Hi! I just recently discovered your channel whilst looking for something to crochet along to and I'm just so grateful because I'm so inspired by you - by your art, by the beautiful, beautiful way you film and edit your videos, and by your attitude in general, even when times are tough. I've binged so many of your videos that UA-cam is now showing me ones I've already seen so some I've watched two or three times now, and I can't tell you how much comfort and solace your channel has brought me as a fellow A(u)DHDer at a time when I've also just crossed the 30 mark and have absolutely no idea what my calling is when I want to do all the things while none of them are fiscally feasible on their own. It's so hard being a creative person in a world so focused on money and productivity and through all of that I'm just in awe of you and everything you've been able to achieve. I'm trying not to make this pages long but lastly thank you, thank you, (seriously!) thank you so much for being brave enough to talk about Palestine when not a single one of my long-time favourite creators has. That was actually the first video of yours that I landed on and it made me stay. I'm not Palestinian but I've hardly been able to think of anything else for the past few months and it shouldn't be like this but it means a lot to me when someone who absolutely has the privilege of ignoring it chooses not to. It's felt so isolating and dystopian watching people just act like everything's normal for fear of backlash. Thanks for being a decent human being. ❤
I am 33 and I still don't know what I am doing completely. I know my desires for the final destination but I am open to the journey. I recommend looking at smaller periods of time. What do you want to do, where do you want to be in the next three months. Work back from that final destination and be realistic about where you are now. I have felt stagnant for the past three years and I realized I was waiting for things to get easier. And it never did. Now I am making progress and I am flowing creatively because my mind feels better. I know that now is not easy but neither will the future be. There will always be something but I can choose where to focus and do something with today. Well wishes.
My mum is 50 and disabled and she’s recently had a massive life shift and went back to school and recently started her own business and she’s the most bright and warm and vibrant person I know and she’s so beyond excited, but (and for context I’m about to turn 23 and I am most certainly in a quarter life crisis and have been for a while hahah) we had a little chat over coffee the other day and she was talking about how even when working in art and fashion and travel and acting when she was younger in California and New York etc she’s never felt like she had it all figured out or as though she had a specific goal or life path to follow, she had me in her later 30s in NY purely bc she wanted to and not out of some social obligation of marriage or age or anything and has had a few serious relationships but she’s a fiercely independent woman who refuses to follow a traditional path, but she said the best thing she’s ever done for herself is just allow her life to be fluid and pursue what she wants whenever she wants to, and when it’s time to move on she does. Nothing is permanent, and as long as she remained true to herself and who she was in her core she always just intuitively was able to find things that she loved. Don’t get me wrong life has never been easy for her or us, but she’s always risen out of the ashes like a phoenix unafraid to completely start over and pursue new and interesting parts of herself. I’m obviously biased but she’s my role model and best friend, and she’s taught me a lot. I definitely don’t know where I’m headed or what I’m doing, but I’m going to embrace this part of my life as part of the journey. As a queer, gender non conforming, disabled/mentally ill, poc, who’s been through a lot, I just want to send love and let you know you’re not alone. I know, parasocial relationships and all that, but I’ve been watching your channel and art path for like 6 years, and I don’t think I know you or anything but from one human to another just know your art and kind thoughts have brought a lot of goodness to my life. I relate to you in a lot of ways and I hope that whether we’re brought along on your path or not that you live well :’) you deserve the world and you create beautiful important things. This world, and even my little life, have been made warmer for your presence. May you always live for yourself, whatever that looks like!!!! Best wishes always!!!
It’s so difficult sometimes to feel as though life could possibly be better or be worth living in this late stage capitalist hellscape, to feel as though (I’m a creative as well, I’m not assuming you or anyone else feel this way necessarily but more venting about how I feel anyway) art or anything good in life is worth while with all of the horrible things happening in the world that we individually feel like we have no power over, but it’s worth the fight for a better future. We just can’t give up, and it is worth while. Love and creating art and gardening and singing off key and dancing poorly and reading for fun is being human, it’s our humanity, and even if you don’t capitalize off of it, it’s deeply important. We just do our best and keep trying to do what little things we can to fight for and love our world into being better. We have all the time we need to grow and become and keep doing what’s important… I’m rambling now and I don’t typically leave comments but thank you for creating the space for all of us lovely humans to leave thought for each other here :)))
I totally sympathize with this sentiment of "I want to do so many things that I'll just do nothing because I don't know where to start!!!" haaaa thank you for sharing your thoughts on it.
So I've worked as a professional artist for film / games for a good few years now and how you're feeling is TOTALLY normal. It's REALLY hard to just focus and be disciplined with making art everyday, especially when it becomes your job. I've followed you for a while and watched your videos and honestly on top of all of the other amazing stuff you do I'm honestly in awe of how you have time. Be kind to yourself! I know there's a couple comments here that say think about where you wanna be but I'm gonna offer the absolute opposite advice. Thinking about the future and where you wanna end up is ultimately extremely overwhelming especially when you're already feeling like you need to have everything figured out. I found when I started thinking more about what I can do in the here and now and less about how that'll impact me in the future, I relaxed and things came much more naturally. There is often so much pressure on us being in a certain place at a certain time and actually we forget to enjoy the moment and in fact sometimes the best places we end up are the ones we don't plan for. I lost a dream job at a huge VFX company last year due to layoffs and it forced me into going freelance and although I never planned for it, it has worked out better than I ever expected. Swings and roundabouts! My biggest tip right now is go back to basics and simplify things a bit. I also suffer from the 'wanna do everything' but it's just not realistic and when we accept that, things will be so much easier! I think it's so beneficial for us to sometimes step out of our comfort zone. Perhaps go back to some fundamental classes and have fun with colour theory or perspective etc. again? All of these things will be a good use of your time, whether you feel like you need them or not and you may find you'll come back to what you love with either 1) a new found skill or 2) a better appreciation of what you love. Also joining the 30 club in May and although I'm not feeling quite as stoked, I'm happy that I have found ways to just relax more and not beat myself up quite so much about art and what is expected of me and my future. You got this Cheyenne!
