Pizza Farm with Nick Offerman

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  • Опубліковано 13 лип 2015
  • Comedy website and film/TV production company Funny or Die has produced a satirical video in partnership with the American Heart Association in answer to the ongoing debate in Congress on healthy school meals.
    The satirical video features “Parks and Recreation” star Nick Offerman, who offers a tour of his “Pizza Farm,” where “healthy” snacks like taquitos and fish fingers are “grown".
    Tell your lawmakers to protect strong school nutrition standards at www.yourethecure.org/schoolmeals.

КОМЕНТАРІ • 549

  • @bingbong3028
    @bingbong3028 7 років тому +635

    the pluck when he pulled pizza off the vine was fantastic

    • @taylorwebber1275
      @taylorwebber1275 7 років тому +99

      Taquito Lord i know a ripe pizza when i hear one 😁

  • @featherman9
    @featherman9 9 років тому +2018

    I used to go to that farm as a kid! That is Sweetums Farmily farm!

    • @yujm7
      @yujm7 9 років тому +151

      featherman9 If you can't beat em Sweetum

    • @featherman9
      @featherman9 9 років тому +30

      John Yu ya that is what they used to say!

    • @probablyoudsigma1315
      @probablyoudsigma1315 7 років тому +11

      bobby newport!

    • @percywearspurple
      @percywearspurple 7 років тому +33

      BOBBY NEEEEWWPORT

    • @Jetsfool27
      @Jetsfool27 7 років тому +11

      Levi Jeremy Jam your move👀👀👀👀 #RetroJammed

  • @ARSZLB
    @ARSZLB 7 років тому +262

    "my teeth feel soft" i'm dying

    • @Veodir
      @Veodir 6 років тому +6

      Then you should probably see a doctor

    • @zacharyharris628
      @zacharyharris628 4 роки тому +1

      Death Demon no. He’s referencing to what the girl said in this video

    • @charliedeew5416
      @charliedeew5416 4 роки тому

      That’s awful. Please get help.

    • @user-ub9sn7dq3h
      @user-ub9sn7dq3h 3 роки тому

      why i dont get this joke

    • @someguy2135
      @someguy2135 11 місяців тому +1

      @@user-ub9sn7dq3h Eating a high sugar diet makes your teeth soft.

  • @TheEntryCode
    @TheEntryCode 6 років тому +64

    "Soaking up the minerals and vitamins from the sun." That's enough to make a scientist internally scream.

    • @totoroneblinny6100
      @totoroneblinny6100 Рік тому

      How you think electricity is caught? think dummy

    • @androswolf
      @androswolf Рік тому +3

      internally ? Screw that. Any selfrespecting scientist would scream it all the way to the heavens and back again for all to hear

    • @jamesha175
      @jamesha175 Рік тому

      just to be fair, we do absorb some vitamin D from the sunlight

    • @androswolf
      @androswolf Рік тому +3

      @@jamesha175 Not quite. Our body produces vitamin d on its own when exposed to sunlight.

    • @ShrirajHegde
      @ShrirajHegde 5 днів тому

      ​@@jamesha175 You don't "absorb" vitamin D from the sun. The UV radiation from the sun makes the fat below the skin to become a precursor for Vitamin D from chemical reaction.

  • @ZS1productions
    @ZS1productions 7 років тому +138

    best alternate dimension i've ever seen

  • @TheBavarianLawyer
    @TheBavarianLawyer 9 років тому +603

    Brawndo. It's got what plants crave.

    • @dorkmax7073
      @dorkmax7073 7 років тому +22

      TheBavarianLawyer It's got electrolytes.

    • @masonkane5884
      @masonkane5884 7 років тому +11

      NOBODY'S BUYING BRAWNDO THE THIRST MUTILATOR !!!

    • @sinnison23
      @sinnison23 7 років тому +25

      I ain't never seen no plant grow outta no toilet.

    • @theswampcreature455
      @theswampcreature455 7 років тому +10

      But what are electrolytes, do you even know?

    • @leroy_jenkenz1541
      @leroy_jenkenz1541 7 років тому +13

      theswampcreature455 it's what plants crave

  • @warriorlink8612
    @warriorlink8612 2 роки тому +48

    The fact that time, money and production was put into this makes me so happy for some reason.

