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We always believe it's our fault at some level - this is exactly what abusers/neglectful immature family/caretakers rely upon - it takes pressure off them. It is never our fault but we are responsible for our healing. From this pain comes our power. I was drugged & sexually abused by uncle/others from about age 2 - 13 & assaulted later in other situations but now at 42 I have reclaimed my Spirit. Very grateful to the MeToo movement & Rose M for helping us speak our Truth more publically. Please also remember the boys & men who are also survivors. There are many. Keep the faith in yourselves. Peace 💜
@@ChloeShaliniArt I was awe struck by your entry. The one thing I am so grateful for is that you lived through it. I used to say why didn’t they just kill me, because the pain agony and torture of being abused by family members and then not being believed by any other family member, it’s unbearable. I chose lots of bad things in my life but always wanted to be free of this agonizing pain. Then I learned of caring for your inner child, and Emdr where you can change your thought processes and beliefs. Believe me I did not want to be on this earth for most of the time I have been here. But finally at 50. Yeah 50. I found something that helps. No amount of books helped because they only seem to help you recognize what you have. I knew what I when thru, I needed something more to pin point what when where and why. It’s all for jealousy. I was the youngest child. All they saw was how much love I was getting, not ever thinking they might have gotten the same love as I did as a baby. Now that my sister/ (one of my tormentors), and both parents are gone, they know the truth. How holding me down and tickling me until I throw up then SA ing me is correlated I have no clue. I was stuck from 5 to 18.
I was and to this day am still being gaslighted into thinking I had some kind of memory issue and that the sexual abuse never happened... Saying I made the whole thing up... I was not believed by my own parents or my siblings... even by my own sister who herself was abused as well... I feel so alone...
I'm just a stranger on the internet, but I also experienced my family and friends not believing me. And I believe you. I think part of it, is when people talk about SA, it makes other people feel unsafe, so in order to protect themselves from feeling unsafe, they choose to disbelieve victims. This actually makes society more unsafe, because it prevents people from reporting it, and it enables predators to harm other people.
Thank you ladies for sharing. I am doing EMDR right now and the thing I am having the worst time figuring out is why I loved and devoted myself to my parents. Who did not believe that I was being tortured with SA by my own brother and sister who were 2 and 7 years older then me. I was 6 at the time. My parents were never home and went away for weeks at a time for business trips. There were many incidents that they witnessed to show them I was not safe alone with them. But they did nothing. I was forced to shove it down my whole life. I am struggling to figure out why I loved them.
EMDR also helped me after my assault. I'd really recommend you check out Patrick Teahan, especially his video, 'How Toxic Is Your Family? Family Systems Test'. He does a lot of videos about childhood trauma, and he's got useful tips on how to cope, how to heal, and how to not let other people invalidate your experiences.
@@davidestabrook5367 unfortunately both parents are gone now. So is my sister, my brother I refuse to speak to for his continual mistreatments. I have always known I was in a toxic family. But, I was trapped with no one believing me. So my brain over compensated and turned my love for my parents into best friends. It’s hard to understand but with cptsd. My therapist has helped me understand. I am finally in a great place now where I control my situation. A loving husband and a gamer boy. But, yes I have read so many books on narcissists, types of family devotion, etc. those did not help me because I already knew what I had. There was just never a solution. Until now. So awesome that it helped you too. I with there were more “ the more you know commercials” about how to treat people how not to kill. How you will get less time for rape than killing, not that either is acceptable by any means, mostly what people should and shouldn’t do. There are no classes on how to let go after being denied sex. You know?
If you would like to donate to help keep SurvivorTribe up and running, please visit our GoFundMe www.gofundme.com/f/donate-to-survivortribe. Every little bit helps!
this hurts to watch, but it is comforting to not feel so alone..
We always believe it's our fault at some level - this is exactly what abusers/neglectful immature family/caretakers rely upon - it takes pressure off them. It is never our fault but we are responsible for our healing. From this pain comes our power. I was drugged & sexually abused by uncle/others from about age 2 - 13 & assaulted later in other situations but now at 42 I have reclaimed my Spirit. Very grateful to the MeToo movement & Rose M for helping us speak our Truth more publically. Please also remember the boys & men who are also survivors. There are many. Keep the faith in yourselves. Peace 💜
@@ChloeShaliniArt I was awe struck by your entry. The one thing I am so grateful for is that you lived through it. I used to say why didn’t they just kill me, because the pain agony and torture of being abused by family members and then not being believed by any other family member, it’s unbearable. I chose lots of bad things in my life but always wanted to be free of this agonizing pain. Then I learned of caring for your inner child, and Emdr where you can change your thought processes and beliefs. Believe me I did not want to be on this earth for most of the time I have been here. But finally at 50. Yeah 50. I found something that helps. No amount of books helped because they only seem to help you recognize what you have. I knew what I when thru, I needed something more to pin point what when where and why. It’s all for jealousy. I was the youngest child. All they saw was how much love I was getting, not ever thinking they might have gotten the same love as I did as a baby. Now that my sister/ (one of my tormentors), and both parents are gone, they know the truth. How holding me down and tickling me until I throw up then SA ing me is correlated I have no clue. I was stuck from 5 to 18.
I was and to this day am still being gaslighted into thinking I had some kind of memory issue and that the sexual abuse never happened... Saying I made the whole thing up... I was not believed by my own parents or my siblings... even by my own sister who herself was abused as well... I feel so alone...
I'm just a stranger on the internet, but I also experienced my family and friends not believing me. And I believe you.
I think part of it, is when people talk about SA, it makes other people feel unsafe, so in order to protect themselves from feeling unsafe, they choose to disbelieve victims.
This actually makes society more unsafe, because it prevents people from reporting it, and it enables predators to harm other people.
Thank you ladies for sharing. I am doing EMDR right now and the thing I am having the worst time figuring out is why I loved and devoted myself to my parents. Who did not believe that I was being tortured with SA by my own brother and sister who were 2 and 7 years older then me. I was 6 at the time.
My parents were never home and went away for weeks at a time for business trips. There were many incidents that they witnessed to show them I was not safe alone with them. But they did nothing. I was forced to shove it down my whole life. I am struggling to figure out why I loved them.
EMDR also helped me after my assault.
I'd really recommend you check out Patrick Teahan, especially his video, 'How Toxic Is Your Family? Family Systems Test'.
He does a lot of videos about childhood trauma, and he's got useful tips on how to cope, how to heal, and how to not let other people invalidate your experiences.
@@davidestabrook5367 unfortunately both parents are gone now. So is my sister, my brother I refuse to speak to for his continual mistreatments. I have always known I was in a toxic family. But, I was trapped with no one believing me. So my brain over compensated and turned my love for my parents into best friends. It’s hard to understand but with cptsd. My therapist has helped me understand. I am finally in a great place now where I control my situation. A loving husband and a gamer boy. But, yes I have read so many books on narcissists, types of family devotion, etc. those did not help me because I already knew what I had. There was just never a solution. Until now. So awesome that it helped you too.
I with there were more “ the more you know commercials” about how to treat people how not to kill. How you will get less time for rape than killing, not that either is acceptable by any means, mostly what people should and shouldn’t do. There are no classes on how to let go after being denied sex. You know?
This is due to dysfunction within Families, and corporations. Lack of empathy is the issue here ...