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MAH MAH.. I am looking Across.. Standing by the Gates.. with the three Friends.. as the Back of the Palace Guards.. I am looking at YOU.. and so many people has gathered.. ALL of the TOP Generals.. the Commanders.. the Head servant.. maids.. even the Highest Kitchen Lady.. and ALL of the Special Body Guards.. the servants and I can hear a Great Celebration.. on the Outer Court.. I am watching YOU.. looking through the gate Bars.. I am wondering.. what is going to Happen after this.. WILL I able to still love YOU.. Look at the place I am standing.. and my three friends who are standing next to me sees Me.. I am sad.. My Heart is broken because NOW.. it is so Hard to Love YOU.. of Course I should be the One who should be the Most happiest to support YOU.. I know that it was ME who told YOU to leave.. to GO.. to go back to the Palace because It is the King.. PEH HA is calling.. He wanted to show YOU and give YOU something.. I was so Happy to hear this News.. that something Great was going to Happen.. and I am now Sad.. NOT sad in a Bad way.. I am just so sad because of this Distance.. I want to come Close.. I want to be near YOU.. able to hold Your Hands.. able to be close and to tell YOU at least I miss YOU.. or say I love YOU.. YOU don't have to accept the Words but.. If I were able to get closer to YOU.. at least YOU are able to feel the energy.. able to see me Smile.. but.. NOW.. I feel like only looking at the MOON can be more closer than for me to LOOK at YOU.. I am looking through the Bar Gate.. as I am watching the People.. the Most important People.. even the Prime Minister has come.. also the Queen.. the People all lowers and falls to the Floor.. QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. people all shouts on the floor.. lowering as she walks.. YOUR Mother has come and Me with the three friends all hit the Floor.. even though she can't see us.. knowing that the QUEEN has COME.. there is a Throne Seat.. in the Middle.. but a stage which YOU are on.. and Now the Messenger Shouts Out.. PEH HA!! the King is Coming.. the KING has come.. PEH HA! and all the people shouts Loud.. PEH HA! and me with the three friends shouts together PEH HA! and the King says for the attendants.. all rise UP and every one stands UP on the two feet.. so me and the three Friends all get UP.. the King is on the Outer Court.. and there is stairs.. He looks at YOU.. HE is with tears in his Eyes looking at YOU.. and there is a Big Crown.. and as the King steps UP He tells YOU to sit on the Throne.. and I look.. It can't be.. and He places a Crown ON the TOP of Your Head.. and He looks at YOU.. kisses Your Hand and says.. Now the CROWN PRINCESS.. SOON to Lead.. SOON to take over the Place.. and everyone Falls ON to the Floor.. lowers all.. and Says CROWN PRINCESS.. I am On the Floor.. with the three Friends.. HWANGTAEJABI.. WANGSEJABI.. MAH MAH.. and every one shouts.. YOU sit there very shock.. but We all knew that IN time YOU will become the TOP RULER for the Nation.. People cheers and shouts Out.. WANGSEJABI.. CROWN PRINCESS.. we honor YOU.. the Commanders comes and they take a Bow to YOU.. kneeling and lower the Heads.. to the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. the Crown Princess.. and Each Man comes to kiss your hand.. few Commanders.. the TOP 1st Chief Generals line UP.. to the 2nd In command of Chief Generals.. to the 3rd in command of Chief Generals.. and the Lower top generals and I am watching.. this is the Most biggest celebration.. very close of becoming the Ruler.. and I am falling looking on the floor.. What am I suppose to DO.. One side of my Heart.. I am truly joyful.. and I am so Happy for YOU.. I knew in time YOU would become the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. I would feel so happy that Now you are going to be taking over.. even though there is NO crown Prince.. but YOUR FATHER.. PEH HA made that calling.. Knowing that YOU are ready.. I am looking at the King and the Queen.. both lower themselves before YOU.. I am in shock.. It is PEH HA and HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and they made this Happen.. Now.. On the Other side.. I am watching all of these Most important people who works for the King.. they are all going over kissing Your hand.. I see a long Line and I would be on this Position till the Sun Goes Down.. and I see YOU still sitting on that Throne with the Crown TOP of your Head.. as I am hearing foot steps.. and it stops by the gate door bar.. I know someone is coming.. Is it my turn to kiss Your Hand.. If I kiss your hand.. I know that I can't love YOU any more.. what about me.. What about my Heart.. WILL you still let me Love YOU even after I kiss YOUR HAND.. I want to know.. will you let me still come close.. because I told YOU that I did not want to Come.. I knew that THIS would happen.. I told you before.. when We were back at the garden.. up on the Hill side by the tree.. I told YOU to let me stay Alone.. that I did Not want to go with YOU.. that I told my friends to take YOU instead.. because I knew that this is going to happen to Me.. WHY are you making my Heart to Bleed.. WHY don't you just give me a sharp blade knife and cut UP my stomach instead.. it be better if I just die like this.. I told YOU that YOU SHOULD go alone.. and I know that YOU wanted me to see YOU and to join in the celebration.. Yes.. it is the Best day I see.. it is the greatest day I am feeling at One side.. that Now.. YOU are the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI.. MAH MAH.. but the next thing I want to know.. what am I suppose to do with my Heart.. I have been loving you for so Long.. I mean it has been such a very long time.. and I began to think.. if it is all about MAH MAH.. WANGSEJABI.. the Crown Princess.. YOU becoming the Next Ruler.. I told you that I did not want to come because the Distance is going to push me far away from YOU.. that is why leaving me behind would been a great idea because my eyes seeing YOU Close is good but bad when I can't ever come close to YOU.. DO YOU KNOW how much I love YOU.. DO you know that I love you so much that I did decide to join.. decided to see this Celebration.. NOW My heart is breaking inside because I know there will be Distance between US.. but able to see YOU close.. but loving YOU far hurts me far more than FOR me being at the Garden.. on the TOP of the HILL side by the tree been better because at least I don't have to see YOU.. it is the same feeling because of the distance.. it kills me more that I can't love YOU.. it kills me even more that I want to love YOU.. but How.. HOW can I love YOU when YOU are the CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI.. MAH MAH.. Please tell me How.. I hear the Bar Gates Opening.. and the Messenger is standing there.. telling me to get UP.. and the four of Us all get up.. the Crown Princess is calling is what the Messenger is telling.. the three of the friends started to walk forward.. But I stop.. I am not going to walk over.. I can't kiss YOUR HAND if I can't love YOU.. I rather NOT go and just turn the Other way.. the Messenger stops and turns to look at me.. the Crown Princess is waiting.. HWANGTAEJABI.. MAH MAH is waiting for YOU.. but I would not make any move.. I can't go.. I don't want to walk over and kiss Your hand.. and If my Heart cannot love you any more.. Just please END my life here.. I rather DIE.. and the Special Body Guards walks over.. One pulls out the Sword to my Neck.. and He wants to strike me on the Neck with the Blade of the sword.. and I hear the voice.. the sword be place down.. I turn to look over.. as I look over.. the Important people all lowers and goes to the Floor as YOU stand UP from the Throne and YOU are looking at me.. I see the Big Crown placed.. and I am waiting for YOU to End my Life.. I know that I can't kiss Your Hand.. WHAT happens to me.. HOW about my Heart.. if YOU are going to HURT ME and kill My Heart.. KILL me first.. I am always ready to Die for YOU.. and I see YOU walking down the stairs from the Stage and three friends all stops and turns too look at me.. If I cannot even Love YOU.. what is the Point of me living.. I did not come all the way here to Just kiss Your Hand.. I came here to celebrate with YOU.. it is the Most Beautiful Day but How about Me.. How about my Love.. How about me Loving YOU.. If I can't love YOU now.. I can't love you later.. because it will turn Out to be Never.. that is why I choose to be still here.. How about Me.. tell Me.. give me the answer first.. I rather turn the Other way.. I will go back to the Garden where I belong in the first place.. where I should stayed in the first place.. If this was going to happen.. I do not know why I came all the way down here to cause trouble.. I don't mean to cause any kind of trouble.. because MY true intention is also celebrate.. but IF it ends this Way.. and YOU are forcing me to Kiss Your Hand so that I can't love you any more.. I am telling YOU now I will not.. I will Not kiss YOUR HAND.. so Please.. Let me GO back to the place where I belong.. Maybe I don't belong here any more because NOW.. I have reached a Point.. I can die.. If I can't love YOU.. Please let me go to see my Family.. I can meet them on the Other side.. since I know now I can't love YOU.. and My tears begins to roll down.. YOU know that I am badly hurt right Now.. YOU know that It hurts if I can't love YOU.. it hurts even missing YOU but to stand here for the rest of My life.. just to look at YOU but can't never love YOU.. I can't.. WHY did you even bring me to this Place if YOU knew it was going to end UP like this.. If you would of told me if YOU Knew this was to happen.. I would of chosen to Be at the Garden.. be close to the Buried family members.. I am not trying to start anything.. Not a war.. Not trying to bring any kind of Trouble.. but

MAH MAH.. YOU.. letting YOU know that I should of never come.. YES.. I do love that YOU are Now the CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI.. MAH MAH.. I am truly happy for YOU.. that YOU are going to be ruling soon.. I already told YOU it was going to happen., of course never thought this SOON though.. BUT it has happened.. If I walk over.. and YOU give me YOUR HAND.. and I kiss that Hand.. that means I can't ever love YOU.. I will not kiss YOUR hand if I just can't.. I rather turn My Head and look up to the Sky and LOOK at the MOON and just talk to that Moon thinking about YOU.. I have been asking the MOON like he be a friend and sharing.. How much I love YOU and how much I been praying to meet YOU and always wishing that I can meet YOU SOON.. that part it has come true.. but I started to fall for YOU.. maybe because It Hurts so Much I started to love YOU.. maybe it was because missing YOU TOO MUCH I started to Love YOU.. but just thinking about YOU.. it made My Heart to Fall in Love with YOU.. because YOU are the CROWN PRINCESS.. knowing that this was going to happen.. because of THIS.. because YOU are HWANGTAEJABI.. MAH MAH.. knowing YOU are the Best.. the greatest is why I loved YOU.. ever since I was a young Boy.. I knew that YOU were going to be someone very special.. and NOW I see.. my eyes are seeing.. that because YOU are.. that is why I rather just love YOU and Not kiss YOUR HAND.. I am looking at YOU.. as YOU are coming closer.. I see you walking and YOU stop.. as I tell YOU.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. Crown Princess.. Please do not come closer to Me.. I don't want to kiss YOUR hand.. I just can't.. because YOU know my Heart.. Please.. tell me rather to Leave the Palace.. stripe away my title.. and My Position.. I rather Live as a Slave Instead.. I don't deserve to Kiss Your Hand because I know My Heart.. I know How much I love YOU.. that is why I won't.. Please stop there and DO not come closer.. I rather walk away from the Outer Court.. and I would Hear.. the Queen is coming.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I see you turn the Other way.. the Queen in tears.. coming to Kiss Your Hand.. and I see her lips kiss.. putting YOU in charge of everything.. I would walk the ten Council of Noble Men walking and they all stop behind the Prime Minister of the Nation.. and I see the King.. who is on the Floor.. He is crying.