Відео

I would love fly out and fucking meet you brother. My wife is leaving after 18 years and 5 kids later . Yes it was both our faults but i watched it unfold like an asshole ! We are still living together because i have been the soul provider for all of this time. She just start a job on monday , her plan is to move out soon as she can afford. Just i would love to fix my Marriage and save my family of course. But i need to fucking save myself first in order to do anythjng ! Even if i cant save my Marriage, then i can save myself and be the father my childeren need and be a better, stronger man for my future wife ! I would absolutely love to come out where your at and attend your classes ! Where ever i need to start i will. If i have to start from where im at first to see if im a conadent for you ill do it. Im ready to take fucking charge of my life and get out of this whole ! Ive started working out daily at the gym , trying to focus on me and th4 kids, but i find myself waiting for her text, her call, looking fot validation from her still. She still talks to me a lot when were home together , yes its a little bit of a different level but my brain believes things are going to be alright and i know there not ok ! But my mind keeps fucking with me! I think i need some time away from her some how. Yes the ideal thing would be to not live together . But thats not here yet. And i want to kick her out but then apart of me thinks that isnt right. Lots of questions , but i want turn the reality of this pain into power and strength. Been watching your content for days now! I do good for a day , maybe hours, then i fall apart inside. I need to end this cycle. Look forward to all you have to offer.

Exactly what I want to avoid- I would bring it straight to her attention. Never again will I be second.

Why would you want your wife back? Lol

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I finally figured out that allowing youreself to go straight through the "things" instead of avoiding them, makes it way easier in the long run to understand and deal with them.

My wife isnt coming back. Been a month, she is a cold one.

Its been about a month, my wife has been planning to leave for at least a year. She turned into a cold hearted slefish person. She got on social media and has this fanicy life in her her head. We went from making 20 G's a year, tht was my income, living off assitance etc. She never worked she raised the kids, to know i make 130 G's a year an we live comfortable. On 10 arcers. We drifted apart me working so much, she wants to move out with her new little job making 2 G's a month abd live on housing and assistance and food stamps. Lol like are you fucking kidding me !? She is chacing the life she had when i meat her. 20 years ago. Like why go backwords. Unbelievable. I guess being single and sleeping with who ever is the key to life these days. Not thr family life. Our 4 kids are so upset. I have tried everythjbg to fix us, nothing i say matters. So no in at the stage of trying to let go. But she still lives with me and still sleeps in our bed together. Still hugs me an says i love you but doesnt want to fix us? So confusing. Im to the point where i want to kick her out. I am stikl taking care of her.

Wow this video just slapped me right in the face.

Why even care

What's odd is that when I stopped trying to win my wife back, she was drawn to me.

Dam brother you just made it so fucking clear to me ! Just got dumped after 18 years and 4 kids later! Fuck thank you brother !

She already made it clear to me that she won't be coming back to me ever. She blocked me on everything. I need to move on now.

Please make more videos.

Fixing your own traumas and weaknesses wont fix hers. Fixing yourself wont fix the dynamic she might come back only to stroke her ego and try to poke you to see if you will bow down to her manipulations - again for personal gain - once you hold boundaries and no longer submit - she will have to take accountability for her toxic behaviours and their trauma. They will never admit and deflect-blame on you again. Which will never end well. Relationship is between 2 people and both play a part in this. As I said "fixing" yourself can only make you realise how unhealthy your wife or girlfriend is. You cant give her self-awarness and you cant unteach her of her projections. Going back is still being unhealed trying to prove her or yourself that you are "worthy". No amount of self-improvment on your part can make a selfish narcisistic or bpd ex not being selfish or teach her what healthy love is - thats her responsibility not yours - exactly becouse you feed into this bias that fixing the relationship, her emotions or making her happy is your responsibility or that "you are the problem" is why most men are at that place right now. The moment you realise you dont need her approval is the moment you dont want her either. Unless you want to go back and be constantly reminded how unhappy she is and how that is YOUR PROBLEM trying to change yourself for someone who doesnt have the ability to see you or appriciate you for who you are on a deeper level and never will.

Most of the time we only want them back because of pride and ego, some guys its pure scarcity because they don't think they can find someone else. I'm a firm believer that once a woman leaves you never let her back in. If you weren't weak or needy after the breakup and you just let her go with apathy, they'll usually try to come back months or even years later after they've been ran through. Once another man penetrates a woman I dated she's dead to me. Can't look at her the same way again.

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For these guys, it might actually take going through the divorce, and your now ex wife getting run through for a few years before she comes back to you. Would you still want her back?

Interesting you got some sort of moving forward ideas/advice to all raised points but #2 where you're just merely stating facts.

You nailed it brother when you said: "Your not here to save your marriage, your here to save yourself". George Bruno (from Liston my Son channel) always says this as well. Love your work brother!

Ed is really hitting his stride in these vids. Bravo!

