
Thank you so much. Such a great video.
Great message. Nice people get a hit job by whackos
This is very interesting 🤨
I have all of them 😢
Why is this me with all these signs
Hi how I can find out if I am not narcissistic it’s my biggest fear that I am and I am hurting people I love or care about
Nice kind helpful people?
How do I know I'm not a covert narcissist?
Most narcissist don't question whether they are?
Some narcissistic people are aware they are, so self awareness doesn’t guarantee you are not. Best way is to see a psychiatrist and ask about it, preferably multiple of them.
Background music is too distracting
Disappointing you don’t include Sandra Browns work which is based on research studies suggesting pathological individuals prey on particular traits.
Woooow !!!
Learn about other cultures well enough before explaining in public. Your voice create total wrong in certain areas . Don’t ever compare narcissist in states to Asian cultures and it’s people. You still have to learn many more things. Sometime people can fall in love with others without knowing that they are narcissists . It doesn’t mean that they are also traumatized and broken , HELL NO!! Not at all!
They even have never heard of Narcsism . They are born spiritual calm and well balanced decent people . So don’t take this wrong