A New Agora
A New Agora
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The Thread of Dai-Ohm (Live) | Mazy Edwin
Through the fog, in a shadowed forest
ghosts appear before us, calling your name
looking closer, through your eyes
they recognize, one thing
you are her, and she is you
two lives tied by one thread running through
spin me around, upside down
through my eyes I see a new vision
lifting me away
light waves awaken you
and rain washes you down a river
to the end of time
over the edge
see shimmers in waves of the abyss
like an infinite night sky
and would you go over the edge
and close your eyes, and close your eyes
would you fall, would you fly
would you crash against the wall
see the churning waves, and the foam
would you be saved, by letting go
two divided, one goes alone
submerged in the void
no sense of home, home, home
two divided, one goes alone
no sense of home, home, home, oh-ohm
one step forward, on the path
you’ve been here before, arriving at last
two becoming one, one goes alone
dissolving to none, returning home
two becoming one, one goes alone,
dissolving to none, all is dai-ohm,
dai-ohm, dai-ohm, dai-ohm
spin me around, upside down,
unraveling, all things I’ve seen
spin me around, upside down,
unraveling, all things I’ve seen
I’m letting go
Composed by Mazy Edwin Aug 2021
Entered in the Charleston Autumn Competition 2024
Contact the creator: anewagora@yahoo.com
Переглядів: 108