  • @NotAndy28
    @NotAndy28 9 років тому +551

    Classic Ron Swanson

    • @circiequisling4313
      @circiequisling4313 7 років тому +76

      Not even close. Ron Swanson is a Libertarian. He would NEVER want the Government decide what you eat for you. He would allow the fat kids to die early, and the healthy ones to man up on the swanson food pyramid... in what second level of hell is this any where NEAR a swanson?

    • @ITroopTheSpace
      @ITroopTheSpace 7 років тому +12

      Circie Quisling Also Ron doesn't like fish.

    • @keithm5224
      @keithm5224 6 років тому +5

      It's the vegetable of meats

    • @unc54
      @unc54 6 років тому +21

      "The whole point of this country is if you want to eat garbage, balloon up to 600 pounds and die of a heart attack at 43, you can! You are free to do so. To me, that’s beautiful."
      - Ron Swanson

    • @crazyd4ve875
      @crazyd4ve875 6 років тому +1

      Hes standing up to Obama and the governements strict food laws

  • @silverwindspirit
    @silverwindspirit 7 років тому +906

    I want that hose with soda

    • @vladkostin7557
      @vladkostin7557 7 років тому +40

      And another one with diabetes medicine.

    • @TheStockwell
      @TheStockwell 7 років тому +22

      Such dreams CAN come true. When the Danish scientist Niels Bohr won the Nobel Prize for Physics in 1922, his fellow countrymen at Carlsberg Beer gave him a house - next to their brewery. It's gets better, though. The house had a pipeline running direct from the brewery to a beer tap inside Bohr's new home.
      You can NOT make up stuff like that. Well, you COULD - but that would be lying.

    • @michaelovitch
      @michaelovitch 7 років тому +10

      Watch idiocracy then.

    • @TheStockwell
      @TheStockwell 7 років тому +2

      . . . because it's water, lying about being milk.
      Hah har har!

    • @Jefff72
      @Jefff72 7 років тому +9

      Make that a hose of German beer.

  • @Samst0n
    @Samst0n 7 років тому +105

    "Go away..."

  • @nas1479
    @nas1479 8 років тому +370

    1:48 You had one job

  • @tacodog767
    @tacodog767 7 років тому +11

    "my teath feel soft" "go away." that was the highlight of the video for me.

  • @danagray9709
    @danagray9709 Рік тому +5

    "French Fries are practically salads, which is why I like mine with ranch." I've never felt a quote so much in my life!

  • @VeniVidiVid
    @VeniVidiVid 9 років тому +304

    Just don't stand under a Chicago deep dish tree. In autumn, it can kill ya.

  • @NewMessage
    @NewMessage 7 років тому +57

    Not one word about the pepperoni blight of '97, and the thousands of lunchlady jobs lost when the crop failed?

  • @danielflanard8274
    @danielflanard8274 6 років тому +6

    I forgot how much I love this guy. Nick is such a good actor and a cool guy.

  • @alcaponed16
    @alcaponed16 6 років тому +19

    "French fries are basically salads."
    I always say that yet no one believes me :'(

  • @abby2point0
    @abby2point0 9 років тому +207

    Wtf. Where's my pizza tree?!

    • @JohnyComeLately
      @JohnyComeLately 7 років тому +11

      Abby Insaiyan right next to my money tree!

    • @richardfaccio4291
      @richardfaccio4291 7 років тому +10

      Abby Insaiyan actually pizza grows on a vine

    • @Jefff72
      @Jefff72 7 років тому +1

      Pay me via PayPal and I'll send you one. lol

    • @joezze-bear
      @joezze-bear 7 років тому +3

      Did you remember to water the seeds with cola?

    • @722lovemonkey
      @722lovemonkey 7 років тому +11

      Joezze-Bear Cola makes them grow faster sure, but they have much shorter life spans. I'd recommend watering them with sprite. Sure it'll take a little longer for the pizza to ripen, but at least you'll be able to sleep in on harvest day. ;)

  • @wanderingbufoon
    @wanderingbufoon 3 роки тому +3

    Love that character break when he chuckled in his line "what could be better than this?"

  • @LAOK242
    @LAOK242 6 років тому +8

    "Who care how it got there." golden line right there. xD

  • @TomCei
    @TomCei 6 років тому +23

    Beer comes from hops. Hops are plants. Beer is salad.

