Відео

I'm crying, I'm 21 and I have no friends

Friends are over-rated and too often a trust liability that's not worth the risk. I'd say just find a good therapist if you need to talk about deeper things, otherwise keep it surface/casual and objective or activity-based. This is just my own opinion on the matter.

Please

I want one.

I-I want to be your friend!

Thanks for doing this video i can relate to a good few things u said. I hope ur doing well :)

Male, 35, only figured out I’m autistic 12 months ago - it has answered so much about my life and how I am that it’s frankly upsetting how much of my life I now know I have struggled through. Discovering the vibrant support community online has been so great, just hearing others with the same issues is vindication in itself

I'm a Trans woman and I relate to all of this. I remember years ago I was 'making friends' with a group of people and one of them mentioned to me that it was weird that people I met 5 minutes ago I treat like a lifelong friend. I made friends with fellow weirdos all the time. It was hard to make friends with anyone I felt was too normal. I don't even know what it is specifically but it just always felt like a barrier between me and most people where at best I could mimic behaviors at them to have a good relationship with them but I just never developed that switch from not really caring about someone to best friend.

Very true

So true😢 .. I think I blew a lot people bc I just don’t understand these friendship levels

I’d rather have no friends at all than have an autistic friend, period.

i love this so much, you are so well educated on the differences between autism in women and men, something which is unfortunately really UNDERresearched (is that a word?). I am also autistic and this video helped me in so many ways, please keep doing what you are doing, the world needs more autistic women/queer people speaking out about their experience.

So does being autistic mean you’re sociopathic? Because that’s what it sounds like.

Friendships are one difficulty of mine as well.

Thanks for a very interesting video!👌 Please make a video about alcohol and autism too. Love to see your take on it😊

I've also always had only one close friend at a time, which I guess is bad because I was relying on them too much, if they couldn't be there I'd be completely alone, same for when our friendship ended. I guess it also places too much pressure on the other person, to be "the ultimate friend", I want to try keeping multiple connections in the future but it's so hard to find even one

😽💓💕

Thank you so much for sharing your story

Not all autistic people can drive. I barely can. Please remember level 2s and 3s when you are educating people.

It can't happen during birth. It is our brain structure. Not a chemical imbalance. It is our neurons and structure. It happens when our brain is formed. Not when we are born. This drives me nuts.

"When you just met somebody you wouldn't tell them all your darkest secrets and true confessions and expect to be having sleep overs right away". ....Oops. Yeah once I decide I accept someone I let my walls down to them fully and it freaks people out.

Resonate a lot with this. Thank you for sharing your thoughts 🙏

Hi, this video was really helpful for me. I'm considering just self diagnosing, and I had no idea friendships were such a big part of autism. I literally have no friends. I'm okay with it now, I'm 28, but it's always been confusing and your video was me to a T growing up 😭 I feel so seen

Thanks for this video. Videos like this that I strongly relate to are helping me figure out that I should probably seek an assessment for myself, although it seems comlpicated and expensive where I live.

Love it, thank you!!!!! I personally love move decks. Madame web is going to be wild

no friends

Thanks for sharing, good video. I’m married with two children but still struggle with creating, maintaining friendships, and communication.

I agree with almost everything! Except for that conversations with autistics are bad or one-worded :( I've had the best conversations with other autistics but maybe some autistics are like that

Oooh boy this is so relatable especially when you mentioned the whole not understanding the friendship stages. Been there. Also one other thing I think my autism does is makes the reality of situations super apparent and takes me out of finding them fun. Like I can immediately tell that a theme park is mostly cash grabs and a bunch of glitz and glamour for cheap trinkets and overpriced food. Or that parties are full of people getting horribly drunk and risky situations and way too much noise. Or eating out is just sometimes out of budget or hard to find food everyone wants to eat. Like this really kills the amount of things I want to do with people and makes it hard to find things to do so I can keep my friends around. 😅 I’m a homebody through and through.

