Відео

GIRL I RELATE TO YOU AAAAAAA!!!!! I have left so many friendships because i felt betrayed when my best friend wanted more friends. I got diagnosed with bpd lol

As a child I wanted to fit in at first, and play football, I soon found I couldn't fit in or play football, not knowing why but resolving that, thats how it's going to be, but I was always blessed with one or two close friends who were neurotypical, and I think they must have a unique quality to be able to befriend someone like me and see through surface.

Im about to rewatch this video because i feel like you just explained me life and how i think. Im currently pursuing an autism diagnosis, and i have alwayssss struggled with black and white thinking

This is funny, one of my interests is people. Ithe observational trait of autistic people but to the max. I love knowing people so my issue in conversation is people who don't open up about anything. I don't care if eventually I can read you like a book. Like it feels like you're talking to a brick wall. The way I see conversations is. Theres a box for us too fill. I fill it with things then stop, then the other person fills its with things then stops. And we keep bouncing back and forth between terms. I get really anxious when the other person is not taking their turn to talk. Yeah I can keep talking on and on and on about certain things but after a while in my head I think man I've given a lot of room for you to fill the box why don't you say something, anything????? You could say something about the weather like speak PLEASE XD. And I can sit in silence but I never know if the other person is comfortable with that at all so idk how I come off being totally mute. Not knowing makes me break out into stimming.

I've felt that soo hard. I'll make a friend and then meet their friends and just feel so tense. I don't mind because we all know many people but I don't want to meet your people, I want to meet with you. I think I am a lot more open when there is no pressure for me to be friends with people I don't know. If I need to be in the same room with my friends friend yeah sure but if you're expecting me to leave the function with new friends bro I am leaving ngl.

The only way I know someone wants to be my friend is if they talk to me. If we generally don't talk and I pretty much have to force you to talk to me then we're strangers. And i'm ngl it pisses me off now even more than realizing this in the past. Makes me hate small talk even more. Idk what it is about me but some people really gravitate towards me and I get tricked because of the social situation in public. They genuinely lie and behave like a decent friend to your face but outside of that it's like they treat you like a nobody. I have to force them to say anything to me if at all. If you only show up for me when social pressure demands it get away from me, you're not my friend. I don't take ANYONE serious anymore unless they behave in a way that demands I should take them serious.

I have suffered with this from a young age and then Trichotillomania since Uni (I'm now 50 and awaiting an Autism assessment). Very relatable. Thank you for sharing ❤

That pyramid was very helpful 🌸

Hello! I have been this way my entire life. You are the first Autistic person who has communicated this to me.

Hello! I loved this video. Is there any chance you would consider making an abbreviated video on this topic that might be good to show teens? I am a speech therapist and I am working with a young teen who has a lot of trouble making friends. He is feeling sort of hopeless and I am searching for videos by autistic people to show that he is not alone in the struggle. BTW, I am working with his neurotypical friend in therapy to help them communicate about what autism is like. We are working with neurodiversity and acceptance :)

It's definitely one of the more difficult parts of autism. I think there ARE people out there who 'get it' and who want to connect in the same way we do.

I relate so much to this video. Especially with not knowing where friend zones lie and relying on my sister heavily for friendships. She’s 15 months older and we have a lot in common. She was overprotective of me and combined with my social anxiety, we’d always be together. I would rely on her friends to make my own friends. I didn’t ask, or hope that she would move out of the picture though. But she’d befriend them and I’d weasel my way in because to her, we were a packaged deal. I wouldn’t say much though and for some reason still considered us to be close friends since that was their bond with my sister. I recently confided in her that our childhood friends that we had for many years were really just her friends. She tried to deny it, but I know better and I doubt I could be convinced. I don’t blame them though. I hardly said a peep all those many years of hanging out. I was always too anxious despite being around them so much

Thank you so much for making this video ❤️

i’m so glad you’re talking about this 🌸 i’m old and only just beginning to figure this stuff out; largely through others putting out this type of content (also the only reason i now know i’m audhd). you and others talking about things that some people (like me!😁) never thought anyone but themselves had problems with/trauma about is SO HELPFUL 🌸

Thankyou so much for your vulnerability

This was EXCELLENT. I am so glad you made this video. You brought up so many things that I have not heard anyone else bring up, and I can relate to all of it. And I bet you are an awesome friend to your friends.

maintain *5* troy ounces of *gold* , *200* troy ounces of *silver* , *0.01* of *bitcoin* *nuff said*

Too be honest I am just terrible at making friends and always make things worst even though I have autism I always have a hard time socializing with people and I am sometimes shy and nervous to meet people but I always screw up and end up with the wrong people 😭

It’s like you read my biography! Your experience was so similarly aligned to my own. I remember going from middle school to high school and all of my friends I had made went to a completely different school so I was alone and ate alone during lunch. I spent most of my time wandering the library and reading as that’s my special interest, I didn’t make any friends until my 3rd year of high school. I vividly remember coming home and being upset that I was alone and that others made fun of me for being separate or for missing so many days of school so I didn’t get reminded that I was lonely. I have returned to college at 30 now and the amount of people, noise and atmosphere is overbearing. I am gritting my teeth through it as I know my limits and what I will entertain but it’s still tumultuous at times.