Відео

he fell from grace, from the light of god
Переглядів 502 місяці тому
grief is the price of love
Touching The Source | Full Film
Переглядів 1,1 тис.7 місяців тому
This is a story of death and rebirth, a story of revival after nonexistence. After a woman has an otherworldly mystical experience, she is changed deeply, physically inside out. The change is so profound, she detransitions from being a transgender man after 27 years. She embarks on an investigation, a journey to paint the spiritual realm- and the Creator of the universe, as she witnessed it. Em...
know your nature, you forgot
Переглядів 1397 місяців тому
This is a story of death and rebirth, a story of revival after nonexistence. After a woman has an otherworldly mystical experience, she is changed deeply, physically inside out. The change is so profound, she detransitions from being a transgender man after 27 years. She embarks on an investigation, a journey to paint the spiritual realm- and the Creator of the universe, as she witnessed it. Wa...
Total Shutdown | Touching the Source (clip)
Переглядів 297 місяців тому
This is a story of death and rebirth, a story of revival after nonexistence. After a woman has an otherworldly mystical experience, she is changed deeply, physically inside out. The change is so profound, she detransitions from being a transgender man after 27 years. She embarks on an investigation, a journey to paint the spiritual realm- and the Creator of the universe, as she witnessed it. Wa...
First Glimpse | Touching the Source (clip)
Переглядів 787 місяців тому
This is a story of death and rebirth, a story of revival after nonexistence. After a woman has an otherworldly mystical experience, she is changed deeply, physically inside out. The change is so profound, she detransitions from being a transgender man after 27 years. She embarks on an investigation, a journey to paint the spiritual realm- and the Creator of the universe, as she witnessed it. Wa...
Touching the Source | Trailer
Переглядів 5288 місяців тому
This is a story of death and rebirth, a story of revival after nonexistence. After a woman has an otherworldly mystical experience, she is changed deeply, physically inside out. The change is so profound, she detransitions from being a transgender man after 27 years. She embarks on an investigation, a journey to paint the spiritual realm- and the Creator of the universe, as she witnessed it. Wa...
What Caused My Transgenderism?
Переглядів 6689 місяців тому
Trans and Detrans Support: discord.gg/EKMZHJ8QAE 0:00 Intro 2:35 The Metacrisis 5:08 Health 8:30 Authenticity 12:55 Suppression & Denial 15:02 The Matrix 17:07 Truth & The Culture War 18:56 The Unknown 20:23 The Inner Voice 24:30 Listening to yourself 25:56 my changing worldview 27:45 peace through physical exercise 28:54 The Inner Voice returns
Shell of a Man / Nature of a Woman
Переглядів 38211 місяців тому
I was a Shell of a Man turnin brittle in these bones in the desert sun slowly turnin to stone I was a Dead Man's Shadow no life in these eyes when you struck me down from a thundering sky I fell into the mud, palms flat on this Earth oh I was a Shell of a Man turnin brittle in these bones yet there's a Nature inside and she was screaming at me to come Home clawing Her Hands through me diggin in...
Detrans and discovering our deeper nature
Переглядів 197Рік тому
Trans and Detrans Support: discord.gg/EKMZHJ8QAE
Detransition and a Song about Healing
Переглядів 879Рік тому
Trans and Detrans Support: discord.gg/EKMZHJ8QAE on a sunny day in the field I see flowers bloom, golden orange and blue walking closer down the riverside I see a forest, on a dirt path before us and you ask me why I’m here listen to the wind through the trees and the birds of the forest, the shadows of the night and the moon before us. drink the water of the river and the cold of the night, th...
Redesigned Frankensteins | Mazy Edwin
Переглядів 124Рік тому
Buy This Track on BandCamp: mazyedwin.bandcamp.com/track/redesigned-frankensteins some people in the world look like monsters broken and rebuilt, redesigned frankensteins but if you take a closer look, you'd be surprised by what you find because eyes are the windows to the world, and every window is a mirror when you take a closer look, you find that you see yourself clearer The monsters may be...
The Youth Independence Crisis | Losing Shelter (Clip)
Переглядів 87Рік тому
Losing Shelter: The true story of a teenager liberated by a youth housing program, and his hero's journey to discover self-determination. As a youth mentor, he finds the nonprofits once responsible for his empowerment have become corrupted by a culture and ideology of victimhood. Watch the full documentary: ua-cam.com/video/p5mOJVrNcfA/v-deo.html Buy my youth independence guide, Willpowerful fo...
Safety Nets | Losing Shelter (Clip)
Переглядів 47Рік тому
Losing Shelter: The true story of a teenager liberated by a youth housing program, and his hero's journey to discover self-determination. As a youth mentor, he finds the nonprofits once responsible for his empowerment have become corrupted by a culture and ideology of victimhood. Watch the full documentary: ua-cam.com/video/p5mOJVrNcfA/v-deo.html Buy my youth independence guide, Willpowerful fo...
Booth Brown House | Losing Shelter (Clip)
Переглядів 38Рік тому
Losing Shelter: The true story of a teenager liberated by a youth housing program, and his hero's journey to discover self-determination. As a youth mentor, he finds the nonprofits once responsible for his empowerment have become corrupted by a culture and ideology of victimhood. Watch the full documentary: ua-cam.com/video/p5mOJVrNcfA/v-deo.html Buy my youth independence guide, Willpowerful fo...
Daring Greatly | Losing Shelter (Clip)
Переглядів 24Рік тому
Daring Greatly | Losing Shelter (Clip)
Trailer: Losing Shelter
Переглядів 201Рік тому
Trailer: Losing Shelter
Meaningful Action and The Great Simplification
Переглядів 1,1 тис.2 роки тому
Meaningful Action and The Great Simplification
the secret is to identify the need
Переглядів 962 роки тому
the secret is to identify the need
Where do you start?
Переглядів 2142 роки тому
Where do you start?
Creating Refuge in This World
Переглядів 972 роки тому
Creating Refuge in This World
Better Than I - in a chapel
Переглядів 862 роки тому
Better Than I - in a chapel
The Magic of Self-Determination
Переглядів 1263 роки тому
The Magic of Self-Determination
spiritfall
Переглядів 493 роки тому
spiritfall
Holding Nonprofits Accountable
Переглядів 2353 роки тому
Holding Nonprofits Accountable
The Thread of Dai-Ohm
Переглядів 1783 роки тому
The Thread of Dai-Ohm
Kimball Court: A Case Study of a Failed Program
Переглядів 5963 роки тому
Kimball Court: A Case Study of a Failed Program
From Dependence to Self-Determination, Mapped
Переглядів 1593 роки тому
From Dependence to Self-Determination, Mapped
✨💫Corkscrew | Mazy Edwin 💫✨
Переглядів 1143 роки тому
✨💫Corkscrew | Mazy Edwin 💫✨

КОМЕНТАРІ

  • @za90909
    @za90909 4 дні тому

    These are great points. Found your channel thru the Kimball Court video.

