How to Raise a Child

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  • Опубліковано 2 жов 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 723

  • @sumote1947
    @sumote1947 5 років тому +864

    I couldn't breathe when the interrogation sequence started

    • @julianha5473
      @julianha5473 5 років тому +193

      Neither could the baby

    • @urayamashi493
      @urayamashi493 5 років тому +8

      @@julianha5473 LMAO YOU MADE THAT BETTER

    • @RedFenceAnime
      @RedFenceAnime 5 років тому +23

      WHERE'S THE MONEY LEBOWSKI

    • @alex985441
      @alex985441 5 років тому +9

      That is one tough baby, he ain't talking.

    • @one6890
      @one6890 5 років тому +1

      DavidFish *BABY GETS DUNKED IN WATER* WHERES THE FUCKING MONEY

  • @whereismybread
    @whereismybread 5 років тому +1821

    _How to raise a baby as a dad :_
    1. _Go to the gas station and never come back_

    • @hemeleh8683
      @hemeleh8683 5 років тому +29

      that touched me in a deep level

    • @panpsalt6757
      @panpsalt6757 5 років тому +24

      Come back seven years later saying the line was too long.

    • @felixruthgard471
      @felixruthgard471 5 років тому +14

      My dad sure did a good job with that....

    • @avalonblade2784
      @avalonblade2784 5 років тому +22

      Instruction unclear, child ended up going to the gas station and never came back

    • @idkshtt
      @idkshtt 5 років тому +3

      Buy milk

  • @Thxgator
    @Thxgator 5 років тому +463

    "Dark Mom"
    No wonder I couldn't find a Dark Dad in this one.

  • @Hebi-Y
    @Hebi-Y 5 років тому +1503

    *Holy Crap !*
    _We can raise childs in league of legends now !?_

    • @Thxgator
      @Thxgator 5 років тому +76

      That ain't new, it's called carrying Annie players

    • @zzacci887
      @zzacci887 5 років тому +13

      Nah. People who play league never get children.

    • @dandytastic7465
      @dandytastic7465 5 років тому +10

      Playing league is taking care of 4 children as a child that is the only way you can stay sane

    • @maxydring558
      @maxydring558 5 років тому +1

      @@zzacci887 virgins.

    • @meep7219
      @meep7219 5 років тому +7

      No offense but "childs"

  • @RakdosRabbit
    @RakdosRabbit 5 років тому +196

    Best notification I’ve received all week, let’s go

  • @ralphize5153
    @ralphize5153 5 років тому +368

    Feed him the SOOOOOOUUUUUUULS

  • @zacarova9489
    @zacarova9489 5 років тому +70

    He's really doing it. He's surpassing the gods. I thought no mortal could ever reach that level. He's caretaking without needing to think.
    *It's...Ultra Mom*

  • @ZAPPERZ_
    @ZAPPERZ_ 5 років тому +349

    Why is there no father in this game?



    Thats becouse we are playing as karen , who took the kid.

    • @kowen112
      @kowen112 5 років тому +8

      Mateusz Nowak No, its because we were playing with the african mom dlc

    • @Rckyarthus
      @Rckyarthus 4 роки тому +1

      Nah the karen part is canon

  • @a_Lemming
    @a_Lemming 5 років тому +309

    Boss, you killed a child!
    AMAZING! MISSION COMPLETE!
    THAT RIGHT THERE IS WHY YOU’RE THE BEST, BOSS!!

  • @tume7473
    @tume7473 5 років тому +189

    A Glorious Guide on How to Raise a Child*

  • @tearex3485
    @tearex3485 5 років тому +172

    I WANT THE BAYBEEEE

  • @clearly5558
    @clearly5558 5 років тому +85

    The king of ghoulish goons has returned. All is well

  • @stal2496
    @stal2496 5 років тому +79

    The point is
    The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell

    • @honeyjar2970
      @honeyjar2970 5 років тому

      OMG you're rIgHT!! I never thought of it tHAT wAY! This will resolve all of the problems anyone had playing this game!! Everyone should read this life hack!!!1! Wow!!,,!,,,!!!

  • @7xa4
    @7xa4 5 років тому +145

    I like the new league of legends update

  • @mikedeloughry7530
    @mikedeloughry7530 5 років тому +48

    I want you to raise me as your child.

  • @openg739
    @openg739 5 років тому +9

    This game is EXACTLY like raising a child in real life.
    For realsies
    10/10

  • @tardersauce3578
    @tardersauce3578 5 років тому +4

    A... a video game play through? I never thought I would see this again for at least another four years.

