Відео

As an elementary educator, I cannot agree more! Thank you for saying what most don't want to hear!

Mine is constantly in a sport … I skipped one winter and completely regretted it … although I hate “wearing him out” it beats the alternative … my mom kept me constantly busy too but when your an ADD adult this energy runs out and you have to figure out how to be idle sometimes in a healthy way !

Reminds me of when I suddenly can't string a single sentence together out of nowhere. It comes and goes, but when it does, it gets bad, best I can describe it.

In this video you talk about walking away as the boundary and response when the child is exhibiting big dysregulated behaviors. That doesn’t work when a child is attacking a sibling. Any recommendations for a boundary to set with a child in that instance? The sibling getting attacked is not mature enough to walk away yet.

Thanks for all the videos you post. They have helped me to better understand my 11-year-old son who has ADHD and they've helped me to restructure the relationship we have.

Just checking. Child not willing to do chore, throws tantrum, “let me know when you’re ready?” Chore doesn’t get done.

Please reply....my story is....i have found an amazing woman 9 months ago, this person has a kid with 10 years old, with adhd, aspenberg and high IQ, condition which i didnt know nothing about it. The child goes alone to school, which is a big achievement, but the mother never really set any boundaries, so the kid has a big screen dependence, mostly laptop. Yesterday he asked his mother to bring water to his room, this was around 11am, the mother told him calmly that its somerhing he can do on his own. He spent the 8 hours escalating the situation, to a point where he was in the kitchen with his bottle full in front of me amd he was continuing asking the mother to bring to the room. It didnt matter the water, the bottle or him being in the kitchen, it only matter that the mother should do it as he wanted. During this period he slammed doors, throw stuff, cried and used emotional language. MY QUESTION is, what if the mother left the house for sometime? Should be better? I AM asking this because with me the kid knows he cannot manipulated me, all his trantums and emotional language dont work with me. Should it been better? Do you think if the weak link its out of the picture all the circus end? Many thanks, you are helping me a lot understanding this stuff....

What if he has 10 years old? Too early to do all of that? Should we do some? Which ones? This advices are for which age? Adolescents, 10 years old?

Please answer to this....the question is how to take out the distractions, laptops or phones when the kid is already immersive into this things, which most are, since if you take them out most likely they will become more annoying, wondering throughout the house doing and practice bad behavior, which usually leads to confrontation. Solutions for the problems not solutions with clean slate since most parents dont start from that point. Thank you.

Thank you SO much. You have been invaluable - in SO thankful I found you. 🙏

Omg do u have a camera in my house 😂fortunately mine behaves at school and saves the chaos for us !

This makes sense. But what if my kid asks the "what if?" I said, "It's an expectation and not a choice," And, Mr. future lawyer of America asked me, but what if I choose not to do it, what is the consequence?

Oh my gosh... as a child I would have been so overstimulated and exhausted if I couldn't go home after school. But I did rush home each day so I could ride my horse, have supper with my family and then go back outside if it was still light out. So it wasn't like I went home to play video games...

Thank you for your videos. Gives me so much hope and motivation. I have a 9 yr old boy and I have a hard time finding fun ways to get him to do something he doesn’t find fun. He use to be more agreeable but now he just says “no….no way I’m not going to do it” I hate having to negotiate with him to make it happen. What am I doing wrong?

Ok... But the vital thing comes to the last two sentences...

👏

Hey bro, thank you so much for the work that you do. It's much appreciated.

Makes sense!!

Thank you. I sent this to my gf yesterday, she called me this morning and said “That shoulder thing really works. I was getting frustrated after repeatedly telling [her 9 y/o] to do a few things. So, I decided to try the shoulder thing and have used it twice already”.

So what should I do with my 10 year old?

😅

Wonderful video! I think your shorts are so helpful and to the point, thank you for sharing these insights!!

This summer we signed my son up for rugby, gymnastics, and piano lessons. Then we took him to the family cottage and he floated on the lake for hours. He helped his uncle demolish our old deck. We also put away all video games and watched a movie or the Olympics together every night. It’s been great!

This is amazing!

This is exactly what we're going through - so what do we do?

Bravo! I cannot remember seeing any bit of ADHD information that was so on point! Parental burnout and hurt is very real!

I am the grandmother of an adopted child who has ADHD and significant trauma. Her parents and I are always looking for ways to help her. Nurtured Heart and Trauma Informed Parenting methods are being implemented. I think we all feel a bit lost and overwhelmed because the ADHD parenting information sometimes seems to be contradictory to TIP. I have read that the job of a parent is to teach, but when trauma is involved the job of the parent is to heal, and until the child feels safe it is very difficult for other things to be implemented. Where does trauma parenting and ADHD overlap, and which, if any, takes precedence? I really like your videos and information-thank you

Nice videos , thanks , do you give some courses ?