  • @premierefinishes
    @premierefinishes 7 днів тому

    We need more folks like your self to get this message out to the public!

  • @freshproduce2170
    @freshproduce2170 26 днів тому

    Very scenic and powerful✨

  • @freshproduce2170
    @freshproduce2170 26 днів тому

    Beautiful piece of music!

  • @melissaoconnell5648
    @melissaoconnell5648 Місяць тому

    24:00 Your telling of what brought you tears resonates so deeply, touching tenderness in meeting our most basic universal needs. I'm with you in the need, want, desire for generating and partaking in more of that genuine authentic care. Grateful for you sharing your intimate journey being in transformative time for you. Who doesn't want to be seen, heard, appreciated - understood, valued, cherished, loved, respected, honored as they are.....? Right down to the core. To feel whole unto one's self, unto the whole of collective being....the universe and multifluous life. Undoubtedly so many criss-crossing perspectives for the multi-faceted gems and jewels we are in being. The beauty being in less 'black and white', 'this or that' thinking - finding the 'ands' in life to bridge us. Love that you include the excerpt for Drew Brophy's NDE to emphasize what came into being for you - at that point thereafter. I had to really give pause after viewing the film - for all it brought up in the experience of NDE's and their 'neverending' remembering-awakening that reconnects to the synchronous, timeless whole of the infinite -&- everlasting. Layers of sheer oscillating awe intersecting in all directions/dimensionality. For those who - in that return.... It makes you view re-embodying in a whole new way. You are SO changed for the experience/s. Here's to entering that linimnal space and how art, music and creativity spill and speaks through us!! ❤ You let it ALL pour through your being.... the universe giving way. Found your comment on the 'Invisible People' channel after viewing 'How Hennepin County is Ending Homelessness'. Here's to person-centered, self-determining, self-directed practices and meeting people where they're at to encourage community 👐🏼ellness. Inspirational seeing y☀️u fly free 🥲😌👋🏼🥰 May humanity keep finding ways to be more connective, gentle, curious, receptive, supportive. BlesSings & Rainbow 🌈 connections to Y🤩U!!

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora Місяць тому

      @@melissaoconnell5648 thank you so much. I posted on that video in reference to my documentary on corruption in youth service and housing nonprofits in the Twin Cities, which is called Losing Shelter. Completely different topic, but I'm so glad you had a deep experience with this film. It sounds like you've had spiritual experiences / a transition towards awakening as well. Good luck on your journey 🙏

  • @valentinaruseva7612
    @valentinaruseva7612 3 місяці тому

    Beautiful song, beautiful soul ❤

  • @BillyBasd
    @BillyBasd 5 місяців тому

    Your work deserves more views. You'll get them. Keep going, don't ever give up on sharing the message! Thank you for the message of hope

  • @BillyBasd
    @BillyBasd 5 місяців тому

    Song at the beginning was very good. I'm enjoying your content.