    • @EBFilmsMan
      @EBFilmsMan 5 років тому +2

      And barley! And other plants! It's a great salad!

    • @googiegress7459
      @googiegress7459 3 роки тому +2

      Rubber is tree sap, and maple syrup is made from tree sap. So tires and condoms should be put on pancakes.

    • @Xeviius
      @Xeviius Рік тому

      corn's a fruit. syrup comes from a bush.

  • @sminthian
    @sminthian 7 років тому +5

    Anything with Nick Offerman automatically gets a like.

  • @joshhurwitz433
    @joshhurwitz433 7 років тому +175

    This is about as true as anything our school actually tells us about nutrition

    • @msiley
      @msiley 6 років тому

      Progressives run the schools.... and Josh didn't miss the point... you missed his.

    • @MadMax-yq9ix
      @MadMax-yq9ix 6 років тому

      Salads and pizza trees for school!

    • @Johny40Se7en
      @Johny40Se7en Рік тому

      Oh right you are. Shouldn't be laughing at it, but it's SO pathetic and absurd... 😅🤣

  • @Balzdeepinurmama
    @Balzdeepinurmama 2 роки тому +7

    I laughed so hard when he drank from the cola hose

  • @jarydmolinari827
    @jarydmolinari827 8 років тому +3

    The captain's dream from wall-e came true

  • @jasonlee3055
    @jasonlee3055 7 років тому +19

    God bless Ron Swanson teller of truth.

    • @gold4963
      @gold4963 7 років тому

      Amen. XD

    • @someguy2135
      @someguy2135 11 місяців тому

      You know this is satire, right?

  • @SKRUNKLES
    @SKRUNKLES 7 років тому +21

    but is the pizza 🅱 O N E L E S S

  • @gabrielafernandes6223
    @gabrielafernandes6223 8 років тому +101

    Am I the only one that wishes the pizza part could be true.

  • @DMLand
    @DMLand 13 годин тому

    I'm so glad that the AHA committed to the bit, rather than pulling back at the last minute to undermine the humor by saying "But of course, none of those foods is good for you." Perfection.

  • @Alwaysbusking
    @Alwaysbusking 7 років тому +4

    That WAS A HILARIOUSLY COMICAL FOURTH WALL BREAK!

  • @loriallenbaugh35
    @loriallenbaugh35 2 дні тому

    The cola hose! 😂 Straight outta “Idiocracy”. I truly love Nick Offerman❣️

  • @cherylhopper6076
    @cherylhopper6076 7 років тому

    Makes the point perfectly.

  • @jaydee548
    @jaydee548 6 років тому +3

    This would never happen on Schrute. Farms ! Beets for Life!!

  • @ajeje1996
    @ajeje1996 6 років тому +6

    True story, believe it or not.
    In 2015 I went to Frankfurt to learn german. I stayed there for 33 days.
    I ate pizza twice a day, every day. At night, before going to bed, I used to go on the roof balcony and drink cheap whiskey straight from the bottle.
    Sometimes, I would smoke a half-cut cigar (Ammezzati I brought with me from Italy).
    It was the best month of my life. Upon returning home, I took a routine medical exam. Apparently, I was healthier than when I left.
    P.S. The night of my return, I also ate pizza.

    • @noahw4623
      @noahw4623 6 років тому +4

      12D3
      Pizza is actually pretty healthy. It's just most people eat too much and they soak it in grease.

    • @womenteteatete
      @womenteteatete Рік тому

      Italian pizza is not made from unhealthy, overly processed ingredients and questionable flours with fillers
      Same goes for bread from European countries

  • @jarydmolinari827
    @jarydmolinari827 8 років тому +1

    "my teeth feel funny" "go away"

  • @bodvarson1933
    @bodvarson1933 7 років тому +101

    This isn't Ron!!! He's supporting eating vegetables! Tammy 1 got to him again.

  • @singinginthedark2786
    @singinginthedark2786 7 років тому

    best commercial ever!