Exhaustion and other priorities is a problem. In this modern world it is hard to completely ban screens and fill the time with something else, because ADHD kids often need parental input if not on a screen. It is so hard to get the balance of rest, work and family time with a normal child, and even less so with an ADHD child. Also, in defence of Minecraft, it can be a very creative game, and when played between friends can result in great collaborations and creativity. Not so fortnight and Roblox.

This would have CHANGED MY LIFE!! I am homeschooling my ADHD child. What can I do differently for this child than I do for my neurotypical child?

Thank you ! I’m trying to correct this w my almost 6 year old. Every task gets a “ughhhhhh “ or big sigh and noooooo… from putting on shoes to brushing teeth or using the bathroom. I’ve worked up to him brushing his teeth one time and I do the other… working up to him brushing his own teeth. And yes I know this is ridiculous 😭

These big emotions wont happen as much at school because the person with ADHD has been taught to mask and suppress emotions in fear of ridicule & humiliation.. they arnt just acting up at home for attention, theyre showing their pain in a place they feel safe to do so! Don't fuel the fire but dont dismiss the childs pain by engnoring them either, causing them yet further trauma by expecting someone with a neurodivergent brain to act neurotypical because their emotions are inconvenient to you.. instead of doing research on what actually helps ppl with ADHD do tasks etc.. Body doubling or challenge for example.. Also search help with PDA (pathological demand avoidance) as most ADHD ppl have it. There are ways to help your children without traumatising them by neglecting their needs.. Work with their brains not against them. Half of these "tantrums" (terrible word to use for a child being overwhelmed/frustrated ect) wouldn't even need to happen if ppl did proper research and listened to ppl who know what their talking about like adults with ADHD that have life experience.

❤

This is so true. It is like a mask that my son removes once he is home. He is a totally different person than the subdued guy he is outside.

If you're lucky you can find ways to make non preferred tasks more palatable. For example, cleaning the bathroom by doing one part a day for 4 days instead of all in one day, then building up to 2 paths in a day etc. Allow your child to help plan the tasks so they can provide input as to how to accomplish them but make it clear what needs to to be done and by what deadline.

If you are a parent please don’t fall in this trap of PDA low demand parenting and more screens. I went down this path and child is SO MUCH worse off today.

id like to reframe " difficulty" to disinclined, give me 100 bucks and ill be social for a few minutes. some people cant not be social, extroverts vs introverts.

As a homeschool family, you just described most of my year. But it also explains so much. We've stuck to a household schedule for a full week now and things are getting better. Thankfully my kids have always been very low screen time (1hr a day max) and we take frequent breaks from it so they do love to go play outside.

I absolutely love this! It's a skill I also need to practice.

Thank Christ! That’s one thing we are absolutely doing. And we’re in the process of assessing for ADHD.

Good stuff!

We don't do much screen time at our house for these reasons. 1 or 2 shows a day but only once they have finished their homeschool, chores, and been respectful to others so often it doesn't happen. Problem is my kids use books to do the same thing.

Thanks for this, screens are such an uphill battle.

This all sounds great, I’m not being sarcastic when saying this except it doesn’t work lol What do we do when we have to leave in 15 mins and we find out that even without screens our child just sat there staring at the wall?

Wise words ! 👏🏼👏🏼

I would love to see a video on authoritative parenting style and what that looks like. I feel like I was this type once upon a time but as challenges have mounted, I’ve been worn down and I think I’m more permissive. Help!

WOW.. so so true.

Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge and expertise with us. Your channel is one of the absolute best I’ve seen on UA-cam. You are providing so much value and even a short video like this helps and makes a difference. I’m going to keep working on affective calmness. Thank you. I look forward to watching your channel grow and grow!! 🍀

Thank you for the video. I've been watching several of your videos. Wanted to give you some feedback that several times your audio cuts out in the individual clips right before you are finishing your last sentence.

This is so true. I feel for this trap just the other day. My son and I are both ADHD we often butt heads. But I can also relate to him sooooo much faster than anyone else. Because I know exactly what he is thinking and why he did something before he does it. And not just because I’m mom, but because we are the same. But I am trying to be a way better momma then I experienced. My parents were old school. Corporal punishment, shaming, bullying to encourage better behaviour. It ruined me and any self confidence I ever had. The only attention I ever got was when I was obedient and did everything they wanted when and how. This channel is helping so many of us be better parents to our amazing adhd kids xoxox