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. YOU are Now the CROWN PRINCESS of this Nation.. HWANG WOO.. QUEEN.. come to me.. and I see the Queen turn around and she walks to her Husband as She also falls on the Floor.. with tears.. and I am standing there.. each Council of Noble MAN.. walking forward.. each Man comes to Kiss Your Hand.. and I am standing there.. My Heart is truly Touched.. truly Moved.. and I am standing thinking.. WHY can't I kiss Your Hand.. is it because it is My Pride.. WHO am I to tell YOU this.. WHO am I as the Lowly servant.. I am only the Palace Guard.. How can I reject Your Hand.. but It is because I love YOU.. I know that I must kiss but I know if I do.. I become Your Subject.. as I would watch each person kissing Your Hand and they Bow and lower to the Knees.. and LOOKING at the Big Crown on top of Your Head.. now the three of my friends goes over.. and Each of them decides to Kiss Your hand.. I am now standing alone.. if I don't kiss YOUR hand.. I know that I must leave this Palace.. this Outer Courts.. so I would turn to face the Gates.. I know that I must leave.. I just can't stand here any longer.. I just can't kiss Your hand and just become NO ONE to YOU.. and as I behind to walk down by myself.. the Special Body Guard runs.. and He stops me.. putting the Sword in front.. and I turn around and I still see YOU.. YOU just standing there.. with the White Dress.. SO beautiful.. WHY are you stopping Me.. I told you already that YOU are going to be a Great Ruler for the Nation.. Everyone gets on their Knees before YOU.. the Prime Minister.. the Commanders.. Chief Generals.. Generals.. the foot soldiers.. the Ten Council of Noble men.. all the Maid and servant.. EUNCH.. the Highest Kitchen Lady.. the Doctors of the Palace.. all falls before YOU.. shouting Out.. Crown Princess.. MANSAE.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. MANSAE.. HOORAY.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. MANSAE.. HOORAY and Tears are all falling.. saying the Next RULER coming UP and I would look at YOU.. my tears are flowing DOWN.. I am so Sad because HOW can I love YOU now.. LOOK at me.. I can't even do anything.. How can I love YOU now.. YOU are Now the CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. the CROWN PRINCESS of this Nation.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. and I would fall on both knees and start too weep in Pain.. I am aching because LOOK at me.. WHO AM I to love a CROWN PRINCESS like YOU.. and I am looking at the Ground.. wailing and Weeping loud.. I know that I am wrong.. I know that I should of never started but NOW to turn back.. it is just too late to turn.. I have come long ways of loving YOU.. and I am looking UP at the MOON.. WHY.. WHY did I even come.. if I could of stayed behind.. then It would not hurt me this Much because the Loving YOU always hurt but Now.. it hurts more.. I don't want to lose YOU.. because I know that I love YOU.. as I am would stand UP.. and I look toward the Gate.. and I started to walk.. passing the Gates.. I know that I can't come back.. I will remain as a Slave.. and I started to walk.. but.. this Special Body Guard keeps on following Me.. and Puts his sword to STOP me to go.. and I would turn.. I see YOU walking.. and coming closer as I am stopped by the Gates.. I am wondering.. YOU have everything here.. WHY are you doing this to me.. the more you do this.. the More I will be hurting in inside.. YOU know that I am little.. with such no Power.. I have no strength but YOU have all the strong People around YOU.. who also decided to choose YOU to be the CROWN PRINCESS.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. YOU have all the troops.. even the people all.. I would see the People.. common people.. they all fallen on the Floor.. and People.. the common people.. when they see YOU.. they would shout OUT with the loud VOICE.. MANSAE.. HOORAY.. CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. MANSAE.. HOORAY.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. and People are on the Floor.. on the knees looking at the ground.. and I am standing here.. SO touched.. winning the Hearts of many people.. in the Palace and Out with the Common people.. YOU have won as the Next and I know that YOU WILL DO great.. that is why Now.. YOU have no need for me to be here.. because YOU have taken the seat to RULE.. and I told YOU.. CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. I will not kiss Your hand.. if YOU are asking me to come.. and be your subject.. and wants me to kiss YOUR HAND.. that is why I rather leave.. I would live in the deep of the forest and into the mountains.. I will not be known to YOU anymore.. and I see YOU coming very closer.. and your hand touch my shoulder Blade.. and I hear the word Stay.. and I turn around to face YOU.. HOW can I stay with YOU if YOU want me to kiss that Hand.. I told you I just can't.. if YOU want me to be Your Subject.. I want to live a different life.. I can't spend the rest of my Life just standing here.. Unable to say.. unable to tell YOU How much I love YOU.. I am Not going to live the rest of my life.. just wishing because I just can't.. why.. if YOU are asking me why I can't.. Loving YOU is all I want.. Loving YOU is all I need and all I can do.. YOU can't change my Mind and can't change my Heart because I love you this Much.. and I just can't stand here.. becoming a Part of Your Subject unable to tell YOU.. and to show YOU how much I love YOU.. if I can't express my self.. I rather go.. I rather walk away so that I can move on further.. I rather be in the Mountains.. I rather be alone not seeing YOU.. even if it means to LOOK at that MOON above us.. If I can talk to that MOON about YOU.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. Crown Princess.. if just to tell that MOON how much I love YOU.. I rather be far missing YOU.. at least I can have my own Voice.. my own words to say it and tell it.. as Long as I can love YOU far.. it be hard because I be missing YOU from far.. but at least I can let my Voice be heard to that MOON.. so that It knows my Heart how much I love YOU.. I don't want to be standing here.. very near to YOU unable to speak about or to express.. I just can't live like this.. that is why I rather choose Far.. away and to Say it then.. that is why I am making the decision right Now.. to walk away for love.. I rather be far and to say.. to express it and even it means to speak to that MOON.. I am going to let my VOICE be heard by something or someone.. if it is Not YOU.. I would hear YOU and YOU saying something to Stay.. and the Special Body Guard tells me.. it means I don't have to Kiss Your hand.. and I am shocked.. How can I stay if I don't kiss Your hand.. everyone else has kissed your hand.. But why would you not let Me because I know there are so many eyes looking at Me.. they are going to go against Me if I don't kiss Your hand.. but YOU are telling me to stay and Not to kiss that Hand.. even the King.. PEH HA.. also the Prime Minister.. TAE SA JAH.. and the Queen.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I just saw with my eyes.. they came to give you that respect and Honor to rule.. and has shown me by kissing YOUR HAND.. even the Biggest people.. the Most important People has chosen to Kiss and has become your Subjects.. So I would fall on both knees before YOU and My Head looks on the floor.. CROWN PRINCESS.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I can't go inside because I am breaking the rules of this

MAH MAH.. How can YOU tell me to go and the rule is that only by kissing your Hand.. I am admitting it with highly regard and with honor and respect that YOU can rule over Me as Your Subject.. and ALL of the powerful people in that house.. they have come to YOU for you to RULE over them.. but YOU are letting me to slide.. I can't just slide.. I needs to be punish by the Law and needs to be punished severely.. I can't go inside if I do not take this Part of and I see the Three of my Friends coming and they have stopped behind YOU.. CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. the King.. PEH HA.. the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. they are asking for YOU.. a Banquet is going to be thrown inside.. they have send us to ask for YOU to come.. and I am Looking on the ground.. CROWN PRINCESS.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. Please go inside.. Your Parents are waiting for YOU and asking for Your presence.. I know that I cannot go inside like this.. and I see YOU.. your hand touches.. telling me to stay.. But.. I know that I must go.. and I would see you turn Your Head.. looking at my three friends and telling them to Go with me.. and I hear YOU say.. come back after.. it is a command YOU gave me.. and I am touched.. WHY would you do this.. WHY do you keep on doing this to Me.. I know that I don't deserve to be treated like THIS.. Punish me severely.. for Making YOU feel because I know that I don't deserve You.. YOU are the CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. I am as low as a servant.. How can YOU treat me if I am from the Most lowest Clan.. the Lowest of all.. I am a son of a servant.. I am still a servant even though I am now a palace Guard.. still at the lowest.. I just can't believe it.. either I should be banned or exile.. I should of been striped and placed in prison.. But WHY are you being so Kind to Me.. WHY are you so Kind when I should be demoted and also lived in the Mountains.. in the caves as servant.. and I see YOU walking and I only see your White Dress as YOU are going inside.. celebrating and having a big feast of Banquet.. I am still on the Floor.. How is it possible for me to still be breathing.. and I would hear the three friends.. and They would help me to get UP on the floor.. and I know that I can go alone.. I want my friends to stay and I will go alone.. never to come back.. but.. they would keep on walking with me.. and together we keep on walking.. I am standing by the waters.. I watch the Moon comes UP before me.. My three friends are behind Me.. with four Horses.. I would LOOK up at the Moon.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. Do you know that it has been a Long time since I loved YOU.. Not with a Day passing me By I just couldn't think of YOU.. I know that I do not deserve to Love YOU.. but what happens when I have broken the Golden RULE.. it does Not matter any more what Happens to Me.. because I came so Far.. and I can't never go back now.. YOU do not know How much I love YOU.. it does Not matter if YOU don't love me because I have never asked YOU to love me.. but I have come so Far that NOW I just can't stop loving YOU.. I would look at my sheath.. grabbing the back of the Sword.. I pull the sword Out.. and I raise IT UP.. looking at the shine of the Blade of the sword.. I have never stopped practicing the Art of the Swordsman ship.. I have been training for a Long time.. Been practicing over and over because I knew that One day.. I will have to use this Sword.. to fight and to Protect YOU.. even though YOU may Not need me.. I believe that One day.. I can be put into the service to be useful to Protect YOU.. I would watch the Sun set.. swinging the Sword.. left right right left.. I would be swinging through.. as I watch the Sun comes UP until the SUN goes down into the Night where I see this Same Moon.. I told myself that One day.. I am going to enter the Palace.. One day I am going to come and see YOU.. but of course I do not know How long that One day will be.