Hello gentlemens, I'm a woman and came across this video while I'm healing from an avoidant man discard and looking for different resources to help in my recovery. I see there are men and women treating their ex partners like disposable toys which makes me sick. I blocked my ex, went 100% no contact and got rid of all the things which could remind me of him. I don't know if grass is greener for him because I am not asking around. I strongly believe in Karma and I pray for all of us who got treated like crap for not apparent reason. Those peoples behaviour has nothing to do with our value but everything to do with their character, insecurities, traumas, narcs traits and attachment styles.

Nailed it to the t

I sent this to my soon to be ex wife. What do you think? I’m not angry. Double gaslight. Even triple. We had a bad connection( that’s complete bs) Sorry you feel that way( invalidating and manipulate) Well you seemed angry( gaslight blame shifting). It’s insane. Please stop treating me like that. I know you’re hurt by me. It hurts to be treated like that constantly. We can’t have a normal talk, you can’t with anyone if you run that game on them. After being back and looking at it i understand why it used to feel like i was in the twilight zone when we would try and talk and could never resolve things together and grow. I would try and speak love compassion and understanding, and it was met with manipulation because you feel i was trying to do the same with you. I’m calling this out because i really want to heal it. I guess somewhere along the way it must have shifted there, i don’t think it was always like that. Have a good day. I hope you feel better!❤️‍🩹

Tried vulnerability, she wasn’t interested. Tried reducing her stress. Made no difference. Sometimes women make up stories to mask their true motives. Imagine that.

"Like what, if it was that important to you, why do you let it get to this point?"

Eh.. realise you dodged a bullet and that you are free. And time heals, like withdrawal from drugs, eventually the chemicals in your brain will stabilise, the pain will be gone and you’ll feel normal. Enjoy your own time and space.. doesn’t really get much better than that.

Great video

The world is messed up. If a woman leaves because you ain’t good enough, let her go. She ain’t worth it

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3:27 good short “you’re not the one who needs to fix her problems. You’ve just got to be the facilitator of her fixing her own problems through her talk think”

❤❤❤

6:00 what word is Ed saying? Lust vs lessless???

3:07

Maybe a service that elderly women could do would be to play mother to those men who need mother energy, and never had a good mother.

In a balanced gospel, we show how they heal too. Being a savior isn’t moral failure, it’s a failure of correct understanding of the situation. Self healing, and boundaries are prerequisite to giving the substances that is needed for both to heal.

Pretty tuff to hear. Getting back my masculinity and confidence is my goal. Lies, deceit, infidelity and manipulation were an integral part of my marriage for 17 years. I seem to be typical in this scenario and have learned a very hard lesson in love, never let go of yourself. Manipulation was the key strategy at the beginning to break my boundaries s. Now I know what the hell it looks, tastes and smells like. Thanks Ed, great advice!

0:58 Guilt Tripping 2:38 Call it Out 3:50 Dive in 4:12 Gaslighting5:00Observe behavior6:55 7:40 7:53Emotional Frzeout8:40 compliance 9:29 Contempt 10:09 ignoring/tolerate 11:13 stand up for urself/dont allow 12:00 Never Their Fault12:38 13:55 over time

Stay single. The juice ia not worth the squeeze. No human needs that kind of aggravation .

Stay single. Only benefit of women is having children. If you want them. They will only bring you down.

I, as a man, prefer to live my life in solitude, which dually means that no woman is in it. It's a beautiful and peaceful thing!

Spot on

its not only manipulation the guild tripping and all those "tactics" healthy woman don't do. Cluster-b woman do it. Woman without self-love and self-worth do it. But you cant prevent it. Staying and defending yourself wont help change the behaviour becouse she is not self-aware of her own traumas. Poiting it out wont help it will only create more drama which you will be blamed for becouse they will never take responsibility. The only way do defend yourself is regognize it and leave the """"relationship"""" no metter how much you care. Your vulnerability and your care is the thing they use to gain control. Theyr values on right and wrong are not the same as yours. They are willing to take advantage of other people for theyr own personal gain which is narcissistic to say at least. If your love is used against you to serve her own agenda, that is not love its abuse on many levels. Being dominant is not standing up for yourself all the time ina power struggle manipulative relationship. Her view of relationships will alywas be about control not love and mutual connection and vulnerability. In other words no metter what you do you cant "change" her or stop her from doing it becouse its part of her patology. You cannot love her trauma away neither you can teach her what healthy love is. Thats my take on that.

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So treat her like sparring partner and dont show any sign that her jabs hurt? This is brilliant approach but for how many rounds do ypu need to have stamina? Till discard. Really good stuff man thank you

This work when you want to get rid of her and you dont know how. Just play desperate and beg her to stay. Problem solved.

These videos are just absolute gold

You such a blessing my brother. Thank you

I don't care why she cheated the point is that she did

My wife has the guilt trip and power/control thing nailed. I've been the nice guy for waaay too long.

This is so clearly conveyed. I don't know what I'm able to understand these so much I've heard them all many times over the years but I finally feel like I have a grip on these. And it hurts.