I really relate to this video! I've been in a massive art rut for the past year, mainly with drawing. I sketch here and there, I make other art (ceramics and fiber arts), but drawing was always my Thing. And now, I've backtracked a noticeable amount in my drawing skills, and it's just this cycle of being unhappy with what I'm making, not making any for a while, losing progress, then being even more unhappy. I'm quite a bit younger, but I totally get what you're going through. I have other things that capture my attention and give me my little serotonin and dopamine boosts, so I don't make art as often, and I want to get back to it this year. I want to make stuff and have fun doing it! I also relate to your point at the end of the video, where you talked about stretching yourself too thin. I've got school, work, and ten million hobbies and interests I want to engage in, so then I get overwhelmed, and subsequently take the easy route (watching UA-cam... a lot). Here's to (hopefully) a year of art, and enjoying making it!! ❤
i have to agree that being in your thirties is amazing! i'm excited for you to enter this era! before i turned 30, i was also feeling similar emotions in terms of listlessness, not knowing what to do after my PhD, wondering if i had made the right decision staying so long in school instead of working. it is a weird time, but here i am, two years later, feeling a lot more secure into the things i wanna do. everyone has a different timeline and it's irrealistic for someone in a creative field to adhere to the timeline of more "traditional" jobs.
I turned 32 in November and I feel exactly the same as you. I'm still uncertain, I feel like I should have my life resolved and instead I have a lot of things I'm good at but I don't enjoy it and I don't make money with any of them. I started following you because you love the same things as me, because I feel very identified with you and because I love your personality and your adorable kittens! I am sure that there are many of us who are on this path and we will manage to get ahead! with love from Chile 💖
Wow…the fact that I just got out of therapy yesterday and we talked so much about the importance of “having fun” while making things and then you post this!?!? Oh my goodness I needed this Cheyenne ❤️ it felt so real and genuine to hear this from someone 5 years ahead of where I am. Thank you always for sharing! This is just a little message and a reminder to show that you are helping more ppl than you ever know! ☺️
what helps me is focusing on both exploring and versatility. it makes me feel equipped because i’m in constant learning mode. i ask myself what have i never drawn what are methods i’ve never drawn in? what have i drawn using negative space only and what have i not? what is something i love but never studied visually, what is something i’m interested in learning about? what is something i’d love to see more beauty in? how do i represent a subject in as few lines or shapes as possible? how do i use color in a way that’s unique to my subject? how do i marry my different mediums together? also finger painting really lets u let loose like ur a kid again as well as having a sketchbook where u dump ur “bad art” so the good art can come out afterwards. also pixel art, the limits help and it’s harder to judge a bunch of squares harshly. anyways much love that feeling really sucks so so so much ❤️
I deeply understand this! As someone who has been a freelance artist over a decade, and as someone who discovered and got diagnosed with ADHD a few years back. There's so many challenges we face with ourselves and the outside world. And yeah our art and income being so tied together! I'm in therapy, partly touching on my art/ work anxieties. And recently been spending time on twitch, to find more joy in art, community etc. I'm drawing again, not posting yet. BUT soon! Community and other mediums are helping (knitting and gaming). Hope we can both find our way back to having fun soon! Sending love and compassion
I found myself audibly going "uhu" "mmm ye" for all of what you talked about. You described the feeling of the deep failure feeling connecting to your self-worth with drawing so well. And somehow it's good to hear we're not alone with this feeling. Drawing truly is a scary practice with a deep reward
Really feeling this video .. turning 32 next month, studied design, prefer painting, always loved all sorts of crafts and planning, tried kidlit last year, didn’t work, also tried working in an agency, didn’t work … trying so many things 🫠 I just want to earn enough to sustain myself and do things I like .. 💛
I started doing pottery with an art therapy support group for PTSD probably half a decade ago at this point, and it makes me happy to see you trying it. It's very tactile and therapeutic; I hope it brings you peace. I have a really hard time with the things I do not being perfect and pottery helped me out of that mindset - instead of "if it's not perfect why bother to do it?" and hating myself for not being immediately good at something, it helped me do art for the journey and not the destination, embracing imperfections. For the record, we all struggle with tiny cups! I have made SO MANY cups that I thought would be the right size but ended up being basically espresso cups. Best advice is to weigh your clay and keep track. Best wishes!
Sometimes I honestly feel like I’m listening to my own brain when i listen to your videos 😂 The thing of having too many avenues you want to explore reallllly bothers me everyday, because I feel like guilt for abandoning a different thing I want to do to start a new thing I want to do, but you really have to focus on ones thing at a time to progress in anything and its just ahhhh
I recently turned 30, and I really feel this angst. I did manage to settle on a general trajectory for where I want to move toward, but it’s a daily process to remind myself to take small steps and not allow all my shiny exciting goals to overwhelm me. I’ve been making zines for myself and just stuffing them chock full of every random concept that tries distracting my mind. I have 4 or 5 little zines that are just long lists of ideas, some serious, some absolutely buck naked wild lol. For me, listlessness often has an antidote in making big ol’ lists. 😋
ooooh myyy, you can't imagine how reassuring it is to see somebody else have the same struggles as I do. I'm 31 and I just relate so much to have to many things you wanna do and end up doing none of them 🙈 I started my YT Channel last year to share my art journey (with 30…haha) and I'm also not "there yet" - but really in fact I don't know what that "there" is or will be, I just know that I have the feeling, with 30 I should already be "there" 😅 Sending some love and motivation!! 🤗🧡
Congratulations on almost turning 30! Hope you're able to celebrate and feel proud of how far you've come in the last few years! Feelings about age are always weird. Personally i've never really bought into the 'when you're this age you'll feel this way' thing. It probably has a positive mental effect if it's a good expectation (self fulfilling prophecy and all) but I feel like it has really negatively affected how I've viewed different parts of my life when those expectations are not met. Expectations are everything and not meeting your own expectations or even adopting external expectations as your own can really mess up how you feel about things that you're experiencing. You might be feeling a very normal human emotion but it will feel abnormal if you don't expect to feel it or view it as a sign that something is wrong. At least that's how it works for me. I think I just prefer to not assign too much value to things just because society says I should, especially when doing that doesn't benefit me in any way. It's hard with social pressure and expectations but to me it's worth just trying to take things as they are and accept where I am and what I need in the moment and in the next. Short term flexible planning and seeing where the next month or quarter takes me (as much as I can - kind of need to because of health issues). There's obviously still gonna be disappointment and frustration at listlessness and stagnation, that's a natural part of life. But I find it's a lot easier to deal with when I hold onto social expectations loosely or not at all. My life just is what it is regardless of how it's 'supposed' to be or is for other people my age. My life is already all wrong according to social ideals about how I'm supposed to act and feel and want and experience at my age anyway lol.