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. Crown Princess.. I do remember the day I saw YOU.. My Father wanted to surprise me by taking ME to see YOU.. I would be begging HIM.. as I would be holding and Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing of YOU.. He would look at me asking me.. WHY DO I keep on staring at that Art Sketch Paper.. it is NOT going to come Alive.. it is NOT going to ever hear me.. or will Not answer Me.. why do I keep on looking at the Picture of YOU.. what good is going to do if I only stare.. but unable to do anything about It.. and Knowing that I can't be with YOU.. My Father looks at me.. and He tells Me.. why don't I give that Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU to him.. and He will get rid of It.. He tried many times to get rid of the Art Sketch Paper.. tearing it into the pieces.. or even burning with Fire.. I would watch it get burned and torn into pieces.. I would watch it disappear into the Night.. as I could Not do nothing about the situation.. But.. I would always go.. find a Way.. pay coins giving it to the Boy who draws picture.. and He would always give me a New Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU.. My Father sees me with another One.. and Yes.. finally he tells me.. He is going to take me to see YOU.. the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. I do remember as I was on sitting on the Horse.. He would be pulling the Strings of the Horse.. and He would stop.. and He would turn and by the same waters.. He would pull the Horse and stops here where I am standing.. and He would LOOK at me.. looking at the Horse.. He would turn to look at the MOON.. and look at the waters.. and He would turn to look at me who is sitting on the Horse.. and tells me HOW much He misses my MOTHER.. How much My father loved my Mother.. and How he still loves her till this day.. but did Not want to show any signs and tears.. did not want me to look at HIM as a Father being so weak.. but when He sees me.. and How much I love YOU.. as much he would try to get rid of that Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU.. and NO matter what He does to that paper and turns into the ashes.. just looking at my Will and my Love.. how much I love YOU HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. Crown Princess.. it is like He is looking at Himself who misses My Mother.. which My father loved Her so Much.. and He knew.. this is the same way He feels about loving someone.. and wanted to show me something.. as I sat on the Horse as the Little Boy.. He would come to this Place.. looking at the waters.. it brings great peace but sorrow of How much He loves my Mother.. My father would spend a day here.. letting me wonder around.. but He would sit still looking at the waters.. after He gathers his thoughts.. he would help me to get on the Horse and a long journey of HIM walking will take place.. as I am holding the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing picture of YOU.. He smiles looking at me.. for a Long time He would go against me loving YOU.. He would spank me.. hit me.. push me to the floor and I would be crying getting UP.. but my hands are always holding unto the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU until He finally tells me He has given up trying to force me NOT to Love YOU and has opened his heart for me to Love YOU.. He tells me.. I have such a Strong will power.. that I do not give UP that easily.. and that is what He loves about me as His son.. I remember going to the palace.. He shows his Card to the palace guard and they open the Door.. as the Head of the servants.. he would take me to a different location.. a location or the Place I have never been.. and He stops.. there is a Bar Gate.. It was a training Ground and My Father knew that YOU were here.. as I sat on the Horse.. I saw YOU walking.. there were five men standing behind and they were the TOP Generals.. I saw YOU looking across.. holding a Bow.. and grabbing an Arrow.. I saw YOU pulling the strings of the bow Back with the Arrow in between and YOU were aiming.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. CROWN PRINCESS.. I saw YOU let go of the strings of the Bow.. the Arrow releases and it shoots hitting the target.. the MAN who was standing next to the target.. the arrow hits the Red mark.. the Man holds UP the flag and says BULLS EYE.. the Five Men who were with you.. who were standing behind you.. hands were clapping.. knowing that YOU bee practice shooting with the Bow and arrows.. My Father who is standing next to the Horse.. I am sitting On the Top of the Horse.. I wanted this Picture.. I wanted some one.. that Boy who draws sketch paper.. I wanted him here so he can draw me a picture of YOU.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. the Crown Princess.. shooting arrows.. My Father looks.. He turns to look at me.. I am sitting on the top of the Horse.. telling me that a MAN needs to protect who He loves.. and tells me.. looking at YOU.. if I really loved YOU.. I can't be a weak Boy.. can't be weak because YOU are the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. the One who is going to rule over the kingdom.. and to Love YOU means to be a real Man.. to Love YOU means to have the Courage to protect YOU.. and my father looks at me.. instead of Looking at the Art sketch paper.. I needs to pick UP a sword.. pick up the sword and to fight for the One who you love the Most.. and I sat there.. but I just want to love YOU.. but my father tells Me.. Be a real man.. not a coward.. but take heart means to have courage.. knowing how to die you love means YOU can live for YOU.. and I sat there wondering what does that Means.. to fight for.. am I a coward.. am I afraid.. and my Father pulls the Horse away and starts to lead the other way.. holding the strings of the Horse.. He would tell me many things as I would spent my time with HIM.. about Love.. what it means to love YOU.. My father also mentions that

MAH MAH.. Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. who is shooting arrows using the Bow knows that to be the Crown Princess.. needs to protect the People that is with YOU.. also practices daily shooting arrows Hitting the target.. because YOU want to rule the Nation.. to be the next to be on the Line to have the kingdom at hand.. I would turn my Head looking back.. sitting on the top of the Horse.. I would hear the top generals clapping Hands and shouting with Cheers as YOU are hitting the target BULLS EYE.. I am sitting.. and I started to ask my father.. I want to protect the Crown Princess.. because I know that I love YOU.. I want to be the One to protect YOU.. is that means I am showing YOU love.. and My Father smiles.. and tells ME he can train and teach me with the basics and I would turn my head to look front.. and I hear my father laughing as He would pull on the strings of the horse as he is walking and I am sitting on the top of the Horse.. just smiling all the way.. as I am standing here.. Looking at the waters.. I lift UP my head Looking at the Moon.. I have been practicing for a Long time.. ever since my Father showed me YOU.. and told me what a MAN must do.. to protect WHO he loves.. Now.. Many years goes By.. I have never changed this Heart of Mine.. that I always wanted to protect YOU and Never stopped Loving YOU.. I am standing at the cross road.. and I have seen many important people coming forward.. they have kissed YOUR HAND.. showing the devotion to YOU.. But I know that I have Not kissed Your hand yet.. I feel so wrong because I have chosen which I know that I can't.. I told YOU how much I loved YOU.. ever since I saw YOU from my youth.. as a young Boy.. I remember YOU turned to look where I was at.. with my Father next to my side.. I was sitting on the top of Horse.. looking at YOU from the distance.. I saw YOU grabbing an arrow.. holding the strings of Bow.. Putting the back of the arrow on the strings of the Bow.. pulling the strings and aiming the arrow and releasing it.. I saw the arrow flies across and it Hits that Target.. right on the middle of the spot.. I would watch the Man on the side of the Target raising up the flag calling out.. the five generals who were teaching and training YOU.. I over head.. YOU are learning so Fast.. you are very quick on picking UP things.. and they would look at each other smiling.. hands clapping and shouting saying.. the Next Ruler.. Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. the Next one to sit on the Throne.. I was blown into pieces as I sat on the top of the Horse.. watching the arrows hitting the target on the red mark.. I would begin to think.. How can I ever protect the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. YOU have the top Generals on your side.. YOU have the COMMANDERS and the Chief Generals.. they are the Most fierce fighters and warriors who are with YOU.. How can I even fight if YOU have the best men with YOU.. How can I protect YOU.. but My Heart who loves YOU wants to just do that.. to Love YOU and to protect YOU in any means.. as I would stand.. LOOKING at the Blades of the sword.. I can see the shine.. How can I protect YOU.. but that is the Only thing that I can do.. to love YOU and to protect YOU.. as I am looking at the waters.. I did Not know that you came.. I did not know that YOU were going to come.. as I turn around to look at the three friends.. I see YOU behind the four Horses and YOU were sitting on the top of the White Horse.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. and I would lower myself.. and the three Friends also turns around.. the four of us are on the Ground.. looking at the floor.. did YOU hear what I say.. when did YOU come.. did YOU hear everything that I was sharing.. and all I hear is silent.. I am looking at the ground.. I hear Your Voice.. telling me to get UP.. that I must come back to the Palace.. that YOU have something for me to DO.. but.. I just remained still.. I just couldn't get UP.. because YOU are the Crown Princess.. just give me the permission.. allow me to get UP.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. I am still standing by the waters.. Just thinking about YOU.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I wish that I could be with YOU.. I have dreamed ever since I was a young Boy.. even though I knew that It was never to be happened.. I know that I can't be with YOU because YOU are so Big.. but what can I do as a MAN who can Only dream and believe that Maybe if there was a Chance.. How can I be with YOU.. to Love YOU.. all I ever wanted ever since I laid my eyes on YOU.. when I saw YOU.. even though I know I can't.. but I still do believe that I can.. all I am asking is for YOU to know my Heart.. to know How much I love YOU.. I want to be with YOU and spend the rest of my life by your side just to love YOU.. to tell you how much I love YOU and love you until I die.. do YOU know that I never will stop.. as I am looking at the waters.. and I turn to look back.. I see you on the Horse.. YOU are sitting on the top of the Horse.. I see you wearing the White dress.. so Lovely.. how come you only wear that White Dress.. why are you showing me that YOU are so Beautiful.. if YOU keep on showing me how Beautiful YOU are.. what am I suppose to do.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. and as I am on the ground.. with the three of my friends.. Looking at the ground.. I can't come with YOU right Now.. I know I can't go.. I just need some time to be alone.. and before YOU came.. One of my friends told me.. He saw Six Princes and they were standing next to the King and Queen.. PEH HA and HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I am wondering who those six Men were.. I know they were from the Royal Blood Line.. as I heard your voice.. I would listen to your Voice and with the three friends we all get Up.. as I wanted to come closer to YOU.. I see the Big Crown on top of your Head.. I see seven Men behind YOU.. the Chief Generals and Commanders.. DAE JANG GEUN.. they all showed UP and standing behind YOU.. and I just can't believe this happened so fast.. I knew that this day would show UP but so Fast was unexpected.. and I would lower myself.. on two knees and I would ask.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I am asking for the permission to speak.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. can you please give me the permission to speak.. and I hear YOUR voice.. I am wondering about the Six Men.. they were Princes.. who were standing next to the Queen.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. may I ask who are those Six Men.. and I would hear the Head of the Servant who shows UP.. He looks at me and pulls Out the sword.. I see YOU lifting UP your hand to back down and he goes back.. and I hear you tell me.. and Me and the three friends are all shocked.. and I am wondering.. How can this Be.. they are the Older Brothers of CROWN PRINCESS.