  • @TheLaRell
    @TheLaRell 5 місяців тому

    It is so clear that those of us who go through such an extreme identity shift and spiritual awakening, become aware of the human condition in ways that most are completely unaware of! ♥♥♥

  • @TheLaRell
    @TheLaRell 5 місяців тому

    I love that you have this awareness that you can communicate with the creator through the noise. I have recently come to gain a whole new understanding of how energy, and energetic communication comes through actual "sound". Vibration. Frequency. And human beings for so many centuries have been programmed against this concept. Programmed to believe that we are something different than we actually are. Consciousness having a temporary physical experience for the sake of having physical experience. And therefore we indeed have the ability to communicate with the field. With the creator, with God, with source, through this beautiful nervous system with which we have been blessed that allows for a bridge between the physical and the non-physical. It sounds like you have a better understanding about what "creator" is than most who reduce it to simply Jesus. 🙂

  • @calebgilbreath6116
    @calebgilbreath6116 5 місяців тому

    I just want to say. I’m proud of you. This is a beautiful, venerable, vulnerable, artistic piece. The video is filled with obvious passion and inspiration. Most of all I am full of resonant joy at your finding the truth. As it is for me a creative individual like you, a hard thing to convey, so it is for you. Thank you for this piece and may you fulfill your call by the Creator, Origin and End. Much love to you my new sister in Christ. ❤❤❤

  • @RachelRichards
    @RachelRichards 5 місяців тому

    A discord buddy of mine sent me your channel. I love this video, and frankly, it was therapeutic for me. You talk about a spiritual awakening and change, that everything feels transformed. I can identify with that 100%, but I am still transgender. I stopped eating grains, lost weight, started lifting weights, ensured I got daily sunlight, found new hobbies (especially houseplants), and take supplements. I feel healed and renewed. People think we (transgender people) are some wicked, predatory presence- but we're human just like anybody else.

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 5 місяців тому

      Wow that's an incredible experience! I actually had other awakening experiences prior this one and was still transgender thereafter. I guess this is just the journey I've ended up on, it continues to evolve. Thank you so much for taking interest in my videos and your feedback. I run a support group for trans and detrans people on Discord. The goal is to find universal healing together in a totally open ended space. I'm reframing the issues, less concerned with scrutinizing whether people should be trans or not, and more creating a refuge where people can relax and explore what they really need. You would be a valuable contributer. The link to join is on my channel. I'd love to talk more.

  • @demi8890
    @demi8890 5 місяців тому

    These comments saying "God makes no mistakes / we are made in his image" so you realise that applies to pedophiles and rapists too yes? "Made in his image"...? I'm sorry you experienced gender confusion but to suggest that those who were not confused should not be who they are is wild. You want us to accept that there is a God whos' path we should walk, you should be able to accept that there are those who have different Gods with different viewpoints, or who do not choose to follow any path besides their own, whether that leads to transition or not. Be an accepting, loving person - you're just disrespecting your God's will otherwise.

  • @barbararivera2380
    @barbararivera2380 5 місяців тому

    Omg! FASCINATING! I and here because of your JP/Brett Cooper comment. I hope one day JP will interview you.

  • @unicorn14
    @unicorn14 5 місяців тому

    Thank you for this, I'm struggling with my feelings right now as a transman. I need to reflect and make changes in my life, this was a sign.

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 5 місяців тому

      I'm glad you're here. You are welcome to join my trans and detrans support group on Discord. The link is on my channel.

    • @unicorn14
      @unicorn14 5 місяців тому

      @@anewagora Thanks I joined.

  • @jennjusen7102
    @jennjusen7102 5 місяців тому

    Wow, this is resonating with my experience on any level. I am a so called desister and only started my conscious healing journey 5 1/2 years ago. I am 43 now but despite my raised level of consciousness now and having also had an experience of being in a different realm once and also hearing „the voice“ one time it‘s still hard and I really needed to be re-assured and hear exactly this right now. Thank you so very much for speaking out. You‘re a wonderful being. 🙏🏼💚

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 5 місяців тому

      WOW that is astounding! I'm amazed to hear how you've had similar experiences, especially with the Inner Voice. I'd love to hear more about your story. You are also welcome to join my Trans & Detrans support Discord that is focused on health, healing and spiritual development. It's very open-ended for everyone's unique experiences.

  • @seaglasscolor
    @seaglasscolor 5 місяців тому

    This song is beautiful…. love the minor chords.