  • @FishFreddy
    @FishFreddy 7 років тому +15

    When I was in highschool 20 years ago (Netherlands) we had to bring our own lunch. The only thing you could buy at school is a cookie/mars or soda can as an extra which people did like once a week. Lunch itself came from home and is the responsibility of the parent/teenager. Teenagers must be able to prepare their own food.
    Only a very small group was fat there. It's weird to see how much big corporations in America have an influence on what children eat. If they would have served pizza, fries, hamburgers and sloppy joe's we would have stuffed ourselves as well.

    • @mattharding886
      @mattharding886 6 років тому

      Same as here in Canada. Parents should be responsible for determining and thus providing proper food for there child's lunches.

    • @MsMesem
      @MsMesem 6 років тому

      Same deal in NZ. Had to often stand outside in the cold wind eating sandwiches. Now many children from poor homes in NZ don't get breakfast or lunch from home, charities donate the goods and the kids eat at school. Proper canteens ensuring that every child sits down at a table to eat one nutritious hot meal a day is the way to go. The kids and their education win. Big social education too in how to behave in this situation.

  • @wickedleeloopy2115
    @wickedleeloopy2115 2 роки тому

    We need more of these 😆

  • @elvenatheart982
    @elvenatheart982 2 роки тому

    Lovely sketch

  • @Pizza____God
    @Pizza____God 7 років тому

    i bless this and everyone who helped conceived it

  • @Jabangstyle
    @Jabangstyle 6 років тому

    Beautiful!

  • @Tiagotaf
    @Tiagotaf 6 років тому +1

    This was amazing! I'm baffled to see people disliking this video. Don't they understand sarcasm ?

  • @Camyi97
    @Camyi97 5 років тому

    This is awesome!

  • @logmeindog
    @logmeindog 9 років тому

    Yes!

  • @MaxPlayne87
    @MaxPlayne87 2 роки тому +1

    UA-cam waited until 2021 to recommend this to me

  • @chandlerrecord1657
    @chandlerrecord1657 6 років тому +3

    "If it grows on a plant it good for you who cares how it got there"

  • @SilojensenDK
    @SilojensenDK 15 днів тому

    Tractor is an Allis-Chalmers D19 with a home made paintjob and a replacement steering wheel. First tractor with a factory turbo.

  • @tfb4699
    @tfb4699 9 років тому

    i'm not sure how i found this but i'm so glad that i did

  • @korihoornstra7364
    @korihoornstra7364 6 років тому

    This was awesome

  • @kryten88
    @kryten88 7 років тому

    love it

  • @PatriotGamerBoy
    @PatriotGamerBoy 7 років тому

    amazing

  • @CroakerOutdoors
    @CroakerOutdoors 7 років тому +1

    My old school bought massive bushels from the farm that sold hot steak-ums and "cheese".

  • @kelpnougatcrunch9430
    @kelpnougatcrunch9430 7 років тому

    I was happy till the end

  • @jorgeluisgarcia1006
    @jorgeluisgarcia1006 8 років тому +3

    ...sucking out the vitamins and minerals from the sun... LOL, excellent!!!

  • @clarktooncrossing3975
    @clarktooncrossing3975 4 роки тому +1

    Right now, the Captain from the Axiom is loosing his mind over that. If anybody gets that reference, you’re awesome!

  • @DESTRAKON
    @DESTRAKON 8 років тому

    This is awesome

  • @moltendiamondgaming2480
    @moltendiamondgaming2480 8 років тому +2

    I put this video into a presentation in health class. He reminded the class that they should have caught the sarcasm in that, or they would have some problems...

  • @nanigirl2002
    @nanigirl2002 6 років тому +3

    “My teeth feel soft...” *go away*

  • @WanjiJibei
    @WanjiJibei 6 років тому

    Oh how much I love America

  • @onelonelyginger9153
    @onelonelyginger9153 6 років тому +1

    1:03 my teeth feel soft.
    Go away 😂😂

  • @joaobernardesjr9485
    @joaobernardesjr9485 3 роки тому

    muito bom

  • @fl6127
    @fl6127 7 років тому +6

    0:59
    Nick's laugh is priceless.

  • @miracle03
    @miracle03 7 років тому

    A+ for effort

  • @triclopsgamer5934
    @triclopsgamer5934 3 роки тому +1

    As long as the packaging says "Natural" we're good... Because Natural = Healthy. LOL 🤣🤣🤣

  • @CallardAndBowser
    @CallardAndBowser 6 років тому +4

    And with the science of GMO's we'll eventually get you that slice of pizza on a vine !!!