I completely understand how you're feeling right now. I'm also going through a crisis with my art and where I'm going in life in most aspects. I'm turning 30 in March and I'm not happy with where I am but I'm trying to work on myself and my art. I watch your videos when they come out and they're always so comforting. I relate to you so much and it's nice to feel like I'm not alone. I hope that we, and everyone else struggling with this, figures it out. I've actually started crocheting as a new medium and it has been fun. I do think it helps creatively, because I was suddenly able to draw something I liked for the first time in a long time. The problem is I also want to create all the things all the time and end up not making anything too! I don't know what I'm meant to do and what I should focus on, but I guess that will come with time.
"I have too many things i want to do and as a result I don't do any of them" Well if that's not my life sumed up in a nice little sentence. I can say at 31, the restlessness hasn't gone away and my ADHD/Depression symtoms are the same as they were before, but I have learned to give myself more grace and I do find it a bit easier to forgive myself and move forward. Cheyenne know that ( at least for me) even durning the times you felt like you were at your lowest, you have always been a consistiant sorce of inspiration !!! You got this !!
Art block is something I can relate too. Especially when I am in similar emotional state of overstimulation in the form of a huge braininspirational of "I want to do this, this this thiiiis and what do I want to do now again? Oooh, here comes 300 more ideas" Having fun is great and a good way to fall back in love with the process. (As you might be able to tell, I do have ADD and Asberger as well so can defenitely relate with the comment in your skillshare promo) Anyway, have you considered that it might be an idea to take out some vacation time for your thirtieeth (early happy bday!), beacause youtubers need some spare time too!
can't wait to see how the mushroom turns out! So funny one of my friends also got invited to submit to that exihibition so i saw snapchats about this random mushroom and then sit down to watch this video and saw yours. so cool. don't forget that your life is so awesome and your stress is getting self created. you don't have to figure it all out just do what brings you joy!
omg i can SO relate to this state of mind, it’s funny how you described exactly all the things I struggle with lately thanks for being so transparent and real indecision is the worst, probably the only thing worse than that is the acceptance of the fact that there is no time to do all you want and have to choose and give up some things, or expectations but i agree that the discipline in daily practice is the road to take and also prioritisation on what you ache most doing is the way to go you’re not alone in this, good luck with your practice, keep at it💋
I'm a year behind you on the road to 30, and every bit of this video resonated to my core - you are not alone! I've started reading The Artist's Way, hoping that will help with a lot of the feelings you are describing. I hope you find that spark and start to have fun
i know this feeling so well! would highly recommend looking into value based decision making and acceptance/comittment (therapy) therapy in brackets, cause while it is a therapy method, ive found it ro work lovely to apply to everyday situations that you wouldnt consider "needing therapy" for. its kind of a method to deal with where you are and healthily work towards where you might be going ^^
I've been watching a lot of Art with Em recently and she posts a lot of really inspiring collage stuff! A lot of her process is just coming up with really fun patterns and textures by just slapping paint on paper and my little ADHD brain looks at it like "hmmmm.... seems fun"
so sorry you're going through this tough period and i hope you sort it out! even though there are so many people who love your art and look up to you, the biggest pressure the artist faces is always from their inner critic, so please go easy on yourself :3
I can't relate to the pressure of having your income solely rely on artmaking but I can assure you as a thirty-something freelance illustrator that it will get better and you don't have to figure it all out at once. For the last six months, I've pretty much only wanted to crochet and had a blast doing it. I'm starting to get more excited about picking my iPad up and drawing again but before that, I was toying around with the idea of tapestry crochet. Maybe that might be a fun bridging of the gap between the two? You can attempt to crochet an illustration or sketch you already love so you won't need to start from scratch. Anyway, just an idea! Godspeed, adventurer! :)
I am at the same things as you, I find very hard to not have sorted things out, I make art to, I draw, I paint and crochet things, but I don't really know if I good on those things. And I don't have a carrer out of this, I feel very insecure about my art and I didn't found other job I could do that I liked. So I trying do open a store online to sell my crochet. And I going to turn 30 in May, very scary D:
been feeling incredibly listless in how to approach art too. feeling the urge but the usual places just don't feel appealing. seeing u going thru similar things and how ur working ur way through it is amazing and immediately jumped on those classes u rec'ed! excited to feel excited by art again!
You have such a natural sense of humor. Maybe use that and start something that is actually expressing the artist angst everyone has to slog through at times. Maybe an angsty artist mushroom throwing a palette against a wall or something. I don’t know. I’m just pondering “the mood”. I am not an artist but I do create crosswords and am trying to breath life into that hobby again. Relatable.
you are not alone on how you feel regarding your career/purpose/passions for a living my work is supporting people like a spiritual mentor/life coach and l have been seeing this same theme from most, including myself, it is like we are all in burn out it feels very like a dark night of the soul episode mixed with ptsd, since 2020 l am not surprised most of us are feeling very different and lost, we had our power taken away and now it is about rebuilding that and reconnecting to it and refinding ourselves....takes time though, one day one step at a time, hugs to you and all that are feeling stuck x
To have fun it's one of the reasons we make art .. it's so nice to watch your videos, the pase, the images, the music, hear your thougts about life... thank you ❤ I often feel insecure about my "art", so give a second chance to some of them, untill they turn alright... also remembered when Shayda Campbell says "perfectly imperfect" ❤
Been rewatching all your videos while I'm I'll and I love your newfound love of knitting. My mom and I used to knit together all the time....I just recently lost her to cancer and I'm having a really rough time. Thank you for all your videos and sharing your interests and struggles with us ❤️❤️
thank u for this chey, really been struggling with creativity in general since therapy treatment and honestly before, but this feels like a warm hug and a "it's okay"
Mushroom dudes are so cute! I have the same issue, I want to do/try so many new things and in the final result, I'm not doing anything. I hope you will find the best way to enjoy the art again.