  • @FERGX12
    @FERGX12 6 місяців тому

    Thank you for sharing your experience. I do not believe in god, but i thank you for finding light. Yours is a victory for humanity. Good luck with life my friend.

  • @cestmoi4532
    @cestmoi4532 6 місяців тому

    Thank you for sharing this meaningful and creative endeavor! ❤

  • @tonyhoffman3309
    @tonyhoffman3309 6 місяців тому

    Great Clips used to illustrate the issues which led to what happened and continues happening in so many countries in the developed world, and how different approaches/ideological frameworks which have contributed to worsening the problems vs approaches and principle values which are actually helpful.

  • @hamesparde9888
    @hamesparde9888 6 місяців тому

    私はねこがだいすきですよ!

  • @hamesparde9888
    @hamesparde9888 6 місяців тому

    Even though there wasn't any Thrash involved I still found this quite enjoyable. You are very good at guitar. I like your lyrics too.

  • @andymilburn2163
    @andymilburn2163 6 місяців тому

    Mazy, I just listened to your interview with Benjamin and that brought me here. This is the first of your videos I have watched. I just wanted to say, as others have commented, you come across as a beautiful, thoughtful and very talented person. You have so much to offer the world and I send every good wish for your continued recovery and your future. Good friends are a reflection of ourselves. If there is such a thing as karma in the world it exists in how we treat others. Thank you for sharing your story

  • @cassiasnow
    @cassiasnow 6 місяців тому

    Very beautiful ❤️

  • @ccg1404
    @ccg1404 6 місяців тому

    Worthy of Morrissey

  • @ccg1404
    @ccg1404 6 місяців тому

    Just came from Benny Boyce, this is very good, well done!

  • @jonathanperkins589
    @jonathanperkins589 6 місяців тому

    Good work, describing, at least attempting to describe, the ineffable Transcendental experience of God. And good job making this video too! It takes a good deal of courage in the current political environment!

  • @anewagora
    @anewagora 6 місяців тому

    The song featured at the beginning is in my music video, called Shell of a Man / Nature of a Woman. You can watch it here: ua-cam.com/video/BwSxYYHfPyU/v-deo.htmlsi=zPMZxDVnoPW0rW0T

  • @GThomas-qq6mp
    @GThomas-qq6mp 6 місяців тому

    I also come from Brett's video with JP. You still have a lot to cover in life. Being high in openess drags you into all kind of places and at some point you collide with something. You find something that is part of you. Cherish that. Kindest regards 🙏

  • @justinludeman8424
    @justinludeman8424 6 місяців тому

    I trust that you have more views from this, primarily because you have made something honest, vital, and beautiful... I was directed here from a comment you left on Brett Cooper's episode on Jordan Peterson's channel. There were many moments herein that touched me, despite our lives and likeness being disparate. I wish you well. 🙏🏼❤️

  • @anewagora
    @anewagora 6 місяців тому

    My music is gradually being produced and released on BandCamp for purchase: mazyedwin.bandcamp.com/ You can also make donations that will allow me to keep releasing the full versions of these songs: ko-fi.com/anewagora

