the fear of wasting time is stealing my joy
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- Опубліковано 28 лис 2024
- do you ever feel like you're wasting your precious time on earth on silly things that don't matter? do you feel anxious and frustrated and don't know what to do about it? me too. let's feel it together.
i really only scratched the surface of this big topic and i feel like there's so much more i could've said, but i hope to touch on this a bit more in the future, so today i present to you an opening of a conversation.
music:
Allem Iversom, little blue - Small Whispers chll.to/21868c24
It's soooo refreshing to see you talk about this feeling!!! I know a lot of us /these days/ feel it, but I wish I came across more people just talking about it like you did! Not feeling the need to fully know what to do, just exploring these feelings, not being afraid of them, and being strong enough to share these thoughts, it's just also Nice and Comforting and Healing. I hope the act of putting these videos together and expressing yourself through this medium is also Nice and Healing for you uwu
this means so much to me 😭 i’m so glad it’s comforting to hear, it is also Nice and Healing for me to express :’) thank you so much 💖
I agree. I dont want to stress over time anymore. It has robbed me of a lot of time. Time started feeling sped up and i almost convinced myself it was going at double speed because im not doing anything.
I like to think of it as I never know how much is left and people fall into disasters that waste time. So I just have to accept it and consider myself lucky I have had enough time for a break from the things I've spent a lot of time doing.
It's not like my wasting time has been a 'rush' like you said. More like I'm freezing up with anxiety.
oh my gosh, thank you so much for putting this into words. I couldn't work out what this feeling was or how to implement any changes this has sparked off so many more ideas and perspectives. Exactly the thing I was searching for
I understand the annoyance of knowing you can do something more and stay consistent. Still, the thought and action of grabbing your phone or computer and wasting time watching movies, shorts and videos are more enjoyable now than focusing on what you told yourself beforehand that you know is better for you. This is a constant problem for me, mainly because I would lay around and watch youtube all day (like I did this whole day). Still, I found staying at home or at a certain place for too long begins boring me, which I then resort to picking up my phone and killing that boredom, only to find myself 30-60 mins deep into a video that I don't watch for the plot or for its context but to get a dopamine rush. It is annoying, but that's what I learned.
Focusing on time too much is anxiety-inducing, and telling yourself that you have all the time is good, but from my experience, telling yourself that is almost like a double-edged sword. If you are doing something productive and you feel as though you are rushing through it, saying that to yourself becomes beneficial as it allows you to slow down and digest it or understand it better; on the other hand, if you were wasting your time on your phone or something else, you would feel annoyed and anxious that you are not focusing on the important task, which therefore you tell yourself that you have all the time you need creates a feedback loop that repeats itself every so 10-20 mins, resulting in more wasted time.
But this video was very helpful as it shows me I am not the only one having these types of issues, but also the voice memo journalling is a practice that I will try to implement.
The last thing I want to say is that if you do find yourself back on your bad habits, just remember that those habits have been practised for years and will take roughly the same amount of time to iron out bit by bit, so don't be always hard on yourself if it does happen.
But this was a very good refresher and has helped me a lot since I finally completed the task I set out since noon that I kept pushing back. So thank you very much for that.
Take care everyone.
thank you so much for this thoughtful comment! you're absolutely right, it's all about the dopamine rush when we pick up our phones without really meaning to. and i honestly believe (and my therapist would agree, lol) that it's an addiction, so i think the tendency we may have to blame and punish ourselves mentally for the choice we keep making to pick up our phones when we know it's not good for us, only feeds that cycle; we realize we're wasting our time, we get angry at ourselves for doing so, and we keep picking up the phone because it distracts us from our anger and shame. still, it's really hard not to fall into that shaming and blaming. i find myself doing it a lot.
but that's, i think, why the affirmation works for me. where the critical self-talk only feeds the cycle, the affirmation of having all the time i need helps to soften all of it and i feel like i have more space to act from a place of responsibility and mindful self-discipline. it hasn't been a bullet-proof method for me, but it is the thing that's worked the best for me so far, definitely more so than blaming myself.
and i feel like in the video i might have made it sound like i don't recommend voice memo journaling, but i definitely do! i prefer writing but i still do the voice memo thing when i actually am pressed for time and need an outlet. the important thing for me is being mindful about the reason why i'm choosing that option instead. all that really matters is that you're doing what works best for you in each moment, so i'm glad voice memo journaling is something you want to try and i hope you find it helpful!
i'm really happy this video gave you a little bit of comfort knowing you're not alone in this experience. thank you again for taking the time to share your thoughts 💖
I developed hellish OCD over this for 2 years… I’ve had to learn to purposefully waste time, to rewire my brain to accept the risk that any choice MIGHT fail
This video helped me so much. Thank you ❤
i’m so glad!!
well..i m not sure but i think the severity of this issue in us (youth) will be worst in coming years and its because of our lifestyle, abundance of information & the presence as well as negative usage of social media, along with an un-disciplined personality.
a very simple and natural process helped me through this challenge..
1. Try to have a 10-15 minutes free of everything, i mean everything.. all your tasks, all gadgets, all people & all thoughts.. just have a seat somewhere silently and breath the LIFE in...feel the sounds in surroundings even if u cant hear any.. its not meditation.. its YOU.. and only YOU..
2. if u want, have a walk for 5-10 mints
3. Move around your house and feel & Observe things which you havnt thought about ever.. kitchen.. laundry.. plants.. furniture.. ceilings.. even your family...just FEEEEEL them...(Basically your mind is getting diverted from everything else to these certain things and upon observing, its creating new memories & Thoughts)
4. now you have reached to a level where your mind isnt craving for your gadgets or having any obsessive disturbing thoughts, so now you question yourself what is that one thing you actually wanna do...your heart & mind will sync and you will have the better thought process and answers...then plan accordingly..
repeat the process on alternate days for at least 2-4 weeks, trust me you will feel the difference & if you continue it further, you might change your whole perspective of things which will lead you to have better processing of LIFE & its protocols..
this whole exercise was only to divert your mind from things which are happening to you but you dont want them...
our body, mind & Life is very simple but we have made it very complicated..
and if you understand the processing of your body & Mind.. you can actually control your whole life & even your thoughts...for betterment
it might seem too good to be true but it in fact is true...
i think you might wanna try this and let us know the results here after a month
Best of luck & Take care
this is a great suggestion. what you're describing is essentially a mindfulness practice and i've personally experienced significant positive change in my life as a result of practicing mindfulness. but your suggestion to practice consistently for a few weeks to a month is a good one, so thank you! although presence and mindfulness have already changed my life for the better in many ways, the stress of life still gets to me and unfortunately healthy habits like this are usually the first things to fall away
@@rowanfox you welcome..
and dont worry..things are mostly difficult in the beginning, specially in case of self-discipline and self-growth..
so changing of habits takes some time..maybe 6 months or a year..then you will be good to go and will have a better control on things in ur life..