  • @mccoolret
    @mccoolret 5 років тому +12

    *OH NO , HE HAS THE BABY...IMPOSSIBLE*

  • @nielsb.rasmussen2346
    @nielsb.rasmussen2346 5 років тому +76

    You are one of the funniest and inspirational lol youtuber i know... You're the reason why I carry my friends ❤️

    • @toreq1127
      @toreq1127 5 років тому +1

      subsicribe to t series

    • @vieryk3585
      @vieryk3585 5 років тому +1

      @@toreq1127 I'm guessing you're the friend he carries?

    • @etherdeef4303
      @etherdeef4303 5 років тому

      Nillerbae hey can you sign my petition?

    • @vron-re6oi
      @vron-re6oi 5 років тому

      STOP

  • @swordsmenjay
    @swordsmenjay 5 років тому +18

    Darkk Man, you’ve gotta stop piledriving my funny bone like this
    It has feelings too lolol
    (Btw really enjoyed this)

  • @thekingofston7591
    @thekingofston7591 5 років тому +7

    HE HAS BLESSED US WITH VIDEO THANK YOU DEAR LORD

  • @ghjkop7819
    @ghjkop7819 5 років тому +5

    a galactic god takeing care of a child
    cool

  • @refrigerator67
    @refrigerator67 5 років тому +18

    *Throw American cheese on it*
    Why do people do that????

  • @hurricanex3142
    @hurricanex3142 5 років тому +3

    Starts episode and immediately theres an old episode reference.

  • @Slasher9485
    @Slasher9485 5 років тому +7

    "Allow me to consume this literal drug in order to go against my body's natural cycles. CHILDREN ARE A GIFT!"
    In other words, reason #1 to never become a parent.

  • @MarcellDavisVEVO
    @MarcellDavisVEVO 5 років тому +6

    Lol, yesterday i watched a few Darkk Mane Videos and thought: This guy should again upload something.
    Here we are lul!

  • @mysticmyth9036
    @mysticmyth9036 5 років тому +12

    YUSSSSS THANK YOU FOR GRACING US WITH YOUR CONTENT

  • @dilophosaurussk4333
    @dilophosaurussk4333 4 роки тому +1

    What you will need to buy: 2 clay pots, salt, a stone of black onyx for each child you intend to raise.
    Step 1: Make a pact with some higher being, preferrably a Celestial since those will not screw you over, but since those are very rare you can settle for a powerful Lich or demon (Not devil, remember that. NOT DEVIL) In the demon case you will find the manual on how to summon one on page 666 of your textbook.
    Step 2: Go to a graveyard and scoop up some dirt.
    Step 3: Put the dirt in a clay pot.
    Step 4: Put salt in the other clay pot.
    Step 5: Fill the salt-filled clay pot with freshwater.
    Step 6: Find the child/ren you intend to raise.
    Step 7: Wait until it is night.
    Step 8: Mix the two clay pots contents.
    Step 9: Put the black onyx into the pot (Add another stone for each child if you wish to raise more children).
    Step 10: Chant the following: Aistadeaa Hic Ypirétis Li Plusomo
    Step 11: Spill the contents of the pot on the child/ren you wish to raise.
    Step 12: Done.
    *Note: In order for the child/ren to not die within the next 24 hours you must repeat this process every 24 hours or so.

  • @raf3262
    @raf3262 5 років тому +13

    NO! I want the baby I want it, the judge wants the baby he wants it.

  • @nightmareonfriday1334
    @nightmareonfriday1334 5 років тому +5

    *G I V E M E T H E B A B Y I W A N T T H E B A B Y*

  • @hiimalin8873
    @hiimalin8873 5 років тому +19

    Bottle.
    Yes?
    Mother’s finnaly reached it, hasn‘t she?
    Yes.
    Honestly. What an unbelievable Guy!
    That form...That glow..
    that indeed is the complete..
    ULTRA MOTHER
    Dog i started laughing so loud at 3 am, you are 4real the best Entertainer on UA-cam. Greetings from Germany and Universe 7

  • @condorrish123
    @condorrish123 5 років тому +85

    Darkk mom
    Worst mom since 1898

  • @ahmedjagirdar2773
    @ahmedjagirdar2773 5 років тому +1

    Damn I loved this vid especially that last part where the Babey speaks all Japanese 🤣🤣

  • @jellybingey2850
    @jellybingey2850 5 років тому

    I legit screamed in terror when I saw the title of this video knowing Darkk Mane

  • @lavemochaves6500
    @lavemochaves6500 5 років тому

    Instructions unclear, ended up raising a ghoul.

  • @rickyroopnarine137
    @rickyroopnarine137 5 років тому +1

    Couldn't raise a child better than that

  • @pickinoneishard4998
    @pickinoneishard4998 5 років тому

    Step 1: Meet the baby
    Step 2: YEET THE BABY

  • @TeamGentlementlemen
    @TeamGentlementlemen 4 роки тому +1

    This is my favorite condom commercial.