  • @odawgbrazy14
    @odawgbrazy14 6 місяців тому

    God isn’t “broken”. we’re made perfectly in His image

  • @robertmagwood99
    @robertmagwood99 6 місяців тому

    Hi. In terms of the creator, there is only one truth, and that is in Jesus Christ. (John 14:6) I agree that many people are in denial of what is good for them and their health, but he made us man and woman, (Genesis 1:27-28; Genesis 2:22-23) both according to their respective roles, that the man is the head and the woman under him, in the sense that Christ loved and put his own life down for the church (Ephesians 5:25-33) He died for our sins so that whoever believes in him will never perish, but have everlasting life, (John 3:16) and there is no other way but through him. (John 14:6) When one confesses their sins and believes in their hearts that he is LORD, then they will be saved (Romans 10:9-13), not by our own works, but by faith alone, (Ephesians 2:1-10) our works being a sign and the fruits of our salvation (James 2:14-26) He seeks to have a relationship with all who are willing to come to him honestly in truth and spirit and turn from their sins so that they would have eternal life through him, and he is faithful to forgive. (Mark 3:28; 1 John 1:9) I find these channels to be helpful for understanding scripture more in depth. I thank you for your time. ua-cam.com/play/PL0A13s_gMBQCUOrh_vsxde6mYeQZsvVZB.html&si=tqd84bsOyipdWAKw youtube.com/@TheBeginningOfWisdom?si=6Oc77qbHiAOwwTcm youtube.com/@MikeWinger?si=zavBPGGKZdU1eVfP

  • @ikicove
    @ikicove 6 місяців тому

    can you put this on apple music?

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 6 місяців тому

      I have a Bandcamp and I'm slowly releasing fully produced songs. This is still a demo, I hope to release it later. I'll look into getting my music on more platforms for sale. My BandCamp is here: mazyedwin.bandcamp.com/

  • @dewilew2137
    @dewilew2137 6 місяців тому

    Do you have kids? I’m curious to know how you know how “a lot of adults” relate to their kids.

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 6 місяців тому

      In this video I was mostly referring to my childhood with my friends and how we were treated by adults. However, I also lived in a youth housing program as a teenager that led me to work in the field of youth mentorship. I befriended a mentor that worked in my program who has four kids and we have discussions. More recently I've worked as a music teacher and in younger childcare, and have become really close with my best friend's family. Besides all that, because youth work is a passion of mine, I tend to get into conversations with people on it anyways.

  • @tylerolejnicak5481
    @tylerolejnicak5481 6 місяців тому

    I'm envious of what you appear to have had. An intense, white light spiritual moment. I've been open to becoming more spiritual in the path I've chosen, but it seems my spiritual development will be of the more subtle, educational variety. Good luck on your journey and recovery!

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 6 місяців тому

      I suggest you explore physical practices to see what feels good, powerful, and may help you feel subtler things that we can miss with the ordinary eye. Yoga has been incredibly helpful for me. Try doing it in a quiet area in nature and expose yourself to time in nature without the noise of internet tech or distractions, for increasingly longer periods of time. Chanting has also been hypnotic for me and it gets you into an altered state of being. Lastly, trauma therapy called Somatic Experiencing was an absolutely integral key in my healing, which suddenly threw me into breakthroughs that made me feel vibrant and alive. Usually I would go through emotional toxins that need to be expressed first, like periods of rage, crying or fear, and once that is purged there is a deep underground of vibrant strength and awe-striking peace. This can be felt as the presence of God. Good luck on your journey.

  • @alyqat4
    @alyqat4 6 місяців тому

    God is amazing. Love that you have the courage to share your story you’re beautiful inside and out. ❤ Love the insights on identity. Touching the spiritual realm is humbling in the best way.

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 6 місяців тому

      Thank you for your passion and clarity! It is inspiring to hear a sense of worship and awe for what is Divine and for God's presence in our lives.

    • @alyqat4
      @alyqat4 6 місяців тому

      @@anewagora aw you’re welcome. I read your comments on Reddit about writing a book and I think you should go for it. 🩷🙏🏼

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 6 місяців тому

      @@alyqat4 I've received a lot of positive feedback, I'm gonna go for it!

  • @DorianPaige00
    @DorianPaige00 6 місяців тому

    Conservatives create narratives because they want to end hormonal and surgical treatment for patients especially for adolescents. They want to legally tie the doctors hands which is the only way to take this option off of the table. Transgenders have to fight back and hard because their doctors are being called criminals and they are being called immoral, disorderly, and mentally ill.

  • @freshproduce2170
    @freshproduce2170 7 місяців тому

    Insightful!