Excellent presentation! Thank You!

I was told by a psychologist that autistic people don’t have empathy. I described picking up others feelings and energy that make me exhausted.

❤

Bodylanguage is easy, if you bought the right book and leaned the right things.

Thanks for this. Waiting for my ASD assessment. Any advice on what to do when friends don't return your messages?

I was diagnosed with severe ocd onset age 7 then bpd and now my GP thinks I may be on the spectrum and advised me to seek a private assessment. It's like a light bulb going off right now watching this, Thank you x

This is my first video of yours. I'm stunned at how accurately you've described my experiences. You had me at the beginning when you talked about the stages of friendship, knowing what they are, but not understanding where you are in the stages. Like you, I meet someone, geek connected and then share/dump on them all of my deepest feelings. I'm 66, a retired F. And, i struggle with understanding how someone could need others in their life because of COURSE I should be their end all and be all! (sarcasm). Then I feel rejected. That's something I completely obsess about. The last little thing causes me to feel rejected. Thank you so much for this video.

I know exactly how you feel in every way.

This hurt to watch! This helped me to understand my struggles with socializing even when on the surface I seem to be really good at it.

I found this to be well-organized, clearly articulated and informative - I appreciate your insight.

I can relate so much to this! I'm struggling to make friends and always have. During childhood I felt so left out in school and I didn't know how to connect to people. I wasn't interested in talking about the same things and I've realized I was dissociating because I had issues with eye contact and to talk to strangers. It's very hard for me to feel safe. It feels like everyone's judging me. I think that's the black and white thinking. I felt rejected because I was so different.

Omg-im 57 and have never had anyone describe ME LIKE THIS BEFORE.

Very informative video. Im also autistic, but a guy, these are all true. Decided to subscribe to your channel!! Thanks for sharing!

I so appreciate you didnt edit out the part where im pretty sure you forgot what you were saying and had a few different facial expresssions and im so glad i noticed because it was really validating as I do this and usually im embarrassed. Also yes to wanting to punch people.

more then special friend ? 🤣🤭🤫😉😘

great video! I'd love to hear more thoughts on interpersonal stuff like how you feel about breaking into a current conversation. I'm often meek and that leads to people talking over me

Yeah, I remember when I tried seeking diagnosis, I was told “I don’t think you have autism because you want friends.” That was so frustrating.

I think it’s easier to make friends when you surround yourself with others who share your special interests. One expression that I find helpful is that sometimes people are friends for a reason, a season, a lifetime. So you might have some people who are friends with you because you’re all going through a situation and so you bond for that reason. These people may or may not evolve into a deeper friendship. Then there are others who share something for a long time. A good example is moms in the neighbourhood who have children the same age. If there are other common interests, those friendships may evolve. But if there isn’t other commonalities, then when your children graduate and move away, the mom groups often dissolve. This is friendship for a season. Either of the first two groups or even random people who don’t seem to have anything in common can become a lifetime friend. These ones are rare. These are the people you can call at 3:00 am and they will answer the phone. Those friends are one or two in a lifetime. Neurotypical people tend to call everyone friends but those people are more likely acquaintances, reasons and seasons people. Neuro-diverse people are only really interested in the lifetime type, the kind who don’t even feel like people, the kind you can sit in silence with. So I keep the phrase reasons, seasons and lifetime in my head. That way, I’m less often offended by the shallowness of a conversation. Some people go to deep conversations quickly, those are more likely to be the lifetime people.

Mmmm pass. I'm good.

I can absolutely read people so far as if they're sheisty or unsafe, but do I have a clue if they think I'm cool or want to be my friend? Hell no, not a bit. As long as I'm outside looking in, and not a part of the interaction, I can read intentions and all that stuff so accurately. Maybe in my case part of my issue is how much thought I have to put into being in the interaction that I miss everything else.

On body language: When everyone around you is Daft Punk.