  • @adliarindra
    @adliarindra 5 років тому

    Holy fuck i literally scream when i scroll over my subscribtion page and see this new gold

  • @kingrocky7519
    @kingrocky7519 5 років тому +2

    I was scared for a second.
    The world is not ready for Darkk Mane to reproduce, lest we want his offspring to take the form of an Eldritch God and doom us all to hell...

  • @whatnot7453
    @whatnot7453 5 років тому

    i died at the waterboarding

  • @heftysoup7313
    @heftysoup7313 5 років тому

    I was not expecting that ending lmao

  • @csorigeri
    @csorigeri 5 років тому

    Is there no end to your hubris?
    I will have to implement that sentence into my daily life.

  • @loganburntitus6948
    @loganburntitus6948 2 роки тому

    omfg howd i miss that originally?! He just fucking waterboarded a baby! omfg

  • @ahmadaimam
    @ahmadaimam 5 років тому +10

    REUPLOAD THE RED ROSES TOO VIDEO PLEASE

    • @PaulBlaise
      @PaulBlaise 5 років тому +1

      It was removed from YT due to copyright. He put it back on Google drive, here: drive.google.com/file/d/0B6TciDoYStCSSFJqem9MVmRURTQ/view
      Original tweet : twitter.com/DarkkManeiac/status/828349286643404800

  • @akaliramen279
    @akaliramen279 5 років тому +1

    Parent of the year right there

  • @georgexatz4162
    @georgexatz4162 5 років тому +4

    "Baby you sonofabitch"
    Oh *wait !*

  • @panpsalt6757
    @panpsalt6757 5 років тому

    A Glorious guide on how to raise a child.

  • @NoobCakeHunterD
    @NoobCakeHunterD 5 років тому

    Mission failed. We'll get 'em next time.

  • @Runawaydev1l
    @Runawaydev1l 5 років тому +1

    2:37 "In theaters this Friday" on 2/29/2018....
    That was 1 year and 2 weeks ago

    • @bradenswan2882
      @bradenswan2882 5 років тому

      There also isn't a leapyear in 2018

    • @Runawaydev1l
      @Runawaydev1l 5 років тому

      @@bradenswan2882 So you're telling me that "Parenting" wasn't actually ever going to be in theaters?
      But why would Nithan lie

  • @jordanrettich5999
    @jordanrettich5999 5 років тому

    3:31 okay darkkmane im watching stop-- stop harass-- STOP HARASSING ME

  • @Mastro311
    @Mastro311 5 років тому

    His comedy is soooo fucking good

  • @mr_jalapeno_ancient
    @mr_jalapeno_ancient 5 років тому

    ''Insert it in to the child''

  • @LZHU012
    @LZHU012 5 років тому +3

    I must go beyond my current self...
    Tell me, Baby, have you ever heard these words before?
    *P L U S U L T R A*

  • @grantmorgan5180
    @grantmorgan5180 5 років тому

    The quality content I subscribed for.

  • @Magicarpas
    @Magicarpas 5 років тому

    That awesome edit. *ULTRA MOTHER*

  • @tianliang1230
    @tianliang1230 5 років тому +1

    "you son of the bitch"
    oh wait i'm his mom

  • @FourEyesGod
    @FourEyesGod 5 років тому +1

    "condoms they are cheap as shit" NO TRUER WORDS WERE EVER SPOKEN" ALL HAIL DARK MOM!!!

  • @foofpilled
    @foofpilled 5 років тому

    Respect to all the mothers out there who have to fend off aliens from abducting their babies every day

  • @sleeeeeeepingLoL
    @sleeeeeeepingLoL 5 років тому

    FEED HIM THE SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

  • @matthijsnorg9281
    @matthijsnorg9281 5 років тому

    What a glorious guide!

  • @yayothejowen2541
    @yayothejowen2541 5 років тому

    I think I remember why I'm shit in life rn is because I too, when I was a child was thrown in a trashcan filled with my creation. I think I kinda fused my being with my shit... You know, since I had to eat it to survive since my parents left me there for a couple months...

  • @megama5183
    @megama5183 5 років тому +1

    Yes please just what I needed

  • @votebot3914
    @votebot3914 5 років тому

    he got the baby the lawyer want thhe baby i want the baby the court want the baby but you got da baby

  • @jamesmccarthy9056
    @jamesmccarthy9056 4 роки тому +1

    Clicked on this out of curiousity, skipped neatly to "Now the baby will suffocate to death."

  • @neintails6459
    @neintails6459 5 років тому +1

    "WHERE IS THE TOY ROOM YOU VIBRATING SON OF A BITCH?"
    -Darkk Uka-san 2k19

  • @captcha303
    @captcha303 5 років тому

    *Gets the formula*
    Can't put the formula.

