For those who are already on the journey of self-discovery and awareness, and who want to take their results to a higher level, Internal Family Systems (IFS) centric coaching offers a paradigm that is special for the ways it builds outward from the usual focus on goal-driven accountability.
In recent years, there has been an exploding interest in IFS among both mental health and more recently coaching professionals. 2023 marks the 40th year since family therapist Richard Schwartz, PhD first conceived of Internal Family Systems while assisting young folks who were struggling with life-threatening eating disorders. It's true that IFS has been -- and continues to be -- a well regarded, evidence-based psychotherapy. (The 2023 official IFS Institute conference in Denver sold out its in-person attendance!) However, as with several other methods that began in the psychotherapy domain, such as somatic mindfulness and Nonviolent Communication, IFS has also adapted to the mainstream of forward-focused professional coaching.
I'm grateful that I began studying and incorporating IFS in my practice in 2016. Becoming proficient and effective as an IFS professional takes time; it's not a weekend workshop or even a year's training. The mechanics of IFS are straight-forward. However, to properly embody IFS as a way of relating to our own internal team, and then develop the skills necessary to properly assist and serve others, is much more than an academic pursuit.
There are books and videos galore for the IFS-curious at all levels of study. However, there is no substitute for the direct experience that's possible with a skilled IFS professional.
After a recent introductory session with a person who has years of prior experience in mindfulness and self-awareness work, I received a thank you that included this: "[I] appreciate the attention and consideration you're giving your offer. The session was powerful for me; I think it really regulated my system."
As a degreed biologist and a former (recovering, LOL) technical engineer, I speak geek with technical and healthcare professionals. One of my favorite clients is an older, experience-savvy primary care physician who has done everything from helping patients with the common cold, to being present and intuitive at a critical moment for a distressed young adult who was contemplating suicide. This physician and I have regular, insightful, and meaningful conversations where, together, we assist his system to identify and heal distresses that have affected him for years, and sometimes decades.
It would be nice to be able to promise "the five breakthrough transformations you will have by working with me," or something like that. But that's not possible. The reality is that only your system knows the inhibiting stories and experiences, and the ways they are inter-connected. Some people think of this as "shadow work". I call it "sunlight work". But what is crucially important is careful, compassionate pacing and regular checks for permission from the client's system. That's the way we prevent overwhelm and distress.
I hope you're curious enough about your internal system, and trusting enough, to reach out and find out how IFS can benefit you -- whether it is with me or with another skilled IFS professional.
You can find me at Rocky Mountain Calm RockyMountainCalm.org or on LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/in/richardtashma/, or you can jump to the front of the line and book an individual conversation on my Calendly page calendly.com/richardtashma
Thank you for joining me and for considering how IFS might be the key that unlocks your next leap forward!
Respectfully yours,
- Richard Tashma
"Tomorrow's mastery begins with mental calm today."
#mindfulness #internalfamilysystems #relationships #thebodykeepsthescore #mindfulcoachassociation
Music credit: "Ethereal" by composer and musician Alexander Nakarada
Used with permission.