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. and I am wondering.. How can this Be.. if the Crown Princess has six Older Brothers ahead.. and YOU have succeeded to next in Line to get the Throne.. and I feel like a Storm is going to come in the Palace.. and I look at YOU.. and I see YOU put your hand Out.. and I am thinking in my mind.. YOU have great army with YOU.. look at the Chief Generals and also the COMMANDERS who got Your Back and has your Support.. even the King and the Queen.. PEH HA and HWANG WOO MAH MAH are the ones who gave you the Crown.. I saw them both kneeling and kissing Your Hand.. of course I did Not see any of the Six Princes kissing Your Hand but now I know why.. But why do YOU need Me.. YOU have even the Prime Minister.. TAE SAH JAH.. and even the COUNCIL OF NOBLE MEN.. all the Maids.. even the HIGHEST KITCHEN LADY.. and even the Chief Doctor too.. WHY do you need me to help Me.. YOU know that I am so small.. I am Nothing when You look at all these great and important people around YOU.. and I see YOU getting Off the Horse.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. Please.. Stand back.. YOU don't need to come closer to Me.. YOU know How Great and Important you are and has become for the Kingdom you represent.. and I have become so Low.. Now it is so hard for me to get close to YOU.. when I see these great Men.. warrior Men surrounding YOU.. and with me the three friends would step back.. but I see YOU coming.. looking so Beautiful.. with the big Crown wearing the white Dress.. WHAT am I suppose to Do if I feel like YOU are this Great.. if you are this Big in my eyes.. what am I suppose to do.. and I am looking at the floor.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. Crown Princess.. and I would hear Your Voice.. and I would stop.. I would listen to Your Voice as I lift UP my Head to look at YOU.. as I would show my tears in my eyes.. How am I suppose to Love YOU.. if YOU are this Great and this Big.. and I feel so small when I am around YOU.. I just feel like I can't do anything any more.. because I have Nothing.. and I see YOU standing there.. YOU are wondering what happened to the boldness.. the courage.. the confidence that YOU saw in Me.. It is still here inside my Heart.. but.. at this Point right Now.. YOU have just gotten bigger.. and More stronger.. YOU have gotten.. that is why I am asking YOU for some time.. that I needed some time and space to think it through.. and No.. YOU are not going to ever lose me because I have never stopped loving YOU.. the process of.. and needing the time and space to help me to bounce back is what I am asking for HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. that is why I came here to the waters.. to bring the peace of Mind and to think it through.. and as I am looking at YOU.. I see you standing still.. Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. Please know that I am going to go back to the palace.. as I am looking at YOU turning around.. I feel the deep sadness.. because I love YOU so much.. I feel so helpless at this Point.. watching YOU getting and

MAH MAH.. Maids would help you to get YOU sit on top of the Horse.. I don't want YOU to go deep inside.. but I know that YOU must Go.. YOU are the one who to rule Next.. YOU have all of the great important people backing YOU up and supporting YOU.. they are going to help YOU to defend but also I will come very soon.. soon to be by your side.. I feel bad that I can't kiss Your Hand either.. looking at the six Princes.. I saw None of them smiling at ALL.. they were there but.. NONE of the SIX PRINCES went over to Kiss Your Hand.. and I feel like maybe is this the way YOU are seeing me like Your Older Brothers.. because FOR ME.. I want YOU TO truly SUCCEED.. I want YOU to truly rule.. I want YOU to be seated in the right Place where it is your Seat.. but thinking of Your Older Brothers.. this is the reason why I know I must go back.. I know that I must be by your side.. I feel like something is going to happen in that HOUSE.. in the Palace and I want to help YOU.. and I will help YOU.. and I see YOU sitting on the Horse and has turned around.. I would watch the Special Body Guards on the sides.. left and right.. I see the Commanders leading the way.. and the Chief Generals in the Back.. and my Heart.. WHY is this Happening and I do remember my Father would say.. I must be a swordsmanship to Protect the Princess.. to Protect the Crown Princess.. if I truly Love YOU.. I must know and learn to Protect.. and I would Pull Out my sword.. as I stood up.. watching YOU.. I see the Horse keep on walking forward.. my three friends behind me pulls Out their swords.. and I know that I must go back.. Back to the Palace.. just to protect YOU.. even if I must fight and even I die by the Brothers.. I know that the Crown Princess Must had the seat.. because that is the Only one thing is on My Mind and Heart.. to see YOU succeeded to the Throne.. I would turn around and I am looking at the waters.. I would close both eyes.. My Father is looking at me.. holding a training stick.. wood shape as the sword.. and it hits my Head.. I am crying as it hits my head again.. I would hear his voice.. telling me to stop crying.. even though it hurts.. that a man should NOT cry.. the WOOD training stick shape of sword hits me head again.. I am holding my tears.. the angry as the pain hits my head.. I would look up at the Father.. telling me.. holding the pain inside.. and the more it hits me.. I have to hold all the pain that is killing me.. Until I just can't hold it no more.. and that is HOW I feel.. when I see YOU.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. CROWN PRINCESS.. it feels like it.. this sharp Pain that stabs my Heart.. when I saw YOU getting back on the Horse.. I know that I should of told you I will go with YOU.. but letting YOU go.. and I am not going with YOU hurts me more deeply inside.. watching you sit.. Horse turning away on the Other side.. and it was a pretty Long journey that YOU came.. it really hurt me Hard.. YOU are the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. and I have turned YOU down because I needed space.. but thinking about the situation.. and at the crucial time.. I should of kept my mouth shut.. I should of thought about the situation first before saying something.. I did not meant to reject.. but wanted to let YOU Know I am coming.. I am going back to that palace to join YOU.. but just to give me a little time.. I should of been thoughtful.. I am so sorry Crown Princess.. I am so Sorry WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. I am so Sorry.. I know that YOU are going through a lot.. especially what is happening in that House.. as I am looking at the waters.. My Heart feels more heavy.. what if I never asked.. If I did not ask about the Six Princes because that was None of my business.. but Now I know what is going On.. and it really really sucks to know because I would of thought that everyone would celebrate this.. I was so happy to know when I found Out that the King had made YOU into the Crown Princess.. MY Heart was laughing while I was laughing so loudly when I heard.. I turn and I looked over.. I saw the King.. He comes over.. with the big CROWN putting on top of your Head.. Your Father was so proud and in tears with JOY as He was the One to put on top of your Head.. and He kisses Your Hand and says.. well Done.. Now to keep it.. I saw the Queen.. and I saw Six Men.. on the royal robe coming down.. and they would just stand by the Queen.. I do remember just looking.. never seen any of the six Men before.. but they were wearing the royal Robe and knew that they were a part of the Royal Blood family line.. and they just stood next to the Queen.. did Not say a word.. looked more angry.. But I did not know who they were at all.. Never seen any of them before.. When YOU told me who they were.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I was shocked to know.. because I did not even thought of being in your own family.. I thought maybe like the Uncle's sons.. One of them was wobbling around.. like had too much wine to drink.. and would fall on the ground.. But Now I know why YOU came.. Now I see what has you troubled in your Heart.. I know that I have a true Mission to protect YOU.. to be with YOU and Help you to be in that throne.. that is the Only way for YOU to secure and establish YOU as the Queen of the Throne for this Nation.. It is that I will fight For YOU.. for your behalf because YOU Know How much I love YOU.. as I am looking at the waters.. my three friends would shout with Me.. To Protect the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. To protect the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. and with One voice the four of us shouted.. We will protect the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. we.. I will protect YOU.. and when I turned around.. I see YOU there.. I see you sitting on that Horse.. and I would lift UP to see YOU SMILE.. I have made this VOW.. to stay by your side.. to Love YOU and to always protect YOU.. I would bow my knee.. put my arm front and head down to show.. I too be with YOU forever.. the three friends behind.. we all did it together to be with YOU.. I am sitting on the Horse.. as the Horse runs.. I am going back to the Palace.. I am thinking of YOU.. I have never stopped Loving YOU.. I would be pulling the strings of the Horse.. and I see the Horse running very Fast.. Behind me is seven Men.. four are new friends who has joined.. and they are all riding on the Horses.. as I am on the front.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I thank YOU.. I would be shouting.. as I am going to the Palace.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. I would scream from my lungs.. Do you know that I still Love YOU.. I am coming.. I am going to YOU.. as I see the Moon behind Me.. I am hitting the Strings hard.. the Horse runs faster and faster.. and as the New Day comes and the Sun rises.. I am at the second training ground.. I am standing next to the Horse.. It was my Father's horse.. it was once Young but has gotten older now.. as I am standing next to the Horse.. I watch YOU.. My Heart.. it is My Heart.. I watch YOU walking in the center of the training ground.. the Seven Men.. my friends are all behind me.. they are all sitting on the Horses.. I am crying.. as I am watching YOU.. the fences.. the wood bat fences.. and I am looking at YOU.. as YOU are holding a stick.. I see you about to spar and the Chief General.. the TOP of the generals.. he steps out with a Stick.. and He is the One who taught YOU how to fight to be a swordsmanship.. I never knew that YOU wanted to be a swordsman.. as I see the sticks hitting together.. My Heart would jump.. I see you swinging the Stick.. and the Chief General ducks.. and He would swing the Stick.. which.. I wanted to go Inside to Protect.. to fight Back.. but the Fence stops me.. I know that I can't go in.. I see two guards guarding it.. and they would NOT let me in.. but I see the Stick swings and Hits YOU.. I grab my Sword.. and one of the Friends would shout.. which.. it makes YOU stop.. and YOU look back.. and I pull out the Sword.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. Are you Hurt.. can I go in.. YOU know that I came here.. I came here to ready to Fight On your Behalf.. Please.. tell the guards to OPEN the fence Door.. so I can fight that General.. and the Men.. seven Men all gets Out of their Horses.. and they all Pull out their swords.. and We all Kneel.. both on the Knees.. and arms Out.. Heads looks on the Floor.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. and with One Voice.. we Shout.. CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. Please.. and all Eight of Us.. heads looking on the floor.. which it stops YOU from practicing on that training Ground.. and I see you.. ON the White Dress.. I see you coming.. and I see you walking forward.. and I see you close to the Fence.. and I hear YOUR VOICE.. as I lift UP the Head and too look at YOU.. I have promised YOU.. that I am never going to Let YOU go.. even though I may not be with YOU.. there must be a way something can Happen.. but for right Now.. I have promised YOU that I am not going to let YOU down.. YOU also even send four new Men to join my team.. without YOU how can we be added like this.. I know that I may be so Small in your eyes.. I may not have much to give YOU.. but I know that I can do one thing.. to Protect YOU.. if YOU allow me to protect YOU.. I can do a little service.. and with these men.. I know that we can help.. I came here without eating.. we practiced and trained all through the Night.. I was thinking of the Promise.. I know that I can't do much.. but My Heart.. tells me if I love YOU.. there is something that I can do.. and It hit me Hard.. and I just started to think of YOU.. I know that YOU have many soldiers.. you have great generals to Chief generals.. also Commanders are with YOU.. but YOU have gave me four New Men and added.. why would you do something like that for Me.. and I told the seven Men.. Let us ALL