This may be hard if you're introverted but to get fun back into my art, I had lil art parties. Invite like 2-3 people and hang out and set fun lil themes and constraints and just see what you make. It makes it less of a chore and more of a fun get together.
Literally everything you’ve said is me right now. I even bought an artist block book (didn’t finish that too) I hope the best on your journey of falling in love with art again and enjoying your passion. Keep artin. Also I’ll come check out your live streams when you’re 🔴live next. (The painting was cute too)
you uploaded this at the perfect time. ive been struggling with creating art and getting out of the practice *also* because of my fixation with crochet, and school, and ive just felt so lost. thank you for showing me that im not alone. im gonna go paint something. :]
When I heard you say you're turning 30 in four months, I literally thought; "Congratulations!", life is hard and you make beautiful art in a beautiful home WITH cats, achievements abundance and that's incredible. 🐳
Loved the title, haven't been doing well and felt like I couldn't paint, but I need to remember, I need to have fun, I want to have fun while I create, so let's focus on that :)
You won't have things figured out by then (30) but what did happen, almost instantaneously when you hit 30, is you stop caring about lots of things - you may stop caring about what someone else thinks, you stop letting perfect be the enemy of good enough, you stop agonising over every little decision. You stop getting so hung up on the mistakes. But you stop all of those things at 30 because you reach the time of your life even other things become a big deal. You'll likely lose grandparents and older loved ones. You're parents generation start getting sick, you stable friend break up or have kids and you'll hear that some people you went to school with have died. You stop caring about the little things (that may not feel little in your 20s) because you don't have the time of energy to. I'm generalising if course, but there is a definite shift.
I am similarly listless, aimless, going nowhere, and spent the last 25 years impatiently waiting for the clock to run down, and yet I still think 30s are superior! 😁 Look forward to it
I don't know how, why, or what sorcery is this but I AM FEELING THE EXACT SAME WAY, and it is not fun... I'm literally just waiting and hoping for this period to pass. lol, much love and stay strong hugs >:D
so crazy how relatable this video was to me! , like almost everything you said sounded like the thoughts in my own head 😅. As I'm 24, I'm a recent fine art graduate, I very much so miss my studio space where I could paint huge canvas and draw and experiment happily. Now I only have my flat where i dont have much space, or the motivation to create like i used to. Also very much concerned with what my 'practice' is because I feel like I had some idea in university but now I mostly make art in my sketchbook but its not really a 'practice' , dido also on not knowing what my next steps are in my artist journey... I wish you good luck in your 30s and hopefully you will once again find the joy in the art of creation! 💫🤎🌞
3:39 maybe go the ipad first so you have the option to go back a few steps but try not to and find the joy there then after having done that go to paper :)
For me I rake it as before tge answers come to you amd they will this what all you are feeling is that very process I have no doubt that good things are coming for you ❤
Turning 30 is very special! Plan a party of your favorites past, present, and future. Thanks for sharing your thoughts about your creativity. You might want to read _Notebooks of the Mind_ which is a study of creative giants and how they met with their creativity. Also _Creative Collaboration_ is a good one too, both are by Vera John Steiner. These are texts are from creativity studies so the writing is academic, but you don't have to read all of the text, just flip pages and scan through it and read the parts that resonate for you, kind of like girl snack dinners!
Omg not me drawing on my ipad while this video is on the tv and a few minutes before I was thinking this is a boring drawing, just a leopard and a lotus flower but whatever it is pretty, and then you were like this is boring haha 😅
Have you tried doing some DTIYS challenges? Just dl a bunch of illustrations and try drawing other people’s characters. You don’t have to stress with coming up with a concept or worry about finishing the final art piece cause it’s not something that you can monetize. It’s freeing drawing a bunch of stuff outside your comfort zone. Just a suggestion 😊
30 lol...im about to turn 50...and i feel the same with my artwork and music lately..50 is a hard one...looking back..regrets...😮 wish i could go back to 30..just saying 😊
I would not choose another studio. But a house with an extra room to be only a studio. And the rest a home. Alltogether? Too overwelming. Also, you get an idea of you you trully are, after 40. Trust me. Play until then. Have fun
HI, I also am in the creative field! I actually really like watching you because I own my own business and am in theater! I go to virtual body doubling, it's called spacetime monotasking. and it has helped me be a little more"practiced" with my work. I hope it helps you too!
"I'm trying so hard to have fun." Has to me the most relatable sentence ever, just sums up adulthood 😅
Same 😅😅
Hi! I just recently discovered your channel whilst looking for something to crochet along to and I'm just so grateful because I'm so inspired by you - by your art, by the beautiful, beautiful way you film and edit your videos, and by your attitude in general, even when times are tough. I've binged so many of your videos that UA-cam is now showing me ones I've already seen so some I've watched two or three times now, and I can't tell you how much comfort and solace your channel has brought me as a fellow A(u)DHDer at a time when I've also just crossed the 30 mark and have absolutely no idea what my calling is when I want to do all the things while none of them are fiscally feasible on their own. It's so hard being a creative person in a world so focused on money and productivity and through all of that I'm just in awe of you and everything you've been able to achieve. I'm trying not to make this pages long but lastly thank you, thank you, (seriously!) thank you so much for being brave enough to talk about Palestine when not a single one of my long-time favourite creators has. That was actually the first video of yours that I landed on and it made me stay. I'm not Palestinian but I've hardly been able to think of anything else for the past few months and it shouldn't be like this but it means a lot to me when someone who absolutely has the privilege of ignoring it chooses not to. It's felt so isolating and dystopian watching people just act like everything's normal for fear of backlash. Thanks for being a decent human being. ❤
I am 33 and I still don't know what I am doing completely. I know my desires for the final destination but I am open to the journey. I recommend looking at smaller periods of time. What do you want to do, where do you want to be in the next three months. Work back from that final destination and be realistic about where you are now. I have felt stagnant for the past three years and I realized I was waiting for things to get easier. And it never did. Now I am making progress and I am flowing creatively because my mind feels better. I know that now is not easy but neither will the future be. There will always be something but I can choose where to focus and do something with today. Well wishes.