  • @frankvillarreal4619
    @frankvillarreal4619 6 років тому

    Her run was hilarious.

  • @dalelenze3736
    @dalelenze3736 7 років тому

    The girl running at the end got a laugh out of me.

  • @yizhuolin3906
    @yizhuolin3906 3 роки тому +1

    damn, I've been thinking about this farm before watching this video! definitely a dream come true.

  • @joshnestberg5717
    @joshnestberg5717 7 років тому

    One of the best videos known to man

  • @glen6945
    @glen6945 2 роки тому +1

    love those fresh growing pizza from the earth

  • @ParkdaleAveProductions
    @ParkdaleAveProductions 6 років тому

    Farm of my dreams!

  • @augustohofmann4970
    @augustohofmann4970 4 години тому

    The BBC did a April fools broadcast about spaghetti trees in the 50s or 60s and lots of people called them inquiring where they could buy the seeds xD

  • @MrCab236
    @MrCab236 Рік тому

    Very interventional dude perfectly

    • @MrCab236
      @MrCab236 Рік тому

      Is this cool Delaware Guy

  • @COGGYCOGSY
    @COGGYCOGSY 7 років тому +1

    I approve this message!

  • @SomePkmnlovingdude
    @SomePkmnlovingdude Рік тому +1

    I wish farms like that were real.

  • @grominnoodlez8554
    @grominnoodlez8554 7 років тому +1

    This has to be ture its on youtube!!!!!!

  • @mardakworkshop4450
    @mardakworkshop4450 7 років тому

    hhhhhhhh i just like nick

  • @Sponska
    @Sponska 6 років тому

    1:48 Yeah, you better run when Nick Offerman looks at you like that!

  • @Jeerin_
    @Jeerin_ 6 років тому +1

    I so wish this was real!!! Also that basket of pizza he was holding looked godly!!!!!!

  • @Chris-ut6eq
    @Chris-ut6eq 2 години тому

    No fruit or vegetable was harmed in the making of this video.

  • @gordon4385
    @gordon4385 7 років тому

    Nick for president!

  • @jaylew8408
    @jaylew8408 6 років тому

    I think he should have a late night show alongside the guy who voices archer. Id watch religiously

  • @matthewyarnell3272
    @matthewyarnell3272 2 роки тому +1

    Nice :)

  • @soXCold
    @soXCold 6 років тому

    awww that poor girl. she's so cute though!

  • @CannibalLecter
    @CannibalLecter 7 років тому

    ...People are all natural...

  • @thedepressedmanatee7807
    @thedepressedmanatee7807 6 років тому

    Nick offerman the only person who can make another run away with a look

  • @HarryCecad
    @HarryCecad 9 років тому

    Reminiscent of Jack Parr's trip to the spaghetti orchards in Italy from the early 60s

  • @meagandunn4141
    @meagandunn4141 9 років тому

    I can't believe this doesn't have any comments yet. I feel like Nick is about to lose it any second. It kills me.

  • @DaveWuzHere
    @DaveWuzHere 6 років тому

    1:56 That's something to live by

  • @Doobiebandito
    @Doobiebandito 6 років тому

    I actually work at round table and I will say yes this is how it is done

  • @ginoasci2876
    @ginoasci2876 6 років тому

    Amazon sells Pizza Tree Seeds so you can plant your own. Make sure you feed ut olive oil for the first growing season.

  • @LowPhat
    @LowPhat 6 років тому +3

    I'll take a couple

  • @monkle8479
    @monkle8479 7 років тому

    I like fries with ranch too I thought I was the only one

  • @Scorpionoxide
    @Scorpionoxide 6 років тому

    "My teeth feel soft"
    "Go away"

  • @w12nardo94
    @w12nardo94 5 років тому +1

    Pizza time

  • @sheadjohn
    @sheadjohn 6 днів тому

    Looks like the classic spaghetti tree prank

  • @creativityplusstupidity4887
    @creativityplusstupidity4887 6 років тому

    Reminds me of the captain from wall-e who thought pizza grew from plants

  • @cattigereyes1
    @cattigereyes1 6 років тому

    The healthy choice!

  • @dunsparcedm43
    @dunsparcedm43 6 років тому

    “That’s what my food eats.”