I am looking at the Tape recorder and I would Press the Play Button.. I can hear the Music of the Piano playing in the Back ground and I am listening to my Voice which I recorded on this Tape Recorder from few days Back when I got drunk taking some few Shots of Hard Liquor.. I remember I made a Promise to myself that I was Not going to drink and record my Voice on the Tape Recorder.. as I am sitting down on the Bed.. I would Listen to my Own Voice.. and I would turn to look at the Corner of the ROOM.. I am Looking at the Little Piano who sits there.. and I would start to Cry.. only if I listened.. if I could only turn the times and GO back on the early days.. Only if I listened to the Voice of my Dear Mother.. I know that by Now.. I would of walk over to the corner of the ROOM.. and the first thing I would do is NOT listen to my own voice on the Tape Recorder.. I would gone to a place where I can learn HOW to Sing for YOU.. a Coach who can teach me How to use my voice to sing so that my Voice would NOT just be words to tell you through sentences but a VOICE.. I may Not have a GOOD voice to sing like the TOP Singers of the World.. but enough where you can sit there and Listen to me SING a Song for YOU.. a LOVE Song that can ONLY be written from my Heart to Your Heart.. to tell you a LOVE story more than what a Writing can Bring but also can go reach Further to show YOU and to say to YOU that MY HEART.. I can sing out from my Heart so that WHEN YOUR HEART can OPEN.. your ears can learn to open to Hear me to sing from the BOTTOM of my Heart.. I be in tears because I be moved.. I be touched and Inspired because I would tell YOU in many different ways HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU.. only if I have learned HOW to Play the Little Piano who sits in my ROOM.. it is waiting for Me to Play.. to touch the Key Bars and Press so that SOUNDS brings Out a New Music and where YOU can hear some one like me to play something for YOU.. but Sitting on the TOP of the Bed.. and I am only playing the Tape Recorder.. I am listening to my Own voice of few days I got drunk and I would recorder on the Tape Recorder of my Voice.. I am telling you that I miss YOU.. I been longing to see YOU.. and asking when it be the Time that I can see YOU.. will it ever come True.. will it ever Be or do I wait until I go to Heaven.. do I must wait until I die and when I wake UP it is in the Kingdom of Heaven and I must wait for YOU there.. the after life.. but what If I do not want to wait for that LONG.. how about much sooner.. will that day come or do I must bring another way Out.. that is why sitting on the Top of the Bed.. with the Tape Recorder in my Hand.. I would press the Play Button to listen and I am sharing from my Heart.. but it is kind of Hard to hear what I am trying to say because I do remember.. it is late into the Night.. I just could Not sleep and I would turn to LOOK Over.. looking at the Little Piano sitting on the corner of the ROOM.. I just want to Play.. my Heart be beating Hard that I want to go over to the Little Piano.. if it can talk back to Me.. I would say to It.. I want to play something because I want to play something for YOU.. so I would walk over to the Table desk.. LOOKING at the Picture of YOU.. I am screaming.. I am screaming not because I am dreaming.. I am screaming inside because I want to tell YOU MORE but I just can't.. I needs to let it Out and let you know that there is a lot more I can say to YOU then just this.. I want to write you a story.. a LOVE story that can COME out of playing from the Little Piano.. I just can't though and Now I am dying of something I just can't do or Have.. Next thing I remember is that I put a SHOT GLASS and a BOTTLE of Hard Whiskey on the table.. this Heated Moment that I want to be with YOU.. How to get to YOU.. How am I suppose to get to YOU.. get Your Mind to think of me More and More.. to Love me so that I can tell YOU that I love you.. grabbing the Bottle of Hard whiskey I pour into the Shot Glass.. I remember taking a SHOT from the Shot Glass.. few More times I remember taking from the Shot Glass.. and I would fall to the ground and I crash down hard.. slowly getting UP.. In so much Pain.. I fell it all over my Body because I just can't handle this KIND OF PAIN.. I get up slowly.. LOOKING at your Picture.. I just can't take it any more.. HELP ME because it is hurting me so Much.. and I would get UP and walk slowly to the Corner of the ROOM.. LOOKING at the LITTLE PIANO.. and I am asking WHY.. I want to play something.. I want to play so that a SONG and a MUSIC can come out of YOU.. I have written YOU a Letter.. I have a Letter in my hand that I have written.. next to the Little Piano on top is the tape recorder.. only If I learned when I was younger.. I know that I would of gone to the singing classes.. and even how to write Music to be a COMPOSER.. so that over the Years I be able to have enough experiences to write YOU a MUSIC and a SONG.. if I learned HOW to sing.. would I be in this MUCH OF PAIN.. I would NOT of suffered Much because I would also of written YOU SONGS and More Music.. write you Lyrics and through putting it all together.. even though I may Not be a SINGER.. I know that at least just for YOU.. Just to express my Heart of How much I love YOU.. YOU can see the Bigger Heart of much expanding the Reach of your Heart to YOU.. I would of send you Tapes so that YOU can listen to say.. At least you know that it came from someone on the Other side who Loves you this Much that It grows bigger than where I am at right Now.. and I can show you MY Heart.. How much I can Love you More through this WAY as well.. but ALL I do is see the Little Piano at the corner of the ROOM and it just sits there alone.. I am sitting on the Bed.. and ALL I can do is hear my own Voice when I recorded it few days ago when I was drunk.. I do remember I was on the floor.. and I just wanted to lay down still.. It was very Hard for me to get UP because I be missing YOU.. when YOU LOOK at the Little Piano and How I have missed Out the Once in a Life time chance.. it Hurts me a lot more because I would regret.. My Mother told me Once that when the time passes by and that I did NOT hear her words and did Not act upon her words when she asked me.. she begged me to Learn.. that I had to learn an Art.. to be more expressive means to know there is an ART for me to explore when I was younger.. I sit on the Bed.. crying because of those words.. and it is True.. I feel like I could of done something then when I did had the chance to Learn.. but I never thought that I would find a LOVE in YOU.. if I knew that I would of loved you this Much.. and this would come to me.. I believe that then I would of taken that chance.. but ALL I do now is sit on the top of the Bed.. with the Tape Recorder and I would record my voice.. and i would reply to hear my own VOICE but if I give you this Tape.. it is Not going to do Much to YOU and that is what Hurts me the Most.. it could of been Better if I did Learn everything that I should of then.. because if I did take that Chance.. it would Not only been the Letters I write YOU and the stories that I share on the Love.. but also I would of Played the Piano for YOU.. and when I play the Piano.. you could hear the Voice.. Years of singing songs and practices so that ONE DAY you can hear me More than just written Letters.. I would of given you a TAPE AND recorded everything.. hearing my VOICE to sing to YOU.. telling YOU that I love YOU.. telling YOU that I miss YOU.. it be YOU sitting on the TOP of the Bed with the Tape Recorder hearing my Voice singing out to YOU while playing the Little Piano telling YOU HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU.. YOU would of called me Smart man.. because YOU would of seen many ways to get to YOU by One Heart which it means HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU.. it is so Hard to say I love you.. it has always been this Hard because I know that YOU MUST believe these Words of MINE of HOW MUCH.. even though YOU may have a vague picture of me right Now.. that is why Only if I listened to the VOICE of My Mother.. when I was Younger when she told Me.. the Vague could of grown Bigger a lot sooner.. because right Now.. it will take For ever for the Love to ever reach YOU.. I been dying to tell YOU that I love YOU.. but I know that right Now you may not believe my Words Yet.. it was my mistake and It is my Fault that I never listened to my Mother.. her voice when SHE spoke.. Now I am sitting on the TOP of my Bed.. pressing the Play Button of the Tape Recorder and only hearing my Voice speaking of YOU.. telling myself how much I love YOU and regretting because I never listened to my Mother's Voice.. I wished that I did Listen.. I am only wishing Now that I did because ALL I see in the room in the corner sits the Little Piano that I wish I knew how to Play.. I remember few days ago when I was drunk and after falling on the ground.. and I would slowly get UP and I turn to LOOK at the Little Piano.. I would walk over and touch the Little Piano.. the Tears would run down and I would say to the Little Piano.. I wish that I would of Learned How to Play so that we can make Music together and I can learn How to sing so that the Joy in the Heart might be complete because NOW I can tell you in another Form.. in another way HOW to tell YOU or say to YOU.. that YOU can NOW listen to my VOICE when I be singing and Playing the Little Piano looking at your Picture.. that I love YOU.. I love you and I miss YOU.. and I can LOOK UP at the sky.. I can take the LITTLE PIANO anywhere I go with me.. and together I can play and sing and let YOU THINK of me as I am LOOKING at the MOON on the Other side saying.. CAN YOU HEAR ME playing.. CAN YOU HEAR ME SINGING OUT my Heart to tell YOU that I love YOU MORE AND MORE.. YOU know that I have Now mastered My own Art of

YOU LETTERS AND LETTING You hear Love stories of My Heart.. only if I could Play the Little Piano and SING SONGS for YOU.. YOU know How much great I love YOU.. it be a BIG LOVE that I have for YOU that NO MAN can share to YOU because ALL I ever wanted to share and tell YOU is that I DO really Love YOU this Much.. I am looking at the Piano.. as I would walk into the room.. I look at your Picture.. wishing that YOU can see what I just got.. even though YOU may be far from Me.. at least send me Your Heart.. if I can have your Heart.. I will keep Your Heart safe here with Me.. looking at the Empty Glass jar.. I would Place the Empty Glass Jar on the TOP of the Piano.. and I wish that I can Place your Heart inside this Empty Glass Jar.. even though YOU are far.. Knowing and Looking at your Heart.. I know that YOUR HEART is close with me.. I pull up the Piano Chair closer to the Piano.. and I would sit on the chair.. only if I can get You here.. will YOU ever come closer to Me.. How do I get you closer to Me.. and I would look at the key bars of the Piano.. But.. I can't play the tune.. I can't even sing with my voice.. just sitting here.. it seems like it be better if I was Not here at the first Place.. But.. I can write YOU a Letter.. I know that I can tell YOU how much I miss YOU.. I can tell YOU with the Words.. with the Lips.. with my voice.. What I truly feel deep inside my Heart.. I put all my time when I grab the Pencil.. when I grab the paper.. and I grab the piece of paper.. I know that for sure I can write and tell you.. How I feel.. How it feels to be me here on the Other side.. as long as the Letter is able to get to YOU.. will you please receive the Letters.. will you please unfold the piece of Paper which be folded when I give it to YOU.. will you please open your Heart.. hear the words of Mine that comes from my Heart.. how much I love YOU.. How much I adore YOU and admire YOU and How much I miss YOU too.. you are wondering.. what is it about the Piano.. why am I bringing UP the word Piano to YOU if I can't sing.. or can't play tunes of the keys of the piano to bring Music alive.. why am I telling YOU or sharing you about the Piano.. because I want YOU to know.. I want to Place Your Heart.. I want to place your Heart on this Empty Glass Jar.. which is on top of the Piano.. so that when I look at