My mum is 50 and disabled and she’s recently had a massive life shift and went back to school and recently started her own business and she’s the most bright and warm and vibrant person I know and she’s so beyond excited, but (and for context I’m about to turn 23 and I am most certainly in a quarter life crisis and have been for a while hahah) we had a little chat over coffee the other day and she was talking about how even when working in art and fashion and travel and acting when she was younger in California and New York etc she’s never felt like she had it all figured out or as though she had a specific goal or life path to follow, she had me in her later 30s in NY purely bc she wanted to and not out of some social obligation of marriage or age or anything and has had a few serious relationships but she’s a fiercely independent woman who refuses to follow a traditional path, but she said the best thing she’s ever done for herself is just allow her life to be fluid and pursue what she wants whenever she wants to, and when it’s time to move on she does. Nothing is permanent, and as long as she remained true to herself and who she was in her core she always just intuitively was able to find things that she loved. Don’t get me wrong life has never been easy for her or us, but she’s always risen out of the ashes like a phoenix unafraid to completely start over and pursue new and interesting parts of herself. I’m obviously biased but she’s my role model and best friend, and she’s taught me a lot. I definitely don’t know where I’m headed or what I’m doing, but I’m going to embrace this part of my life as part of the journey. As a queer, gender non conforming, disabled/mentally ill, poc, who’s been through a lot, I just want to send love and let you know you’re not alone. I know, parasocial relationships and all that, but I’ve been watching your channel and art path for like 6 years, and I don’t think I know you or anything but from one human to another just know your art and kind thoughts have brought a lot of goodness to my life. I relate to you in a lot of ways and I hope that whether we’re brought along on your path or not that you live well :’) you deserve the world and you create beautiful important things. This world, and even my little life, have been made warmer for your presence. May you always live for yourself, whatever that looks like!!!! Best wishes always!!!
It’s so difficult sometimes to feel as though life could possibly be better or be worth living in this late stage capitalist hellscape, to feel as though (I’m a creative as well, I’m not assuming you or anyone else feel this way necessarily but more venting about how I feel anyway) art or anything good in life is worth while with all of the horrible things happening in the world that we individually feel like we have no power over, but it’s worth the fight for a better future. We just can’t give up, and it is worth while. Love and creating art and gardening and singing off key and dancing poorly and reading for fun is being human, it’s our humanity, and even if you don’t capitalize off of it, it’s deeply important. We just do our best and keep trying to do what little things we can to fight for and love our world into being better. We have all the time we need to grow and become and keep doing what’s important… I’m rambling now and I don’t typically leave comments but thank you for creating the space for all of us lovely humans to leave thought for each other here :)))
I totally sympathize with this sentiment of "I want to do so many things that I'll just do nothing because I don't know where to start!!!" haaaa thank you for sharing your thoughts on it.
So I've worked as a professional artist for film / games for a good few years now and how you're feeling is TOTALLY normal. It's REALLY hard to just focus and be disciplined with making art everyday, especially when it becomes your job. I've followed you for a while and watched your videos and honestly on top of all of the other amazing stuff you do I'm honestly in awe of how you have time. Be kind to yourself!
I know there's a couple comments here that say think about where you wanna be but I'm gonna offer the absolute opposite advice. Thinking about the future and where you wanna end up is ultimately extremely overwhelming especially when you're already feeling like you need to have everything figured out. I found when I started thinking more about what I can do in the here and now and less about how that'll impact me in the future, I relaxed and things came much more naturally. There is often so much pressure on us being in a certain place at a certain time and actually we forget to enjoy the moment and in fact sometimes the best places we end up are the ones we don't plan for. I lost a dream job at a huge VFX company last year due to layoffs and it forced me into going freelance and although I never planned for it, it has worked out better than I ever expected. Swings and roundabouts!
My biggest tip right now is go back to basics and simplify things a bit. I also suffer from the 'wanna do everything' but it's just not realistic and when we accept that, things will be so much easier! I think it's so beneficial for us to sometimes step out of our comfort zone. Perhaps go back to some fundamental classes and have fun with colour theory or perspective etc. again? All of these things will be a good use of your time, whether you feel like you need them or not and you may find you'll come back to what you love with either 1) a new found skill or 2) a better appreciation of what you love.
Also joining the 30 club in May and although I'm not feeling quite as stoked, I'm happy that I have found ways to just relax more and not beat myself up quite so much about art and what is expected of me and my future. You got this Cheyenne!
I really relate to this video! I've been in a massive art rut for the past year, mainly with drawing. I sketch here and there, I make other art (ceramics and fiber arts), but drawing was always my Thing. And now, I've backtracked a noticeable amount in my drawing skills, and it's just this cycle of being unhappy with what I'm making, not making any for a while, losing progress, then being even more unhappy. I'm quite a bit younger, but I totally get what you're going through. I have other things that capture my attention and give me my little serotonin and dopamine boosts, so I don't make art as often, and I want to get back to it this year. I want to make stuff and have fun doing it! I also relate to your point at the end of the video, where you talked about stretching yourself too thin. I've got school, work, and ten million hobbies and interests I want to engage in, so then I get overwhelmed, and subsequently take the easy route (watching UA-cam... a lot). Here's to (hopefully) a year of art, and enjoying making it!! ❤
i have to agree that being in your thirties is amazing! i'm excited for you to enter this era! before i turned 30, i was also feeling similar emotions in terms of listlessness, not knowing what to do after my PhD, wondering if i had made the right decision staying so long in school instead of working. it is a weird time, but here i am, two years later, feeling a lot more secure into the things i wanna do. everyone has a different timeline and it's irrealistic for someone in a creative field to adhere to the timeline of more "traditional" jobs.
