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thanks :)

Congratulations on finding freedom yourself! It is definitely a journey that can feel nervewracking to start but is also exciting because, well... freedom brings joy. In this with you <3

Preaching right back to me - I need to be reminded of that frequently. But God!

Thanks so much! Your encouragement to share an update is part of what inspired this video

Feels good to be back!

Thanks friend <3

Hasn't been an easy road, but yes, so grateful for Jesus and the comfort of the Holy Spirit - have no idea how I would do life without God!

Blessings on you as you walk this journey. -Matina

Thank you for saying that! I am so glad it is helpful to you - testimony is powerful - the only way I found my way through this was others sharing their story so it's an honor to continue passing on the freedom that I have found! -Matina

I do eat fruit and use natural (no sugar added) fruit juices in some of my cooking. I have to be careful as I can easily binge on certain fruits and especially dried ones - those are basically candy.

I don't do any alternatives. It's possible I could handle them but when I started - I just gave myself that boundary of no sugar or sweeteners and not trying to do things that "mimic" sweets. It has helped me just to say those are off limits rather than try to dabble close to the line.

An update video should be coming tonight/tomorrow. Life has been really full and the time I have to film/edit/upload has been much more limited. But also, I've been walking through grief and processing a lot that needed to happen privately first before I could share on here. Always appreciate when people ask though because it holds me accountable both to my journey and also to sharing authentically where I'm at.

Appreciate your encouragement! I did not do BLE - though I think the program I did had similar boundaries. I joined a Christian 12 step prograam online called Full of Faith - they provide guidelines on types of foods that fit for proteins, grains etc. I'm posting an update video tomorrow that talks a little bit about having looser boundaries. I was really scared to allow changes to the boundaries because I found such "success" with the clarity of how I was doing things. And as life happens, I found the Lord adjusting those boundaries. When you justify behaviors for so long, it's hard to gauge if you really have a need for different boundaries or on a slippery slope back - at least for me it was. Reach out if you want/need to chat more Matina@matinahawkins.com

You are not alone! I wish I had more time to share on this platform because I see all that God has done through it so far - the global reach of this message of hope has energized my spirit so much. Thank you for sharing

Key word and not the easiest word to live out. Bleh, but also the beauty that's on the other side is sooo worth it. -Matina

Thanks for watching <3

I love this idea and often write my Sabbath journaling as letter to myself from God. It's been such a helpful practice. "Bring my joy to your body" oh - that preaches!

Acknowleding that and on such a public platform is a huge step of courage! Praying you received encouragement and insight in hearing some of my story. Food especially is something we can struggle in isolation with because people don't get it or think they do, but don't really. You are not alone! -Matina

@adventuringwithjesus like i cant even go a day without eating . I have to eat. It's just like watching porn I cant go a day without it .

That's one of the things that is so nuanced about food struggles is that there is a reality to needing food. We can't simply abstain all together. Which means that we have to really understand what kinds of boundaries we need and at least for me, everything changes when I invited God to direct the process. For so long I had been asking for his help but wanting him to step into whatever plan I had created/figured out might work for me. And the minute I stopped and said, ok - you take the lead and I will follow - my ability to actually stay within those bounds changed. Something I had never been able to do before all of a sudden I could and with a consistency I never imagined. I'm not sure where faith has a role in this for you but is there something you feel the Lord has asked you to do that you are having a hard time with? Or maybe there's an invitation to bring him into the process for the first time in this way?

@adventuringwithjesus he has asked me to fast. Everytime I try to read the bi le or even a mention of the name God i start to lash out and get very angry.

I am sorry to hear that. That tension when you feel God has asked something of you and feeling resistant to it is a difficult place for our spirit to be. While your journey is fully yours - I will say, that for me, fasting food wasn't something I was able to do until just this last year. My relationship with food was so distorted that I needed to see it as neutral for a while. In my experience with God, while we don't always like what He says, the things he puts in front of us are always to draw us closer to him. If right now, the idea of fasting is causing you to be angry, I wonder if there might be another step to take first. Taking even those thoughts and emotions to him - asking him to help you discern why these things are making you angry and what beliefs about Him and yourself you may be holding as part of that anger.

Thank you Sharon for all your kind and encouraging words. I am grateful that the Lord continues to use this platform to reach people with his message of healing and wholeness. There is so much that can get swept under the rug or feels like we can't talk about in church and yet church should be the safest place to bring all of our wounds. Thank you for listening and supporting! -Matina

Sounds like you have been using all the resources the Lord is putting in front of you. Don't give up until the miracle happens! Prayinig for an ability to release these last pounds as you walk with Him.

That sounds like such a difficult path you have walked Sharon and also one of immense freedom already. Takes courage to keep showing up and contending for full healing and freedom in all areas. Grateful the Lord is continuing to walk so closely with you through all of this. Blessings in your journey! -Matina

Thank you for that encouragement. Such a good (but also hard) moment when you receive that conviction and especially seeing it as idolatry :/ It's like a gut punch AND understanding it through that framework gives us a way to go at it. Obedience is better. Always. Praying for you and for the strength and insight as you walk this path. -Matina

You are so welcome! I am glad the Lord led you to my channel and that it gave you hope and encouragement. Praying for you in your journey <3 -Matina

So glad you find me here and that it was an encouragement. I am doing well! Hope to get an update video up at some point this year... life has taken some unexpected turns but stil doing well with health, eating and overall food journey. -Matina

I know that place so well. Literally didn't even realize that's what I was doing until that day in the car with the Lord and I realized I had been keeping Him out - wanting the relief without being willing to do it His way. Praying for you in this process. Freedom is absolutely possible! -Matina

I am not part of a recovery group anymore - didn't need to stay in one long term for my particular journey. But I did Full of Faith which is a Christian 12 step for food addiction and also Unraveled which is a women's year long group around healthy self image and relationships through Pure Desire. Both of these were such important pieces. And I LOVE the Life Recovery Bible. -Matina

Thank you so much for that encouragement and reminder. Am very grateful for all that the Lord has done in me that allows me to live a fuller and more free life. I am praying and know that even though the patterns and attached beliefs are longer standing patterns for you - there is still so much of your life to live and I am standing with you for freedom! -Matina

Thanks for watching!