Your Heart.. I can learn How to play the Piano.. it make take some time for me to Know How to Play.. but when I look at your Heart.. when I look at your Heart inside the empty glass jar.. I would look at your Heart.. it may inspire me to say I love you in a way YOU never felt before.. I would think of many different ways to tell YOU.. that I love YOU and that I want to say to Your Heart first.. I would like to tell Your Heart first so that YOU can truly trust me with Your Precious Heart.. without any trust.. there is NO way I can love YOU where YOU are able to love me back One day.. that is why I need Your Heart first with Me.. I remember when I was Young.. my Mother wanted me to Learn something new.. and bought a Piano for Me.. I wanted to learn something New.. wanted to tell a story through but when my Mother bought the Piano.. it was just too complicated for me to learn.. I would watch the Teacher come.. and she would play on the Piano.. I wish that I learned at that time because Now.. when I look at you.. I would LOOK at your Picture.. and I would say WOW.. I would say YOU are so Beautiful.. I would stand by the Piano and say.. YOU are as beautiful like the Piano because Now.. I want to play and make a Music for YOU.. I want to tell YOU that I love YOU.. I want to tell YOU MORE.. I want to step Out of the comfort zone and tell YOU what YOU means to me.. when ever I look at you.. through the Picture.. I would regret when I look at the Piano sitting in the Room.. because.. Now I want to play and make music so that I can tell YOU.. even though I may Not be able to sing YOU a SONG.. I would bring a recorder.. and would record my voice.. as my fingers would press on the key bars of the Piano.. I can at least speak to the recorder.. but before I would play on the Piano making Music to come alive.. I would be sitting in my bed room.. taking Out the Piece of paper.. I would write YOU a Letter first.. telling YOU my Heart.. speaking from my Heart.. and writing that comes from My Heart to let YOU know.. the Letter is Not the Only way I can tell YOU my Heart.. I would sit on the Piano Chair.. regretting because I did Not learn at that time.. I had the chance to learn when I was young.. but I only watched the teacher play.. looking at her back as she played and making Music.. pressing the Key bars.. to the sound of my ears it tingled because she Played so well.. if I only learned from that teacher.. only if I took the time to be more serious about learning the keys.. composing and writing the music Notes.. the keys.. I wonder what could of happened Now.. if I learned at that time.. which My Mother would say.. It be wise to learn this kind of instrument because when it is gone.. YOU will regret it when TIME passes by.. I would stand by the Piano.. I would sit on the Piano Chair.. looking at the key bars.. pressing the key bars.. only sounds but weird sounds will hit.. and I feel so terrible Not because I wish that I learned.. so that I can play for YOU.. so that I can tell YOU.. there is Much more ways to Tell YOU how much I love YOU.. I would even take the Piano out side.. even looking at the MOON in the Night.. when I miss YOU.. when I know that YOU are so Far away and I keep on missing YOU.. at least.. with tears in my eyes of Not able to hold YOU.. unable to be close to YOU and It hurts some nights.. I can play the Piano in the Night.. telling YOU.. looking UP at the MOON.. as my fingers hits the Key bars bringing music.. I would be pulling Out the Letter that is written for YOU and tell YOU a story of How much I love YOU.. if the neighbors would come out telling me about the Noises.. I would turn to that person and say.. DID YOU ever miss someone.. when it hurts.. it just hurts so much when YOU start missing.. I needs to say.. I needs to tell YOU this Heart of Mine.. there are times that it feels so painful.. it hurts.. I see tear drops out of my eyes.. so to take this anger out of My Heart for Missing YOU.. I needs to play YOU a SONG.. this Piano is my friend.. helps me to express what I feel when I am dealing with so Much sorrow in me.. that I love YOU but I miss YOU more.. why.. why do you keep on making me feel this way.. when YOU are so far off.. what am I suppose to do when I miss YOU.. and only thing that I can do is taking out the Picture.. the only thing I can do is pull the Picture out of my pocket.. and LOOK at YOU.. do YOU know How it feels when YOU just can't do nothing.. but only thing I can do is look at you in this Picture.. but I needs to tell YOU that I needs to be with YOU.. I needs to get this Off my Chest.. Off my Heart that I needs to be with YOU.. and it hurts me so much because I am dying right Now without YOU in my life.. and to keep my Anger and this pain.. this suffering away.. if I look at the Piano.. and I am able to pull the Piano chair closer.. and able to play the tunes of the Piano pressing on the key bars.. I know that I can tell YOU what I have written.. pressing the recorder.. as I am in the ROOM.. I would open up my Heart and say.. I miss YOU.. I am not sure why I am missing YOU so much right Now.. and I be asking.. do YOU ever feel the same as I do.. I don't want to hear the answer that is going to KILL me up inside but to ask YOU.. DO YOU miss me the way I do.. I have brought the Piano Out side.. the neighbors are telling me to be quiet and they needs to sleep.. but when I am sitting Out side.. with the Piano and the Chair.. I am able to look UP at the MOON and let the Moon hear my Voice.. asking the MOON.. do YOU hear me tonight.. even though I have the Recorder recording my Voice what I AM saying as the Letter is in front so that I can read it out Loud.. with tears of sorrow.. with My Heart be hurting.. I am missing YOU.. I am missing YOU so much right Now that I need YOU here.. can YOU Hear me.. I am out side.. can YOU hear the Piano Playing.. it is Me who is playing this Piano so that YOU can hear Me.. so that YOU know what I am doing right Now.. I want YOU to hear me.. that is why I have decided to buy another Piano.. a smaller where I can take it out side so that YOU can hear the key bars.. when you hear the sound of the Music coming out of the Piano.. YOU know that It is me.. which I am telling YOU.. I am hurting right Now.. I miss YOU right Now.. where are YOU so that I can tell YOU my Heart.. Please come Out.. come Out and hear this Piano playing.. making the Music to come alive.. only if YOU knew this Heart of Mine.. every time I am sad.. every time I feel this Pain.. every time I want to cry.. when I be missing YOU.. I will be playing the Piano out side.. where if YOU are able to see the MOON on the Other side.. YOU can hear me.. that I am crying right Now.. I am missing YOU right Now.. so you know that it is me on the Other side looking for YOU.. I am missing YOU.. I am missing YOU because YOU are so far away.. where are YOU.. Please tell me so that I know that How you be doing.. tell me so that I can go to YOU like the wind.. as I am standing.. I am looking at the Piano in the room.. I have the letter in my hand and On the Other hand I have your Picture.. thinking of YOU.. and just loving YOU even though I am not sure if I would ever meet YOU.. will I ever see YOU.. can YOU Please tell me that I can see YOU soon.. or do YOU want me to pull the Piano.. the smaller Piano and walk out side.. do YOU want to hear me playing.. when I play on this Piano.. just please remember I am wailing and I am crying on the Other side because I need YOU.. I need YOU and I love YOU.. but for most I am missing YOU.. I am in the Room.. Looking out the

I see the rain showering down.. I would like to walk in the rain.. but it be nice If I take this Piano with Me.. I have written YOU another Letter.. I wonder if YOU can Hear Me Now.. I know that just standing Out alone.. and Turning to LOOK up.. LOOKING at the Moon and just speaking to the MOON.. that Moon does Not Hear Me.. so I am trying something New.. something different so that Maybe the MOON can catch the glimpse of Me.. and Can turn to LOOK at Me.. and Hear me.. I am trying to grab and get the attention of that MOON.. so maybe I can bring Out this Little Piano that I bought.. and PUT it outside.. and I can Hit the Keys.. making the Sounds.. and with the Recorder in my hand.. and Push the Recording Button as I can open this Letter.. which I have written just for YOU and share it.. If YOU can Hear Me.. Can the Moon hear me Now.. if I can get the MOON to get closer to Me.. I can ask the MOON.. and show the MOON the Picture of YOU.. and ask the MOON.. if YOU see this Person.. in the Picture.. can YOU do something for Me.. will you send me an Angel.. call an Angel for Me.. and I will show the Angel the Picture of YOU.. and I would open the Recorder.. and give the Angel the Tape I have recorded and If the Angel can do me a favor.. that I have One Wish.. to give this Tape to YOU.. and YOU can hear my Voice.. YOU can hear me say and tell YOU what is deep in my Heart.. as I would speak to the recorder to tell YOU.. HOW much I miss YOU.. How Much I want to be close to YOU.. I know that if I just appear out of the Blue.. I don't want to scare YOU.. I don't want YOU to think that I am stalking YOU because I am Not.. so Maybe the MOON.. which hears me Press the Key notes and making the Sounds of pressing the Key bars can turn to Hear and Notice me that I am here down Below.. and If the MOON comes closer.. I will ask.. DO you know any angels who can do me favor.. because I have One wish.. Not asking Much but just for ONE wish.. so I will tell the MOON.. Please get me an Angel to come at my aid.. and If I see the Angel.. I will give HIM the picture of YOU and the tape which I have recorded over and also if YOU need the Letter.. I will give this Angel the Letter too.. just in case YOU want to read this Letter of Mine.. as I am looking out the window.. looking at the rain pouring down.. I have the Piano.. the Little Piano with Me.. I want to take it Out.. I want to go out side and play the Piano.. of course I don't know how to Play.. so If you hear the back ground and It does Not sound right.. YOU know that it is Me.. it is Me who is pressing the Key bars.. just pressing because I want YOU to hear me.. Please hear Me.. Please hear me what I needs to say and to tell YOU.. that I love YOU.. why do I love you this way.. I love you in a way YOU can say.. I am creative with what I do.. I am looking at the Little Piano.. Looking at Your Picture.. and I would say to my self.. I miss YOU.. I really really Miss YOU.. just watching the rain fall and the shower of the rain coming down from the sky.. It makes me more miss YOU.. I wish that I did not have to Miss YOU.. but for some reason.. this very Night I really miss YOU.. the way my Heart truly feels is this.. grabbing an Empty Glass Jar.. I want to pull out My Heart from my chest.. grab a Knife and stab my Heart right in the Middle and put the wounded Heart.. the One with the scars.. Put it inside the Glass jar.. watching my Heart be bleeding.. I feel like I am slowly dying instead.. as I look at the Blood gushing Out of my Heart and I see my own blood filling UP the Glass Jar with my Heart still inside it.. I be looking at it.. and I would take the Little Piano Out side.. does Not matter How wet I get.. But I feel like I am dying inside for YOU.. because I miss YOU.. as I am out side.. standing in the rain.. getting wet by the Rain.. I would also bring the Glass Jar.. with My Heart and the Blood filled.. and let YOU see It.. I would ask the Moon.. do YOU not feel sorry for Me.. Do you not see How much I am in pain and that I am suffering so much right Now.. and I would push the recording Button of the recorder.. pressing with my fingers of the key Bars.. telling YOU what I wrote.. I would memorize the Letter I wrote to YOU.. in the Rain.. I am calling Out for YOU.. crying Out for YOU.. can YOU see my Heart.. DO you want to see My Heart.. if YOU can't see it.. I have brought the Glass Jar.. with my Heart inside.. I am missing YOU so much right Now.. I just don't know what to do.. what am I suppose to do when I miss You like this.. Please tell Me.. I have the tape with me.. with My Voice and words speaking into the recorder.. I am reading the Letter which I wrote.. I am reading as I am looking at the Heart.. LOOKING at my Heart inside the Glass Jar covered in Blood.. Please Help me to recover from this Wound and from the scars I feel in my Heart when I be missing YOU.. I