Die Kassierer, also Die mächtigen Kassierer, are a satirical punk band from Bochum-Wattenscheid, Germany. The group was founded in 1985 by Wolfgang Wendland, Nikolai Sonnenscheiße, Volker Kampfgarten and Mitch Maestro.
The lyrics of Die Kassierer's songs are mainly about drugs, sex, violence, strange phenomena - such as aliens - and the region the band comes from. Generally their lyrics are extremely satirical and therefore often misunderstood.
Die Kassierer have been criticized for making what has been considered aggressive and socially as well as sexually disorienting music, but up to now only the album Habe Brille has been officially indexed as harmful by the "Bundesprüfstelle für jugendgefährdende Medien". This indexing was due to the original album's pornografic cover. Shortly after the indexing the cover was changed, so that the LP was acceptable for sale in Germany again. Further attempts to label other LPs of Die Kassierer have been blocked by the courts because their songs were deemed satirical and socially critical enough to qualify as art.