  • @LaytonObserves
    @LaytonObserves 8 місяців тому

    Looking forward to this ✌

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 7 місяців тому

      thank you so much for checking this out :) The film premieres this Saturday, April 13th at 10a Central, I think that's 4p in the UK ;)

  • @AKheon
    @AKheon 8 місяців тому

    A very personal singer-songwriter piece with an interestingly freely flowing structure. Creates a variety of emotions. I'm not sure what it reminds me of, exactly, since I don't listen to this style very often... but I like it.

  • @lunarelaxation
    @lunarelaxation 8 місяців тому

    Wonderful❤❤thank you very much ❤😍subscribe & like2

  • @pas9191
    @pas9191 9 місяців тому

    Hi! I appreciate your way of conveying your feelings to us. It's been very helpful! I recently got interested into MBTI / cognitive functions, and I've wanted to try and relate your way of expressing these experiences with the model. Would you be okay with sharing, if you happen to know, your personality type, or plan on maybe doing the assessment in the future?

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 9 місяців тому

      Sure, thanks for your interest. I'm an ENFP. I don't study Meyers-Briggs at all but I do have basic awareness of my type. Let me know if you want to discuss anything further.

  • @KaliaDragon
    @KaliaDragon 9 місяців тому

    It's crazy how much I connect with this, I felt the same way growing up, but I am a boy instead. My parents were always trying to push me and put me into a mould that I just didn't fit in at all. Telling me I had to be this way, or do this thing, and do it there way, there was no room for me in anything. I have a lot of pent up trauma around that and had a critical life event where I showed my true feelings and my internal struggle and trusted adults only to be shut down in the worst way possible. Sometimes I would try and test the waters and be myself only to be rejected and snuffed out over and over and over. Since then I have developed a second self, an internal self like you are saying, I was always curious about being a girl, and what it was like, and I had this pain, this desperate personal pain even when I was 6 years old, just desperate to be accepted for me, recognized, and appreciated for who I naturally am. I contained that true self inside to protect myself and became very arrogant because no-one understands. I contained my authenticity and became authoritarian externally to cover up myself, to protect myself from that neglect/abuse. It makes me want to fly away as far as I can from my external self and become something totally unlike what my parents want me to be, what society wants me to be as male. I feel like I want to be a girl to because I felt like I could become liked, or desirable, or that my natural inclinations would be better accepted. I feel like as a women I could get to a point where I finally like myself for who I am because I can be rid of all that external influence. I am at a cross roads in my journey where for the last few years I have been heavily considering transitioning. I have tried different methods DIY because I don't want others to know and I don't want their influence on my choice. I just want to escape my pain, but I have just found this video and I am starting to think outside this more. I know that it isn't a perfect answer to my problems, I know that there are other struggles on the other side that await me too, and so I am indecisive. I have been fighting with my spiritually this entire time as it was something else that I feel I believe in but was also forced upon me by my up bringing. Can I do this and cut myself off from my creator, can I do it and still have a relationship with God, I feel like I am being torn in two.