just can't take this pain any more.. Please help me to Love again.. If I don't see YOU.. this is how My Heart feels right Now.. as I would look UP.. looking at the MOON.. I be pressing the key Bars of the Little Piano.. and I am crying.. crying because I want More than just this.. I want More of YOU.. I want to say it to your ears.. and tell YOU as I hold you near.. hold you near in my arms.. telling YOU.. why can't I tell YOU.. why can't I say it to YOU in person.. give me the chance to speak to YOU so that YOU can hear me clearly what is IN my Heart.. help me to love YOU more.. only way to can help me.. only way I can get to YOU.. Please Open Your Heart to me.. show me that YOU care.. show me that YOU are truly listening.. because many nights I am Not sure if YOU are or Not.. as My fingers are hitting.. banging on the Key Bars making sounds on this Little Piano.. I want to hear from YOU.. I needs to hear from YOU.. that YOU are listening on the Other side.. I only see the MOON.. but I can't see YOU.. I want to see YOU.. I want to see YOU near.. and as I would press the stop button of the tape recorder.. I stand still.. getting more wet by the rain.. showers of water of rain on me.. My arm stretches Out.. my hand opens out.. towards the MOON.. How can I get to YOU.. How can I get Your attention.. How do I get YOU to notice Me.. I know that I am very small as a person.. but the way I love YOU.. the size of How much I love YOU.. If YOU can come Outside at Night.. My Heart of loving YOU can be as big as the MOON I am looking at.. if YOU look at the MOON.. the same Moon I am looking at.. that is HOW MUCH I love YOU.. that is How much I want to tell YOU that I love YOU.. even though my Heart breaks.. I can feel my Heart be breaking on the Night like this because I love YOU.. and because I miss YOU.. why don't you ever see Me.. why don't you ever notice Me.. YOU know that I been hear all this Long.. I been here all this Time telling YOU that it is real.. it is true that I be loving YOU.. YOU needs to see that and believe it too. Please give me a chance to Love YOU.. Please give me One Chance.. One shot is all I am asking for.. Not even a day but even few minutes of the time is all I am asking for.. But I am asking YOU.. that Only YOU can make me smile.. as I see the Rain stopped.. and I am standing alone out side.. I am soaked wet because of the shower of rains would pour down on me.. I would pull out the Letter.. of course the Letter is soaked wet too.. but I can still see the writings.. and I would look at the wet recorder and press the Button of the recording.. and the little Piano has a stand.. so I would place the Glass jar on top of the Little Piano.. and after Opening the Letter.. I would lift UP my head towards and I would look at the MOON.. DO you hear Me.. can YOU Please hear me.. ON this very Night.. I am want to speak to YOU.. would you let me speak because this is the Only thing I can do for right Now.. I want to show YOU this Glass Jar.. I want to take this Glass jar and give it to YOU.. and if you can listen.. I want to tell YOU that I been loving YOU for so Long.. I been loving YOU that I have lost the count.. I started to count in the beginning but I guess I just had to stop.. because the More I love YOU.. the less I counted.. as I am looking at this Glass Jar.. I have stabbed my Heart with the Knife.. it Hurts when the Blade plunged into the center of the Heart.. I felt the Pain.. and started to suffer because of If.. as I watch my Heart struggle for air.. I saw the Blood pouring Out.. and I would say.. It must be Love because I miss YOU.. I started to miss YOU over and over.. that I felt the tears just running down my two eyes.. I can't take it any more because I love YOU.. I can't take this Pain because I be missing YOU like crazy.. when can I see YOU.. is it going to be soon.. Please tell me when can I see YOU.. will you let me see YOU.. or is it going to be never on your end.. I been waiting for YOU.. for a long time I been waiting and just kept on missing YOU.. every time I write YOU a Letter.. and I think of YOU and every time I take a Look at your Picture.. I can feel something inside of me wants to cry.. I want to cry More as I keep on missing YOU.. holding YOU in my arms is my first Wish.. and the second is to tell YOU how much I love YOU and how much I missed you.. that I know one day it needs to stop.. that I do not have to miss YOU any more.. I am standing Out here.. LOOKING UP at the MOON.. when would that TIME BE.. when I can stop be missing YOU.. I would be wiping these tears.. most of the nights are very harsh for Me.. because my arms.. my arms wants to hold YOU.. hold you close and hold you still.. just to feel you close and that I get to call YOU mine forever.. will you Let that Happen to me.. Please tell me that I do have a hope still.. that I still have a chance.. a hope to tell you that I need YOU.. I miss YOU and that I love YOU.. Please give me the hope so that I can dream being US together for ever.. I am just waiting for that day to come.. but some

I would say when.. what if It never happens.. what if you don't want to see Me.. what if YOU are happy being there.. but what I want to say is that I need YOU.. I need you more and more.. so Please tell me that YOU do on the Other side think of me too.. and still there is HOPE for me.. as time goes by.. I start to lose more HOPE.. but when I just think of YOU.. when I say your Name.. call out your Name.. I can feel my Heart once again coming alive.. it is because I know ON my part.. I still do Love YOU and never given up that HOPE on you.. that Hope just to say I love YOU.. the Hope to write YOU a Letter and tell you what is in my Heart.. I just Love YOU.. that I can't live with out you.. that I know that I needs YOU.. and as I am looking at the Little Piano in front of Me and on the Top of the Little Piano is the Glass jar.. looking at my Heart just sitting inside.. my Blood covers and has filled UP.. as I want to show YOU.. I want to show YOU this Heart of Mine.. to tell YOU.. it happens when I think of YOU and when I be missing YOU the Most.. I just can't get YOU off my Mind.. I just can't get YOU off my Head.. off my Heart.. and it feels this way.. LOOKING Up at the MOON.. I feel so sad in the days when I can't see YOU.. only thing my eyes can see is Your Picture.. I guess just the picture just don't cut it when YOU love.. when YOU start to love.. I want More.. More of YOU as I am missing YOU at the same time.. IT did not help at all when the Rain poured down as it showered from the SKY.. it did Not help me at all because I started to miss YOU more and more.. My Heart hurts.. and it aches when I don't see YOU.. that is why I be missing YOU all along.. when can I see YOU.. I am listening to the Song I am playing on this Piano.. of course I am Not a composer.. I can't write any music.. but I have the Letter I have written just for YOU.. Only YOU can hear the Words that is coming Out of My Mouth.. which it was written last Night before I went to Bed.. I just could Not sleep.. I would be tossing and turning on the side.. I would be laying.. Looking at the wall of the ROOM.. my Heart was Beating Hard from the Inside.. which kept me waking UP.. I would try to close the two eyes.. shut I would close.. but I would see YOU in my Head.. in my Mind I see YOU and I would think of YOU.. opening both eyes does Not work because My Heart is beating Hard.. I would sit on top of the bed.. trying to lay back Down and again I would sit.. I would look across is the Desk.. maybe it is telling me to write YOU another Letter.. why do I have to keep On picking UP the Pen.. putting the White Piece of paper before my eyes.. I would pull the chair closer and I would sit.. but the Night.. it is like deep into the Night.. where I am suppose to be sleeping the Most.. But I would have your picture on the Top of the Desk.. I turn on the side looking at the Door.. I see the Little Piano.. it is waiting for Me.. by the Door which it leads me to the Living ROOM.. the Little Piano looks.. and I look at the Little Piano.. it is telling me to Play so that I can tell YOU.. what is IN MY HEART which it says IN my Heart I love YOU.. I love you so Much that I am Not sure how much to Love any More.. do I have to love you so More.. but How BIG and Wide must this Love must carry through.. How can YOU tell.. but I would look at the Little Piano on the side by the door.. and I know.. I may Not be able to play a SONG.. it may Not come Out right.. YOU will not hear it right.. then.. How about the Letter.. maybe the Letter can over come and the Music YOU listen with YOUR ears of the TUNE of this Piano.. it may Not affect Your Hearing Loss.. but when YOU hear the Words.. the Letter.. I will let YOU hear the Letter that I am writing this Very Night.. as I turn the Other way is the Window.. pulling the Curtains UP.. I can see the Window.. and I can see the MOON from where I am sitting in this Room.. and I look at the Moon as I am sitting.. turning to the Moon.. thinking of YOU.. grabbing the Picture and looking at YOU through this Picture.. What am I suppose to do.. when can I see YOU.. when can YOU hear my Heart.. the Out cry that Comes from within me.. I want to tell YOU I love YOU.. I want to say to YOU that I love YOU so Much.. will you let me tell you these words of Mine to YOU.. will you let me ever come close to YOU and tell YOU how much I love YOU.. How about the times having when I really Really Missed YOU.. I want to pour a Wine on the Glass.. and I want to drink.. take a sip of the Wine of the Glass cup.. taking a Sip and when I face you.. when I see YOU.. I will be first approaching YOU.. holding Your Hands.. It has been so Long I have been waiting.. it took more than thousand days.. even ten thousand days had to pass me by.. how many weeks does it needs to pass by for YOU to ever miss Me.. How many Months does it needs to take for YOU to Miss me.. How many years must it pass by for YOU to miss me and see My Heart.. when will YOU KNOW that I be loving YOU for so Long.. do YOU know that every Night I miss YOU.. I can turn.. looking at the MOON.. if YOU ever have some time.. and when the Day turns into Night.. Please step Out side.. just once in a blue MOON will do.. as I be walking Out side.. Holding the Letter In my Hands.. I would be walking and I stop.. I turn to LOOK UP at the MOON.. and I would hold UP the Paper.. the Letter in my Hands.. and I would say.. if YOU hear me.. and the Little Piano is there with Me.. as I turn to LOOK UP at the MOON.. my hands.. my fingers would be pressing the Key Bars.. I am Not sure what kind of sounds YOU can be hearing.. it is good that YOU are ON the Other Side.. if YOU can't hear the Key.. the sounds and the Tunes of this Piano.. I think it can be good for those ears.. instead of hearing the Words that I speak coming from the Heart which I would memorize the Written Words I have written in the Letter for YOU.. YOU may Not hear my words right.. I would be hitting the Key bars.. it is making a lot of sounds and a lot of noises on this Piano.. as I am pressing the Key Bars which it is bring Sounds Out.. I am Looking UP.. turning to the MOON.. and I know.. I can see Your Face inside the Moon.. as I would close my two eyes.. I would say.. DO you Hear Me.. do I must speak Louder to YOU for the waves to go across.. do I needs to Lose my Voice for YOU to hear me Now.. I been waiting for YOU.. but YOU have Not showed UP yet.. I have been waiting for Your Answer.. WHY can't YOU tell me that YOU Miss me.. why can't YOU be truly Honest with me for Once.. Please tell me that YOU love me Too.. Please tell me that YOU also can miss Me.. I been holding IN for a Long time.. I wanted to say it.. to tell YOU that I am missing you so Much right Now.. I am Not even looking at the Key Bars of this Little Piano.. so I have NO idea what I am playing.. If YOU were here.. I know you would tell me to Stop playing on that Little Piano because YOUR ears will Hurt.. and that is why I just can't stop.. if YOU can be hear and hear the sounds of this Little Piano which I am bringing Out some kind of Noise.. YOU will tell me to Stop because It is hurting Your Ears.. that is HOW MY Heart feels at this Point.. that I can't stop that It hurts if I choose to stop.. If I cannot tell YOU that I don't love you.. it hurts me more than the Tune.. the Playing.. the SOUND and the Noise.. It will kill me if YOU tell me to Stop telling