I turned 32 in November and I feel exactly the same as you. I'm still uncertain, I feel like I should have my life resolved and instead I have a lot of things I'm good at but I don't enjoy it and I don't make money with any of them. I started following you because you love the same things as me, because I feel very identified with you and because I love your personality and your adorable kittens! I am sure that there are many of us who are on this path and we will manage to get ahead! with love from Chile 💖
Wow…the fact that I just got out of therapy yesterday and we talked so much about the importance of “having fun” while making things and then you post this!?!? Oh my goodness I needed this Cheyenne ❤️ it felt so real and genuine to hear this from someone 5 years ahead of where I am. Thank you always for sharing! This is just a little message and a reminder to show that you are helping more ppl than you ever know! ☺️
what helps me is focusing on both exploring and versatility. it makes me feel equipped because i’m in constant learning mode. i ask myself what have i never drawn what are methods i’ve never drawn in? what have i drawn using negative space only and what have i not? what is something i love but never studied visually, what is something i’m interested in learning about? what is something i’d love to see more beauty in? how do i represent a subject in as few lines or shapes as possible? how do i use color in a way that’s unique to my subject? how do i marry my different mediums together? also finger painting really lets u let loose like ur a kid again as well as having a sketchbook where u dump ur “bad art” so the good art can come out afterwards. also pixel art, the limits help and it’s harder to judge a bunch of squares harshly. anyways much love that feeling really sucks so so so much ❤️
I deeply understand this! As someone who has been a freelance artist over a decade, and as someone who discovered and got diagnosed with ADHD a few years back. There's so many challenges we face with ourselves and the outside world. And yeah our art and income being so tied together! I'm in therapy, partly touching on my art/ work anxieties. And recently been spending time on twitch, to find more joy in art, community etc. I'm drawing again, not posting yet. BUT soon! Community and other mediums are helping (knitting and gaming). Hope we can both find our way back to having fun soon! Sending love and compassion
I found myself audibly going "uhu" "mmm ye" for all of what you talked about. You described the feeling of the deep failure feeling connecting to your self-worth with drawing so well. And somehow it's good to hear we're not alone with this feeling. Drawing truly is a scary practice with a deep reward
Really feeling this video .. turning 32 next month, studied design, prefer painting, always loved all sorts of crafts and planning, tried kidlit last year, didn’t work, also tried working in an agency, didn’t work … trying so many things 🫠 I just want to earn enough to sustain myself and do things I like .. 💛
I started doing pottery with an art therapy support group for PTSD probably half a decade ago at this point, and it makes me happy to see you trying it. It's very tactile and therapeutic; I hope it brings you peace. I have a really hard time with the things I do not being perfect and pottery helped me out of that mindset - instead of "if it's not perfect why bother to do it?" and hating myself for not being immediately good at something, it helped me do art for the journey and not the destination, embracing imperfections. For the record, we all struggle with tiny cups! I have made SO MANY cups that I thought would be the right size but ended up being basically espresso cups. Best advice is to weigh your clay and keep track. Best wishes!
Sometimes I honestly feel like I’m listening to my own brain when i listen to your videos 😂 The thing of having too many avenues you want to explore reallllly bothers me everyday, because I feel like guilt for abandoning a different thing I want to do to start a new thing I want to do, but you really have to focus on ones thing at a time to progress in anything and its just ahhhh
i love the soft realness you exude
I recently turned 30, and I really feel this angst. I did manage to settle on a general trajectory for where I want to move toward, but it’s a daily process to remind myself to take small steps and not allow all my shiny exciting goals to overwhelm me.
I’ve been making zines for myself and just stuffing them chock full of every random concept that tries distracting my mind. I have 4 or 5 little zines that are just long lists of ideas, some serious, some absolutely buck naked wild lol. For me, listlessness often has an antidote in making big ol’ lists. 😋
ooooh myyy, you can't imagine how reassuring it is to see somebody else have the same struggles as I do. I'm 31 and I just relate so much to have to many things you wanna do and end up doing none of them 🙈 I started my YT Channel last year to share my art journey (with 30…haha) and I'm also not "there yet" - but really in fact I don't know what that "there" is or will be, I just know that I have the feeling, with 30 I should already be "there" 😅 Sending some love and motivation!! 🤗🧡
Congratulations on almost turning 30! Hope you're able to celebrate and feel proud of how far you've come in the last few years!
Feelings about age are always weird. Personally i've never really bought into the 'when you're this age you'll feel this way' thing. It probably has a positive mental effect if it's a good expectation (self fulfilling prophecy and all) but I feel like it has really negatively affected how I've viewed different parts of my life when those expectations are not met.
Expectations are everything and not meeting your own expectations or even adopting external expectations as your own can really mess up how you feel about things that you're experiencing. You might be feeling a very normal human emotion but it will feel abnormal if you don't expect to feel it or view it as a sign that something is wrong. At least that's how it works for me. I think I just prefer to not assign too much value to things just because society says I should, especially when doing that doesn't benefit me in any way. It's hard with social pressure and expectations but to me it's worth just trying to take things as they are and accept where I am and what I need in the moment and in the next. Short term flexible planning and seeing where the next month or quarter takes me (as much as I can - kind of need to because of health issues).
There's obviously still gonna be disappointment and frustration at listlessness and stagnation, that's a natural part of life. But I find it's a lot easier to deal with when I hold onto social expectations loosely or not at all. My life just is what it is regardless of how it's 'supposed' to be or is for other people my age.