Not knowing the stages of friendships is literally what broke me last year & it's the main reason I started therapy. There were 3 people that I invited to my birthday last year & none of them showed up. The next day, I went into deep depression. It was the darkest depression I'd ever been in. I lost my identity, lost interest in everything I loved, & needed medication for 6 months to get back to feeling like myself again. That was the 3rd year that I had invited people & no one came. It hurt. Recently, my therapist brought up that I could be autistic & is helping me get an assessment. I relate with every point you brought up. Past friends were my sisters friends or exes friends or classmates, but I always got attached quickly because they were nice & apparently as much as I thought I was giving, I wasn't giving/social enough. It really is overwhelming, tiring, & getting more difficult to mask in my 30s

I'm crying, I'm 21 and I have no friends

Friends are over-rated and too often a trust liability that's not worth the risk. I'd say just find a good therapist if you need to talk about deeper things, otherwise keep it surface/casual and objective or activity-based. This is just my own opinion on the matter.

Please

I want one.

I-I want to be your friend!

Thanks for doing this video i can relate to a good few things u said. I hope ur doing well :)

Male, 35, only figured out I’m autistic 12 months ago - it has answered so much about my life and how I am that it’s frankly upsetting how much of my life I now know I have struggled through. Discovering the vibrant support community online has been so great, just hearing others with the same issues is vindication in itself

I'm a Trans woman and I relate to all of this. I remember years ago I was 'making friends' with a group of people and one of them mentioned to me that it was weird that people I met 5 minutes ago I treat like a lifelong friend. I made friends with fellow weirdos all the time. It was hard to make friends with anyone I felt was too normal. I don't even know what it is specifically but it just always felt like a barrier between me and most people where at best I could mimic behaviors at them to have a good relationship with them but I just never developed that switch from not really caring about someone to best friend.

Very true

So true😢 .. I think I blew a lot people bc I just don’t understand these friendship levels

I’d rather have no friends at all than have an autistic friend, period.

i love this so much, you are so well educated on the differences between autism in women and men, something which is unfortunately really UNDERresearched (is that a word?). I am also autistic and this video helped me in so many ways, please keep doing what you are doing, the world needs more autistic women/queer people speaking out about their experience.

So does being autistic mean you’re sociopathic? Because that’s what it sounds like.

Friendships are one difficulty of mine as well.

Thanks for a very interesting video!👌 Please make a video about alcohol and autism too. Love to see your take on it😊

I've also always had only one close friend at a time, which I guess is bad because I was relying on them too much, if they couldn't be there I'd be completely alone, same for when our friendship ended. I guess it also places too much pressure on the other person, to be "the ultimate friend", I want to try keeping multiple connections in the future but it's so hard to find even one

😽💓💕

Thank you so much for sharing your story

Not all autistic people can drive. I barely can. Please remember level 2s and 3s when you are educating people.

It can't happen during birth. It is our brain structure. Not a chemical imbalance. It is our neurons and structure. It happens when our brain is formed. Not when we are born. This drives me nuts.

"When you just met somebody you wouldn't tell them all your darkest secrets and true confessions and expect to be having sleep overs right away". ....Oops. Yeah once I decide I accept someone I let my walls down to them fully and it freaks people out.

Resonate a lot with this. Thank you for sharing your thoughts 🙏

Hi, this video was really helpful for me. I'm considering just self diagnosing, and I had no idea friendships were such a big part of autism. I literally have no friends. I'm okay with it now, I'm 28, but it's always been confusing and your video was me to a T growing up 😭 I feel so seen

Thanks for this video. Videos like this that I strongly relate to are helping me figure out that I should probably seek an assessment for myself, although it seems comlpicated and expensive where I live.

Love it, thank you!!!!! I personally love move decks. Madame web is going to be wild

no friends

Thanks for sharing, good video. I’m married with two children but still struggle with creating, maintaining friendships, and communication.

I agree with almost everything! Except for that conversations with autistics are bad or one-worded :( I've had the best conversations with other autistics but maybe some autistics are like that

Oooh boy this is so relatable especially when you mentioned the whole not understanding the friendship stages. Been there. Also one other thing I think my autism does is makes the reality of situations super apparent and takes me out of finding them fun. Like I can immediately tell that a theme park is mostly cash grabs and a bunch of glitz and glamour for cheap trinkets and overpriced food. Or that parties are full of people getting horribly drunk and risky situations and way too much noise. Or eating out is just sometimes out of budget or hard to find food everyone wants to eat. Like this really kills the amount of things I want to do with people and makes it hard to find things to do so I can keep my friends around. 😅 I’m a homebody through and through.

Excellent presentation! Thank You!