YOU that I love YOU.. I can't breath.. I love that I love YOU.. I love the thoughts that I can tell YOU that I love YOU.. to able to tell you this is My Dreams come true.. dreaming of the Day.. I can hold Your hands and truly.. PULL you closer to Me.. and I will speak softly into Your ears.. and I will tell YOU one Hundred times.. How much I love YOU.. and I will tell YOU One thousand times.. how much I will love YOU.. I will cry if I can't say it to YOU any more.. I will sit and ball hard like a Child.. like a baby I can cry if I can't tell YOU that I love YOU.. I have been loving YOU for so Long.. WHY can't YOU see that In me.. I have been here all along.. why can't you accept it.. because it is NOT enough for YOU.. I am trying Hard to tell YOU.. I been here telling YOU that I love YOU.. the Joy that brings into my Heart.. when I am allowed to say it.. to tell it the way it is meant to be said.. I want to tell you that I love YOU.. as I am looking UP at the Moon.. I can feel the tears.. My Heart is burning.. My Heart is beating Hard.. my fingers pressing into the Little Piano.. I am Looking UP at the MOON at Night.. making all kinds of Sounds and Noises YOU just don't want to Hear.. that is why I am here on the Other side which You can't Hear it.. but the Words I am telling.. the Words I been writing to YOU all this time.. Letting YOU know that It is my Heart.. It is the Pencil which I pick UP.. it is the Piece of paper.. and writing to YOU which makes me Happy.. gives me Hopes and to dream Bigger for YOU and to love YOU more and more.. as my fingers stops pressing on the Key bars of this Little Piano.. I would still Look UP at the Moon.. and I would say in the Loud voice.. DO YOU hear Me.. can YOU Please Hear me standing here on the Other side.. I am waiting for YOU.. that is why when YOU take the TIME to come Out.. Please come out at Night.. when YOU can stand out alone.. and YOU can see the MOON above YOU.. what YOU will see is not Me playing on the Little Piano.. YOU are not going to see a Letter with two wings flying down to YOU.. But the MOON is going to show you the Tears that came Out of my eyes.. comes Out from the Heart.. comes Out from my Mind and my thoughts of thinking of YOU.. YOU will see the Moon so differently because the MOON will shows YOU tears.. My Tears because I love YOU.. My Tears because I miss YOU.. My Tears because YOU do Not understand my Heart.. But that is Okay If YOU don't get it now.. YOU may Not understand it ever.. but when A MAN like

Loves YOU.. maybe it can take thousand of Years later.. It can be when I am grey and an Old Man.. dying in the Bed.. it is Okay if YOU do not get it then either.. it can be when YOU come to visit my Own grave.. when I am Gone.. but Know that I loved YOU more than I ever loved myself.. I know that One day.. some day YOU will know who Loved YOU more.. as I am Looking at the MOON above me.. I am looking at the Letter I have written for YOU.. what am I suppose to do with this Letter.. I know that standing here.. LOOKING UP at the Moon.. YOU can't even hear my voice.. YOU can't even hear the Little Piano be playing.. did YOU hear the sounds and noises of this Little Piano.. I wish you can listen to My Heart Beat.. because I been pressing the key bars as I can hear my Own Heart beating for YOU.. thinking of YOU.. wishing to be with YOU.. Looking at your Picture.. wishing that I can be with YOU.. Can YOU hear me on the other side.. that is why I would stand here alone.. LOOKING at the MOON.. I would cry before the Moon.. because I want YOU to Hear Me.. I want you to able to receive what I can give.. I wish that YOU can Hear me.. but All I see is the MOON before me.. It does not Move.. Does not make any kinds of expression.. It does not speak back to Me.. but I still see the MOON standing still.. How do I get this Letter to YOU.. How am I suppose to deliver this Letter to YOU.. can you please show me the way to Your Heart.. please show me How can this Letter get into your hands.. as I grab the Little Piano into my Hands.. and I am walking back to the House.. and slowly I am walking away from the Moon.... the Door opens and I go into the House.. I am in the ROOM.. looking at the Letter on the Top of the desk.. and I am sitting on the Chair.. Looking at the Picture of YOU.. How can this Letter get to YOU.. what am I suppose to do for YOU to know.. that I needs to give YOU this Letter.. and even though I sit here by the desk and I write YOU a Letter.. I am wondering.. DO I ever come cross your Mind.. that means do YOU even read the Letters.. and I would look at Your Picture.. I want YOU to know that I love YOU.. I want you to know that I needs to give you this Letter so that my Heart Knows that I love YOU.. will you accept the Letters I write to YOU.. Please tell me so.. Please tell me that YOU do read it which I give you from the Heart.. I am laying on the Bed.. trying to go back to the bed.. I am turning on the side.. but I know that I can't sleep.. YOU are always on my Mind.. YOU are always in my Heart.. I think of YOU over and over.. NO matter How much I try to do something else.. I keep on think of YOU.. I see YOU everywhere.. what does this Means to YOU.. it means because I love YOU.. I need YOU and I miss YOU.. but I love YOU the Most.. I just can't stop looking at this Little Piano.. why is it keep on telling me to come Near.. and I am thinking of YOU.. I need your Heart.. I need your Heart here with Me.. that is only way I can tell YOU what is IN my Heart.. I am asking YOU.. Heart to Heart.. Please.. tell me can I have your Heart close to Me.. so that I can tell YOU.. I love YOU.. I want to tell YOU that I love YOU.. I want to say that I love you like I am so Crazy in Love with YOU.. Please.. How can I have your Heart close to Me.. I turn to look at the Little Piano.. it is telling me to play a tune.. telling me to touch the Key bars.. that Only it is fingers away from the Touch.. if I can only play.. If I can only write the Music.. compose a Song.. write a Music so that YOU can hear something Out of this Little Piano.. but.. I know that I can't play a tune.. I can't make a sound.. it just be so noisy in your ears.. the tunes will Not sound right which it should make you feel something very special but If I play on this Little Piano.. instead of smiling.. YOU can be angry with me instead saying.. WHY can't I play a Good music that makes you smile and makes you happy.. that is why I am telling YOU I can't play.. but the Little Piano who is in my room.. is looking at me telling me.. I want to play something for YOU.. to tell you that I love YOU.. I have the Recorder in my Hand.. and I put a tape inside the recorder.. and on the Top of the desk is the Empty Glass Jar.. inside is Your Picture.. I took your Picture and someone was able to make it pretty big.. the Picture I put inside the Glass Jar.. I can see your Beautiful Face.. only if YOU were in this room.. Only If I can have your Heart.. and Place your Heart inside the Glass Jar next to Your Picture.. I am able to tell YOU something.. I would turn to look at the Little Piano.. I would ask.. would you let me Play.. even though I would Not be able to play anything.. I can push the Play Button of the Recorder and the Instrument of a Piano.. a Professional Pianist can Play.. I would stand next to the Little Piano.. can Act like I can Play.. when YOU hear the sound of the Music coming Out of the Recorder of playing the Piano.. I would turn and I would LOOK at the Desk.. I would look at your Picture.. I would Look at the Heart.. only If I have your Heart.. I be saying to YOU.. I have written YOU a Letter.. I wrote it last Night.. I was thinking about this very night so I had to write it.. and I had to memorize what I wrote to YOU in the Letter to tell YOU.. Can YOU hear the Song.. the Instrumental of this Piano Playing.. If YOU look towards me who is standing by the Little Piano.. YOU can be pretty confused because It looks like I am playing the Piece of Music.. Yes.. my fingers are pressing into the Key Bars of this Little Piano.. but.. I have turned off the sound that comes Out of this Piano because.. the recorder is playing instead.. Can YOU hear the Music of this Piano Playing.. Please if YOU can't.. Open your ears.. Please tell me that YOU can hear Me.. Please.. open your Heart for me and listen to the Sound of this Music of Piano.. the Instrumental Playing.. I want to give you this Song.. I want to tell YOU that I love YOU.. I know that YOU are hearing the Sound of this Little Piano Playing.. it is what I will say to YOU.. that I love YOU.. My Heart can't take it no more.. My fingers pressing.. hands wants to pound on this Key Bars on this Piano.. when ever I think of YOU.. when ever I want to say I love YOU.. I can hear my own Heart.. telling me It wants to beat faster.. it beats faster because I needs to say it and tell YOU that I love YOU.. as I turn to look at the desk.. Looking at the Glass Jar.. I am looking at your Picture.. and.. Only if Your Heart be placed inside.. I be crying Out Loud.. I love YOU.. you do not know what YOU have done to me but I want to say that I love YOU.. as I turn to look at the Little Piano.. I feel so sad.. I feel so happy but sad again.. because all I see is myself.. I don't see YOU.. But I needs to see YOU.. I want to see you.. I needs your Heart here with me.. so that I can tell your Heart.. I do not know How long.. but I have to say to Your Heart.. I love you.. How Long.. I will say it I love YOU.. looking at the Little Piano.. I know that It feels My Heart.. it knows My Heart because it knows my Heart.. I believe the Little Piano hears my voice.. as I am playing and touching the Key bars.. it knows that I love YOU.. knowing how much I needs to be with YOU.. but I will say.. YOU are so Far off.. WHY do you have to be so Far that I can't see YOU.. I wants to find a way where YOU can be near.. will you let me come close to YOU.. Please let me know because.. I want to take this Little Piano with Me.. and stand next to YOU.. I would turn to LOOK at you.. and I will tell YOU.. this is the Little Piano I was talking to Your About.. every Night.. I would turn to look at this Little Piano.. I feel stuffy inside.. sometimes I feel frustrated because I want to be close to YOU.. when I feel so stuffy inside.. I get close to this Little Piano.. and I would turn it on.. where when My Fingers touch the key bars.. and it presses into it.. YOU can hear the sounds of each key bar when YOU press it down.. it makes a noises.. and as my fingers touch and presses into the key bars.. I want to play you a Song.. making a Music and I would face the Wall.. Only if YOU can be right there.. Only if YOU can be that close to Me.. and I would say.. WHY do you have to be so Far.. that I can't find YOU any where.. I can't see YOU any where.. I want to tell YOU so that YOU can hear me but I know that NO matter how much I speak.. or how much my fingers press into the Key bars of this Little Piano and YOU can hear sounds out of the Little Piano.. YOU can't hear me.. it breaks my Heart.. I needs to say It.. I needs to tell YOU that I love YOU.. if I say it to YOU.. I know that I can see YOU to get a certain response.. but in this ROOM.. with the Glass Jar and Your Picture inside of it.. YOU can't never hear me.. that is why it kills me inside because I want to play for you something.. but I know that I can't.. I know that I can't play you a song.. even if YOU were standing here close to me.. I know that the sound will Not come out right.. but. I know that as long as I have a Heart who loves YOU.. I can at least tell YOU what is in my Heart.. that I wants to be with YOU.. I wants to be close to YOU and that I miss YOU.. that I want to say How much I love YOU.. No matter how many times I say it in this ROOM.. you will never hear my words.. this is what is hurting Me the Most.. this is what is killing me inside that I needs to say it to YOU.. but I can't.. I needs to tell YOU but I can't.. the word Can't is driving me crazy right Now.. as I stop the recorder.. and I am standing by the Little Piano.. I am aching so Much.. It is hurting me so Much.. this Pain.. when YOU love so much.. it can also Hurt you the Most because it drives YOU mad.. it drives YOU crazy to see your Face but I can't.. so If you are telling me to wait.. How Long must I wait for YOU to know Your Heart.. How long must I wait.. as I open the recorder.. I put another tape inside the recorder