My life is already all wrong according to social ideals about how I'm supposed to act and feel and want and experience at my age anyway lol.
this video is huge pingu making valentines cards energy
I completely understand how you're feeling right now. I'm also going through a crisis with my art and where I'm going in life in most aspects. I'm turning 30 in March and I'm not happy with where I am but I'm trying to work on myself and my art. I watch your videos when they come out and they're always so comforting. I relate to you so much and it's nice to feel like I'm not alone. I hope that we, and everyone else struggling with this, figures it out. I've actually started crocheting as a new medium and it has been fun. I do think it helps creatively, because I was suddenly able to draw something I liked for the first time in a long time. The problem is I also want to create all the things all the time and end up not making anything too! I don't know what I'm meant to do and what I should focus on, but I guess that will come with time.
"I have too many things i want to do and as a result I don't do any of them" Well if that's not my life sumed up in a nice little sentence. I can say at 31, the restlessness hasn't gone away and my ADHD/Depression symtoms are the same as they were before, but I have learned to give myself more grace and I do find it a bit easier to forgive myself and move forward. Cheyenne know that ( at least for me) even durning the times you felt like you were at your lowest, you have always been a consistiant sorce of inspiration !!! You got this !!
I just had an interview for an illustrator job and my body is still in flight or fight. This is the relaxing content I need
Actually this is a lot of the stuff I’m struggling with so I was like damn 😭
Art block is something I can relate too. Especially when I am in similar emotional state of overstimulation in the form of a huge braininspirational of "I want to do this, this this thiiiis and what do I want to do now again? Oooh, here comes 300 more ideas"
Having fun is great and a good way to fall back in love with the process. (As you might be able to tell, I do have ADD and Asberger as well so can defenitely relate with the comment in your skillshare promo)
Anyway, have you considered that it might be an idea to take out some vacation time for your thirtieeth (early happy bday!), beacause youtubers need some spare time too!
can't wait to see how the mushroom turns out! So funny one of my friends also got invited to submit to that exihibition so i saw snapchats about this random mushroom and then sit down to watch this video and saw yours. so cool. don't forget that your life is so awesome and your stress is getting self created. you don't have to figure it all out just do what brings you joy!
omg i can SO relate to this state of mind, it’s funny how you described exactly all the things I struggle with lately
thanks for being so transparent and real
indecision is the worst, probably the only thing worse than that is the acceptance of the fact that there is no time to do all you want and have to choose and give up some things, or expectations
but i agree that the discipline in daily practice is the road to take and also prioritisation on what you ache most doing is the way to go
you’re not alone in this, good luck with your practice, keep at it💋
I'm a year behind you on the road to 30, and every bit of this video resonated to my core - you are not alone!
I've started reading The Artist's Way, hoping that will help with a lot of the feelings you are describing. I hope you find that spark and start to have fun
i know this feeling so well! would highly recommend looking into value based decision making and acceptance/comittment (therapy)
therapy in brackets, cause while it is a therapy method, ive found it ro work lovely to apply to everyday situations that you wouldnt consider "needing therapy" for. its kind of a method to deal with where you are and healthily work towards where you might be going ^^
I've been watching a lot of Art with Em recently and she posts a lot of really inspiring collage stuff! A lot of her process is just coming up with really fun patterns and textures by just slapping paint on paper and my little ADHD brain looks at it like "hmmmm.... seems fun"
so sorry you're going through this tough period and i hope you sort it out! even though there are so many people who love your art and look up to you, the biggest pressure the artist faces is always from their inner critic, so please go easy on yourself :3
I can't relate to the pressure of having your income solely rely on artmaking but I can assure you as a thirty-something freelance illustrator that it will get better and you don't have to figure it all out at once. For the last six months, I've pretty much only wanted to crochet and had a blast doing it. I'm starting to get more excited about picking my iPad up and drawing again but before that, I was toying around with the idea of tapestry crochet. Maybe that might be a fun bridging of the gap between the two? You can attempt to crochet an illustration or sketch you already love so you won't need to start from scratch. Anyway, just an idea! Godspeed, adventurer! :)
I STILL love that dark blue against the pink in the painting 🙂 and you're doing ✨awesome ✨ just doing what you do Chey.
Watching you work with clay is so nostalgic; I discovered your channel through your clay pins video way back when and it's just such a cozy medium :3
Love the chill relaxed vibes...im stuck in an art frump also..and for my music also...ahhhhhhh
3:55 I feel this! It's so true and I can relate.
I am at the same things as you, I find very hard to not have sorted things out, I make art to, I draw, I paint and crochet things, but I don't really know if I good on those things. And I don't have a carrer out of this, I feel very insecure about my art and I didn't found other job I could do that I liked. So I trying do open a store online to sell my crochet. And I going to turn 30 in May, very scary D:
been feeling incredibly listless in how to approach art too. feeling the urge but the usual places just don't feel appealing. seeing u going thru similar things and how ur working ur way through it is amazing and immediately jumped on those classes u rec'ed! excited to feel excited by art again!
You have such a natural sense of humor. Maybe use that and start something that is actually expressing the artist angst everyone has to slog through at times. Maybe an angsty artist mushroom throwing a palette against a wall or something. I don’t know. I’m just pondering “the mood”. I am not an artist but I do create crosswords and am trying to breath life into that hobby again. Relatable.
you are not alone on how you feel regarding your career/purpose/passions for a living my work is supporting people like a spiritual mentor/life coach and l have been seeing this same theme from most, including myself, it is like we are all in burn out it feels very like a dark night of the soul episode mixed with ptsd, since 2020 l am not surprised most of us are feeling very different and lost, we had our power taken away and now it is about rebuilding that and reconnecting to it and refinding ourselves....takes time though, one day one step at a time, hugs to you and all that are feeling stuck x
I love the way you've filmed this, it's so cosy 🥰
To have fun it's one of the reasons we make art ..
it's so nice to watch your videos, the pase, the images, the music, hear your thougts about life... thank you ❤
I often feel insecure about my "art", so give a second chance to some of them, untill they turn alright... also remembered when Shayda Campbell says "perfectly imperfect"
❤
Im so happy to have found your channel! I feel like i am in the same boat and can totally relate!