A piece of my heart will always be there <3

Glad you found your way here as well. I do not have experience with bariatric surgery for myself though I do have a few friends who have had them done (some with success and some with a lot of challenges/complications). I did consider it at one point. The best comment on it that I've heard is that it is a tool - and just like any other tool - it's about how we use it. In my journey I decided to work on my relationship with food first to see if it would have an impact. I think had I ever gone through with the surgery and not done the work that has ultimately led to food freedom for me - I would have still been in bondage to food, just at a lighter physical weight. -Matina

@@adventuringwithjesus Thank you so much for your transparency & for being such an inspiration. I am going to continue to focus on my relationship with Jesus and also focus on establishing a healthy relationship with food for with God all things are possible and without Him nothing is possible. Philippians 4:13

It is possible! <3 -Matina

This is my story. 100% a miracle. Healing comes in all forms and I believe that God's plan for us includes the ability to experience freedom in any (and all) areas of our life. Understanding that there is an invitation to say yes to Jesus with my food choices and mindset has changed my life more ways than I can express. -Matinaa

I understand this very much! Praying for the strength to surrender the control in this area and the trust that the Lord can and will show you the way. -Matina

Praying for you in this journey! -Matina

Staying the course - this coming week will be celebrating 7 years of surrender <3 The journey has been a bit bumpier these past 2 years navigating some grief and understanding the love and grace of the Lord in all areas of my life, but still walking this path of freedom!

Glad you found this video and praying encouragement for you today! -Matina

@@adventuringwithjesus thank you so much. God bless you.

Absolutely - I know so well that feeling of just being fed up AND not really knowing what to do or where to turn. Praying for courage as you take practical steps in this journey. -Matina

So glad it was an encouragement to you. Press on! -Matina

Hello and so glad you found me here! Yes - I do plan to have more videos up... hopefully soon. 2023 held a lot of up and downs personally which led to not a lot of time/space for content. But I am still here and plan on sharing an update soon :) -Matina

Praying for you to find the strength to say yes to what the Lord is asking. And a reminder that it's not in your strength but leaning fully on the power and grace He provides. -Matina

@@adventuringwithjesus ❤️🙏

Glad it brought encouragement <3 -Matina

This was completely a lifestyle change and one that only came for me through the process of my faith journey. I had tried multiple diet plans, weight loss programs and ways to make healthy eating a lifestyle for years with no sustained success. Understanding it wasn't about the food rather a full heart and mindset shift. For me, my faith and relationship with God and choosing to put my entire life (including food choices) under His authority - that's what made the difference. Just here to share my story and hope it encourages others who may also be struggling.

You are so welcome

Thank you for the encouragement - it is my hope to share again soon. This year has been a tough one for me personally and I've needed some time offline but planning to get back to this in the new year -Matina

Amen! First step is admitting and bringing Jesus in. Happy to connect more if you'd like - Matina@matinahawkins.com

I typically eat eggs, oatmeal and fruit for breakfast and lunch/dinner are protein (chicken, beef and ground turkey are my go-tos), potato or rice and veggies/salad. I have a couple of "go-to" recipes that are pretty quick and also some crockpot ones too which are helpful when I don't feel like really cooking. I do not eat anything with sugar, sweeteners or any type of flour (so not just gluten free, but nothing made with a flour based product - breads, pastas etc). Happy to share more specifics if you'd like - you can email me or DM me on IG. - Matina

@adventuringwithjesus you are the only one who actually broke it down to me and I thank you so much for that! It meant a lot to me! May God continue to Bless you and may you continue to strive on your amazing journey!...Again! I thank you so much

@@adventuringwithjesus wait!...so no potato chips😪lol

Thank you so much for the encouragement. This has been a rough year personally and some of my food habits have slipped because of that - not relapse - but I know that I have allowed habits and mindsets to shift back to a not fully surrenderedplace. I am so grateful for the grace of God in the journey and for the foundation of recovery that has allowed me to weather this year without relapsing. Control is such a slippery slope - although the reality is our will is probably always battling for control to some extent. Every time I get on here and see comments like this - it's a reminder of the power of our testimony - even to ourselves. So thank you for reminding me of that and hope you have a blessed holiday! <3

I did not go to a recovery center. No extra "fees" or programs in that sense. I mean yes - eating with clean, fresh foods definitely can be more costly than the dollar menu at a fast food restaurant. And the convenience of picking something up versus cooking for yourself is different. But in terms of being able to afford it - it really doesn't need to cost monetarily anything more than you are already paying. And honestly - making these changes is so much less money than I shelled out in various diet programs that provided meals. It definitely takes more thought and intention because you actually have to pay attention to ingredients and they sneak sugar into so much food it's insane. The recovery community I joined was free and online as are most 12 step type communities. Happy to answer any questions either here or via email -Matina@matinahawkins.com

You are so welcome. Glad that my testimony can be an encouragemnt to others -Matina