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 9 місяців тому

      WOW. Thank you for sharing, it is such a wonder and mystery, yet also feels like truth revealed, when we are all somewhat lost and searching, then find the similarities between us. That truth could be discovered together, and with that, liberation from suffering. I've started to think in the last few years that humanity has actually fallen from nature, our own nature and the ecosystem beyond us, and this is a core cause of our suffering now. It causes a deeper kind of ignorance: ignorance of our own human needs. This is integral to the process I'm going through, to my newly evolving philosophy. You might not know how best to meet your own needs yet. A lot of us are in this position. I witness this ignorance of human needs all around me. People would rather smoke when they're hungry than investigate what food would actually be fulfilling. Bad strategies to meet our needs are a lose-lose situation longterm; it meets the need momentarily, but at a cost that eats away at us over time. Conversely, once we find a strategy to meet our needs that really works, we can see it working by making us stronger, wiser, and more capable over time. I have no idea if you should transition and live as a woman, or not, or anything in-between. I will say that for me, it has been a lot easier no longer being transgender than what I was before. As a transman, I made the best of my circumstances and body problems. There was never a cure, only treatment and social behavior to feel as close to your true self as possible. But there are things in common across my life as both a transman and a detrans woman. One is that the physical exercises and spiritual practices I developed helped me tremendously- both in healing as a transman, and eventually making it possible to be healed by the Creator in a way I NEVER could have imagined. I urge you to explore physical exercises and spiritual practices like pranayama (Wim Hof breathing is a type of pranayama). Keep coming back to the physical sensations in your body, and spend time in silence asking yourself what you really want. I've been through intense trauma and it leaves us disconnected from that gut instinct (intuition and authenticity). I also did really well with Somatic Experiencing trauma therapy, it is more physical than mental. I have a hunch that you will go on a journey where, in some way, you need to express those authentic parts of yourself. You will discover more of yourself as you express. And after a while, that journey will come to a close and you will find Home Within, whatever that may be. Good luck, you can reach me on Discord if you want: hazy.in.blue (previously JackEdwin#1133).

  • @tatsurikugame4628
    @tatsurikugame4628 9 місяців тому

    A lot of your experiences are similar to mine, though I never detransitioned because I never transitioned in the first place surgically because I felt like it wouldn't fix the issue inside me. I refused to take on the labels because I refused to be lumped in. I also heard a deep voice at the age of 14/15 that said "wait", when I was crying myself asleep night after night, at my worst. I also moved out at age 17. But I am definitetly transgendered or have body dysmorphia etc. I also didnt really get that I had to be female until age 10 when I started getting breasts. I tried tearing them off with my bare hands in the moment my mother told me why my nipples were swollen, and they already hurt. She said it would only make them bigger, to get me to stop. Before that I think I just thought there was still time for lower region to develop more. I was raised wearing my older brothers hand-me-downs and played all the things he liked playing and we were less than 2 years apart in age so we were very close. Even when I moved out, I moved out with him, and whatever he did, I matched. I was still me, and artistic and into music, unlike him, but if he drank 12 shots of tequila, my 116 lb self drank 12 shots of tequila, ykwim? It never occurred to me that I couldn't because I was born a female because most of the time I forget about that, until someone reminds me. Anyway, I'm just curious about you as a person because of these things, and I appreciate your bravery sharing your experience. If you ever need someone to talk to or just would like a new friend I'd be down. 👋🏻

    • @anewagora
      @anewagora 9 місяців тому

      Wow! This is astounding how much your descriptions line up with me. Thank you for taking the time to engage, I'm working through some topics trying to figure out how I could fit into all of this mess and be helpful. People get so enraged on trans and detrans topics and cling to their own theories, that are often outlandish and clueless about real people's experiences. Besides all that, I'm bored and frustrated with the shallow nature of these conversations and hope I can help highlight deeper meaning that could sustain people, that could help us discover inner peace and healing. You can talk to me more on Discord if you want: hazy.in.blue (used to be JackEdwin#1133).

    • @tatsurikugame4628
      @tatsurikugame4628 9 місяців тому

      @anewagora More incredible similarities... My discord has the name jack at the start of it 😅 so I'll add you. Depending if you notice the add, or this reply first, that's me! 👍🏻 Adding you now Feb 5th at about 1:30 in the morning mountain time. Lol.

  • @ericagardens1234
    @ericagardens1234 10 місяців тому

    excellent

  • @vytus__
    @vytus__ 10 місяців тому

    Excellent video, great topic! Keep it up.

  • @mygoogleaccountiuseforthin7920
    @mygoogleaccountiuseforthin7920 10 місяців тому

    💩

  • @mygoogleaccountiuseforthin7920
    @mygoogleaccountiuseforthin7920 10 місяців тому

    Stank 💩

  • @Medusa-
    @Medusa- 11 місяців тому

    Looks like constant garbage. What a sad place to be