  • @cigxhang486
    @cigxhang486 4 роки тому +1

    it's so hard to be a single mom
    when I'm a teenage boy with no kids
    (read it from someone else lol)

  • @Zandor
    @Zandor 5 років тому +2

    Darkk. I just had an exam that went to shit but you just made me forget about that shit and laugh again. I love you my bro

  • @wixolotus8287
    @wixolotus8287 5 років тому

    calling a child "son of a bitch" in a game where you're the mother

  • @m.muradbasic4186
    @m.muradbasic4186 5 років тому +1

    Wait, if Darkkmane calls his own baby a son of a bitch...

  • @alexissahbazidis2592
    @alexissahbazidis2592 5 років тому

    best condom commercial i have ever watched

  • @1nstant459
    @1nstant459 5 років тому +1

    If you don't hit 1 mil subs by the end of 2019 Jamie will come back and eat the sun

  • @ΑγγελοςΑβραμιδης-ε1κ

    Darkk Mane: How to raise a child
    Me: Wait that's illegal....

  • @GavinY-nn5zd
    @GavinY-nn5zd 5 років тому +4

    WHERE
    IS
    THE
    TOY
    ROOOOMMMMM

  • @davidbalogh4388
    @davidbalogh4388 5 років тому +1

    If u'd uploaded more videos Hungary would be a fully democratic country

  • @RadishHead7
    @RadishHead7 5 років тому

    This made my day
    Nice mama instinct

  • @Roonicorn99
    @Roonicorn99 5 років тому

    The baby wants _cheesecake_

  • @daj4883
    @daj4883 5 років тому

    Play Warframe, finish the limbos theorem quest, equip limbo, (make sure to equip his noble animation), stand in place for about 5-7 seconds,
    and be a gentlemen across every plane of existence.

  • @adamscajuste7468
    @adamscajuste7468 5 років тому

    Man don't you just hate it when aliens try to abduct your baby cause I sure do

  • @raiiuu4915
    @raiiuu4915 5 років тому +2

    Even the completed Ultra Mother couldn't handle THE BABY at the end

  • @pandabon2269
    @pandabon2269 5 років тому

    Holy hell! A sequel to the masterpiece Space Jam?!

  • @theshadynorwegian6036
    @theshadynorwegian6036 5 років тому

    this is pretty accurate with the exception that in real life, you don't get those convenient little bubbles.

    • @schmetterling2169
      @schmetterling2169 5 років тому

      Oh jee sherlock you dont say?!

    • @theshadynorwegian6036
      @theshadynorwegian6036 5 років тому

      The comedic element is that a lot of it is realistic with the exceptions of earthquakes and aliens. Instead you get headaches and constant screaming

  • @Ludn1ck
    @Ludn1ck 5 років тому

    Thanks, now i shall raise my child with all the knowledge you gave me

  • @zoroark097
    @zoroark097 5 років тому

    Interrogation scene had me deader than thar fucking baby let me tell you that

  • @punishersky5289
    @punishersky5289 5 років тому

    I liked this video before i watched it. And i was not disappointed.

  • @hulkingelf4957
    @hulkingelf4957 5 років тому +2

    Yeet the baby.
    Baby-"don't yeet the baby."
    YEETUS MAXIMUS

  • @redysss1133
    @redysss1133 5 років тому +1

    You call him many times "son of a bi***" but you are the mother :/

  • @ocalino
    @ocalino 5 років тому +1

    And that's how boss baby became a man

  • @giotuber99
    @giotuber99 5 років тому +1

    *I W A N T T H E B A B Y*

  • @quiteindeed6809
    @quiteindeed6809 5 років тому +1

    Pretty sure you are a nanny in this game.

  • @modesttomato4332
    @modesttomato4332 5 років тому +2

    now this is is the quality content I signed up for, thanks Nithin.

  • @MontecristoGT
    @MontecristoGT 5 років тому

    With the title i thought it was an octodad video

  • @antoniosalas2522
    @antoniosalas2522 5 років тому +1

    fuck
    damn I am the first coment for the first time

  • @untrustingstatue
    @untrustingstatue 5 років тому

    i WaNT thE bABy: The game, the movie, the life.

  • @swoledoge553
    @swoledoge553 5 років тому

    _I want the baby, you want the baby_

  • @justabiscuit1794
    @justabiscuit1794 5 років тому +1

    GIMME THE BABY! I WANT THE... actually nevermind

  • @ifreet9058
    @ifreet9058 5 років тому

    Everyone hide, HE HAS THE BAYBEE!!!!!!!!!1!11!

  • @Lighty121
    @Lighty121 5 років тому +3

    10:17 MIGATTE NO ULTRA MOMI

  • @loganoutlaw5252
    @loganoutlaw5252 4 роки тому +1

    lmfao did he just waterboard a baby?