Thanks for sharing your life with us x cant wait to see the finished mushroom. And I completely relate to the imposter syndrome!
"I have to many things that I want to do, and as a result I do any of them" ME! This has been me this past year, and it is tough.
Ooh! Your mug (and teapot) are both so beautiful, adorable and sweet
Been rewatching all your videos while I'm I'll and I love your newfound love of knitting. My mom and I used to knit together all the time....I just recently lost her to cancer and I'm having a really rough time. Thank you for all your videos and sharing your interests and struggles with us ❤️❤️
Cheyenne you’re just so real for this
thank u for this chey, really been struggling with creativity in general since therapy treatment and honestly before, but this feels like a warm hug and a "it's okay"
Mushroom dudes are so cute! I have the same issue, I want to do/try so many new things and in the final result, I'm not doing anything. I hope you will find the best way to enjoy the art again.
This may be hard if you're introverted but to get fun back into my art, I had lil art parties. Invite like 2-3 people and hang out and set fun lil themes and constraints and just see what you make. It makes it less of a chore and more of a fun get together.
Literally everything you’ve said is me right now. I even bought an artist block book (didn’t finish that too)
I hope the best on your journey of falling in love with art again and enjoying your passion.
Keep artin.
Also I’ll come check out your live streams when you’re 🔴live next.
(The painting was cute too)
you uploaded this at the perfect time. ive been struggling with creating art and getting out of the practice *also* because of my fixation with crochet, and school, and ive just felt so lost. thank you for showing me that im not alone. im gonna go paint something. :]
This video was exactly what I needed today
congrats on almost 30! you're not alone, cheers to having fun at all costs :)
I absolutely feel this on a molecular level. I adore the little mushroom dudes!
I love the idea of making the clay figure for the mushroom! So cute! Love your videos so much 💓💓
When I heard you say you're turning 30 in four months, I literally thought; "Congratulations!", life is hard and you make beautiful art in a beautiful home WITH cats, achievements abundance and that's incredible. 🐳
Loved the title, haven't been doing well and felt like I couldn't paint, but I need to remember, I need to have fun, I want to have fun while I create, so let's focus on that :)
You won't have things figured out by then (30) but what did happen, almost instantaneously when you hit 30, is you stop caring about lots of things - you may stop caring about what someone else thinks, you stop letting perfect be the enemy of good enough, you stop agonising over every little decision. You stop getting so hung up on the mistakes. But you stop all of those things at 30 because you reach the time of your life even other things become a big deal. You'll likely lose grandparents and older loved ones. You're parents generation start getting sick, you stable friend break up or have kids and you'll hear that some people you went to school with have died. You stop caring about the little things (that may not feel little in your 20s) because you don't have the time of energy to. I'm generalising if course, but there is a definite shift.
I am similarly listless, aimless, going nowhere, and spent the last 25 years impatiently waiting for the clock to run down, and yet I still think 30s are superior! 😁 Look forward to it
I don't know how, why, or what sorcery is this but I AM FEELING THE EXACT SAME WAY, and it is not fun... I'm literally just waiting and hoping for this period to pass.
lol, much love and stay strong
hugs
>:D
so crazy how relatable this video was to me! , like almost everything you said sounded like the thoughts in my own head 😅. As I'm 24, I'm a recent fine art graduate, I very much so miss my studio space where I could paint huge canvas and draw and experiment happily. Now I only have my flat where i dont have much space, or the motivation to create like i used to. Also very much concerned with what my 'practice' is because I feel like I had some idea in university but now I mostly make art in my sketchbook but its not really a 'practice' , dido also on not knowing what my next steps are in my artist journey... I wish you good luck in your 30s and hopefully you will once again find the joy in the art of creation! 💫🤎🌞
You had me at the title!
3:39 maybe go the ipad first so you have the option to go back a few steps but try not to and find the joy there
then after having done that go to paper :)
SO true Cheyenne
how did you know i had art block!! this is perfect, thank you
lovely video chey!
For me I rake it as before tge answers come to you amd they will this what all you are feeling is that very process I have no doubt that good things are coming for you ❤
Turning 30 is very special! Plan a party of your favorites past, present, and future. Thanks for sharing your thoughts about your creativity. You might want to read _Notebooks of the Mind_ which is a study of creative giants and how they met with their creativity. Also _Creative Collaboration_ is a good one too, both are by Vera John Steiner. These are texts are from creativity studies so the writing is academic, but you don't have to read all of the text, just flip pages and scan through it and read the parts that resonate for you, kind of like girl snack dinners!
Art block really sucks, that’s what I’m going through right now too 😅
Te quiero, lo estás haciendo increíble
NEW CHEY NEW CHEY ❤❤
Omg not me drawing on my ipad while this video is on the tv and a few minutes before I was thinking this is a boring drawing, just a leopard and a lotus flower but whatever it is pretty, and then you were like this is boring haha 😅
Have you tried doing some DTIYS challenges? Just dl a bunch of illustrations and try drawing other people’s characters. You don’t have to stress with coming up with a concept or worry about finishing the final art piece cause it’s not something that you can monetize. It’s freeing drawing a bunch of stuff outside your comfort zone. Just a suggestion 😊
i always forget about these!! that's a great idea!!
I love your little guy!
New chey vid!!
30 lol...im about to turn 50...and i feel the same with my artwork and music lately..50 is a hard one...looking back..regrets...😮 wish i could go back to 30..just saying 😊
I would not choose another studio. But a house with an extra room to be only a studio. And the rest a home. Alltogether? Too overwelming.
Also, you get an idea of you you trully are, after 40. Trust me. Play until then. Have fun
Mushroom guy 😍😍😍😍
yaaaaaa
Heeeey!! I was there too... And kinda feel impostor is there always, forever... But have you ever read THE ARTIST WAY? 👀👀👀 It is helping me a looooot.
Art block genuinely is the worst
HI, I also am in the creative field! I actually really like watching you because I own my own business and am in theater! I go to virtual body doubling, it's called spacetime monotasking. and it has helped me be a little more"practiced" with my work. I hope it helps you too!